May 21, 2012, 7:50 a.m.
Expect the unexpected : Chapter 13
E - Words: 6,636 - Last Updated: May 21, 2012 Story: Closed - Chapters: 19/? - Created: Sep 11, 2011 - Updated: May 21, 2012 278 0 0 0 0
The only thing he remembered before waking up was being in the theatre curled up in Blaine's arms! Blaine! Was it his look behind his back?
This though made him roll over in one quick movement and finally open his eyes wide.
Sure enough, he was there. Blaine was sitting on a chair, his back resting on the wall, and a peaceful expression on his face, that didn't match at all the intensity of his stare. Those perfect hazel eyes that were still penetrating Kurt like they could see all the way to his soul. He didn't move when he saw Kurt slowly stand up and rub his eyes with the palm of his hands. He just kept staring at him, a little smile upon his face, almost like he wasn't even here. Like he was lost in the deepness of Kurt's eyes.
Kurt didn't know what to do but to meet his gaze. He fixed his eyes to meet Blaine's and what he saw in them, scared him. He was frightened to death by the intensity of their gaze locked at each other, the way they seemed to be glued together, the way he wanted them to stay like that forever. Discovering each other again and again and falling in love again and deeper for every little thing they hold.
Was he ready? Was Kurt ready to face that destiny? To let himself sink into Blaine's eyes, Blaine's arms, Blaine's heart? He wanted it so badly. He wanted to stop holding back, fighting back, and just let Blaine in. Like he was doing right now.
But it wasn't that easy. Nothing was. Before he could just commit to his fate, he had to know. Why. How. And especially he had to know if the surrender was worth it.
He blinked and his brain seemed to click. As much as it hurt, he tore his gaze away, determined to know more. Blaine didn't move, didn't flinch a bit. The silence was too palpable, the tension was too electric, and the air was holding so much. Any word, any movement could break it all. So he moved and he talked.
"Hi there… " Kurt's voice was so deep. Almost like he growled. Almost like he hadn't spoken in weeks. Truthfully, nothing he had said in weeks, in months, in 5 years mattered. No word had been truth until now. Until this very moment when both men were able to see each other souls without any artifices. The absolute truth without any words. But Kurt needed words, he just didn't know what to say . He needed to know where he was, how he made his way into this room with Blaine, and if, this, here, now, was not a gigantic mistake.
"Hi." Replied Blaine. His voice was like silk, like love. "I didn't want to wake you. But I couldn't sleep either. I was just watching you sleep. I'm sorry if you think it's creepy. But Kurt, you are never more beautiful than when you sleep. When all your guards are down and you lie there, so vulnerable. I've always watched you sleep back in the days, even if you didn't know it. I watched you rest, from all the challenges of life, and I was happy. Because I knew that if I wanted, I could just lie there and be reckless with you. Let my guards down with you in my arms and forget about life. I could just wrap myself around you, like I was protecting you. But I never did Kurt. I've never had to protect you. You're the one who kept protecting me. You're the one who hold me thigh. And I could only lay there, holding on to you. But I didn't, I just usually kept starring at you, sleeping, not believing that this perfect man, this angel was mine. I regret those times Kurt, and in the same time, I don't. I regret those, because I wish I would go back to those day and cuddle with you, instead of looking at you. Because Kurt, for 5 years, I couldn't just lay there with you, if I wanted. I couldn't look at you sleeping like a baby who life didn't altered yet. I just couldn't Kurt and it killed me"
Blaine's voice broke, and tears started to fell upon his cheeks. The exact duplicate of those who were weathering Kurt's face. But, he didn't stop. He got up from the chair and came to kneel down in front of the bed, taking Kurt's hands in his palms. Not ever breaking his gaze.
"It killed me Kurt but in the same time, I don't regret it. Because even if it hurt, even if sometimes I would cry, I could very well imagine you in bed sleeping. Every time I woke up alone in my own bed. Before I even opened my eyes. For a second, I pictured you, in the other side, sleeping, or slowly waking up with me. And for a second, with my eyes closed, I was happy. I could see you, the beautiful innocent, and in the same time, so strong you. I could almost smell you, and hear your steady breath."
"But then I opened my eyes, and you were gone. Because you've never been there, Kurt. It had always been just a mirage. But today wasn't a mirage Kurt. I got to see you sleep, I got to be there, it was true. If I die tomorrow, Kurt, I would be happy because I got to see this perfect picture again. More than happy Kurt, because I got to see you awaken also. You know, I'm from the kind of people who think that the fact of waking with another one in his side, if way more intimate than the sexual moment that might have happened the night before. In sex, you still control yourself at some extent. When you wake up, you have no guards whatsoever, Kurt. Your defenses are down, the image you like to project to the world is not put yet; and it's just simple, plain you. The you, with that messy hair, who I think is so sexy, the morning breathe, that I don't even acknowledge, those sleepy eyes, that never seem to be more beautiful or more hard to define. But I don't care, they might green, gray or blue, they are still the sweetest I've ever seen. I love them so much as I love seeing you wake up. As I wish to spend the rest of my life seeing you wake up. As I never want to miss another day without you by my side. Without you looking at me like that. Still sleepy, a bit confused by everything that happened, so unsure of yourself, so lost, and not realizing that's the man I fell for. The man behind the mask. The timidity behind the confidence. The weakness behind the strength. The purity behind the life. The man that is in front of me, and who has never been more perfect. "
Blaine stopped talking and lowered his stare. Now that he had confessed everything to Kurt, he wasn't so sure of himself anymore. He was scared that Kurt would get overwhelmed and run away. That he couldn't take what Blaine was offering him. That he didn't feel the same. But he wasn't going to worry too much, as quickly enough, he heard the most unexpected sound ever. He heard Kurt giggle. The surprise was too much, for him not to return his gaze were he was locked previously. Sure enough, Kurt was here, looking down at him, a tiny smile on his lips.
"You had to do all this speech right Blaine? You couldn't be more concise and say that you, creepy man, watched me sleep, just because you loved me?" said Kurt, with a teasing tone.
But Blaine, relief floating over him, knew better. He knew that Kurt wasn't really teasing him. He knew that the spark in the other man's eyes was everything but a joke. He knew that the little tear that suddenly detached from his left eye wasn't one of hurt either. Kurt was in fact just so touched but he didn't know how to show it. He knew that the man was so scared, so broke, that he didn't know how to respond anymore. He didn't know what to say. But Blaine heard him, he understood him. He always knew.
"I could have, but I wouldn't be me, would I?" not really teased back Blaine.
"No, you wouldn't." said Kurt, still smiling. But he didn't stop there, as he pulled Blaine up, with him, both seating now at the edge of the bed, staring at each other like there was no tomorrow and said, more seriously and deeply than ever before :
"Good, though, because I love you too."
And suddenly, nothing mattered anymore. Kurt didn't care that he would probably never have the answers to his multiple questions. He didn't care if to know how they've come to be here together, both in that room, wrapped against each other. He didn't care that he might have lost his internal battle. He didn't care to not know what it could mean for them, for the future. Because he knew one thing, and looking at Blaine eyes, holding him tight, he couldn't be more sure of it. It was worth it. Blaine was worth it. Worth what exactly? Everything, anything. The pain, the hurt, the sorrow, the surrender to the love.
So he just leaned forward, finally closing his eyes, leaping in an act of faith, and sealed his sort by pressing his lips into Blaine's. And just like that, they were home.
They could have pretended that they saw fireworks. That an electric current runt between them while they were connecting their lips in a intense, heated moment. But both men knew it wasn't true. It was something else altogether. The moment their lips met each other, it felt like all the tension, all the worries, all the scares vanished. The lump they hold in their throat, in their heart for so long just seemed to disappear. Like they were instantly healed. And that mattered more than anything for them. Because for one, they knew with absolute certainty, that it was the right thing to do.
It was so comforting, that they just stood there, lips pressed together for what seemed like a eternity, before they both finally moved in the same time. Kurt threw his arms around Blaine who hold him tighter than he never did, and finally moved his lips to kiss the crook of Blaine's neck. It still wasn't a act of need or lust, but simply of comfort, just like Blaine had comforted him previously in the theatre. He kissed him slowly, moving his lips from his jaw to the top of his shoulder, taking his time to savor every inch of the other man skin. Blaine buried his head in Kurt's shoulder, sighing in content, smelling the other man like he wanted to never forget again his unique scent, while his fingers run along Kurt's hair.
They could have stayed like this forever, just holding each other, never letting go. Rediscovering each other, tasting each other, feeling them. Never facing the reality again, in the cocoon of Kurt's room.
But the reality always catches you back eventually as a growling sound ripped suddenly the peaceful atmosphere. They both jumped back in shock before they realized quickly that it was only Kurt's stomach that was protesting loudly.
"way to ruin a moment" chuckled Kurt, blushing sheepishly.
Blaine smiled at the sight. Oh god, how much he had missed Kurt's blush!
"It's ok, we have time."
Both knew that Blaine's words hold a deep significance. But they couldn't stop to talk or think about it, since an other growl erupted straight from Kurt's belly.
"Come here" chuckled Blaine getting up, offering his hand to Kurt who took it without hesitation. "Let's find you something to eat."
"Sorry" said Kurt, following him, into the kitchen.
"It's ok. It's almost midnight anyway. You didn't eat since this morning. Take a seat, I'll fix you a sandwich or something."
Kurt took a seat on the counter, while Blaine started to dig some bread from the top shelf and cheese and ham from the fridge. It's almost like he had always been doing this. Fixing dinner for Kurt, for both of them. He knew exactly where to look to find what he needed like he had stored it himself. Went shopping to fill in the kitchen after a long day at work and came back at home, at time to fix dinner for his family. Kurt was having once again his vivid dreams about the big happy picture of the family he could share one day with Blaine. The big picture that involved this, for the rest of their lives. He didn't need children to complete the pretty image this time. He was perfectly content if it was just the two of us, like this, forever.
And the most beautiful in this dream, was that he could see it now. It wasn't such a dream after all. It was even a more and more probable possibility. Something he could look forward too without feeling guilty now that he knew that Blaine felt the same. Now, that he knew that the other man couldn't possibly physically leave him again. They could have it all.
"Why are you smiling?"
Hearing Blaine's voice, Kurt focused again on the reality, without even realizing that he had driven out of it, in the first place. But the image from his dream didn't change. Blaine was still standing here, looking at him, wondering what could probably go through his lover's mind. Kurt smile only grew wider.
"It's just you, standing there, making me a sandwich, making the kitchen yours"
"I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have been going through your stuff without asking you first but…." Blaine started to apologize, like a child caught in fault.
"Oh shush you! You're home and you know it." Responded Kurt quickly before Blaine could make some more amends.
Blaine started to blush, but Kurt wasn't finished with him yet :
"Besides did you see me complaining? No? So now, finish me that sandwich before I decide to eat you alive, hobbit." Completed Kurt, with a bitchy smile.
"I should have let you sleep. You're nicer when you're knocked out, Hummel." Mumbled Blaine, going back to fixing the food, but with a tiny smile on his lips this time.
Neither of them talked for the time it took Blaine to prepare the sandwich but it wasn't uncomfortable. It just felt like it was a habit, like they always did that. Which only increased the daydreaming in Kurt's mind, and he was pretty sure Blaine was thinking about the same thing, with the smile still stuck on his face.
Eventually, Blaine completed the meal and put it on the table, and both men seated down at the table. It wasn't something fancy, just a sandwich and some salad, but it felt like it was the most delicious meal that Kurt had in a long time.
He was already mid way to finish his sandwich when he finally realized that Blaine wasn't eating and was back at looking at him just the same way he did when he had been sleeping. When he caught the glance, he swallowed hard.
"Aren't you eating?" asked Kurt
"No. I mean I already ate. When I brought you back from the theatre." Explained Blaine, his sight focusing again in a normal way.
"oh ok. By the way, I didn't ask you. How did we get there?"
Another phrase with a deep meaning but Blaine, and Kurt was glad about that, decided to take it literally.
"I think you were tired of… crying. You kind of passed out. So, with the help of the security guard, I carried you outside, took a cab, and then, I met with Mercedes and Sam, when we got to your place. Sam took you to your room. I was pretty tired myself."
"Or you're just a tiny hobbit." Teased Kurt. "But really, sorry about that. I hope Mercedes and Sam didn't give you a hard time."
"They were ok actually. I think they noticed that I was pretty out myself. Besides, they were not really in the state of arguing. I guess taking care of a child is more challenging that they initially thought. " smiled Blaine.
"Oh right, Dianna." Kurt wanted to face palm himself for almost forgetting about the little girl. "Did she had a good time? Where is she by the way?"
"It's ok Kurt. Don't worry about her. Just eat. I'll talk" reassured him Blaine, with a loving smile that did very strange thing to Kurt's stomach, which had nothing to do with his hunger, he was sure of that. Maybe it was just different sort of hunger.
"Dianna is fine" said eventually Blaine after making sure that Kurt started eating again, " she had a great time with Mercedes, they went to the park, and went to the zoo, and all. They all have been amazing with her. So she was pretty much exhausted when they brought her home, half asleep. She's in the other room, now, sleeping like the dead."
Kurt simply nodded, his mouth full, while Blaine kept talking: "actually, Sam was pretty cool. He didn't look as mad as the others. He's a great guy. I must say that Mercedes surprised me. Sure, she gave me her usual speech, stuff like she would cut me if she learned that I hurt you, but I sensed some concern in her eyes as well." Finished Blaine, with a sad smile on his face.
"You know Blaine, that those guys care about you too. They are just trying to protect me, but they understand what you've been through also. I guess they just always heard my side of the story, so they are pretty much confused now that they have the two sides. They don't really know how to act, like I didn't know at first. Just give them time to wrap their minds around the whole thing. They'll eventually understand and forgive you, I promise. Just like I did."
It was all about forgive and forget, wasn't it? That's what Blaine kept thinking about while Kurt finished his meal and put the dishes in the machine. Kurt might have forgiven him but he would never forget. He couldn't, how could he? But at least, he forgave him. That's the only thing that mattered to him. Could the others do it, just like Kurt said?
Could his friends strike the past and let him make amends? But in order to do that, he would have to tell everybody his side of the story, in order for them to consider forgiving him. Oh god, was he capable of telling everybody? Did he have the courage for it?
"Are you ok? You seem tense"
Blaine turned around to see that Kurt had been apparently looking at him for some time, a worried expression on his face, his eyes pinched like he was trying to solve the mystery of Blaine' sudden change of mood.
"Yeah, just thinking, you know."
"Come here". Said gently Kurt, pushing him toward the couch into the living room. Both men seated, Blaine in a very unusual stiff position, and Kurt, legs crossed on the sofa, facing Blaine, with the same worried and caring expression.
"I know how it feels. That's why I keep myself so busy, because thoughts, especially mine can be so scary, sometimes. " Blaine simply nodded
"Listen Blaine, if you don't want to talk to me about it, I would understand, but I guess, it would be best for you to get it of your chest."
"Plus, we said that we would be totally honest with each other" completed Blaine.
Kurt just moved forward and took Blaine's hand in his, gently stroking his thumb over his knuckles. Blaine slowly raised his head, to meet Kurt's eyes. And just like that he knew that no matter what, everything was going to be ok. Even if the whole word would turn his back on him, he would still have Kurt and that's only what mattered. He took Kurt's other hand and squeezed lovingly. And this gest, as simple as it was, as random as it might have been for other people, meant the world and heaven for both men. It meant hope.
"It's just not that though" said after some time Kurt, "It's not just about honesty really. It's really about the fact that you have to know that no matter what you say or you think, I'll always be there. You don't have to talk to me now, or tomorrow, but just know that I'm always available. When you can, when you're ready. Blaine, we've seen each other worse, We've did terrible things to each other, that I will always regret, but in the same time, it made me realize that nothing can keep us apart. That nothing more can keep me apart from you. So just take your time, I'll be there for you when you're ready."
Blaine didn't know what to say so he just leaned forward and kissed him. It was quick, but it said all the concepts that Blaine couldn't express aloud. His gratitude, his love, everything. But he also did it, because now, he could. And that what mattered most: if he wanted, he could kiss him.
"I'm ready Kurt. I mean I want to be" Kurt understood that he didn't talk only about tonight but his life in general. About facing Lisa, facing the world, revealing his truth.
"It's not the same thing, Blaine. But I understand."
"No, I have to. If not for me, than for Dianna. I owe her that, at least. But I'm so scared Kurt, I'm so scared." Said Blaine, almost sobbing.
"I know, shush, baby, shush. I know it's scary, but I promise I'll help through it. I want to" said Kurt, holding Blaine tighter. He was trying to hold him in one piece, though he knew that actually, he was trying as hard to hold himself. But maybe, just maybe if they were both in pieces, together, they could be a whole.
" I didn't want to drag her into that mess Kurt. But she's so smart, she understands everything even she can't process it. That's what killing me. If only she was like any 4 years old kid, with her innocence intact, I wouldn't worry so much. But she knows Kurt, she knows how much of a disappointment I am."
"shut up Blaine. You're not a disappointment. You hear me? You're not. I know that and she knows that. And yes she is smart, but babe, there is nothing you can do about it. You will just have to keep her out of it as much as you can"
"And then there is you. I'm sorry Kurt, my comeback made your life a mess!" sobbed Blaine in Kurt's neck.
But Kurt wouldn't take it. He pushed back a confused Blaine, and took his head into the palm of his hands, forcing him to look right through his eyes.
"Do you see any regrets here, Blaine? No? That's because there is none. Blaine, please don't ever apologize again for coming back into my life. Because without you I'm nothing and you're the best thing that ever happened to me. And yeah, it might hurt, but all fucking life hurt, Blaine. But some things are not worth it. You, are definitely worth it. You hear me. You are worth it. And you matter Blaine."
Blaine, much at Kurt's surprise, started giggling. Ok, the man had obviously lost his mind and didn't know how to react properly anymore.
"Isn't it the same thing that your dad said to you, when he gave you the sex talk?"
"Oh my god Blaine! Really? Really, you want to ruin the moment by talking about my father and sex? Really?" But Kurt started giggling and soon enough, both men were laughing like crazy, holding their sides, and poking each other.
Eventually Kurt calmed himself but a tiny smile kept playing on his face. He knew that the only reason Blaine had made that comment, was because the tension was becoming too much between them. And they didn't know how much restrain they could have. And it was definitely not the best moment for that, especially after what happened earlier in the day. So he decided, to change the subject a bit, to keep distracting Blaine, who needed it so much.
"You may laugh Blaine, but that advice was the best that anyone ever gave me. After your "courage" maybe. But it got me to where I am also. That's what I said at my speech at the GLAAD convention!"
"Oh my god, it's right. You did make a speech!" almost shouted Blaine in excitement. "How come, when was that, what did you say?"
"Wow, easy there tiger" laughed Kurt, trying to hold Blaine steady. "Actually they asked me to do it, like a month ago. I wasn't sure about it at first, because I didn't want to become politically involved, but my publicist kept telling me that it was an amazing opportunity for my career and stuff, so I finally gave in. I gave the speech last Wednesday."
"It's amazing Kurt, I'm so proud of you" said Blaine, pulling for a crushing bone hug. "How did it go? What did you say? Wait.. Finn said… said… you talked about me…" continued Blaine, slower this time, calming down from his frenzy. He looked slightly preoccupied.
"Yes and no… Let me explain. I had this speech totally prepared and it was, jus, you know, random, general stuff. I didn't want to give myself too much you know?"
Blaine simply nodded, waiting for Kurt to continue.
"Ok, so, just about when they called my name to get on stage, some smarty whispered to me "Courage" and that was it."
"What… who… How…" where the only words Blaine could say because really, he was more dumbstruck than anything else. He didn't know that a single word, that he once pronounced could change so much in one's life. Actually, just in Kurt's life.
"I actually though about you and improvised. You inspired me, Blaine." Said Kurt, looking deep to his love, who was frozen in awe.
"You inspired my words and made my speech significant. I knew exactly then what I had to talk about. I'll show you if you want, Naya gave me a copy she recorded. But the main thing, is that I said, that even if we didn't need to fight, we still had to. Because of the new generation who was confused and pressured by society and also because of the last generation, all those people who may have lost their way. I said, that I was lucky that my dad was supportive and then I said that I knew that it wasn't the case for a lot of people. And then I talked about you. I said that I had a friend, who was proud and gay and with the right amount of pressure from the world, and the people that surrounded him, all those convictions were shattered. And I said, that for you, my friend, and for all the people in your case, we had to keep fighting, if it's only for you."
"I don't.. I don't know what to say Kurt… " whispered Blaine, who started tearing a bit again.
"Don't say anything, Blaine. You don't have to." Whispered back Kurt, slowly moving his hand, to clean gently the tear that had rolled down Blaine's cheek.
"But Kurt, it just makes it worst…."
"What makes what worst Blaine? I don't follow you.."
"I mean, if the case goes public, I'm not only putting myself and Dianna into a mess, but you too."
"I don't get it" Admitted Kurt, confused
"You see people and media will figure out eventually that I am the one you talked about in your speech, because they always figure out these kind of stuff. And you're going to be much more harassed because people will say that you turned me gay or whatever, and you tried to mess up with my mind by recruiting me into…"
"Recruiting you, Blaine? What the fuck?" almost shouted Kurt, because frankly he couldn't believe that Blaine just said that and it made him angry.
"Or elsewhere, the LGBT community will see you as a hero for bringing me back to my way, or something. That or the other. Fuck, it's a fight you can't win, Kurt! And it's all my fault, I'm sorry. I should have never…" Now Blaine was really freaking out, and started to get on from the couch, hands flying everywhere, like he was thinking about running away or so.
Kurt stayed mouth open in shock for a second, just enough to process what he just heard, before finally snapping off, and chasing Blaine to get him to stop. But Blaine wouldn't have it, and kept fidgeting like a mad man. Kurt put then his hands on Blains shoulders and with all his force, tried to hold him steady because he needed to say something very important and he needed Blaine to actually listen.
"OK, now you shut up Blaine. Just shut up and calm down." Said Kurt, a little bit more harshly than he intended too. But Blaine constant freak out started getting on his nerves. Thankfully, the man got the clue and relaxed in Kurt's hands, a guilty look still on his face.
"Ok, now listen. I don't care about the media or what the people might say. If GLAAD is not happy about my involvement with you, then be it, ok? It's not what matters in my life. Ok? You're my only matter. You and that damn spring/summer collection that's waiting to be finished on my desk ok?" said Kurt, with a lighter tone that actually managed to light up Blaine's face with a tiny smile. Mission accomplished.
"So, don't go freaking out, because everything that you're saying won't happen. And even if it does, I'll deal with it, like I always dealt with it. I'm just gonna tell them to screw that where I think" Blaine, did, this time, actually chuckled, amazed by the man's boldness.
"And Blaine, you have to know, that no matter what, even if it's not about that matter, the world will always see things one sided. It's always a one-side story. People choose the version that suits them the most, and they enter in conflict with the other half who sees the world based on the other side. It has always been like that, and not you, not me, are gonna change that."
"It's unfair." Mumbled Blaine like a child. But he also apparently got the point that Kurt was trying to explain and calmed down significantly. Because of course, Kurt was right. Kurt was always right.
"Has anybody told you? Life is unfair." smiled sadly Kurt, at least relieved that Blaine stopped be irrational.
"May have heard that before. May have experienced it also. It still sucks, you know? I know I might sound like a idealistic fool, saying that, but I just wished that sometimes the world would consider looking at the two sides of the story, instead of just picking up one randomly, because it suits them best."
"I know sweetie, I wish that too. But not everyone is as considerate as you" responded gently Kurt, stroking Blaine knees, with his inch.
"Or you. I know it must have been hard for you to consider both sides of the story, but you still did. You still heard me, and you actually forgave me."
"Because I love you. When you love someone, you actually make the effort to hear the other side of the story. And hopefully, it just become a one side story that we both share."
Blaine's reaction wasn't something that Kurt could have predicted. He suddenly got up, almost knocking out Kurt on the way, and run out of the room, shouting at Kurt to not move and that he would get back right away. Kurt just stood there, shocked, unable to move. What the hell had gotten into Blaine's mind, this time? The man was so unexpected, so inconstant, that it tired Kurt. But in the same time, he couldn't help but be happy about it. That's what had always kept things interested between them. Their constant changes of mood, their unexpected comebacks, everything that kept their relationship from being boring. But Kurt was kind of bored right now. He had expected Blaine to be touched by his speech, at least a bit, to kiss him or something, or just to hold him but not at all, to run flying to his room like fire was chasing him. He sighed.
But quickly enough, Blaine had returned with his guitar in hand and some sheet of paper. Ok, now that was something that was totally unexpected. Did he actually though that it was the moment to compose or something?
"Ok, I might sound like Artie, but what the hell?" exclaimed Kurt, in a perfect imitation of Artie's tone.
Blaine laughed more light-heartedly than he had for a long time. He seated on the edge of the table, in front of Kurt, who was still struck on the couch and said, smiling at Kurt's dumb expression:
"Ok, I might sound weird to you… "
"Say that again" interrupted Kurt, making Blaine' smile grow wider
"But when you where talking about one side stories, I actually remembered a song, that I heard some time ago, and that I wanted to sing to you." Explained Blaine, playing with the strings of his guitar, according it.
"And you think now is the perfect moment for you to sing it ?" asked Kurt in disbelief, still not sure about Blaine's reaction.
"Every moment is an opportunity for music" simply stated Blaine, head down, his fingers going through the cords.
"I though they said that about fashion" mumbled Kurt
"You say fashion. I say music. Now, sush, and listen. It's everything I wished I could say to you, but never knew how to express it."
And then he started singing. And Kurt forgot about his slight irritation. He forgot about Blaine's unpredictability. He even forgot about himself. Because right now, all that mattered, was the beautiful boy, seating across from him, singing his heart out to Kurt.
Ho, how much Kurt have missed his voice, the different faces that Blaine made when he sung, the way his hands run smoothly across his guitar. But mostly he had missed the way he always sung to him. Like he was the only one in the world, even when he was performing in a crowded place. The song was always and only directed to his lover, his friend, his soul mate. Just like now.
And Kurt stopped thinking all together and just forget himself in Blaine's deep velvet voice that was singing all that Blaine never knew how to explain himself. The emotion in his voice was unmistakable, his eyes were sparkling with love.
All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I've been
And how I got to where I am
But these stories don't mean anything
When you've got no one to tell them to
It's true...I was made for you
I climbed across the mountaintops
Swam all across the ocean blue
I crossed all the lines and I broke all the rules
But baby I broke them all for you
Because even when I was flat broke
You made me feel like a million bucks
You do
I was made for you
You see the smile that's on my mouth
It's hiding the words that don't come out
And all of my friends who think that I'm blessed
They don't know my head is a mess
No, they don't know who I really am
And they don't know what
I've been through like you do
And I was made for you...
All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I've been
And how I got to where I am
But these stories don't mean anything
When you've got no one to tell them to
It's true...I was made for you
Blaine resumed the song, playing a few more notes in the guitar before finally stopping altogether. Even then, Kurt didn't dear to speak. He didn't dare to move. Frankly, he wasn't sure he could. He wasn't sure of how he would react. So he just kept staring, frozen, mouth slightly open, to Blaine.
"Kurt, please say something" begged Blaine, because frankly he didn't know if he had scared Kurt or had pissed him off or something. Maybe it was irrational to think this way, but never before, he had seen Kurt so speechless.
"Oh shut up! Just shut up Blaine" finally snapped Kurt before launching forward, attacking Blaine's mouth with his own. He kissed him everywhere, urgently, passionately, and all the heat that lacked on their previous kisses kept rushing back at once. It was too much, way too much to handle, but Kurt didn't care at the moment. And neither did Blaine. It took him less than a second to respond to Kurt's sudden attack, and suddenly he was kissing him back, with as much passion as he was capable of. It was messy, sloppy, needy but it was beautiful. Blaine hand flew to Kurt's hair again, stroking him, holding him closer and closer, never wanting to let him go. Kurt's arms crashed him to his chest, and Blaine couldn't help moan at the sudden proximity of Kurt's body. It's all it took for Kurt to moan back, and sneak his tongue into the other man mouth. Their breath mixed, their tongues moved in unison in a sensual dance, and it was heaven on heart.
After what seemed both an eternity and no time at the same time, they parted finally gasping for air, trying to regain some consciousness before things could get messier. They wanted so much to go further, to explore some more, but, with a mutual silent agreement, they both knew that it just couldn't happen tonight. They were not ready, they were still too much marked to the core. They needed much more than a song and a small talk before they could start to heal. But still, they wouldn't regret what just happened. God no, they could never regret it!
"Well, I take it as you liked my song Hummel" chuckled Blaine, still breathless, a teasing light on his lips. But he couldn't help the slight blush that colored his cheeks.
"Smooth Anderson. Just to let you know, it had nothing to do with you, I'm simply a big fan of Brandi Carlisle. If the mail man sung it to me, I would probably have the same reaction". Teased back Kurt
"Oh shut up, Porcelain." Groaned Blaine.
Kurt burst into laughter, and brought Blaine's head to his chest. He put his arm around the smaller man, and started patting the top of his skull, like he was trying to comfort a little kid. Blaine pretending to pout, feigning annoyance at being treated like a baby. But he wouldn't move for a million bucks. He was finally where he meant to be. In the arms of only man he ever and would always love. His better other half. His main reason to live and survive.
He had no idea what tomorrow would bring, what challenges life would put in his way, but for now he didn't care. That was tomorrow, and tonight, he was safely curled up in Kurt's arms, who was slowly drifting asleep, his breath slowing, and his body finally relaxing. But his arms were still around Blaine, protecting him, reassuring him, loving him.
Yes, tomorrow could wait.