July 1, 2013, 6:31 p.m.
Drawn to you: The third life
M - Words: 1,105 - Last Updated: Jul 01, 2013 Story: Complete - Chapters: 10/10 - Created: Jun 23, 2013 - Updated: Jul 01, 2013 110 0 0 0 0
Blaine was terrified of what he had done. He hadn't ever been told that his world was a secret exactly, but that was just because no one thought it was necessary to say aloud. It was too obvious. It would be like calling a meeting of a secret society then reminding everyone it was a secret.
I mean, he hadn't told Kurt EVERYTHING everything, in fact he left out the one piece of information that would make Kurt hate him the most. But he did tell Kurt a lot of things. He told Kurt about the differences in experiencing time. The way he remembered every moment of the 15 meaningful years they had spent together, and how Kurt had inspired him to become a more thoughtful person. The tingling thrill Blaine had experienced the first time they connected in Kurt's dream, the physical pain colored with joy and longing that Blaine had felt as a heart had grown inside his chest the first time Kurt drew him. The first time they made love, tentative and gentle, and the second and third and fourth time, after which Blaine's skin had taken on an olive tone in every place Kurt had kissed. He talked about his music that was inspired by Kurt's art. About how now that he was here in this world, he would be able to share his music with other people and hopefully inspire them.
If Blaine was going to get in trouble, it would happen in a way he didn't expect because he had no idea how that stuff worked here. He knew to keep to himself at first, and to avoid approaching any other people from his world that he might notice. He didn't know if anybody specific existed to police the kind of thing he was doing, just that it went against the very nature of his kind. The three lives were always kept separate, without any notion of one life bleeding into the next.
The first life was about searching and discovery, finding your attrition-mate by showing courage in unfamiliar situations. Reaching out through dreams and honing mental skills as the physical form manifested at its own pace. There were the few who remained in the first life as a muse to great artists, and there was respect for them too, though always tinged with a bit of pity. To be complete was to be actualized, to live all three lives to their fullest.
The second life was the most mentally challenging, and depended so much on circumstance and chance. If the artist awoke during the night, it could all be over in a blink. Some philosophers of his kind held to the belief that the dream life was a chance to fulfill fantasies and make every possibility into a reality. That taking complete control of the second life was their right. Others, like Blaine, thought of the second life as a chance to synchronize with his attrition-mate. Blaine knew that taking control would have meant that he would stifle Kurt's creativity and wouldn't get to know the real Kurt. He had wanted to deepen their connection through shared experiences that felt real, and that they both created. He could not be more sure of his decision at this point. It had been a beautiful tapestry that they wove together.
The third life was not talked about as much as the first two. Some even considered it a type of death. Being left to the monotony of existing only in the flesh. Blaine never understood that view, though. The third life was a glorious opportunity to experience everything that was created by others. There was so much art everywhere, it was overwhelming. It was an opportunity to fall in love again, some said, though that depended very much on personal preference. Some were far too attached to the memories of their attrition-mate to try and form another connection, and any contact with their attrition mate in the third life was a horrible taboo. Some even avoided living in the same country, just to be safe and prevent any chance encounters. There were no stories about what happened if you were with your attrition mate in the third life. No cautionary tales or legends, because it was simply unheard of, as uncomfortable and unnatural as the idea that someone would prefer to live without a limb. Blaine had no idea what the consequences might be for what he was doing, but it was too late to back out now. Fuck it, he thought, this doesn't feel unnatural or wrong. This is happening.
--DTYDTY--
Blaine sat in the park, waiting. Nature was still mysterious to him. It was something new that he hadn't experienced before, and he especially enjoyed the smells, like cut grass and flowers. His heartbeat hadn't slowed all day and he hadn't slept the previous night. He wished he still had the ability to connect with Kurt in a dream, but that part of his life was over now. He just had to wait.
Kurt wasn't smiling when he approached, and Blaine felt panic creep into the body he still wasn't completely used to.
"Hi," Kurt said, breathing evenly and eerily calm. "I want to believe everything you told me. It all feels very...right. Like we fit together in a familiar and comforting way. It's hard to explain. I don't want to lose you, but I also can't jump back into something that was a dream for me. We have to start slowly, okay? Can you maybe pretend that we're just on a date instead of husbands already?"
"Of course I can, Kurt." Tears slowly dripped down his face, barely noticed. This was better than what Blaine had expected when Kurt had left the night before with eyes glazed over and anger radiating off of him. "Can I, um..." Blaine reached out for Kurt's hand, who took it easily, his body remembering the hundreds of times they had done this before. Blaine pulled him in slowly, wrapped his arms around Kurt's waist and rested his head on Kurt's shoulder. "We can do this on a date, right? I need to hold you."
"Yes, we can do this," Kurt whispered.
Blaine knew that there were still secrets to tell, practical things to figure out, and the future to think about. In this moment, though, he couldn't worry about those things because Kurt was here in his arms, in his third life, and all he could feel was hope.