Nov. 17, 2012, 6:45 a.m.
Faded memories.: Chapter 8.
E - Words: 1,345 - Last Updated: Nov 17, 2012 Story: Closed - Chapters: 17/? - Created: Jul 07, 2012 - Updated: Nov 17, 2012 812 0 6 0 0
Chapter 8.
"I-I uh." Kurt stuttered.
"You what, Kurt? Because it looks to me like you lied." He said. His voice wasn't angry in the slightest. It just sounded hurt and broken. It cut into Kurt like a thousand knives, angry Blaine he could deal with, but seeing the hurt in him that he had put there, tore him apart.
"I'm sorry I was just trying to-"
"Whatever you were trying to do, isn't important. What is important is that you lied to me. Me of all people Kurt. Why?" Blaine's voice broke as he spoke, he was determined not to cry, but that wasn't going too well.
"I didn't want to upset you." Kurt whispered, tears pricking at his eyes.
Blaine scoffed and threw his arms in the air. "Nothing could hurt more than you lying to me Kurt! I love you and you loved me too once and you say you do now, but how can you if you're willing to be dishonest to me?
"I don't know. I just did it, I wasn't going to, it just happened. I saw how you looked at me and how much you cared, and I just couldn't break it to you that I remembered us meeting but not dating!"
"Don't you get how this is so much worse now, because you lied. I would've been so happy if you'd told me. I get that this is a long process, but hearing about those steps would've made me unbelievably happy! And ugh-dammit. Now I'm crying. Don't you get it Kurt? Look at me. I. Love. You. I'm willing to wait for you, just don't lie to me." He titled his head towards the sky, letting the tears fall freely. He managed to regain some composure and looked back at Kurt, who was too crying, but out of guilt, not betrayal.
"Blaine I-"
"Don't Kurt. Don't say you're sorry. You're not sorry!"
"How do you know what I am or what I'm not!" Kurt yelled a lot louder than intended.
"Because I know you, I love you! I've known you and loved you for four years! That's why this hurts so freaking much, Kurt! Because, in all of those for years, you've never lied to me once, ever. It's the one boundary we would never cross!"
"WELL HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHAT I DID IF I CAN'T REMEMBER ANYTHING!?" Kurt yelled. He shot Blaine one last look of desperation before storming out of the bedroom and into the bathroom.
"Kurt-" Blaine called after him. He chased behind him, but was just a millisecond late and ended up with a door slammed just a centimetre from his face. He didn't know what to think. Kurt had lied to him, he had broken the one thing they had promised they'd never do. But on the other hand, Kurt seemed to have done this to keep Blaine safe, and he didn't even know about the promise they had made all those years back after the Chandler fight.
Kurt finished writing the last promise on the list. He had the neater handwriting, so he had done it. He smiled softly at Blaine before relaxing into his arms. They looked at the list on an A3 sheet of yellow paper, written in Kurt's neat handwriting, with magazine cuttings spelling out, "I PROMISE" at the top of the sheet. The list read.
To never lie,
To never cheat,
To always be kind to you,
To never let anyone tear us down,
To stand by you forever,
To kiss you and hold you when you cry,
To support you through whatever,
To trust you,
To be there for you whenever and wherever,
To talk out any fights,
To love you until the day I die.
At the bottom were two spaces. Blaine and Kurt each took a pen and filled them with their signatures. When Miss Pilsbury had suggested this, they had thought it would be silly or childish, but now the piece of paper seemed like it was the most precious thing on earth. They took each other's hands, looked into one another's eyes and without any second thought, both said.
"I promise."
Blaine felt the tears fall down his face even harder at the memory. He needed to fix this. It was part of the promise to talk out any fights, and if Kurt didn't remember, he needed to step up. He knocked on the bathroom door, "Kurt?"
"Go away, Blaine." Kurt sniffed. "Just leave me be."
"No. That's not how this is happening. We had a list of promises, one of them was not too lie, but one of them was to talk through any fights. So we're doing that. Okay?"
On the other side of the wall Kurt froze. He could remember something, yellow? He kept thinking and thinking, until the thought of the list came back. He could remember making it, but not why and not what happened after, but he remembered making it, and that had to count for something, right?
"Kurt?" He heard Blaine ask. "Kurt, please don't ignore me."
Kurt opened the door tentatively and looked at Blaine. "The list. Was it yellow?"
Blaine's heart skipped a beat and his tears fell even faster now. "Yes! YES!"
Kurt closed his eyes to focus. "To never lie, to never cheat, to always be kind to you, to never let anyone tear us down, to stand by you forever, to kiss you and hold you when you cry, to support you through whatever, to trust you, to be there for you whenever and wherever, to talk out any fights, to love you until the day I die?" He opened his eyes again, and Blaine nodded, he was speechless. He couldn't find a word to describe his love for Kurt in that one moment, so he kissed him instead.
He placed a hand gently on the back of Kurt's neck and one around his waist, and pulled him on close, placing a kiss on his lips. Kurt kissed back with the same amount of passion, it was soft and gentle and full to the brim with love. Eventually Blaine pulled back slowly. "I love you." They said in perfect synchronisation.
"I think, we should talk this through, then we can order a Chinese and continue watching films you missed?" Blaine suggested, smiling slightly.
"I think that sounds perfect." Kurt agreed.
-
A week and a half later found Blaine and Kurt outside a doctor's office waiting for a check up on Kurt. It had been a month since the attack. Kurt had only remembered them meeting, the list, moving to Dalton (Blaine wept like a baby at that) winning nationals, moving in to New York and starting university. Everything else was a blur. He was remembering things in the wrong order though and it was confusing the life out of him.
"Mr Hummel?" A doctor called.
Kurt and Blaine stood up and followed the doctor in silence. "So how have things been, Mr Hummel?"
"I lost four years after the accident, I'm remembering buts of the first three, but in the wrong order."
"Okay, well, that seems perfectly normal. Memories never tend to have an order, and recent one's will be harder to access. I'll need to see you weekly to keep an update on how things are going, there might be certain things though, that never return. Or you may remember them, but not know it."
"What do you mean?" Blaine asked, now exceedingly worried.
"Well, not all memories will come back as a flashback, you may find you remember a lot more if you try to recount the past every other day. Then you'll get a fair idea of how you are doing. And sometimes, stuff just never comes back. Some of it, you won't care about or even notice you forgot, that's just being human, but in some cases, there will be things you'll never remember."
Kurt couldn't believe what he was hearing, what if he had lost an important memory with Blaine? What if he was never the same again, what if he was left with a piece of him missing forever. No, he decided. It was going to be okay. Blaine was here, it was going to be okay.
Comments
aww :( that list was freeakin adorable! i love how he rmemebered itz! that was awesomeupdate soon! love this <3im like addicted
like the way that Kurt remembered the "I promise list"...it shows that those promises to/with Blaine were important to him and their love
Is this going to be somewhat like the vow where he never gets his memory back but he falls in love with Blaine anyway, or is he going to get it back? I know you won't answer it, but this is what's going through my mind while reading the end of the chapter.
As always. Beautiful. I really enjoyed the list :') Xx
Nooo, please don't make Kurt forget about Blaine! Also, loved this chapter (and all of the others) x3
:( no update?