May 14, 2013, 5:49 a.m.
Rebuilding Dreams: Impromptu Affirmations
E - Words: 3,258 - Last Updated: May 14, 2013 Story: Closed - Chapters: 24/? - Created: Feb 22, 2013 - Updated: Apr 13, 2022 441 0 1 0 0
I got to see Kurt perform a few weeks ago. It was his first show since we got back together, and he was amazing. We stayed late at the theater, and I had the pleasure of meeting most of his friends. Erin is hilarious, and in a lot of ways she reminds me of Jessica. She's intense and talented. I met James. He seems tough on his cast, but when you have to live up to running the second highest grossing show on Broadway, well things are important to maintain. Then there was Nicki.
Kurt said he was harmless but something didn't feel right about him. He kept looking at me in a way I felt was almost like sizing me up. I don't know I just I never want to feel that way again. Maybe I should ask Kurt about it, but at the same time I've felt weird from the beginning since my hair fell out so it could have been nothing. The important thing in all of this is that I have Kurt, and I think I know just the way to show him how much of me is in this for the long run.
-B
**
Blaine: Hey babe leaving the clinic now the transfusion is finally over!
Kurt: So glad you're feeling better. I love you feeling better.
Blaine: Thanks babe. The nurse who gave me my test results was surprised I hadn't collapsed. I was like you don't know how stubborn I am, and she gave me one of those flirty smiles until I said I was engaged.
Kurt: Hahaha, damn straight you're engaged. I need to stop being so busy. God, I have to watch you every minute. lol
Blaine: LOL. You don't have to watch me you have to watch these insane women. Do I look straight or better yet do I scream I'm gay come love me? Maybe it's the bald head? Women are attracted to baldness.
Kurt: Oh damn. No, I think you're right. You are one seriously hot bald man. Hmm maybe you need a tattoo. On your head. I feel like this tattoo should be rather large and it should say, Property of Kurt Hummel.
Blaine: HAHA. I'll let you draw it on with Henna, but we have to wait until after Rachel's awards banquet.
Kurt: No, that's no good. I need something right now. I have to protect my assets, Blaine.
Blaine: Really, well marry me then. Tonight after the show. It doesn't have to be official with a judge or witnesses, but it can be a date. Just you and me hand in hand in Central Park.
Kurt: Okay.
Blaine: Really?!
Kurt: Really.
Blaine: I love you.
Kurt: I love you too, Blaine Anderson, you amazing man.
**
Kurt rushed around changing after the show. He felt almost giddy with excitement and everyone around him could feel it radiating off him in waves. He just waved his friends off and rushed to find Blaine. He had a little surprise of his own tucked in his pocket that he'd been carrying around just waiting for the right moment to give it to Blaine. Now, the moment was finally here.
Blaine slipped to the side of the stage during curtain call and waited to meet Kurt. He smiled when he saw him waving off his friends and stepped forward pulling him into a hug and kissing him firmly, "ready?"
"So ready!" Kurt bounced up on the balls of his feet. He wrapped his arm in Blaine's and pulled him out the back exit. There were only a handful of people there so he waved and thanked them, and signed a couple of programs. Then he said his goodbyes and pulled his fiance down to the street so they could call a cab.
Blaine smiled as Kurt pulled him out the back exit. He smiled as Kurt signed a few playbills before pulling him out the curb to hail a cab. The drive to the park was quiet as he snuggled himself against his fiance, twirled the ring on his finger, and whispered soft I love you's against his ear. "Where do you want to do this?" he asked as they got out of the cab.
Kurt cuddled close to Blaine with no thought for the cab driver what so ever. He ran his fingers up Blaine's neck and back down his back, relishing the quiet joy and sheer romantic frivolity of the moment. "Is the Hans Christian Andersen statue okay? Conservatory Water has always been one of those spots I've always thought of as ours," Kurt whispered.
"That's perfect," Blaine smiled as he linked their fingers together to take the short walk to the statue. "I hope this 'seals the deal' so to speak, and protects your assets," Blaine joked as he leaned against Kurt.
"Oh, I'm sure this will be just the thing," Kurt assured him. Then he leaned in and kissed Blaine thoroughly and then tucked Blaine's arm around his elbow as they walked.
Blaine smiled as they walked in sync with arms linked through the park. The night was calm, cool, and due to the hour not as crowded as one would expect. He smiled when he saw the dimly lit figure of the statue and unlinked his arm from Kurt's and pulled him closer to his body.
Kurt's pulse raced as he stepped in closer to Blaine. "We're ridiculous, but I wouldn't have it any other way," he whispered. He'd not meant it to sound so serious, but it felt suddenly serious. It didn't matter that there was no one else here.
"Admittedly we are a bit ridiculous, but it's so worth it," Blaine linked his fingers with Kurt's and smiled as he slid the ring off of his finger, "I need this back for a moment. You start."
He nodded at Blaine. it was so worth it. "Okay," Kurt said softly. He looked into Blaine's eyes, into all the love and hope reflected back at him and he took a breath. "Blaine Anderson," that was as far as he got before he felt the rush of emotion tighten his voice. He smiled at Blaine, wrinkling his nose just a little, and squeezed his hand for courage. "Before I met you, I dreamed of the perfect boy to love. Someone kind and loving, someone brave enough to stand with me, someone intelligent who could keep up with me in school, someone to laugh with and cry with. You were so much more. You challenged me on every level while accepting me always where I was at. You taught me what friendship was about, and you showed me how love changes the people it touches. I have never loved another man the way I love you. I promise to stand by you always. To be honest and faithful, to share your in your pain and your joy, and to spend the rest of my days building our life together with you as your husband." Kurt's voice was breaking toward the end. It wasn't memorized, it was just from the heart. He pulled the ring out of his jacket pocket and slid it onto Blaine's finger, his hands shaking the whole while.
Blaine took in a deep breath as he listened to Kurt's words. His voice was thick with emotion, and his throat tightened and tears threatened as he listened to the words. He sighed as Kurt talked about how he was everything that he had ever wanted in the perfect partner and so much more, and Blaine smiled as Kurt slipped the ring on his finger with his still shaking hands. He clasped his hands over Kurt's and smiled as he looked into his eyes and was met with the same love and care staring back at him.
"Kurt Hummel," he cleared his throat slightly and swallowed against the emotion, "before I met you I didn't know the meaning of love or true friendship. You were kind, caring, and most of all courageous to take the steps that I never could. You showed me what it was like to stand and fight when given the proper encouragement. You helped me grow and learn from my mistakes. You challenged me intellectually and held me up when I felt like I could fall. The last two years without you in my life while comfortable were nothing like the past few weeks with you. You are my everything Kurt, you complete me, you make my present happy and my future so bright. I promise you tonight that I will do everything in my power to love you, protect you, be your best friend and lover. I will always stand by you through the good and bad times, be faithful and honest to you, and I will spend the rest of my life being the best husband that I can be." He pulled the ring out of his pocket and slipped it back on Kurt's finger before leaning in to kiss him softly.
Kurt didn't try to hide the tears that slipped down his face as Blaine spoke. When he was done and the ring was back on Kurt's finger he honestly felt different. There wasn't time to think about it though because Blaine was kissing him and he was kissing Blaine and nothing mattered except that. When Kurt finally had to stop to catch his breath he was laughing softly. He wiped carefully at Blaine's tears, smiling all the while and for just that moment he felt completely happy. "I love you," he said softly.
"I love you too, husband," Blaine whispered as he kissed him softly again and pulled back wiping tears from Kurt's face, "we should go home. I have major plans with you," he chuckled and linked their hands again, "besides it's been a long day."
"It has, my husband," Kurt agreed with a smile. He walked with Blaine back to the road, happy and filled with warmth and love.
Blaine couldn't help but laugh as he helped Kurt into the cab and pulled him back against his warmth before snapping a quick shot of their ring fingers, "Rachel's going to kill us when she sees the picture, but it is so worth it."
"She'll get over it fast enough when we promise her she can upstage us both later in some fabulous gown at the family wedding," Kurt giggled. "You should send that picture to me too," he added, leaning into Blaine.
"Definitely babe," he smiled and kissed him again, "the night's been perfect."
Kurt kissed Blaine, tugging him closer. He didn't have any other words for what tonight had been like so far, so he kissed Blaine deeper, tipping his head back. The night was perfect and when they got home it would be even better.
**
It's been a couple of weeks since I last sat down to write anything here. Today has been a little busy, but good. I rolled over this morning and looked at Blaine still asleep on his pillow and the first thing I noticed was how much better he looked. I know that a lot of that is probably his blood transfusion, but it amazed me the difference I could see already. His color is so much better and the darkness under his eyes is much lighter. It's good to see that, and knowing that he feels a little stronger makes me feel stronger too. Then I was off to rehearsals, and really that was just a lot of hard work. Erin stuck by my side as best she could today. She's a great friend, and I don't tell her that nearly enough. I think she could tell that I was trying to avoid Nicki.
That makes it sound really dramatic but it's not. Nothing has happened. Nicki made Blaine uncomfortable and that's not okay. You know it's not like we were good friends before so it shouldn't be a big deal for us not to talk now, but it's like he keeps trying to catch me alone. So I'm just never alone. I focused on getting through the songs and dance numbers and before I knew it, the day was over. Tomorrow my dad and Carole get here. They're coming to the show and then we're supposed to have dinner with them afterwards at their hotel. All in all this week has been pretty damn good. I'd love it if Blaine could be done with chemo, could be cancer free. We're not there yet, but this week has been a little taste of what that could be like for us, and it gives me hope.
-K
**
Kurt had never been to the Westin, but he'd heard amazing things about it. Shula's was the hotel's steakhouse and as they sat Kurt took a quick look around at the white tablecloths and darkly paneled walls. It was lovely and sophisticated, and not too busy at this late hour. "I can't believe we're staying here this weekend," he leaned over and whispered at Blaine." Then he turned to his dad and Carole, smiling and happy.
Burt smiled as he watched Kurt interact with Blaine. He was worried about both of them. He had been where they were, sitting in the wake of a serious illness, and he worried about Kurt. He worried about the impact that this could have on Kurt's life, He worried about the impact on Blaine's, but he swallowed those thoughts and feelings for the evening because they were clearly happy, and that was all that mattered to Burt in this moment. He wrapped a free arm around Carole as he turned and smiled at Kurt. "So what's new with you guys?"
Carole noted the way the boys leaned into each other and smiled. She was still worried for Blaine, and for them both really. She'd lost a husband, and granted it wasn't the same situation at all, but the thought was still there about how she could help Kurt cope. She turned to Burt when he placed an arm around her and smiled back at the boys. "You both look really well. Especially you Blaine. Last time Kurt sent pictures you didn't look like you felt that great."
Blaine smiled at Kurt before looking to Burt and twirling the ring on his hand nervously, "not much really. I'm going back to work part time next week which will be nice, and yeah those pictures were taken right at the end of my last chemo hell week. I was really anemic so I was really feeling down, but I'm feeling a lot better now."
Kurt sipped at his water, then added, "But you're feeling better now, and I've just completed my first week back to work. It's been a pretty busy week all in all."
Burt nodded and smiled at the young men in front of him before reaching for his menu and studying it some more. He had never really been one for tact so noticing the rings on both of their fingers he figured why not just address it right away because it wasn't like he could stop two grown men from making a decision, but if they weren't already married maybe he could persuade them to wait. He turned to Blaine. "What are your intentions with Kurt?"
Blaine choked on his water slightly, coughing as he recovered, and smiled, "keeping him safe for life." He unlinked his hand with Kurt's, "Burt, I love him, and want to be with him, and while I know and understand that things haven't always been pleasant between Kurt and I especially the last two years, the separation has given me time to grow as a person, and I have never been more certain of anything before now."
Carole glanced nervously at Burt. She wasn't about to stop him, he had every right to ask, but he had never been one for tact. Preferring to always get straight to the heart of a matter. She loved him for it most of the time, but they hadn't even placed their drink orders. Carole squeezed his arm just a tiny bit, hoping to convey calm, but also support.
"And I love him, I'm choosing him," Kurt said almost defensively against his father, and he wrapped his hand around Blaine's arm for emphasis. "We're doing this," he said, "and just so that everyone's clear, no isn't an option."
Burt felt his face go warm at Blaine's abruptness and Kurt's tone and he looked into his menu for a moment before looking to Carole and back at Kurt and Blaine. He knew that he shouldn't argue. Kurt was stubborn and he would do it despite Burt's approval or not, maybe in fact they already were. He was worried, but truth of the matter Blaine wasn't a bad guy and it would be selfish of him to keep them apart or not accept their reconciliation over something as complex as his past. He smiled at both of the men. "Then I support your decision."
"We both do," Carole added. She'd just seen the ring flash on Blaine's finger and wondered if that was what had started Burt out on this topic, but it didn't much matter. Kurt was a determined young man; he always had been. When he wanted something he went after it with a vengeance and there was no point trying to get in his way. These boys were going to need all the love and support they could get, and that was what Carole intended to give them. It helped to know that Burt was on the same page too.
Blaine swallowed hard against the emotions rising in his throat and linked fingers with Kurt. It really meant a lot to him to have Burt and Carole's support especially considering his own strained relationship with his father at times. He smiled and whispered, "thank you," before looking back down into his menu and taking a few deep breaths.
Kurt leaned in and kissed Blaine very swiftly on the cheek before lifting his own menu and looking for something to order. He did sneak a grin over to his dad after a moment. Then he asked the waiter for a blush wine and waited just a little bit while the others ordered their drinks and turned back to their menus. Burt watched a moment as Kurt leaned over and kissed Blaine's cheek. It was obvious the amount of care and love that Kurt had for Blaine. He smiled back at Kurt in reaffirmation of his support and ordered a glass of red wine before turning to Carole and smiling.
The rest of the evening went smoothly as they all got caught up on each others lives. It felt so good to be together, sharing a meal and laughing with one another, that both Blaine and Kurt were able to relax and leave their worries behind for a couple of hours. They spent that entire weekend at the hotel, luxuriating in the chance to just be totally alone at the end of each day and wrapped up in each other safe from the outside world and the many stresses that faced them each and every day. Neither of them realizing just how quickly things might take another turn for the worse or what troubles might be right around the corner.
Comments
Their Central Park wedding was so beautiful! Well done!