Shattered Memories
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Shattered Memories: Two Faces


M - Words: 3,629 - Last Updated: Nov 06, 2011
Story: Closed - Chapters: 10/? - Created: Sep 30, 2011 - Updated: Nov 06, 2011
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He felt disgusted with Karofsky and disgusted with himself. Once again, he shuddered and he rushed down the hallway to the open bathroom to vomit in the toilet. But as he turned into the dark room, he crashed into someone. He fell backwards in the darkness, dizzy from the repulsion and the sudden impact of the crash. He stood up shakily, his face pale from sickness and turned on the light. His gaze fell on the boy standing in front of him, the rims of his eyes were red and there were tear streaks trailing down his cheeks.

"Blaine...?"

The blue eyes met the hazel, but what they found etched across the surface was nothing but disbelief and disappointment. Without thinking, Kurt raised his shaking hand to touch Blaine's cheek but it was slapped away.

"Don't—"

"Blaine, it's not what you think—"

"How could you?" Blaine whispered, unable to keep his voice from breaking. He walked past Kurt and rushed down the stairs. He could feel his heart plummeting far below his stomach with every step he took. Every movement caused a stitch at his side, made every breath more painful. He couldn't see where he was going, but it didn't matter. He needed to get away.

x x x

"KURT! OPEN UP!"

Kurt's eyes twitched but he simply rolled over on the bed. Just five more minutes, he thought. He felt something shuffling on the bed next to him and opened his eyes. Blaine was lying there, still in his clothes from earlier in the day. It took Kurt a moment to register what was going on. He sat up quickly and looked around. He was still in Blaine's dorm room and it was 6:24 AM? And who was that knocking on the door?

Shit, Kurt thought as the dread filled him, I fell asleep here?

"KURT HUMMEL, OPEN UP THE DOOR RIGHT NOW OR I WILL BREAK IT DOWN!"

"DAD?" Kurt untangled himself from the sheets and rushed to open the door. Blaine woke up just in time to tame down his hair before Burt Hummel stormed in.

"DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT YOU'VE DONE?" Burt yelled.

"Dad, I'm sorry, we fell asleep-"

"Didn't even have the decency to call! Do you have any idea how worried we all were? You could have been hurt! You didn't even answer your phone. I've been up all night waiting to hear from you, not knowing anything from you! All Finn said was that you were with Blaine, but to not even call us at twelve? Do you have any idea how worried we've been—"

"Dad, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to—we were here since yesterday afternoon and we just fell asleep—this is our first time waking up since!" Kurt could feel his heart hammering wildly against his chest.

"Yeah, Mr. Hummel, I'm so sorry we didn't get in touch—" Blaine started, but got cut off.

"I don't want to hear another word out of the two of you. What you did was completely irresponsible. I trusted you Kurt and you went behind my back and fell asleep here without my permission. Not only is that completely out of line, but you broke my trust too. "

"But Dad, it's not what you think—"

"You're grounded, Kurt. End of story. Three weeks. And that means no seeing Blaine until the two of you learn to respect my rules."

Kurt looked like he was about to argue back, but Blaine merely shook his head and smiled apologetically. "I'm sorry Mr. Hummel…" He said softly, and he watched as Burt stalked off again, followed by a fuming Kurt.

The two of them stayed silent on the car ride back to Lima. Kurt was far too upset and angry to talk. It was unfair. They didn't mean to fall asleep the entire day! Between the long conversation they had and all of the crying, they just knocked out and suddenly it was next morning. How was that their fault? And why did his dad have so little trust in him?

But there was no use arguing about it. Any back talk would earn him more weeks of punishment and that was already going to be insufferable enough. When they finally got to the house, Kurt rushed in and went down to his bedroom without a single word.

"Is he okay?" Carole asked as Burt walked in. He simply gave her a look and sat down on the couch, covering his face with his hands. Finn, who was sitting in the living room, thought it was best to leave them alone and went down to visit Kurt.

The moment Kurt heard the door open, he got under the covers of his bed. He tried to feign sleep, hoping to avoid having another discussion with his father.

"You can stop pretending like you're asleep." Finn said as he jumped on the lump hiding under the covers.

"FINN! GET OFF!" He shouted, his voice muffled. He wrestled his way out from under the covers and shot his brother a glare.

"So, how was it?" Finn asked with a dopey grin on his face.

"How was what?"

"You know," Finn winked. "You two did the deed right?"

"God, Finn!" He said with exasperation. "You're disgusting. We barely even kiss," he hissed, a blush creeping up his cheeks.

Finn's face fell in disappointment. "Oh…so what did happen then?"

"I went to talk with him and then we fell asleep."

Finn raised his eyebrow in suspicion.

"Look, we were crying a lot, okay? We laid down on the bed and he was crying and then we both fell asleep. That's all that happened. The first thing to wake us up was Dad."

"How boring," Finn mumbled, getting up. "I thought you'd have a better story." And with that he went back upstairs, disappointment clearly written on his face. He turned to Burt as he reached the top of the stairs and gave him a glum look. "You don't have to be worried, they didn't do anything." And with that, he went upstairs to his bedroom.

Carole laughed out loud and turned to Burt. "I don't know if you should be happy to know nothing happened, or concerned that Finn is so upset nothing did happen." Burt only groaned in response.

__________________________________________

The next few days were long for Kurt. His father had taken away his phone, meaning that it would be nearly impossible to get in contact with Blaine. Even Glee club wasn't helping him keep his mind off his boyfriend.

"Have you decided what song you're going to do for the Disney video?" Mercedes asked him, as everyone was waiting for Mr. Schuester to come into the choir room.

"Well, I have a song in mind but I wanted to have Blaine in my video. Since I can't see him for another three weeks, all of my plans for this video are ruined." He mumbled.

"You could make it a picture slideshow?" Mercedes suggested. Kurt merely gave her a glare.

"Well Kurt, it's not like you were going to show it to him anyways, right? So why does it matter if he's in the video or not?" Rachel asked.

"Actually, Rachel, I considered that I might give it to him as a present."

"Oh, so is it okay for me to show him the other—"

"What?"

Rachel's face paled considerably and she looked around, as if willing the others to help her.

"The other what, Rachel?" Kurt said venomously.

"Nothing." Rachel squeaked, but she was saved any more explanation by Mr. Schuester's appearance.

"Okay guys, time to get to work. I brought all the equipment that the A/V club had, so get started. During this period, you're free to roam around to film your videos. Just make sure you're doing your work! Get to it!"

Everyone grabbed a camera and piled out of the choir room. Kurt made his way to the art room, a wonderful idea already sparking in his mind. He knocked on the door and after waiting for a minute, he peeked inside. The entire classroom was empty except for a boy at the far end of the room, his back turned to the door.

"Excuse me, I was wondering if you could help me with something." Kurt said from the doorway. The boy at the end of the room didn't turn around. After a moment of silence, he tried again. "Or…do you know if there's anyone else who can help me? I really need an art student—"

"They're all gone on a field trip." The boy said as he turned around. Kurt let out a gasp. "Come in and shut the door Hummel."

Karofsky was sitting there at the bench, in attire that was completely different from his daily look. Instead of his emblazoned letterman's jacket, he wore a black shirt covered with paint streaks, a smock that was equally covered, and his usual pair of jeans.

Kurt stood in the doorway with his mouth agape. His nerves failed him and he didn't know whether he had enough guts to run right then and there.

"What's the matter? Didn't recognize me without my jacket on?" Karofsky laughed bitterly. There was something different about him. Not only his attire, but in the way his shoulders drooped and the lack of belligerence in his tone of voice. He seemed like a completely different person. His lack of insults were also quite notable, as he usually included them within the first sight of Kurt.

Kurt finally stepped fully into the room and closed the door behind him. He remained where he stood, however. Just because Karofsky was acting weird didn't take away from the things he'd done to Kurt the last time they had an encounter.

"What do you need help with?" Karofsky asked, still looking at Kurt from the other side of the room.

Kurt's voice came out hoarsely, "Oh…well I wanted an art student…"

Karofsky looked at him for a moment, his gaze unreadable. "I am."

"What?"

"Why do you sound so surprised?" Karofsky said defiantly.

"Well, I thought all you knew how to do was play football and act like a Neanderthal." The words had escaped Kurt's mouth before he even registered what he was saying. He gasped, covering his mouth in fear. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean—"

"It's cool. Not a lot of people think I'm useful for other things either." He mumbled in response.

Kurt's eyes widened in shock. What on Earth had just happened? He had insulted David Karofsky, the person who got angry at the first sight of Kurt, and nothing had happened. He had expected an outburst, a stampede of punches to come his way – and yet, Karofsky had done nothing. What was going on?

"Who are you?" Kurt whispered.

"I don't know." Karofsky replied. He buried his head in hands and turned away from Kurt.

Kurt took a few steps closer, stopping at an empty table and depositing the video camera. The answer he had received was unexpected and had caught him by surprise. "What's wrong?"

"It's nothing. Forget it." Karofsky said, wiping his eyes. "Didn't you want help with something?"

Kurt bit his lip, unsure of where to go from there. What he had just witnessed was by far, the weirdest experience of his life. He didn't know whether to prod further in order to keep this strangely calm Karofsky around, or whether he should stay quiet and allow the crazy lunatic to come back to his senses.

"I'm not going to hurt beat you up, alright? Just tell me what you need help with and I'll do it."

Kurt hesitated for a moment, but he sat down at the empty table anyways. He was still going to keep his distance, just in case, but for the moment this calm Karofsky intrigued him far too much to let him escape.

"Are you any good at drawing?"

__________________________________________

When the week had finally come to a close, everyone bustled into the choir room excitedly. A few overachievers had already presented their final products, (namely Rachel), and finally it was Kurt's turn to present his video. He stepped forward to the front of the room and inserted his DVD into the laptop. He turned on the projector and pulled down the white screen in front of the chalk board.

"Now, as you all know I haven't been able to talk to Blaine in a week." Everyone in the room groaned. They had already had their fill of listening to Kurt's incessant complaints and his pleading to use their phones to contact Blaine.

"I really wanted to use him in my video, but since that was impossible, I had to use the next best thing. I got someone from the art department to help me illustrate my video, and convey this song in pictures. So, without further ado, I present to you, 'You'll Be In My Heart' from the movie Tarzan."

He pressed play and let the music video begin. The background music filled the room as the title and dedication appeared on the screen. "In dedication to Blaine Anderson, the best thing to ever happen to me."

Come, stop your crying it will be alright.

The first scene was of Kurt walking through a park, singing. He was looking directly into the camera, smiling that special smile that he only reserved for Blaine.

Just take my hand, hold it tight.

He held his outstretched hand to the camera, and then wrapped his other arm around a tree as he walked around it.

I will protect you from all around you,

I will be here, don't you cry.

He brought his index finger to his lips as if to silence the audience. Then he gave another smile, and pointed up to the tree. The camera moved up, shifting the focus away from Kurt and focusing on the tree. And then suddenly, a picture replaced it. A hand-drawn version of the same tree had appeared, and in it sat a drawing of a person that looked like Blaine. The animation was old-school, it seemed that the artist had drawn several copies of the same image and was flipping a notepad to get the movement across.

For one so small, you seem so strong.

Drawing-Blaine jumped down from the tree to a boy who was sitting under its shadows. The boy, who appeared to be an animated version of Kurt jumped in surprise but turned to hug Blaine.

My arms will hold you, keep you safe and warm.

This bond between us can't be broken,

I will be here don't you cry.

The two boys ran around in the park together, spinning around, chasing each other behind trees, occasionally getting a close-up of their shared glances.

Cause you'll be in my heart,

Yes, you'll be in my heart

From this day on, now and forever more.

You'll be in my heart

No matter what they say.

You'll be here in my heart, always

The two boys fell down on their backs and smiled at each other. One of them pointed to the sky, and the animation shifted to focus on the clouds which slowly turned into memories. The drawing-boys were running down a hall in uniforms, then the scene switched to the two drinking coffee, and then once more to the two sitting on a staircase with Blaine's arm around Kurt, as though trying to comfort him.

Why can't they understand the way we feel?

They just don't trust what they can't explain.

I know we're different, but deep inside us

We're not that different at all.

The scenes kept switching, focusing on different memories. The two animated boys were alone in a room, apparently singing to each other near a fireplace; then they were dancing in some warehouse with foam and bubbles flying everywhere; then they were walking down a hallway hand in hand.

And you'll be in my heart,

Yes, you'll be in my heart

From this day on,

Now and forever more.

Don't listen to them, cause what do they know?

At this point, the scenes turned just to drawing-Blaine, walking down a hallway with a crowd of students looking angrily at him; then the scene turned to him being pushed against a locker; then sitting alone in his room, upset.

We need each other, to have, to hold.

And out of nowhere, drawing-Kurt walked into the room snapping Blaine out of his bad memories, and he hugged him. The two boys began to slow dance, laughing.

They'll see in time, I know.

When destiny calls you, you must be strong.

I may not be with you, but you've got to hold on.

They'll see in time, I know.

We'll show them together,

Cause you'll be in my heart.

Another set of flashbacks followed. The two boys were getting ready for prom, the Warblers were standing in a circle singing to Kurt…

Believe me, you'll be in my heart.

I'll be there from this day on,

Now and forever more.

You'll be in my heart

No matter what they say.

The animation turned back into the clouds and then shifted down again to the two boys lying down on the grass. They looked at each other, smiled, and then took hold of each other's hands. Then, the animation slowly faded away into a video of Kurt standing next to the same tree and singing directly into the camera.

You'll be here in my heart,

Always.

The ending credits rolled on the screen and everyone clapped. Until—

"Art by David Karofsky?" Finn scoffed.

"What?" Puck said in indignation.

"Hold up, hold up – I know I have Karofsky on a leash with the Bully Whips, but…since when are you two buddies?" Santana asked.

The whole rest of Glee club exploded in questions and comments until finally Mr. Schuester calmed everyone down.

"I don't mean to echo everyone else's thoughts Kurt, but I am curious as to how you got Karofsky to do this animation for you, when the two of you aren't exactly on the best of terms." Mr. Schuester said, looking directly at Kurt.

"He apologized to me and offered to help me since I was looking for an art student." Kurt said simply.

"I didn't know he could draw…" Quinn said.

"Draw? I didn't know he had enough vocabulary to apologize." Tina said.

"Can we cut the questions? This isn't a cop show. He just helped me with my assignment, that was all. Who's next?" Kurt said, a sense of finality in his tone of voice.

Everyone in the room gave him a weary look, but no one said another word. Once everyone was done presenting, Kurt was the first to rush out of the room. He didn't want to deal with the questions or the doubt everyone was sure to have. He did admit, it was weird. He, himself, was quite surprised when Karofsky offered to draw for him, especially with his very apparent hate for both Kurt and Blaine. However, something in him seemed to have changed. Kurt couldn't tell what it was, but the violent glint in his eyes was gone, and though he had not seen him smile the last few days, he hadn't had any belligerent encounters either.

So when he rushed out of class looking for Karofsky to tell him the video was a great hit, he didn't expect things to turn around so quickly. He saw him standing next to his locker and approached him with a smile planted on his face.

"Hey, everyone loved your drawings! They really liked the video." Kurt said.

"What are you talking about, Hummel?" Karofsky asked, a look of disgust evident on his face.

Kurt blinked. Unsure of what was going on. "The drawings you made for me…you know, from the other day when you apologized?"

"Listen, fag," Karofsky growled as he closed in on Kurt, "I don't know what you're talking about. Leave me alone and don't talk to me again." And with that, he punched the locker and walked away. Kurt was left standing there in shock. What was going on?

Kurt watched walk away and noticed as a small piece of paper fell out of his pocket. He thought to call out to him again, but he didn't want another confrontation. After Karofsky had rounded the corner, he walked slowly to the crumpled up piece of paper and picked it up. His eyes scanned the paragraph written in messy handwriting, occasionally struggling to read smudged words beneath tear stains. His jaw dropped in horror, and he stood there paralyzed to his spot.

"Dear Dad,
I'm sorry that things had to end this way. I know you always wanted me to be this strong, incredible football player – but I don't know if I can be that anymore. It hurts to breathe every day that I have to put on this mask. I can't live with this disease that's eating me alive. And I can't bring myself to tell you the truth about it, because it would kill you. The only way to solve it is to kill what's inside of me instead. I'm sorry Dad. I just can't take it anymore. Please know this isn't your fault. I'm only sorry I couldn't be a better man. I'll miss you."

x x x

"Blaine, WAIT!" Kurt yelled, following after him. He watched as Blaine walked out of the front door and slammed it shut. His actions went unnoticed however. The music was far too loud and the others were far too busy singing and dancing to take note. Kurt left without anyone turning a head in his direction, but that didn't matter. All he wanted was to catch up to Blaine, to explain everything.

He saw Blaine turning the corner down the street and he ran to catch up.

"Blaine, PLEASE!" He shouted. Tears found their way to his eyes again as he leaned forward just enough to graze Blaine's hand.

"Don't touch me—" Blaine breathed, pulling away.

Kurt's face burned as if it had been slapped. He could feel the heat rising, but he blinked away the tears. "Blaine, please, you have to listen to me…It wasn't what you think!"

"I don't want to hear what you have to say Kurt. What I saw was enough." The disappointment hung on every word.

"Blaine, please. Didn't you hear what I was saying? I wasn't telling him—"

"STOP!" Blaine yelled. "Just stop—I don't want to know what you said to him Kurt. Haven't you done enough damage tonight?" And with the tears streaming down his face, he turned on his heel and walked off.


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