Adam was honestly confused as to what was going on. He'd entered Kurt's loft, was immediately hauled into the living room by an annoyed Kurt, and then gestured at as an argument resumed.

"See. Adam's here. We have a date. Where we leave the apartment. And go have food of the non-vegan variety."

"Kurt!" Rachel sounded just as indignant. "I'm in mourning and as my best friend you should be here to support me!"

Santana, who was lounging on the couch, piped up, "You've been mourning for about a week now, and you haven't let him leave your side. Get over it."

"Thank you, Santana."

"Oh, don't thank me. I agree with Berry. You're staying here."

"What?!"

"You do not get to run off and enjoy yourself while I'm stuck here watching a Barbra marathon alone with her. It's not happening."

Rachel beamed, seeming to ignore the implied insult, and launched into an impassioned speech about the importance of their friendship and time spent together during her troubled time. Santana had started humming Walking on Sunshine, and Adam assumed there was a story there judging by the way Kurt had laughed.

"Wait, is this why you've been canceling on me all week," Adam asked, hating himself for feeling slightly relieved. If it was just a Rachel crisis, then that meant Kurt hadn't been in Ohio doing... well, Blaine.

"Yes. It is. See, Rachel, I can't cancel again."

Rachel, it seemed, disagreed.

Which, after a long and drawn out argument, was how Adam found himself on the couch next to Kurt (who was still sulking), Rachel (who was mouthing along to the dialogue onscreen), and Santana (ignoring them completely in favor of her phone), watching what looked to be every Barbra Streisand movie in existence.

Santana had managed to add Meet the Fockers to the list, to Rachel's horror, but Kurt had sided with Santana on the grounds that I had a date, and you made me stay home.

Halfway through Yentl, Rachel's phone went off and she ran into her room to answer it.

"Do we pause the movie?" Adam asked, not sure of etiquette here.

"If we leave it going we can talk over it and be done with this bonding exercise sooner," Santana reasoned, "Though she might make us rewind it. If we pause it, we can listen in on her conversation, which would make us horrible people," she smirked, "but is well within our rights as roommates."

Kurt paused the movie, hitting the button on the remote viciously.

"You really don't like being cockblocked, do you, Hummel?"

"Shut up," Kurt said, burying his face in his hands. "She hasn't left me alone for days I was looking forward to going somewhere that wasn't school or work. Oh!" he turned to Adam, apologetically, "and I wanted to spend some time with you!"

Santana snickered, but Adam didn't take offense. Mostly because Kurt didn't exactly deny that there was cockblocking go on.

"Hi dads!" Rachel's voice sounded from the room.

"I don't know why she bothers going in there, it's not like there's a door to block off sound," Santana muttered.

"I was just having a movie night with my friends. This break up has been hard on me, you know?"

"She's going to be at this awhile, isn't she," Kurt asked. Adam couldn't really complain, because Kurt took the opportunity to stretch out on the couch, resting his head on Adam's lap.

"I just can't believe he would do that to me," Rachel was saying, which Adam didn't really understand. Kurt had explained the Brody situation to him, but he still wasn't sure how the job he'd had before he met Rachel was something that was done specifically to hurt her.

He valued his life too much to say this out loud. Apparently Santana had flown in Kurt's stepbrother just to beat the crap out of the guy. He'd really rather not get on her bad side. More than he already was.

"I really thought I'd found another Jesse!" Rachel continued. "Someone who could keep up with me vocally and shared my ambition!"

"Who's Jesse?" Adam asked as Rachel continued her rant.

"An asshole," Kurt and Santana said simultaneously, each with a dark look on their face. Santana muttered something about killing a performance.

"I guess he was a little bit too much like Jesse. Though I suppose this is a bit more... adult than throwing eggs at me."

Santana snickered, and Kurt shot her a half hearted glare.

"It doesn't matter. Neither does he. I don't want to let this bring me down anymore."

"Thank the tea cup riding dwarf," Kurt muttered.

"May his lightning boobs strike down all who oppose us," Santana added. Kurt laughed, Adam was confused.

"I'm going to stop letting guys get in the way of my life and start focusing on my career."

"Hallelujah," Kurt said, raising his arms in the air, in a show of mock praise. He smacked Adam's face, patted it in apology, and sheepishly lowered his arms.

"I give it two weeks," Santana said. "Then she'll meet some new guy and that will be the center of her world. Breeders, I swear. Rachel is so much less obnoxious when she's single."

"She seems sweet," Adam said, since Kurt wasn't disagreeing. Though he probably would have if he wasn't still sulking.

"Rachel Berry is not supposed to be sweet," Santana informed him. "She's supposed to be a batshit crazy sociopath whose only goal is to get to the top of the heap and have all her little dreams come true. She is a much better person that way."

"She's not batshit crazy," Kurt insisted, though weakly.

"Yeah, he's dating a guy from school now. Adam." Kurt smiled up at his boyfriend while Santana made gagging noises. "He's nice, and English. I'm so glad that we're both over our high school romances. Obviously it was naïve of us to think that we would actually end up with the boys from Ohio. This way everything works out so much better! It's why I pushed Kurt to start dating again, and I set him and Adam up."

Kurt looked equal parts embarrassed and annoyed, while Santana, oddly, looked furious.

"She didn't even set us up! She actually discouraged me from having anything to do with Adam's Apples!"

"I like how you've gone from 'best friend' to 'newest accessory'."

"Blaine was nice while he lasted, and he really did have potential, but obviously it was never really going to work out."

Kurt looked distinctly uncomfortable now, and slightly betrayed.

"I mean, he wasn't even that confident in his sexuality if his relationship with me was anything to go by."

"... Didn't they go on one date?" Santana asked as Kurt's face turned steadily redder.

"Yes. She kissed him once while he was sober and it was all the convincing he needed that he was gay."

"She kissed your boyfriend?" Adam asked, slightly horrified.

"We weren't dating yet. It's a long story."

"With a lot of alcohol involved," Santana added.

"And it doesn't really matter, because, again, high school sweet hearts never work out, as I'm discovering."

Santana looked offended, now, and Adam really wasn't sure why. "Wait. Is she really basing this on her relationship with Frankenteen?!"

Kurt nodded, and looked hurt. He sat up and wrapped his arms around his stomach. "They broke up how many times in high school? Why is their relationship suddenly the example we all have to live up to?"

"Just because it didn't work out for her doesn't mean it's like... impossible," Santana said, darkly. Adam had never seen her look... vulnerable before. "I mean. It's statistically unlikely, I know. But it's not impossible."

"Brittany will come running back to you soon enough."

"... Thanks."

Adam felt very, very out of place.

"Sam made her eat off the floor," Kurt continued, looking sick. "And I'm pretty sure if Mercedes would answer his calls he'd go back to stripping to pay for his a plane ticket to get over there."

Wait. What?

"You sound almost excited by the idea," Santana pointed out, sounding smug.

Sam. Who was dating Santana's ex. Who Blaine had a crush on. Of course.

"My loyalty is always to Mercedes," Kurt said, but his blush betrayed him.

Santana's phone beeped, interrupting whatever she was going to say. She read it quickly, a grin forming. "Puck says hi."

Kurt looked bewildered. "To me?"

Santana rolled her eyes. "Yeah, to you. He likes you."

Puck... Puck... why was that name familiar?

"He spent all of freshman and most of sophomore year throwing me into dumpsters," Kurt pointed out flatly.

"Yeah, and Quinn drew porn of Rachel in the girls' bathroom. Get over it, we're all besties now."

Wait, was he the guy who Santana was on the phone with when he first started eavesdropping?

"I... guess?"

"Come on. He's had your best interests at heart since he joined Glee club!"

Kurt looked as though Santana had just admitted to throwing out all of his skin care products.

"He did!"

Kurt looked unconvinced.

"He sent you to spy on the Warblers, didn't he?"

Kurt now looked horrified. "Yeah, because he was making fun of me!"

"How do you know he hadn't done extensive research on the school, found out about the harassment policy, figured out what Karofsky was doing to you, and was trying to get you to transfer somewhere you would be safe."

Kurt's mouth opened and closed several times. For a few minutes the only sound was Rachel agreeing with whatever her dads were saying to her.

"Did he?" Kurt finally asked.

"No, that's ridiculous. But it's a possibility that you never considered."

Adam couldn't help but laugh, but turned it into a cough when Kurt glared at him.

"Because it's ridiculous!"

"Yeah. But you didn't see his face at Regional's that year. He looked like he was about to cry during Candles."

What was so special about that song?!

"This is hurting my brain to think about," Kurt muttered as he buried his face in his hands again.

"Actually he spent a lot of time during Glee making heart eyes at you while you and Gelmet made heart eyes at each other."

"Santana, why?"

"It's true! He was very much on board with Team Gay Babies."

Kurt was reduced to simply groaning into his hands.

"He's planned your wedding more times than you have."

"Enough, please," Kurt finally said, as Adam nodded his agreement.

"I'm just saying you should call the guy sometime. He misses you."

Kurt looked ready to cry, so it was probably a good idea Rachel made her triumphant return.

"That was my Two Gay Dads," she announced, somewhat needlessly.

"Yeah. We know," Santana said.

"Wait, how'd you know that?"

"We could hear everything you said," Kurt informed her, while giving her an impressive glare.

The rest of the evening devolved into an argument about privacy, Rachel's lack of tact, how people shouldn't listen in on other people's conversations, a sarcastic suggestion that if someone didn't want to be listened in on, then they shouldn't force people to stay in the loft, and the word "cockblock" coughed very loudly.