Chapter 11

“Honey, are you crying?” Blaine asks me while a smile plays on his face.

“No! Must have been a bug or something. I got something in my eye.” I grumble back and try to hide my face in the diary.

“You have no idea how long I wanted to tell you about my plans to move to New York, but I had no confirmation until that day and I didn't want to say something and then it not work out. So I was as surprised as you at the same time. But your face was so worth it. And the incredible sex afterward.” Blaine wiggles his eyebrows mischievously and I just giggle at his words and kiss him softly.

“Okay, what's next?” Blaine gets a bit impatient now that we're heading towards his move to New York. I turn some more pages to find the one he's hinting at:

May 2014

Dear diary.

BEST.BIRTHDAY.EVER!!!!!

I had an awesome birthday. Incredible. Terrific. No words. Just gah!

I got loooooooooads of presents, my girls threw me a wonderful party and the love of my life moved in with the girls and I. What can be better? I'm over the moon right now and I can't wait to get domestic with my man. I mean, okay, we will need time to adjust to all the new stuff and Blaine has no idea what will hit him when the girls are on their periods. He will be run over by a freight train. But I gave him a warning. I am a thoughtful boyfriend at least. Especially San and Rachel, they are horrible at those times. They cry and yell and scream and cry some more and yell even louder and munch a whole can of ice-cream per day. After that they complain that they will get fat now and that they hate everyone and everything. Then they demand a back and foot rub because they are in so much pain and we owe them attention and kindness because they are the poor creatures who have to go through a pregnancy and they have the awful pain during labor. Then they start laughing hysterically, try to curl themselves around you to be comforted and then they yell again that it's all 'Adam's fault because he let himself be seduced by Eve and took the damn apple in paradise and ate it. And that's why men are all weak pigs and can't say no to a pretty girl'. These are not my words! WHAT THE HELL??? As you can imagine, one of the girls is on their period right now. I could write books about their strange behavior. I love my girls endlessly but I'm so thankful that I don't have these weird mood swings. I am bitchy without all that shit. And in this case I'm even thankful that I'm not straight and have to deal with a girlfriend. I mean in THAT way. Holy fuck...

Well, it's time for summer break. My internship is still going great and I will have a lot of work over the summer. I even got feedback for my first sketches and they loved them. Blaine is looking for a job too. Hopefully he can find something to occupy himself. The girls have jobs and he would be all alone the whole time. I know Blaine. He would go insane after 3 days. Well maybe 6 days when he does some sightseeing before. Haha. Sorry, couldn't hold that one back. Hm, what else happened? Nothing much I'd say. OH! I nearly forgot. Mercedes finally found her man. His name is Bobby and he's a few years older than her. I'm so happy for her. Elliot and Ben moved in together. YAY. It's just a matter of time until one of them proposes now.

Holy mother of god... Blaine just entered our bedroom and he's only wearing a tiny towel around his hips. Um. Sorry, I'm drooling on the page right now. I have to go and ravish my boyfriend. If you could see his body. Ngh. I'm already hard. Uh that will end in another shower for both of us in a bit. Sorry. Bye, Kurt xo

After finishing to read this entry Blaine can't hold his laughter back anymore. He nearly screams from laughing. Tears run over his cheeks and he's red in the face from holding back. I mean, I admit that my writing was or is kind of silly and sometimes even annoying or boring, but I don't get why the hell he's laughing so loud. Nothing I wrote was really that funny.

“Blaine...,” I just huff and slap his arm. “What the hell is so funny?”

“Give me a second,” Blaine hiccups and brushes away the tears from his face. After getting himself under control again he coughs once and turns to face me fully.

“Sorry, darling. I was just laughing about your perfect description of a woman's mood while on her period. Especially Rachel and Santana. Oh god, I remember the first month when I didn't have any idea what hit me. I can really laugh about it now, but that first month I really thought about sleeping at Elliot's for that time.”

“What?” I interrupt him and he back-paddled a bit.

“I was scared like crazy and I couldn't really deal with their behavior. It got better though. Thank god. And I can honestly say that I love the girls like crazy, but I'm so happy that we found our own place after a while. The whole bathroom fights and kitchen fights and grocery shopping fights were kind of scary.”

I remember the situations and smile fondly at that thought. “Mhhh, yes. That was not really easy with us 5 living together.”

“Do you remember that I often showered in the middle of the night because I had no other choice? Oh my god. Getting up at 3am to use the shower and then getting yelled at for making noises in the middle of the night,” Blaine snickers.

“Ha! Mostly, my darling, you went to shower at that time because we were just done with having sex. Don't blame the girls now. Blame yourself. You were insatiable.” I grin challenging in his direction and I don't have to wait long for his reply.

“You've got to be kidding me! It was mostly YOU who seduced me late at night to have sex,” Blaine chuckles and shakes his head in disbelief.

“Well, you may be right about that but I never heard any complaints from you, so don't blame me now,” I wink at him and wet my lips seductively.

“Oh no! Hell no! I can't go at it again, Kurt. Give me a few hours.” Blaine moans and throws his head back against the headboard.

“Calm down, I was just messing with you. Shall we go on?” I pat his thigh and turn my attention back to my diary.

Blaine mumbles his approval and I turn some more pages.

July 2014

Dear diary.

It's so fucking hot this summer. FUCK. If I could, I would sleep in the bathtub. With cold water in it. I can't get enough sleep. It's too hot to sleep, it's too hot for sex and it's too hot to just lay on the bed while wearing nothing but briefs. And then you have a boyfriend who sleeps the whole night on his back because of the heat and snores the whole fucking time. I threw him out last night and he slept on the couch. Blaine wasn't really happy with me and we had a fight this morning. It was a really bad one. I accused him of doing that on purpose and yelled that it would have been better for all of us if he had decided to sleep in the dorms. I know that classes haven't started yet, but I'm moody when I don't get enough sleep. He could at least have tried to sleep on his front. Fuck. Blaine just looked at me as if I had slapped him in the face, packed a small bag without another word and left the apartment with a loud slam of the front door. Fuck. Am I right or did I overreact? The girls are just eying me suspiciously. I know that they don't want to choose anyone's side here but at least someone could tell me who overreacted this time. He didn't pick up the phone yet. I think Rachel and Blaine texted today, but she didn't tell me anything. How am I supposed to get any sleep tonight when I have no idea where he is and when he'll come back. Shit. I'll text him now...

No answer.... Fuck he is so uncooperative sometimes. And I thought that I would be the drama queen. Maybe I'll call Elliot and Ben. Blaine hasn't made many friends yet because school starts in September and he's mostly with us. I'll call Elliot now...

Okay, he's with Elliot and Ben. At least they told me that he's okay so far but that he won't come back home tonight. Well I guessed that already with a packed overnight-bag. Do they think I'm dumb or what? Nice friends I have. Finn said to me something like 'dude, that was awful of you. No wonder that Blaine left you'. WTF?? I called Mercedes after that and told her what happened and what did she say to me? 'Boo, how could you say this to Blaine? Are you nuts? No one snores on purpose to annoy his partner. Bobby snores too but we figure it out nonetheless. Get over yourself and apologize to your man. Pronto.' Fucking fuck. Are they all against me now? I'm going to bed now, otherwise I'll do something horrible. Like telling my friends that they could fuck themselves and to never put their noses into my business again. Maybe I should call dad. He's probably the only person who would understand me. Fuck it. I go to bed. Kurt

“Blaine...,” I start but Blaine puts his hand on my mouth to shut me up.

“No more apologizing, honey. You said you're sorry many many times and I know your temper. Please don't apologize for that again. All is forgiven and not worth mentioning again, okay?” 'Blaine shushes me and takes his hand back from my mouth.

“Okay, but please know that I know that I was awful and wrong.” I beg and throw him my puppy look.

“I know, darling. Come on, let's continue.” He gets comfortable again and I scroll the diary.

July 2014

Dear diary.

It's been 5 fucking days. 5 days since Blaine left the apartment and slept at Elliot's. 5 whole days of no text or call or anything. 5 days since all the people around me told me that I'm childish, stubborn and fucking unfair. At first I was really pissed. Even dad scolded me and told me that I'm being unfair and that what I said was so out of line. I had a few days to think about it and I am aware that I treated Blaine like shit. I want to make it better and I want him to come back to me. I have no idea if he's that mad that he would break up with me. I'm hurting and I realize that I hurt him a lot more. I miss him. I miss his presence, his smile, his eyes, his embrace, his reasonable self and just him as a person, as my boyfriend and the love of my life. I need a plan to make it up to him. Today! I cried myself to sleep the last 2 days. I know it's my fault and I am so fucking sorry. I have to call Elliot and ask for his help. I will prepare the apartment with a romantic setting, will ask the girls to maybe have a night out and try to convince Elliot that he needs to get Blaine home to me. I will cook Blaine's favorite lasagna, buy flowers and beg for forgiveness. Okay, first draft of the plan is done. I need to call people, go places and get my man back home. Wish me luck, Kurt

“See? That's what I meant,” Blaine says and smiles at me. “You got it in the end. And because I knew you, I waited for you to come around. Maybe I was acting a bit childish too, but your making up was awesome.”

“Thank you, honey. And I have to say we enjoyed ourselves immensely that night,” I say with a smirk on my face before I turn the next page.

August 2014

Dear diary.

I'm so happy right now. Blaine forgave me. Multiple times... *cough*.

Elliot and Ben surprised Blaine last night and cajoled him to go for a walk with them and when they stood in front of our apartment building Blaine already knew what they planned and when he knocked on the front door I was so nervous like I was on our first date. I practically ran to the door and had to hold myself back when Blaine stood in front of me with a curious but reserved look on his face. I hurt him and the thought came crashing down on me. I started to sob and wail on the doorstep. Blaine's eyes got huge and he threw himself into my arms. After closing the door he shushed me and wiped the tears from my face. (God he's so selfless. I behaved like a spoiled child and a fucking brat and he comforted ME...). After my tears subsided I told him how sorry I was and he just kissed me passionately to shut me up. After a few minutes of just kissing and holding each other Blaine let me apologize. I pulled him into the living room where I had dimmed the lights, put on some soft music and already placed the meal on the coffee-table. When we were done eating with flirtatious glances and a little groping, Blaine said that he forgave me already and that he would come home. We danced in our living room to some romantic ballads, shared soft kisses and let our hearts beat a fast rhythm when we started to get rid of each others clothes as fast as possible. I nearly threw Blaine on the couch and before he knew what was happening I already engulfed his dick in my mouth. Blaine panted already hard when I started to deep-throat him and when he started to fuck my mouth I moaned around him like a whore. Bing, and then he came. After he came down from his high we cuddled for a while on the couch. I refused to let him return the favor. This was about him and my apology to Blaine. We went to our bedroom later where I let Blaine handcuff me to the headboard and he fucked me into the mattress in 3 different positions. I have to say that make-up sex is the best kind of sex. It's passionate and frantic and full of kinks. Not that I don't love slow building sex and the teasing. Of course I do, but when you crave your partner after days of not touching and speaking it's like a drug. You are high on sex. We made the most of it and I can say that we are both crazy sore today. Holy fuck. Every muscle in my body aches. The girls came back this morning when Blaine and I were still sleeping and because they are annoying and they love us both immensely, they jumped on the bed and we startled awake in panic. Crazy bitches. But I love them to the moon and back. We had a celebratory breakfast and everything feels like it's back to normal again. I am a little clingy today but Blaine doesn't seem to mind. I mean I can't really promise that it will never happen again, I know myself, but I promise that I won't wait 5 days again until I make a move to beg for forgiveness. Only if it's my fault, of course. Duh... I have to go back to work tomorrow. I took a day off to resolve everything with Blaine. My co-workers were incredibly annoyed with my huffing and attitude. They couldn't stand me for the last days and my boss told me that if I didn't get my man back, he would move me to the storage or the post department where I could spread my moodiness all by myself. Good that we figured it out at last. I hate the storage. It's cold and it smells bad in there. Well. Let's just say that I'm freaking happy that Blaine forgave me and I can return to work in my normal mood.

Oh, Mercedes told me that Sugar and Artie are dating now. Huh. Didn't see that coming. Well, I'm happy for them. Okay, I'll wake my adorable boyfriend. He took a nap. Said that he couldn't really sleep on Elliot's and Ben's couch. Not only because it's not really comfy, but the noises. Holy hell, Elliot and Ben must be even worse than Blaine and I in the bedroom. Haha. Poor Blaine. See ya, Kurt

“You have actually no idea what those guys were up to. And they didn't even care that there were other people around them. I have to ask them if they are still that way. Or maybe we just ask their son Marlon. I bet he can tell us some funny things about his dads,” Blaine laughs and I just roll my eyes.

I know everything about Elliot's and Ben's sex-life. Not that I ask anything about it at all but Elliot chats a lot when we meet. And most of the things he shares with me I never wanted to know.

“Believe me, honey, I know!” With that I just wink at him and turn back to my diary for the next entry.

October 2014

Dear diary.

Is it bad when I have to admit that I am an incredibly jealous person and I did something really bad? And childish? Like really childish? And I didn't have the courage to talk to Blaine about it? Because I'm ashamed of myself? I am guilty, so guilty and I wake up in the middle of the night soaked in sweat. NO! I didn't kill or physically harm anyone. But let me start from the beginning:

There is a guy in Blaine's classes. His name is Jack. He is so obviously after my boyfriend. Blaine told me many times that they are only friends and he would never encourage Jack that they would ever be more than friends. I totally trust Blaine. I always did. But this guy is always charming and has a perfect body and perfect hair and a perfect face. He is a nice guy, I have to admit that, but my skin tingles in a bad way when he is around. So some of Blaine's friends were talking about Jack, when he was not around and they said that Jack cheated on the last test and he traded the answer papers for their next test for a blowjob with said professor under his desk. They were joking about it and no one was a bit concerned or disgusted by his behavior. So maybe I called the administrative office of the college anonymously and told them exactly this. They must have found evidence in Jack's dorm room and he got expelled immediately. His parents were informed and he had to go back to Kentucky to study in community college. The professor got fired too. I mean, I'm sorry that I ruined his career in a way but it's not okay to hand over papers to encourage cheating for getting a blowjob in return. So, what should I do? Should I tell Blaine that I was the one who got Jack expelled because I was jealous or not? Secrets are never good in a relationship. I know that. What if he hates me for ruining their friendship? No I can't deal with it by myself. I'll talk to him later and will admit what I did. And I will tell him how sorry I am. I snapped. It was a hasty decision and I didn't think about the consequences. Well shit. Let's see what will happen after I tell him.

Wish me luck :-( Kurt