Dec. 19, 2011, 3:06 p.m.
Sketchy Relations: As Time Passes
E - Words: 4,449 - Last Updated: Dec 19, 2011 Story: Closed - Chapters: 21/? - Created: Aug 26, 2011 - Updated: Dec 19, 2011 1,837 0 18 0 0
Nick and Jeff were always around, making him laugh and smile so much that his mouth and lungs would ache from time to time. Wes and David were always available to offer advice or a comforting pat to his shoulder which he was slowly starting to accept without too much of a noticeable flinch.
Blaine however, was a whole different story. The hazel eyed boy had quickly become one of two of his best friends, the other being Nick of course. Sure there was nothing wrong with that, except for the fact that Kurt was pretty sure his feelings weren't as platonic as he would like. As they grew stronger so did his guilt. Blaine was the only other gay boy he knew that had ever been relatively nice to him. Wasn't it bad for him to feel this way for the first person who showed him attention? Did Blaine even have those feeling for Kurt in return, or was he simply being nice to the new student?
Kurt couldn't tell if the bright smiles and light blushes from Blaine were real or made up which was what scared him the most. What if all the 'little signs' and 'flirtatious actions' were things his desperate and overactive imagination concocted? What if all the hand holding and brief hugs were things Blaine did with everyone? When these questions circled around his thoughts at night as he stared up at the ceiling his head would ache along with his heart. Often he pushed the worries to the back of his mind to think about the previous day or something funny Jeff had said.
Surprisingly enough Kurt had made a few other friends in Dalton, and even one from McKinley. Mercedes had somehow gotten a hold of his number, which was probably Finn's fault, and had called to thank him for the advice he had given David. Apparently David really couldn't cook that well after all, causing a quick thinking Mercedes to prevent a house fire with a nearby extinguisher. Though the steak and potato's had been burned beyond recognition the girl told him that they had had an amazing time anyway. Kurt had thought that was going to be the one and only phone call from the girl but he had been wrong. She called every few days 'just to talk' and usually sent him a text or two throughout the day. Oddly enough he didn't mind, and having a female friend had its awards since they would talk about anything from clothes to the way boys acted. Though it seemed his new nickname to the girl was now 'boo', something of which he really didn't mind.
Halloween had been a big deal to his little group of friends. He didn't like the holiday at all since he had had enough of monsters for one life time. Somehow he had kept that part secret and had even helped the other boys make the Coffee Ranger outfits that Jeff insisted on. When they had noticed the absence of black material at Mercedes sewing machine it clicked. So after answering a few awkward questions and quickly assuring them he was more than happy to stay behind in his dorm room to get some other things done they had reluctantly agreed to go without him. When a knock at his door pulled him away from his sketchbook the night of the big party he thought it was Jeff having troubles with his belt like he had a few days earlier. He wasn't expecting to be pulled from his room and down the hall to have a movie night in Blaine's dorm room. To his relief the movies weren't scary in the least, just Harry Potter and The Never Ending Story was popped into the dvd player. He had yet again reassured them that he was fine alone and that they should go to the party Jeff had been chattering about for weeks, but the only reply they gave was that it wouldn't be much of a party without him.
His weekly meetings with Amanda were getting worse because she seemed to think the happy mood he came in with was an act he was using to 'cover up' his real feelings. Kurt had a few choice words to describe where she could put her 'feelings' but of course he just ignored her ramblings like all the other times. Usually by the end he was flustered and upset with something that had managed to slip through his wall, but Blaine and the others always knew what to say or do to make him feel better even though they didn't know that he was seeing a therapist. He had told them he had been working with one of his teachers to catch up with advanced work. He wasn't sure what other excuse he could use once they realized it didn't take more than a month to catch up.
The daily phone calls from his father were getting better with each one. Kurt found himself actually laughing and joking with the man, something he hadn't done in a long time. It was a relief to know that he, Carole and even Finn were getting along just fine. He couldn't deny the strange surge of jealousy that rolled across his body when his father would mention the other boy. Kurt of course couldn't stay angry at the tall teen for too long when he kept calling him every few days to talk. In fact Finn was the person he had just gotten off the phone with a few minutes before, the taller boy claiming they had a few minutes between classes.
He never really understood what clicked in Finn's mind that afternoon when he had found Karofsky doing…that to him in the janitor's closet. Before then he had basically ignored his existence but that really wasn't hard when Kurt himself stayed away from him and Carole like they had the plague. Once Finn found him and began to realize what had been going on, like his father and the rest of New Directions (thanks to Finn's big mouth) he had changed. He was constantly talking to him even though he didn't respond and even made an attempt to watch musicals every now and then. Kurt never had the heart to tell him to leave him alone because he knew the other boy was trying his hardest to give him comfort and understand.
Another cold wind blew across Kurt's face causing him to shiver and stray from his current thoughts. He pulled his jacket tighter around himself as he continued to walk across the sidewalk. Having a free period was something the junior enjoyed immensely since he could walk outside and enjoy the gardens and the time alone to think. The warning bell had just wrung which signaled that students only had a few minutes remaining to get to their classes if they had one that hour. A few students quickly passed him but soon there were no other students that he could see outside with him in the chilly November air.
Humming softly to himself he almost didn't notice a small flash of yellow to his side. Stopping on the sidewalk to investigate further he was surprised to see a few students with a small birdcage walking up to the school. They seemed to be arguing and the one actually holding the top loop of the iron cage didn't look like he minded that it was swinging back and forth wildly, causing the little yellow bird to twitter weakly in response.
"I can't believe the council makes us bring this thing to Warbler practice every day! It's such a hassle!" the taller boy exclaimed, stopping at a stone bench to place the cage down. The shorter boy seemed to give the yellow bird an annoyed look when it chirped again.
"Why did you have to bring it now?"
"Because if I didn't I would have to go all the way back to our room to grab the thing." the taller boy snapped back. He began to walk towards the building, the shorter one following afterwards.
"What about Pavarotti?"
"It's just a stupid bird! I'll pick him up after class so hurry up before we're late!"
Kurt watched them run into the warm building before looking back at the stone bench. He bit his bottom lip as he stepped off the sidewalk to walk towards the birdcage. It was so cold outside and he couldn't really understand why the other two would leave such a little bird out in it. As he got closer the bird began to look familiar and he tried to remember what kind it was. Kneeling down on the ground he frowned when the bird hardly gave him any attention as it tried to huddle in on itself for more warmth.
The loud banging echoed around the hall as Kurt pounded on the metal door of the locker he was currently stuffed in. Karofsky and a few other football players had dragged him into the gym's dressing room earlier and had apparently found it amusing to see how many of them it would take to force him into one. He was sure he had been stuck in the smelly thing for a few hours so when he heard the door to the locker room open he began to hit the door harder, calling out desperately for someone to help him.
"It's just the stupid fag."
Kurt pleaded more when a few kicks were delivered to the locker door, but not one of them let him out. Coach Tanaka had been the one to find him and shoo him out, not giving his bruised eye a second look.
Kurt sighed and shook his head to rid it of the nasty memory. He looked at the little bird with a sad smile. "I don't think you're stupid." he whispered before standing up to pull his bag from his shoulder, placing it on the stone bench next to the cage before pulling off the jacket he had pulled over his blazer before his walk. "It's not much, but at least the wind can't get you." he said softly as he wrapped the jacket around the cage. After slipping the shoulder strap of his bag over his shoulder again he carefully picked up the birdcage. He felt his teeth clattering together as he looked towards the school, coming to the conclusion that it was too risky to go through the main entrance. If the other two saw him with their bird they might demand him to give Pavarotti back which was something Kurt really didn't want to do.
Turning on his heel he began to walk around the main building so he could enter through the less popular side door. He had to get to the Warbler's room, that much he knew for sure. He had never seen the little bird the few times he had tagged along with Blaine or the others but he knew if the bird belonged to the group they should at least know the poor thing had almost froze to death. As he turned the corner he was met with a sight he had never seen before, even more amazing was the fact that a bouncy blonde wasn't with him like normal.
Nick was leaning against the brick wall close to the door with his head tilted back facing the sky. A small frown lined the junior's lips and it looked like the balled up fists at his sides were shaking slightly. Kurt couldn't tell if Nick's face was red from the wind that kept blowing or if he really was as angry as he looked. He slowed his steps as he neared him, watching the shorter teen closely. He really loved Nick as a friend and would help him any way he could, but he was still scared that maybe the other would snap like Karofsky had done so many times when he had been angry. Licking his chapped lips nervously as he stopped a good ten or twelve feet away from Nick, he finally called out to his friend. "Nick?"
Nick jumped in surprise, his head snapping in the direction of Kurt's soft spoken words. "Kurt…" he whispered, placing his hand over his hammering heart. "Good lord you scared the hell out of me." he said, smiling when Kurt looked down guiltily.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to." Kurt replied quickly, pulling his eyes from the ground to look over Nick again. "Are you alright?" he asked worriedly, noticing how Nick unclenched then re-clenched his fists.
Nick took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. It wouldn't do any good to take his anger out on poor Kurt who was only worried about him. "I'm fine, a teacher just really pissed me off." he said quietly, finally noticing that the other junior was holding something odd and was outside without a jacket. "Are you crazy?" he began, opening the door for Kurt to walk through. "You are going to catch a cold walking outside without a jacket."
Kurt remained silent as he walked in, thankful as a warm gush of air washed across his body. He smiled when Pavarotti chirped loudly as if he was voicing his own opinion about being in the warmth once again. This seemed to get Nick's attention who was staring at the jacket covered bird cage with open curiosity.
"Kurt….why do you have Pavarotti?" Nick finally asked, watching as Kurt slowly unwrapped the jacket from around the cage. The little bird hopped around on its perch slightly before twittering again.
"I…I stole him." Kurt explained softly, continuing when Nick gave him a wide-eyed look. "N-No! I mean…" he sputtered before sighing and taking a deep breath so he could explain. "The boy who had him left him in the courtyard…and I remembered that birds don't like the cold and I didn't want him to die so I just took him, I know it was wrong I sh-"
"Kurt, calm down, it's okay." Nick interrupted quickly reaching out to touch Kurt's arm. The teen hardly flinched and the shorter junior would of mentally cheered if his mind wasn't already reeling, trying to remember who the newest member of the warblers were. His brow furrowed when a blurry face resurfaced in his mind, a name not attached.
"Does Pavarotti belong to the Warblers?" Kurt asked quietly, lifting the cage to his face to smile at the yellow bird who seemed to tweet back at him as if he were greeting him.
"Yeah." Nick answered, smiling as he watched Kurt smile at the warbler. "Come on, we have to bring him to the practice room. At least he'll be safe and warm in there until I can tell Wes, David and the rest of the senior council." he said before leading Kurt through the hallways of Dalton.
Kurt followed quietly, carefully carrying the cage by the loop on top it. He still didn't know why Nick was so angry, but he was scared to ask. Was it really any of his business? Should he just ignore the stressed out look that now crossed his friend's face? A few more steps seemed to give Kurt a bit of courage. "Nick, are you sure you're okay?" he watched Nick's shoulders tense and slowed down to give the other teen room.
"I'm fine Kurt, I just can't control my temper sometimes." Nick began softly, turning the corner to lead the other junior down another hallway. "I yelled at the teacher then walked out. Now I'm pretty sure I have a mark for detention meaning I wont be able to make it to Warbler practice."
Kurt looked down to Pavarotti as he thought for a few moments. "I'm sorry." he said softly, lengthening his strides to where he now walked beside the shorter boy. "What did the teacher do?"
Nick snorted in laughter before running a hand through his hair and down his face as they continued walking. "He marked my paper wrong and wouldn't look over it again to correct his mistake." Nick explained before shaking his head slightly. "I over reacted to it when I shouldn't have." he glanced to Kurt, giving him a sad smile when Kurt looked back at him. "I used to be worse though, like the slightest thing that ticked me off would end up in me throwing chairs across the room or at other people." he whispered, laughing when Kurt gave him a disbelieving look. "I swear."
"How…did you get some of it under control?" Kurt asked, walking through the large wooden doors to the practice room. It was empty of course due to the members being in classes, well besides Nick who was currently skipping. He noticed the piano in the corner of the room and smiled before walking over to set Pavarotti on the bench in front of it before turning to face his friend again.
Nick smiled, a light blush forming on his cheeks. "A stubborn blond who didn't seem to catch the hint that I didn't want anything to do with him began to calm me down." he explained in a soft voice. "Whenever he would notice me getting to the point of one of my fits he would hold me until I calmed down, no matter how much I screamed at him." Nick looked away from Kurt's understanding expression. "I still really don't know what Jeff ever saw in me back then, I was so messed up…"
Kurt dropped his bag to the floor before answering. "People say love can do crazy things." he whispered, another smile gracing his lips when Nick looked him in the eye once again. "It can look past simple things like anger to see who the person really is on the inside, at least its what I always thought it did."
Nick swallowed the large lump in his throat before nodding. "I'm going to go in the other room to see if I can find some birdseed for Pavarotti." he said, turning and walking across the room to where another door led to a little room on the side. Once he was out of eyeshot he sighed and rubbed at his face. He would never understand how Kurt had remained so sweet and kind with everything that had happened to him.
He had yet to tell Blaine or the others what he had found out about Kurt. A part of him really wanted to, but then he knew it wasn't his story to tell even though he knew it would probably make things easier in the long run. So for the past month he had made sure to be with Kurt most of the time to prevent Blaine from being alone with him. He knew it annoyed the senior to no end every time he included himself on their outings to the coffee shop or other things like movie nights, but he couldn't let the eager prefect scare Kurt even more than he was.
Despite his efforts the two seemed to be getting closer to each other each passing day, meaning either Nick himself had to tell Blaine or Kurt would have to by himself. What if he was pushed too hard though and was turned off from the senior before Blaine even had the chance to understand? Was Kurt ready to explain everything or would he just run away?
Nick sighed and walked over to the tall cabinet in the little room to look for birdseed, a clearing throat scaring him and causing him to jump a few feet in the air. He whirled around, placing his hand over his chest once he saw who it was. How many people were going to sneak up on him today?
"Wes?"
Kurt turned back towards Pavarotti when Nick left the room. "It's hard to believe he used to get that angry." he whispered to the bird who chirped back, hopping around on his perch once more. Kurt smiled before sitting on the bench beside the cage before looking over the piano. "My mother loved her piano…" he continued to whisper just incase Nick walked back in sooner than he expected. Who knows what the other would think if he caught Kurt talking to the bird.
"Daddy?" Kurt asked as he stood in the doorway, clad in pajama's with a teddy bear hanging from his hand.
"Go back to bed bud." Burt told his ten-year-old son before turning back to the man he was talking to.
Kurt turned to do as he was told until the unmistakable sound of a piano filled the air. His eyes widened as he whirled around to face his father again. He walked out onto the dewy lawn to look and gasped as his mothers white piano stared back at him. "Daddy! Why is Momma's piano outside?" he asked in a panicked voice. "It'll get hurt!"
A pained expression flitted across Burt's face before he walked up to his son, kneeling down so that he was on the same level as the little boy. "We are giving Momma's piano to this nice man." he said, regretting his words once large tears slipped down Kurt's pale cheeks.
"You can't daddy! Momma loved her piano and said I could have it!" Kurt yelled, trying to side step his father to run towards the truck that the piano was now being lifted in to. His father quickly caught him and lifted him in his arms despite his kicking and yelling.
"Kurt stop." Burt begged in a broken voice. "This will be better for us, she wouldn't want us to get sad every time I-…we look at it." he explained before walking back towards the house, still carrying a sobbing Kurt.
Kurt shook his head quickly looking back at Pavarotti who seemed to be watching him, tilting his head from side to side. "I miss it." he said, running his fingers over the white keys of the piano. Maybe he actually didn't miss the piano itself, but his mother who had taught him how to play so many years ago. "She always played the same thing everyday, but Dad wouldn't let them play it at her funeral." he whispered before smiling sadly.
Before he knew it he was pressing down on the keys, humming along to the opening like his mother had always done when he was younger.
For a break that would make it okay
There's always some reason to feel not good enough
And it's hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction, oh beautiful release
Memories seep from my veins
Let me be empty oh weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight~
He continued to sing and play even as he blinked back the tears that threatened to fall. He knew he shouldn't cry at this song anymore, knew that it had been long enough that he should be over it. He just couldn't help the way his heart tightened and the way his stomach flip flopped as he thought back to her.
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You're in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort here~
Kurt noticed the tears rolling down his cheeks now but didn't stop playing to wipe them away. The least he could do was finish the song he hadn't heard his mother play for him in years. So wrapped up in the song he didn't even see Nick and Wes standing in the doorway that led to the other room. Wes's jaw was dropped as he listened and Nick watched with wide eyes.
There's vultures and thieves at your back
The storm keeps on twisting
You keep on building the lies
That you make up for all that you lack
It don't make no difference
Escaping one last time
It's easier to believe
In this sweet madness oh this glorious sadness
That brings me to my knees~
Pavarotti began to tweet along with him, causing Kurt to give a sad smile. It was like the little bird was trying to comfort him with his own voice and it made the ache in his heart lessen slightly.
Fly away from here
From this cold dark hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You're in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort here
You're in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort here~
Kurt sniffled as he finished the rest of the song on the piano. He pulled his hands from the keys to wipe his face off, laughing softly when Pavarotti flapped his wings slightly. "You have a beautiful voice." he whispered to the bird, jumping when loud clapping sounded behind him. He turned in his seat on the bench, a worried look crossing his face as he realized that Wes and Nick were the ones who were cheering him on.
"I…" he began, not sure how he was going to explain why he thought it was okay to use their piano, but was quickly cut off when he tried to speak again.
"Kurt you have to audition for the warblers!" Wes said excitedly before striding up to the junior. "You have amazing range!" he continued, practically bouncing on the balls of his feet in excitement which reminded Kurt of a certain blond. "You would be accepted in a heart beat once they heard you sing."
Kurt's face flushed before he looked away, not noticing the worried look Nick was giving him. "I don't know Wes, I have never performed in front of anyone." he said softly, knowing it was a lie. He had sang in front of his mother plenty of times when he was younger, and the mirror but he was sure they didn't count.
"Nonsense, you'll be amazing, just let me go set up a time for you to audition." Wes said before scurrying off, Nick on his heels.
"Wes, wait! What if he doesn-"
Nick's voice was cut off as they entered the other room once again, leaving Kurt alone with Pavarotti. He turned towards the bird again and sighed as it twittered back at him. "What have I gotten myself into this time?"
Preview:"Wes, I really don't think I can do this…"
"You'll be great Kurt, besides do you really want Pavarotti to go back to that sophmore?"
"No…"
Comments
I get all teary eyes too when it comes to that song :)
Ack, I got all tear-eyed here. I want Kurt to sing this in canon now.
I ALWAYS CRY WHEN I LISTEN TO THIS SONG! It's just so, so, so beautiful and it reminds me of Buffy and my teen years :) but yeah, apart from that: loved the chapter and I need more!!! =))) xxxx
Thank you!
Oh I have been checking ever day for an update to this one! I love any fic where the Warblers just happen to discover Kurt's amazing voice because they stumble upon him singing. Love their shock and amazement! Will be looking forward to the next chapter!
Thank you!
:D!
Thanks for posting :) Love the story! :D Cant wait for the next one
Thank you! :)
it's a pretty song and it can never be over done, i'm glade you have Pavarotti in it, the bird would be good for Kurt. and still love this story
Don't worry there will be Klaine talking next chapter. :D
I think it would be great to have some Blaine/Kurt talk in the next chapter(s). I love the halloween outfits. And I love how Wes tries to convince Kurt in the next chapter to join the Warblers.
Hi! This is a really cute story (except for the scary parts, and those are really scary), I am looking forward to more :) Just one suggestion, a technicality really, I hope I won't offend you - it's just that you write "hazel" and "glasz" eyes a lot. You are right, both of them are too pretty to be true, but we already know that :D It might be only me, but it kind of snaps me out of the story every time :P Anyway, looking forward to Warbler Kurt!
It didn't offend me at all! Thank you for pointing that out to me. I've actually been planning on going back and editing the heck out of this fic, but things get in the way. So this is just something that can be added to my list to check for when I actually do. I'll be more aware of it now that's for sure ;) Thanks again for taking the time to review and read~! :D
WRITE MORE! Omg I am soo in love with this.
Thank you for reviewing~! :)
MEGUSTA~ I seriously cannot wait for Blaine's reaction to Kurt singing! so, when can we expect the next update? soon pretty please!
Thanks for reading! I plan on updating by Tuesday, but it's not set in stone. :)