He’s not really sure what had woken him up. One second, he was dreaming about scarves, types of fabrics, red pipes, and other Dalton couture features; the next, it had all vanished away letting place to some strange sensation that had overwhelmed all his body. He was hot. Yes, that was it. He was uncannily hot when most of the time, he had woken up freezing in his big single bed. The covers were pushed to the edge of the bed. His whole body was shaking and shivering, but strangest of all, he was hot too. If he had been a bit more awake, Kurt could have processed this information a bit further, but really, in his semi-conscious state, he didn’t have the presence of mind to dig further. He only knew that it felt good, very good in fact, especially in the lower body area. Right down below his stomach, it felt like heaven.
Maybe it was just another dream. Maybe he was having an inception kind of dream. Yes, Kurt Hummel had seen inception and truth to be told, he hadn’t understood a lot of it. He just went mostly for the excellent casting; talented actors, doing talented stuff, looking as talented as hell.
Talent. Why was he thinking about talent right now? His mind really wasn’t processing anything. He was really trying to keep a logical train of thought but something wasn’t really letting him concentrate. God, that damn feeling on his thighs felt good. He never knew dreams could be so powerful. Oh sure, he’d had a lot of sexual dreams over the years, not that he would confess it to anybody except for maybe some of his ex-lovers or whatever you would call your one night stands. They knew but then again, it was at his advantage. Generally, he would lie and say that his bright morning hard on was nothing more than what was left of a torrid sex dream he’d had about them. It was mostly a big fat lie because in no universe could Kurt dream about those guys. Let’s face it, when he picked them up, he was way too trashed to even remember their faces. The morning often held big surprises.
Even drunk, he knew how to choose them. It wasn’t about the face but the ass, the level of horniness, and amount of alcohol in their system. Drunken sex is always the best as long as they didn’t pass out.
Damn, he had forgotten his point again. It’s not his fault. He felt damn good, like when one of the guys felt so honored of being dreamt about that he would honor him back with a morning blowjob. The same warmth on his under belly, those shivers that enveloped his whole body, the weight on his cock, the suction was exactly the same, except way more talented. It was talented like only some people were, like only…

“Holy fucking mother of…. Blaaaaaaaine!”

As his whole body jerked out in sudden pleasure and his eyes popped out of their sockets, Kurt’s mind finally came to the inevitable conclusion his body has acknowledged quite some time ago: Blaine’s talented mouth was sucking his cock and it had never felt so good.

Surely enough, once Kurt opened his eyes, he could see the gorgeous face of Blaine buried between his legs, his perfect pink swollen lips around the head of his cock, his tongue swirling against the skin, tracing the shape of it veins, swallowing what Kurt was giving him. Finally, he saw those eyes, those once hazel turned almost black with lust eyes, looking at him, laughing at him, and loving him all at the same time. Kurt whimpered, causing Blaine to chuckle. He meant it as just a chuckle, but all Kurt could feel was the sudden vibration around his cock that made him shiver even more from head to toe and sent his hips flying in search for that wonderful, warm cavern that was Blaine’s mouth. His whole body, his mind or lack of only wanted on thing at this point: to fuck this beautiful mouth until he came hard and long, to abuse Blaine’s mouth that would just take it and let himself be fucked hard in the mouth. Oh dear, it would feel perfect. The plan was perfect.

Only it was just a plan. Somewhere, long lost in Kurt’s mind, there was a voice that kept telling him that it was a very bad plan and that the point of starting again was not to go rough on Blaine. He tried to make that thought predominant but he could only think of Blaine and his damn mouth.
He couldn’t do it, though. He couldn’t begin to thrust into Blaine’s mouth, as much as he and his whole body craved to, because a lot happened all at once. Thinking about it later on, it was really more hilarious than anything else. At the moment though, Kurt didn’t find it something to laugh about.
As soon as Kurt’s hips jerked forward, Blaine, who wasn’t expecting it and had forgotten to put his hands on Kurt’s hips due to his previous unconscious state, almost choked. Kurt’s cock reached the back of his throat and Blaine, now fully aware of his gag reflex, reacted violently. His mouth suddenly closed on Kurt’s length, his teeth piercing through the thin and over-sensitive skin, clasping hard once before releasing as suddenly. A loud noise followed; a growling so loud that he could have woken the whole building. The strangest thing was that the noise wasn’t coming from either of their mouths since one was busy profaning insanities and the other was not quite over the cock completely.

In retrospect, the noise had come after the biting and the noise was really nothing more than Blaine’s stomach begging to be fed, as if that would make it any less peculiar when they would come back to it later and think about it. When it happened, neither of them was really in the mood for analyzing any of what had happened. Kurt had reacted in the only way his body wanted him to, the only way he could. He’d just thrown a kick at Blaine, sending him flying off the bed and landing on the hard cold floor against the night stand. The other man wouldn’t blame him if he were able to talk over the profanities coming from Kurt’s mouth.

“Oh Fuck! Fuck! What the hell did you fucking do to me, Blaine? What the fucking hell went through your stupid mind? What the… Fuck, Fuuuuuck, it hurts!”

Kurt was now holding his dick, massaging it, his whole body bent between his legs, his head pounding the mattress. In any other context, it would have been incredibly kinky to see what Kurt could do with his body. In any other context, Blaine would have lost all trains of thought and simply drooled at his boyfriend’s flexibility. A lot of questions begged to be asked about this exact position, but that would have to be another time when Blaine hadn’t just bit (he still couldn’t believe it) Kurt’s cock and said man wasn’t screaming at him like he was the devil on earth. Nope, such a sight wasn’t turning on Blaine. Not at all.

If there was any chance that Blaine could be turned on, Kurt was making sure it wouldn’t last. The level of his screaming was starting to scare Blaine to be honest, not because he thought that Kurt was in immense pain, but more because he was scared of what Kurt might do to him once he recovers.

Kurt’s head raised and his eyes met Blaine’s for the first time since the “accident”. Blaine slowly stood up and backed against the wall, eyes never back on the ground. Cornered, he raised his eyes once again and it felt like time stopped for a couple of seconds. The way they looked at each other, nothing could explain it. Kurt was breathing hard and the way he looked at Blaine was like a bull ready to charge. One would think that Blaine would start apologizing or begging for forgiveness or crawling at the other man’s feet. After all that happened, he should have been more than aware of Kurt’s temper. If Kurt was anything, it was a straight up bitch.
Oh, Blaine was aware but for the life of him, he couldn’t explain his last move, or sound that is.

Time started again, 2 seconds passed, and much at Kurt’s astonishment, Blaine started laughing.

“Blaine….” Kurt wasn’t mad anymore.

He was too surprised by the turn of the events to be mad. Actually, though he would never admit it even under torture, he was kind of amused himself. Thinking about it, the whole situation was so peculiar, so absurd that he wasn’t even sure it had happened. Only his aching cock and the tiny marks from Blaine’s teeth were there to remind him otherwise. Oh yeah, he was mad. Marking someone had a totally new meaning for him. He had to keep giving his bitch look to Blaine but truth to be told, it was pointless since Blaine was so hilariously gone that he had slipped on the floor and was holding his sides, in pain from laughing so hard.

“I’m… I’m sorry… so… so... so-so-sorry… K-Kurt…” Blaine tried to say between fits of laughter. Great, now he was even tearing up.

“Are you fucking serious right now, Blaine? Are you seriously laughing when you just mistook my cock for a snack?” Kurt asked incredulously.

Blaine seemed to calm down for a second, just long enough to get something out.
“No, but Kurt, I’m laughing at my own…. God, do you realize, I almost choked and then my stomach cried in hunger, and I bite your cock….?” And the man was gone again.

Only then did it hit Kurt. He understood that the horrible growl he heard was actually Blaine’s stomach begging for food and that it actually happened before Blaine had bitten him. Basically, as ridiculous as it sounded, Blaine almost gagged on Kurt’s cock but in some bizarre way, by some strange functionality in Blaine’s body, his stomach was the one to react and beg for something else to eat other than cock. Kurt wasn’t even sure that gagging and craving food were compatible like that, but he guessed that Blaine wasn’t normal.

Basically, Blaine’s stomach couldn’t refrain itself and made him dig into the only thing available, Kurt’s cock.

Once the realization sunk into Kurt’s brain, there was no restraint anymore. One second, his eyes were popping out of their sockets; the next, he was face first on the mattress, his laughter barely muffled.
It took more than 15 minutes for the two men to calm themselves again and it didn’t help that every time they looked at each other, they would go for another long fit. Eventually the laughter started to die down, albeit some giggles here and there, but neither of them had actually has something in between. Even when all there was left was big toothy smiles on their faces, neither spoke. They just kept looking at each other while Blaine raised himself from the floor and came to sit carefully on the edge of the bed and started massaging his back. Apparently, the fall had done quite some damage.

Kurt only raised a cocky eyebrow, still grinning, like he meant that Blaine had deserved it. Blaine smiled back, a little sheepishly this time, lightly blushing and lowered his head slowly, caught in the wrong.
“I have no idea what happened just now, Blaine, but let’s be clear. If it ever happens again, I will pull out your teeth one by one and I’ll make sure you’ll need a straw to feed yourself for the rest of your life.” Kurt said finally.

Blaine raised his head but he could only see the amusement in Kurt’s eyes and without missing a beat, he nodded violently. Kurt seemed to think that was enough. He stood up from the bed, and went for the door, leaving a confused Blaine behind. As he reached it, he turned back, raising a perfect eyebrow.

“Are you coming or what? I think it’s best to feed you before that monster you call a stomach eats me whole alive next time, god forbid” He walked out.

Blaine was so astonished that he forgot for a second that he was supposed to follow him. He had expected everything from being thrown out of the apartment to being emasculated by Kurt but never in a million years, would he have expected that and only that.

As he finally came out of his surprise and went to look for Kurt, he had only a thought in mind. Gosh, Kurt would never fail to surprise him.
He was in for a long bumpy road, roller coasters of emotions and surprises and he wanted to ride every single mother fucking one of them.
The sight that welcomed Blaine once he got out of the room could only be described in one word: epic. Or glorious, he supposed. Kurt was walking around the living room naked, his perfectly shaped butt facing Blaine, exposed in all its glory when the man would bend to pick up something from the floor since the area was pretty much still damaged. Kurt was skipping and jumping in order to not stab himself with all the glass on the floor like a fucking naked ballerina, just as gracious but so much more obscene. It was like a porn movie happening in front of Blaine’s eyes.
Suddenly, he started thinking of Lisa very strongly, trying to picture her naked in bed. He was trying to remember Finn’s mailman theory, but he could only picture the hot mailman back home in the bed with him and Kurt. Yeah, not such a good idea and apparently, he wasn’t the only one to notice.

“You can lower that flag right now, Mister. Little Blaine is not getting any for a long time.” Kurt had turned to stare at him, an evil grin on his face.

Even worse, Kurt was giving him his come hither eyes and Blaine knew that there was no way that he would ever consider having sex right now. He could still see the mark of his own teeth on Kurt’s… Damn it, Anderson, stop staring!

Kurt followed his eyes, and kept smirking as Blaine’s bothered attitude. He was actually having a lot of fun seeing Blaine try his best at controlling his now throbbing erection and failing miserably. An eye for an eye; a cock for a cock.

“That’s what you get for messing with me, Anderson,” laughed Kurt before going back to the room to put some of his clothes back on in an obscene shake of hips and ass.

Never mind what he said, that was one damn roller coaster Blaine was more than ready to get down off of.

Once Kurt came back clothed in his briefs and a long tee shirt, Blaine had finally managed to calm down. He had the plaid of the couch against his waist, and he was leaning against it, finally breathing normally. Kurt looked at him, a questioning look on his face.

“You took care of that little job, Anderson? That was fast.”

“Well, I’ve discovered over the years that thinking about my wife’s friends in French lingerie and imitating a catwalk was the best turn off ever.”
Kurt let out a surprised giggle.

“Don’t ask.” Blaine continued quickly. “Let’s just say that since that day, I’ve never come home before calling first checking if the coast was clear”.

“I bet you did,” laughed Kurt.
He sighed then and went to kiss a surprised Blaine quickly on the cheek.

“I guess with all the drama this morning, I couldn’t give you a proper good morning kiss.” He admitted a little sheepishly.

Blaine quickly recovered from his surprise at Kurt’s shy little gesture and he couldn’t take any more of his cuteness. He enveloped the man into a hug and dropped a small kiss in the crook of his neck.

“Good morning to you too, or should I say good night? You do realize it’s actually midnight, right?”

“I guess that’s what you get when you go to sleep in the middle of the afternoon,” sighed Kurt, dismantling himself from Blaine’s embrace.

He hadn’t completely forgiven him or maybe he had and just wanted to be a bitch about it. He had only kissed him first because as much as he wanted to be mad at him, he couldn’t resist the man for too long. Blaine knew that too well. His little smile said it all.

“I believe you promised me a meal?” Blaine smirked.

“Come on, you giant monster. Let’s feed you.”

“Kurt, you should probably wear slippers or something. You might hurt yourself with all the debris.”

“No, it’s ok. I’m being careful. It actually reminds me of that scene from Mr. and Mrs. Smith. When they destroy the whole house and then have sex. It’s basically the same situation when you think about it.”

“Only I get to play Angelina Jolie.” Blaine said back with a wide smile.

Suddenly, Kurt forgot all about the food he was looking for in the fridge. He turned to look at Blaine and he was 17 again, forgetting their fight, their separation, everything. Blaine somehow had the same expression he had worn 8 years ago, only 100 times more powerful. All he could see now was not only the love he wore, but also the regrets. He had a lot to regret since then. It wasn’t about serenading a random guy at the Gap anymore. Blaine was blaming himself for so much more, nothing a dead bird could fix, and yet Kurt wasn’t seeing it this way. When he looked at Blaine like that, all those things didn’t matter, he realized. He just saw the man he loved and had always loved, no matter his flaws, no matter what had happened between them. At this precise moment, maybe so much stronger than all his previous realizations, it hit him like a ton of bricks. He would never be able to blame Blaine. Not then, not now. His flaws only made him love Blaine more and more. Why pretend be mad at him when he never really could be? Why waste time at games and shenanigans and pretending and making people hurt just for his own pleasure? It wasn’t worth it, not when Blaine was looking at him like that.

Kurt didn’t need to talk to Blaine to see that they were thinking the same thing. Not exactly the same thing, but just of the memory. When Kurt would answer, just like back then, Blaine would know that it would be ok. Nothing had changed or actually, it had changed but into something more. They had never been able to define it at that moment back then and they couldn’t now either. It was just the future and the future sounded fine.

“Deal.”

He didn’t need to look back to know that Blaine was smiling. He just knew so he kept looking for the bottle of juice. It would be fine one way or the other.
Kurt had finally managed to dig something out of the freezer and had put the macaroni and cheese into the oven for it to warm. In the meantime, they had both taken a glass of juice from the very few that were not broken and had settled themselves on the couch. Blaine changed into shorts and tee shirt snuggled on Kurt’s side. They were comfortable and waiting but mostly, they were everything but tired.

“I have a few ideas how to tire us out so we could go back to sleep,” proposed Blaine, his head resting against Kurt, who was playing lazily with his curls.
Blaine loved the feeling of Kurt’s hand on his hair and it sent a shiver down his spine. He could only think again of one thing.

“Don’t even think about it Blaine. Don’t even. I’m still deeply marked and I mean that both literally and figuratively, thank you very much.”

“I’m sorry, Kurt. I really am.”

“Shh. It’s ok. I told you. I just don’t understand how that could even happen. When people gag, they actually open their mouth wide, not snap them shut,” chuckled Kurt.

“What can I say? I’m a freak of nature.” Blaine answered shyly, raising his head to look at Kurt.
Kurt let out a short laugh before quickly pecking Blaine on the noise.

“Yes, but it’s ok because you’re my freak.”
Blaine smiled widely and rested his head back on Kurt’s chest, humming contentedly just like a small kitty. Kurt couldn’t help laughing and tightening his grip around the man. God, he never wanted to leave that spot again.

“I wish I could just sleep here, if only I could sleep,” sighed Kurt.

“I’m sorry for waking you up. I thought we would… and you know be tired enough for…”

“I know, Blaine. It’s ok. We wouldn’t have slept a lot more in any case. Damn, we should have predicted it would turn out like this.”

“I don’t think we predicted a lot of what happened a few hours ago.”

“No, you’re right,” agreed Kurt.

“We didn’t have a chance to talk about it, Kurt. How do you feel about it?”

Suddenly Blaine had stood straighter and was no longer in Kurt’s arms. He leaned against the arm of the couch and brought his knees to his chest. He was so much more serious than before. Kurt didn’t know what had brought this up suddenly but before he could ask or even try to answer Blaine’s question, the timer of the oven started beeping. He looked toward the kitchen, then back at Blaine, then back at the kitchen before Blaine chuckled and took him by the arm.

“It’s ok. I won’t go anywhere. Just go take out the food or it will burn. We can’t have that, can we? “

“God, no. I think that the only thing there is left to do to this place is for someone to burn it down. I’ll be right back.” Kurt hurried out to the kitchen, skipping and jumping like he was afraid Blaine might disappear if he didn’t came back quickly enough.

Blaine never would, though. He didn’t want to scare Kurt like that but he needed them to talk. He didn’t regret last night at all and he wanted to make sure Kurt didn’t either. Personally, he had never felt more alive, even more than their first time together. It was something else entirely. Their first time was perfect but it was perfect back then, when it was still new and fresh and life hadn’t made things so complicated. Yes, they had been through a lot at the time and yes, the fact that they had found each other in such an environment made it so powerful. What made last night was something else entirely. It was the fact that life had thrown so much more at them in the meantime, every challenge possible and when all was said and done, it still felt like the most right thing in the world.
Yes, it was maybe only sex but as they said, when you truly connect with someone in that pure moment of joy and pleasure, you lose your fear of death. A man in love doesn’t fear death. Blaine didn’t fear death or the future. Nothing had restrained him at that moment. Nothing else mattered. It could seem so clich�, so cheesy, but truth to be told, not a single other thought went through his mind that night except for his love for Kurt. If that wasn’t an assurance of how they were meant to be together then just condemn him now because he had no other idea how to convince the crowd.
He could shout it on the top of….. oh wait a second!

“I have a fucking genius idea!”

Maybe he had the best idea, but just to be on the same page again, let it be said again that Blaine Anderson doesn’t have the best timing. Far from it and that often hits Kurt.
Literally, hit him hard like when he hit his head against the door of the oven because Blaine had thought that the perfect moment to deliver his idea was to burst running into the kitchen and startle your lover by shouting unexpectedly while the other man had his head into the oven trying to pull out a plate of hot macaroni and cheese. Timing, Blainers, timing. It was everything in life.
Kurt seemed to agree.

“Fuck! It hurts!” Kurt shouted, massaging his head.

The plate was still half out of the oven but he had forgotten completely about it. Instead he was looking at a sheepish Blaine with what he meant as his best bitch glare but once again the affect was oh so reduced by the fact that his brain seemed to have melted a bit. Damn, that thing was hot!

“I’m sorry, Kurt, I really am!” Blaine tried to apologize, blushing.

“Why? Just tell me why,” moaned Kurt in pain. Blaine went to the freezer and pulled out a pack of ice that Kurt put on his head. “Do you want to kill me? Is that it? Or do you simply enjoy torturing me slowly?”

Blaine stayed silent but threw him his famous puppy apologetic eyes and Kurt melted a little more. Damn that man! He was too cute, especially when he was like that; shy, blushing, standing awkwardly, fidgeting all over the place. How could one stay mad when he was being so cute? He made life so much more unexpected, so full of surprises.

There was never a dull moment with this one. Just like that, Kurt realized that he had missed Blaine so much. Before him and between him, his life was dull and meaningless and boring. He brought some life back with him; all the life and light Kurt had been missing all those years. That was the reason Kurt would never regret what had happened between them those few days and that night. He had never felt more alive.
Despite the pain on his skull, he smiled.

Blaine didn’t notice the smile right away because he was trying to get the rest of the plate out but once it was safely on the counter, he turned to see that Kurt was now seated and was looking at him with a loving look on his face. Blaine’s eyebrows shot up for a second at the sudden change but his whole face relaxed and he smiled back at Kurt.

“You’re impossible,” but the way Kurt said it, it just leaked of tenderness and more than a bit of teasing. “You’re like that cop in that movie, always at the wrong place at the wrong moment.”

“That’s Officer McClain and it’s in Die Hard.” Blaine responded, taking a chair next to Kurt.

“If you say so. Willis stopped being interesting once he lost all his hair.”

“I know you always love yourself a good handful of hair,” laughed Blaine, rubbing his head against Kurt’s chest.

“Oh my god. You’re a puppy, Blaine!” He patted Blaine’s hair nonetheless. Yes, he loved it, every curl of it.

Blaine let out a small yap to prove the point before shaking his head, his wild curls flying everywhere. Kurt burst into laughter. Mission accomplished.

“So, not to be annoying or anything, but forgive me for being skeptic about this genius idea of yours.”

Kurt almost immediately regretted going back to the original topic because it was like someone had switched a light switch inside Blaine, one that would make him go once again completely restless and giddy. It’s like he was dying to propose his idea to Kurt like it would win the fucking Nobel prize or something. Kurt would have really liked to have had some warning before being pulled to his feet by an over-excited Blaine and pushed straight into the living room. Blaine was on his tails after grabbing the plate and two forks.

“Blaine, just tell me what it is already!” Kurt huffed.

“You should wear some sweatpants, and… yes, a jacket. It’s kind of cold out there.” Blaine was already gone, vanished into their room to retrieve what he had just mentioned, not giving a minute for Kurt to express himself. Kurt he had a lot to say.

“BLAIIIINE! Wait a second! Out there? Where out there? Where are you taking me? I’m warning you, Mister, I’m not going anywhere on a Wednesday night at 1:30am with you! BLAAAINE, come the fuck back here!”

Blaine just took his time, not really caring about Kurt delivering his rant in the living room. When he finally emerged, he was clothed in sweat pants and a Dalton Hoodie and carrying some clothes for Kurt as well. What struck Kurt even more and shut him up for a moment was that he was dragging behind him the bed covers and some pillows.
Kurt’s mouth dropped open a second much to Blaine’s amusement before he finally pulled it together.

“Blaine, what the hell? What Genius idea is that again? Where do you think you are going with my bedding set?”

“Kurt…”

“No but seriously, do you plan to turn us into hobos and go sleep in the street in the middle of the fucking night?”

“Do you have a roof?”

Of all the things Kurt had expected to come out of Blaine’s mouth, that was probably the last one on his list. He was so startled that he didn’t know what to say. He just looked at the other man, mouth open, a pretty dumb expression on his face.
Whatever Kurt might say, he could see the resemblance, for one, to his brother. It didn’t matter that Finn wasn’t his real brother, but Kurt had certainly had picked up some things from him. Not that Blaine would ever tell him that his dumb face could easily compete with Finn’s. No, he wasn’t that crazy, whatever Kurt may believe at the moment.

“Do you have a roof?” repeated Blaine, smiling after a few seconds of Kurt looking at him in a superb goldfish imitation.

Kurt didn’t talk but just moved his gaze to the ceiling and back to Blaine, his expression moving to something that Blaine could easily translate into those words: “But, my, is he stupid or what? Is he really serious?”
Blaine couldn’t help but chuckle. He quickly tried to regain his composure when he saw the look Kurt threw him. That was a known and acquired taste for Blaine. Not a sweet one, but he knew that he better talk.

“Not the roof above our heads, not the ceiling. I’m not that stupid…” but Kurt’s eyebrow begged to differ, “I mean as in a rooftop like the roof of the building.”

“Um, yeah,” answered Kurt, still totally lost. “I quite believe that every building has one and…”
Blaine finally saw the realization hit the other man.

“Wait! Wait! Do I think you are doing what you think you are doing?”

“It depends if…”

“There is no way I’m gonna go spend the night on the roof with you!” Kurt cut him off. “Do you realize it’s like minus a hundred degrees out there? We’re in April, Blaine, April! Not Indian summer!”

“That’s what the covers are for.” Blaine replied calmly.

“Blaine, why? Just tell me why? Why would go to the roof in the cold in the middle of the night?”

“Please, Kurt? Please? I promise you will love it.” Blaine gave him his famous puppy eyes and Kurt cursed himself again for never being able to resist those.
He should definitely work on that. Turning his head away wasn’t enough. He could still feel Blaine’s gaze on him and as soon as he did, Blaine knew he had won. It didn’t stop Kurt from groaning a bit more.

“I just don’t see why we would go up there when we actually have a roof over our head right now.”

“Yes, but it’s a mess. Stop complaining, it will be fun! Live a little! Here, put that on and take the plate,” said Blaine, giving him the clothes. Kurt dressed himself, still cursing under his breath.

“I just don’t understand what you expect to find over there. There are not even stars to look at! We’re in New York for god’s sake! The only lights you can see at this ungodly hour are the one that shine over the low life women that work their shift in the neighborhood.”

Blaine just chuckled and grabbed all the covers, pushing a very reluctant Kurt toward the door. He was dragging his feet but Blaine knew that he had won. Kurt couldn’t say anything now that would change the events that Blaine had planned for the night. Or could he?

“Fine, the house is a mess, but not the bedroom.”
Blaine froze on the spot.

“What did you say?” he murmured, not sure if Kurt would hear him but he had. He turned slowly on his heels and looked at Blaine with what Blaine liked to call his bedroom eyes.

“I said, the bedroom is clear. We don’t even need those covers. We can leave all that here and we’ll be warm enough there. What do you think? Wanna pick up where we left off? Maybe you can even fuck me this time.” Kurt said slowly with his lowest voice, eyes deeply fucking Blaine who forgot how to swallow.

“How… how… about… the roof?” stuttered Blaine.

“No. You can fuck me here, not on the roof. Right here. In this room, against the wall if you want or over there, bent against the sofa. What you think, baby?”

To say that Blaine was breathing hard would be an understatement. It was like all of Blaine’s mind had short-circuited. It has been so long since he had seen Kurt talk like that or act so damn obscene. Actually, he had never heard him talk so dirtily ever. When they were together all those years ago, Kurt had always been a bit shy when it came to sex. Apparently, he had changed. Blaine should have figured it out last night but he was a bit distracted elsewhere. Blaine knew now. He saw it. God forgive him, but it was the best thing in this word. Kurt giving him these looks. Kurt speaking those words. Blaine just wanted to take him right here, right there, fuck him hard, and rough, and… everything Kurt had said. Everything…
… Just like Kurt said.
Kurt knew. He knew that between the two of them, Blaine had always been the hornier one, the kinkier one, the more sex driven one. He knew. Oh yes, he did. That’s why he had that stupid smirk on his lips, that jerk. He knew what kind of man Blaine was. Well, times change.
Two can certainly play at that game.

Blaine slowly started recomposing himself and as his breathing started returning to an even pace and a smile started composing on his face, he could see confusion spreading on Kurt’s face. There was doubt but mostly confusion, the confusion of a man not used to losing.
Two can play that game, Mr. Hummel.
Blaine suddenly launched into Kurt, who for a second thought that he had won. He started laughing and closed his eyes, ready to feel Blaine’s body pressed against his.
He was sure that this was it, that the rest of the night would be spent over the couch because he knew that was Blaine’s favorite position when he topped. The earlier confusion was nothing but his imagination. Blaine had that smile only because he was happy, eager to fuck him, the bastard. It’s so easy to manipulate this man, thought Kurt.
Indeed, so easy.
Blaine heard Kurt’s laugh and saw his eyes closing and he couldn’t help but feel victorious inside. Instead of launching into Kurt’s arms as the other man thought, he grabbed the plate in Kurt’s hands and turned back toward the door, opening it and rushing into the hallway. He had only a couple of seconds at most before Kurt would realize his feint, and would come running after him screaming for murder. He had to reach to elevator quickly and…
Oh, and then what exactly, Anderson? What is your genius master plan?
Damn, he should have thought this one further.

Kurt couldn’t believe what the hell just happened!

Blaine had fucking screwed him over! He had fucking played with him and Kurt had let him. Kurt had fell into his trap. To be honest, Kurt had been the one who started the whole mind game but he would never admit that it was his own damn fault. Not when he would find Blaine and give him a piece of his mind. He wasn’t sure what he was going to do to him, only that a rooftop in the middle of the night opened the way to countless possibilities. Some were not that sane, but Kurt wasn’t really a sane man.
No man would be sane after having his cock chewed.
He would think of something. He always did. He grabbed the covers that Blaine had left behind and hurried outside.

“Damn you, Blaine Anderson! I hate you!” Kurt screamed after Blaine, following him into the corridor towards the elevator.

Only then did he realize that they were not alone and that his neighbor was actually in the hallway as well, probably coming back from a party since he wasn’t really walking straight, nor was the man by his side.

“Is everything ok over here?” asked the man.

Kurt made a mental note in a back of his mind to ask him if he had always been gay or if he had just come out recently because frankly he was pretty sure he was the only openly gay in the building, believe it or not. It was a fact that his middle-aged neighbors liked to complain about behind his back. Well, looks like some of them were hiding in the closet too.
That could wait until tomorrow though because right now he was too busy running after Blaine who had just walked into the elevator with a victorious grin on his face.
He still took the time to shout back to the man with his neighbor.

“Rough night. Almost had my dick eaten by that jerk over there, but you know, nothing unusual in our world!”

Kurt reached the elevator and as he was about to start yelling at Blaine again and probably hit him on the head or something, they heard the voice of their neighbor’s “lover” from the other side of the corridor.

“Hey, just to be clear, I don’t do cannibalism. I didn’t sign up for that unless you wanna talk money again…”

Forget about lover.
Forget about killing each other.
Kurt looked at Blaine and a second later, they were both laughing hysterically.

The door of the elevator closed, lifting them up to the top floor, toward the rooftop and a sleepless night in Manhattan.

When the elevator’s doors opened at the 31st floor, both men were still giggling and Kurt had long forgotten about his murderous plans on the rooftop.

“Let’s just call it even, shall we?” said Blaine like he had heard Kurt’s thoughts as he stepped out of the elevator.

“3 times tonight. I feel like a beaten puppy,” groaned Kurt, a playful yet outraged expression on his face. Blaine just looked at him with a smirk and patted his arm with his free hand.

“No. I’m the puppy. You’re the kitty.”

They were now walking up the last steps toward the rooftop, Blaine leading the way and holding the plate of food while Kurt was following, groaning and pulling the bedding set behind him.

“That’s even worse. I’m supposed to be the smarter and more dignified one. I feel like a kitten forced into water.”

“Well, you do have the same outraged expression.”

“Suddenly, my plans about pushing you from the roof seem oh so legit. How about that outrage?”

Whatever Blaine planned to answer got caught in his throat as he finally pushed open the rooftop door and stepped outside. Every little thing seemed to vanish around him and nothing could reach him anymore. Not Kurt still bickering behind him, nor his pushy attempts to get Blaine out of the way so he could get through the door as well. Blaine was frozen on the spot, his eyes wide open and an astonished expression on his face. It was like a kid in front of a Christmas tree for the first time in his life, Kurt noticed when he could finally make his way out to stand next to the frozen man. He was just like a kid at Christmas looking at all the lights of the city in wonder. All of Manhattan was a sight and it was a splendid view for anyone who discovered it for the first time. There was a feeling of being lost in that gigantic island in the midst of all this organized chaos of those millions of lives trying to survive in a small land. Those lives were packed into those skyscrapers, defying the sky, defying gravity, always trying to reach higher just like their inhabitants. They tried to reach higher, reach further just like their lights. Always further, always higher. Reach the sky. Hide the stars. Enlighten their own stars, those billboard stars, those people that had already reached the top and that everyone looked at, head raised in awe and envy. They became goals to reach, to achieve. It was the American dream in an island.
Just like that Christmas tree with the superb ornaments on the front, it had a hidden face. There was a face where all the lights were broken, the branches too weak to hold anything. There was a weak face of the city and Blaine could turn around and see it too. It was a part of the city that was enlightened too, but the light was different. People saw it differently, both people living there and people living elsewhere. They all know that the light there is different because the packed people there fear the light. They break the light. They don’t raise their heads to the faded billboards. They close their eyes and imagine something else. Just like that city, there is nothing to expect, nothing to imagine and so the lights dim slowly, slowly, and the heads raise and people come out.
Blaine could see all that; the dimmed lights and the powerful ones, the billboards and the stars, the skyscrapers and the people in them, under them, the people raising their heads to them and those who just went through, toward other horizons, toward the dimmer lights, towards what Blaine couldn’t see, and wished to never see, like so many others, the pitch black.
Just like a kid, he wished he only had to see the front face. He didn’t suspect anything else, just the polished, lightened face of the tree, of the city.
Christmas.
Manhattan.

Kurt was looking too. He really was. When Blaine turned to look at him, he saw that he wore the same look filled with wonder, the same wide eyes, that same 5-year-old-child-in-front-of-a-Christmas-tree expression, that same hope for the world, the same dreams of reaching higher and of shining brighter.
Kurt felt so lost at the same time; lost in a sea of people, of lights, lost on an island of dreams and fallen stars.
Blaine just turned his gaze toward the sky, way above the city lights and past the clouds that obscured their lives. There was nothing to see. There were no stars, just pitch black. They stars had fallen and no one had taken the time to pick them up, too absorbed in those other billboard stars, material stars.
They never raised their heads a bit higher, too sacred to see something that would make them feel any smaller, smaller than the one in a few million persons on an island, too afraid to look at something they would not comprehend, something they were sure they would never be able to reach. They just ignored those stars because they didn’t know. They put brighter lights so they would hide them if they ever raised their heads a bit too high. They would hide forget about the menace, that unknown menace.
There were those who could shine enough to stay visible. They saw them. They took the sky for what it was really. Their finitude is there, above them always. They didn’t have to raise their heads to see that it was waiting for them. Every day they could feel it drawing closer and feel it in their soul. It was there and they would never be able to avoid it.
They would never take the time to just stop a second and look at it. They would tell you that they were oh so aware of it already with just enough fear.
The rest didn’t have time, too busy to follow the shining lights, too scared to stop and see that they have no control over their lives after all, no control whatsoever.
Kurt had never stopped to look at it. Not during his time in New York, not on this shameless, pitiless island. Back then in Ohio, he looked at it. He had seen the stars as a promise for the future but not since. He was afraid to look at it and not see the stars; just the pitch-black sky, his pitch-black life, alone and lost, and with no control whatsoever over it.
Now he was looking and truth to be told, it wasn’t that scary.
Not when he had laid the covers on the floor and rested on top of them with Blaine at his side. Not when Blaine was holding his hand and pressing his side against his. Not when Blaine’s breath was soothing his own. Not when there was Blaine.
He could look now and even if he didn’t see the stars, even if he had no idea what was behind those clouds, what that dark sky meant, it was ok. It was even…

“Beautiful,” whispered Kurt.

It was the first words that either of them had said in a long time. They had stayed so long looking at the sky standing, sitting, sometimes eating a bit of the cooling dish, but their eyes never really left the sky and the surroundings. After a while, they had put the plate away and arranged the covers on the floor with the cushions all over them. Kurt had lain there, followed with Blaine, draped next to him and still not talking. They didn’t need to, really. They were too busy thinking, talking to themselves and reflecting on their lives. The Christmas feeling had long disappeared but they were not scared, not disappointed. They were just ok, at peace.
It was a first for both of them, a first time again. It was a time where all the planning, the reaching, the struggling wasn’t really important. It didn’t seem that big suddenly. It was a strange but beautiful feeling.

“Yes. Beautiful,” repeated Kurt, his voice a bit stronger.
For the first time in a long time, he turned to look at Blaine, to really look at Blaine. As if the other man had known it all along, he turned too and their gazes met in the middle, forgetting all about the sky just like that. It was quick but wasn’t that the point of it all? We realize that some things are out of our reach, our understanding, and focus on what we could comprehend, what we knew, what really mattered.
We could focus on who really mattered, those people that you’re not afraid to look at the sky with and to share how lost really you are. Those people who understand your vulnerability and share their own, just together.

“You are beautiful,” responded Blaine, his voice not higher than a murmur.
He leaned in to kiss Kurt quickly on the lips, just a quick peck, and turned back to look at the sky.

“I missed this. Looking at the sky, like this with you, like when we were 17 in your backyard in Ohio,” remembered Blaine. “When we looked at the stars and for us, it was a promise for the future. You looked at the stars and you imagined it was New York waiting for you.”

“I remember. Who knew that New York wasn’t in the stars? That it didn’t have stars, as a matter of fact?” Both men chuckled.

“I don’t mind. Really, it’s not important that we can’t see them because I know they’re still there. And if they’re not, so what? I don’t really need them now. They might or might not be. It doesn’t change what I feel now.”

Kurt turned to look at Blaine in awe and he couldn’t believe what he was hearing, what Blaine was saying. He just couldn’t understand. Blaine was basically saying something that he had never heard anyone say; that he was living the present moment and that was it. Whatever could be, whatever would happen in the future, in the next second, whatever was, it didn’t matter. What mattered, what needed to be lived was right there, right now.
Kurt didn’t realize how much Blaine had changed until this moment and how much he had matured. It just made him fall in love all over again. He was rare, he was precious, and Kurt would be a fool to ever let him go. Kurt promised himself at this instant to work all of his life to change everything bad in him and to never screw things up again. He would get better because Blaine was better. Blaine was worth it.

“I didn’t realize…” started Kurt, suddenly standing straighter to lean his back against the wall.

Blaine was confused at the sudden change. He wasn’t sure what he had said to make Kurt look so unsure but just a quick glance at Kurt made him realize that he hadn’t screwed up everything. That was probably a first.
He went and sat next to Kurt, almost curled up at his side and asked him.

“You didn’t realize what?”

“I don’t know,” began Kurt hesitantly. He looked at Blaine, who encouraging him with his eyes to say whatever he needed to say, and so he picked up again, his voice stronger this time. “I just realize that you have grown so much, that you changed so much. I’m not saying it’s a bad thing,” he quickly added when he saw Blaine’s worried look, “I’m just saying that right now, next to you, I really feel 17.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that those 5 years apart made you stronger, made you a real man. You’re no longer a boy. You changed. For the better, just to be clear. You matured. You are deeper than before.”

“That’s what he said!”

“Oh, fuck you!” Kurt couldn’t help but laugh, poking at Blaine’s sides as he was snickering at him. “I’m actually serious right now.”

“Sorry, sorry, but it was too easy.”

“Just like you baby.”

“I thought we proved earlier that I wasn’t, as much as you want me to be.”

“Hmph.”

“I’m sorry baby, but it’s so easy to tease you, especially when you don’t have your usual wit activated. A man’s gotta take advantage of every little moment he gets.”

“Just like when you bit me? I’m pretty sure you damaged me back there. My second brain must be truly more connected to my first one than I originally thought.”

“Right baby, just keep making excuses. Truth is you just lost your bitch power and you have to deal with it.”

Kurt just looked at him, mouth open, desperately trying to say anything back, but Blaine just laughed at him, poking at his sides this time.

“You broke me, you bastard,” groaned Kurt, feigning anger but he couldn’t keep a straight face with Blaine smiling at him like that, his whole face beaming and his eyes shining.

He smiled back and dropped his face, burying it in the crook of Blaine’s neck with a sigh. Blaine let out a small giggle and put his arms around the other man’s waist, pulling him closer and closing his eyes. He just breathed his smell in for a few seconds while Kurt was leaving small kisses on his neck here and there, just little pecks but enough to send shivers along Blaine’ spine. It felt good, like heaven.

All too soon, Kurt pulled back from his neck and just rested his head on his shoulder. They fitted perfectly like they always had.

“What I meant,” said Kurt after a while, “is that you’ve really grown up and that I feel like I’ve just been 18 all along, never changed since the day we moved to NY.”

“What do you mean? You have changed so much! You have started your own fashion company! You just pulled together your first Broadway show! It takes a lot of growing up to do that! You freakin’ manage dozens of people every day!”

“Yeah, maybe on a professional level and yet I’m not really sure what I’m doing.”

“But…”

“No, listen to me. I’m right.”

“You always are.”

“No, really. I’m serious Blaine. I don’t know how to explain it and I’ve never really thought about it but now that I see you, I realize that you have changed so much, grown so much and I didn’t really.” They both turned their heads to look at each other.

“I haven’t grown that much…”

“What I mean is that period with Lisa, no matter how painful it might have been, no matter what a lie you thought you were living, it forged you. It really did. You’ve grown emotionally when I didn’t. I feel like I’m the same 18 year old that I was. Truthfully, I think it’s because I’ve never really taken the time to stop and think about it. I’ve been running through life all those years. Those 5 years went by so fast. Even back then, during those 2 years when we were together, we were so busy trying to work things fast that I’ve never taken the time to just stop and think. I’ve worked, but never worked on me emotionally. It doesn’t matter that I’ve dated countless men. Well, not dated, because that’s it. I didn’t date. I’m sorry to say that to you, but it’s never been about feelings, just sex. I’ve screwed countless men. Even after, when I started “dating”, I never really committed to it. I just did it. I don’t know if you understand but I just feel that I’ve never really took the time to stop and think about what it meant. I’ve never really changed how I did things. I just did them. I didn’t learn anything. I just made the same mistakes, again and again. Even in my work, I just went at it head first. Never raising to see what was above, never stopping.”

Blaine didn’t know what to say to that. He was pretty sure Kurt didn’t need an answer or a solution. He just needed someone to listen to him, and again Blaine was sure it was the first time he talked about it to anyone. It was the first time there actually was anyone he could talk to about it and it was the first time he had opened enough to not only someone else but to himself and thought about his insecurities. He had insecurities even in matters that people were sure he was rocking. His work was his pride, everything he had achieved. He wasn’t trying to reconsider everything he had done. Blaine knew he was really sharing all the fears he’d had over the years; when he thought he would never make it, when he had been hurt, cheated on, again and again and again, when there was no one to talk to, when Blaine wasn’t there, when he couldn’t come back after a hard day and just bury himself in his lover’s arms and just cry. Blaine would have let him cry, never asking him anything unless he was sure Kurt would want to talk about it. Kurt would want to. He would because Blaine had always been the only one he could talk to, even more than his dad. He was the only one he could open up to just like he was doing now.
Blaine hadn’t been here, but he was here now. He was listening now, better late than never. Listening to Kurt, Blaine realized that Kurt had feared that never.
Blaine had feared it at first, but something had changed along the way and he didn’t fear the never anymore. Suddenly, he had hope. He knew why and he knew what Kurt was talking about. He told him that.

“You know, sometimes, I used to lie down in my backyard back in Boston and look at the sky. To be honest, it used to scare the hell out of me. I was thinking about you and wondering where you were. I just felt lost, totally and completely lost. Those were the first days of my marriage with Lisa.”

“And what changed?” asked Kurt with caution. It’s like he already knew and feared the answer because it would bring back so many other concerns and questions in his life. Soon enough, there it was.

“Dianna.” Yep, Kurt knew it. “I don’t know how but having Dianna on my side, looking at the sky with me changed that. I don’t know how to explain it, but it made things ok. I wasn’t so scared anymore.”

Blaine had been talking so naturally that he hadn’t thought about he was saying exactly. He didn’t realize until he had stopped. He wanted to slap himself. He had basically just told Kurt that he hadn’t been so important anymore when he had had a daughter. Gosh, what an idiot! That’s not what he had meant, but it was too late. He was too afraid to look at Kurt now, but he had to make sure he was ok and make him understand that he had never stopped thinking about him. It’s just… what was it really?
When Blaine looked at Kurt, he didn’t know what to say anymore because even if Kurt had tears in his eyes, he was still smiling. In that strange smile, it was like he was part of a secret, like he knew what Blaine was talking about and yet he didn’t. Blaine didn’t expect that.

“I understand, Blaine. I really do.”

“That’s not what I meant. I… Kurt… you… always meant…” Blaine started to ramble but Kurt just shushed him with a quick kiss and started talking again to a flabbergasted Blaine.

“I know you always cared about me. I know, don’t worry. I know you’ve always loved me. I know.” Blaine was relieved that Kurt knew, but he didn’t understand how.

“Blaine, when I said that you’ve matured, that’s exactly what I meant. You can’t explain it but I can. Dianna. Now, I can’t explain it any better but we both know that becoming a father changed you a lot. It made you see things with different eyes, with grown up eyes and from a different angle. It’s something that I haven’t reached yet. You changed. Being a father made you something so much more and the best thing is that you don’t even realize it. But I do. Seeing you now and seeing you with your daughter just makes me love you more because that’s just you but with something more. I’m sorry if I’m not making any sense.”

“No, I understand. And thank you.”

“For what?”

“Understanding.”

“I might be biased.”

“How come?”

“Lately… I…” Kurt wasn’t sure if he wanted to share this, but one look at Blaine made all his doubts disappear. If he wasn’t going to tell Blaine, what was then point at all of having dreams? “Lately, I started thinking about it. I think perhaps I’ve realized that I needed more in my life. I guess I’ve been figuring out slowly that I haven’t changed that much or maybe not at all. In any case, I’ve been craving more. I’ve been craving paternity. I’ve been thinking about having a kid.”

If Blaine was expecting something, that was definitely not it. It hit him hard, how close Kurt really was to moving on, to starting a real life and beginning something else away from Blaine’s memory just like Blaine had done. He had never forgotten about Kurt. He still had hope somehow but Kurt had been to the point to where he had given hope, to the point where he wanted to find a partner and start a family.

It was stupid really, but Blaine couldn’t help but feel betrayed. That was really obnoxious when he himself had a family but he just didn’t think Kurt could. I mean, he had seen how Kurt was with his relationships. Use and toss. Apparently, he was wrong. What else was he wrong about then?
Kurt saw Blaine’s expression change from surprise, to anger, to hurt and he didn’t understand why. He couldn’t begin to comprehend why Blaine would react like that. What a phony he was when he had his own family! Kurt had promised himself he wouldn’t get mad anymore without getting any explanations first so he tried to breathe evenly, as hard as it was, and locked his eyes on Blaine’s.

“What’s wrong?”

“I just thought… I didn’t think you were ready to start a family.” Blaine said with caution, feeling like he was walking on eggshells or a mine field.

“Why?” Kurt’s eyes narrowed in anger but he tried to keep his voice even.

“I mean… I saw… I know… your relationships with men, and I’ve witnessed… I mean… Adam… I hadn’t… you know the feeling you were ready for a relationship… I’m sorry… but…”

The longer Blaine was talking, the more he realized that Kurt wasn’t really listening to him anymore. Actually, Kurt had seemed to reach an understanding that Blaine wasn’t sure he got and he was even pretty amused. Maybe not amused, but definitely no longer angry. Blaine was so baffled that he thought he better shut up and let Kurt explain.

“Oh! I’m sorry, Blaine. You thought that… that I was ready to settle down with a man and all.”

“Well, yeah…”

“Didn’t the tale of my multiples mistakes and failed relationships teach you better?”

“But…oh!” Finally, Blaine caught on. It was almost cute to see how long it had taken him and Kurt couldn’t help a chuckle. “Oh, you want to do it alone?”

“Yes.” Kurt confirmed. “I had resigned myself to the fact that relationships were definitely not my thing and I didn’t a man in my life to do whatever I wanted. I wanted, well, still want I suppose, a kid and I should get it even if I didn’t have a man in my life. I knew it wasn’t going to be easy being a single father, gay on top of it all, but I really started to think about it. That is until you came along.”

Blaine was at loss again. He had no idea what to answer to that, how to feel about it. He knew the response that Kurt was waiting for wasn’t for him to feel guilty or anything, so what was it? Despite everything, all Blaine could feel was guilty. He felt guilty because he had promised one day they would have a kid together, a family. Now Blaine had his daughter, his no matter what a stupid DNA test said, and Kurt wanted a kid. He had even renounced having a man in his life. He just wanted to have a child. Whatever it was meant to mean, Blaine couldn’t help but feel sad, especially now that he realized what he had said earlier to Kurt when he said that Dianna had changed everything.

“I’m sorry… Kurt, I…” He wanted to say so much more, but there was nothing really to say.
Kurt knew it. He wasn’t mad at him. He wasn’t anything at him. He was smiling. He was smiling a sad little smile, his eyes sparkling with unshed tears, and that was it. Blaine couldn’t do anything about it, couldn’t say anything right now.
So as usual whenever things got too heavy and there was nothing to do about it, Kurt would have the same reaction.

“I thought about artificial insemination, but if you keep doing what you’re doing and eating my cock like that, I’m not sure there will be anything left to inseminate with.”

Kurt would laugh it off.

Blaine would laugh or at least pretend to laugh.

Something had changed since those times because Blaine had moved on, had changed, and it would be harder for him to pretend. Kurt was trying to move on, to grow up, and his jokes were harder to tell.
They both knew it but they both knew that there was nothing to do about that at the time, nothing at all. Blaine still had a daughter, lost somewhere in the lights of the city. Kurt still didn’t have one but wanted one. God, did Blaine want to give it to him! He really wanted to but the timing was the worst ever. Kurt was right.
It didn’t stop him from wanting it, from want that someday soon. He would give everything to Kurt and much more.
When he lay back, looking at the sky, that’s exactly what he was thinking about and looking forward to.
Kurt was lying down too next to him, his head resting on Blaine’s heart. Blaine’s arms were encircling him as if he was trying to protect him, to soothe him, but some things can’t just be soothed.
It was a weird sensation, one that Blaine had never felt before looking at the sky. He was so rested, so confidant with Kurt draped over him in his arms, a long lost dream finally found and yet a persistent questioning. The sky was hiding some mysteries that he craved to unravel.
Just like Kurt at his side, he was a little bit afraid of the future, of what was above his head that he couldn’t reach yet and that he couldn’t see yet.

The sky looked bittersweet tonight.