March 20, 2012, 2:05 p.m.
We used to be freinds: Here again
T - Words: 2,053 - Last Updated: Mar 20, 2012 Story: Closed - Chapters: 10/? - Created: Mar 04, 2012 - Updated: Mar 20, 2012 780 0 0 0 0
He made it all the way to the commons before he heard a voice call out for him.
"Kurt!"
It was Blaine. He stopped, and sighed, before turning back around.
Wes was jogging behind him, followed by another boy from the Warblers that he didn't recognize.
"Kurt, why did you leave? I thought we were going to get coffee and catch up?" he said looking equal parts confused and hurt.
Kurt gave him a tight sad smile. "I shouldn't have come here, Blaine. I should have just let it go."
"I have no idea what you're talking about," Blaine said slowly, reaching a hand out to his shoulder, "but don't leave. We all have a free period now. Come get coffee with us."
Blaine was looking at him with those stupid wide expressive eyes and Wes was just looking confused but also excited, and Kurt found he couldn't say no to them.
"Erm, yeah, okay," he said sheepishly. "Coffee."
Once they were seated at table in the small Dalton Caf� –and oh yeah, they had a caf�… he really needed to transfer here- Kurt occupied himself with drinking his non-fat mocha and trying to think of a way to break the awkward silence. At least the awkwardness had given him the ability to tamp down on that strange feeling he got whenever he looked at Blaine.
The third boy that had joined them was named David. Kurt took a moment to give him the once over and immediately decided that he was perhaps a bit jealous of him. He was tall and well muscled; he had dark even toned skin that was just looked really smooth. Did he moisturize the way Kurt did? That voice in his head that sounded suspiciously like Puck's reminded him that probably no on moisturized with the vigorous intensity that he did. Which meant it was natural, and Kurt cursed him for it. David appeared to be the complete opposite of Kurt. He was composed and not openly emotional, not effeminate like Kurt, and he definitely didn't appear to be very self-centered or dramatic.
So yes, Kurt was a little jealous that he'd been, for lack of a better word, replaced by someone so completely opposite of him. Plus he kept shooting Kurt this evil look that made Kurt feel as though he were the scum beneath his polished Dalton-issue dress shoes…and he couldn't really put a reason behind it.
"So Kurt, what brings you to Dalton?" Wes asked. "I mean, it's been about a year and a half since you've set foot in Dalton, man. Not to mention called, texted or spoken to us. What changed?"
Ouch. Was that a little bit of hurt and anger that Kurt detected in Wes' voice? Well, it was a two-way door. He contemplated his answer.
I came under severe peer pressure to spy on your glee club so that I could prove myself worthy to my glee club. Also, it was sort of an excuse to see you.
He went with the defensive.
"Hey, it's not like you've been to Lima either…" he said lightly, trying desperately to reign in his inner diva, "but listen, I'm not here to point fingers or talk about what things changed or went wrong. I just wanted to…to see you guys again. I don't really know what prompted it, but it was just this feeling. Okay? I know we haven't been the closest lately, but I still really care about you. I also came to see Dalton. I know this might seem weird to you, but there isn't a day that goes by that I don't wish I'd been able to come here."
He wasn't sure how he had managed to start steering himself into the list of topicshe generally filed under do not talk about with others, but here they were.
"Is that why you stopped coming to see us? Because you were jealous?" Blaine asked tightly.
No. No, I stopped coming because suddenly I found myself in hell and I didn't think that I could handle pretending everything was okay anymore.
"No. Well, not really. I just got caught up in everything that was going on with at home," he said with a shrug. "I think we all did. I don't want to argue over semantics, and I know things can't really be the same, but I'd be really happy if we could try to be good friends again. Or friends. Something. Anything."
I need you.
"Kurt," Wes said with something that sounded like fond exasperation, "We were definitely hurt by your lack of contact. It was as though you had suddenly dropped off the face of the Earth. But we never stopped caring. How could we? I mean, you were a constant present in our lives since we were 6. That's a lot of years dude."
Kurt scowled at the use of the word 'dude' but refrained from commenting.
He felt slightly abashed. He kept his head down, but turned to glance at Blaine through his lashes, biting his lip and waiting.
"You are such a dummy. Of course we can still be friends. We never stopped."
His lips twisted into a small, relieved smile.
"That's it?" David demanded suddenly, as he stood up abruptly. "You're just going to welcome him back with open arms? After all the grief you guys went through when he abandoned you?"
He turned to Kurt and glared at him fiercely. "Listen, Hummel. I don't care what they say, I don't think you're worth their time or friendship."
He then stormed off, and Kurt would later wonder if his next thoughts spoke to the insanity of his life.
That boy doesn't quite have it down; Rachel Berry could teach him a thing or two about storming off.
But then he blinked and realized that the comments were aimed at himself, and he felt slightly stricken.
"Oh…" he murmured dazedly. "I mean…I … wow. I guess there's nothing like telling it like it is."
Wes and Blaine were staring at each other in surprise, but Wes started scowling.
"Ignore him, Kurt. He's being completely and inappropriately overprotective of us. We've been through a lot in the last few years."
Had they been targets for every single school bully too? Had they been tossed into dumpsters like they were trash, locked into porter potties and had slushies thrown at them? He hoped not.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, feeling tears that he hadn't cried in such a long time spring to his eyes. "I'm sorry I stopped coming to see you. I just… I have no excuses other than that my life was just out of control for a while. I should have been here. He's right."
"Kurt," Blaine said with a weary sigh. "I appreciate the apology, but don't be a martyr. We could have tried to keep in contact just as well as you."
"Don't cry," Wes added softly. "I hate it when you cry Kurt. It makes me sad too. A couple of harsh words and a few years couldn't keep us from being friends. We're meant for something great, I know it. Always have."
He looked at both of them with awe and felt an overwhelming feeling of peace and love come flooding into him. Suddenly, and without warning, the self-inflicted dam burst, and he could feel his face promptly crumple and tears just started pouring out. He was so overcome that he didn't even have time to be embarrassed.
Kurt could feel their shocked gazes and he tried to rein it in, thankful that no one else was here to witness this (most others having already gone off to their dorms for break or to their next classes), to no avail.
"Oh my gosh," he chocked out, "I'm sorry. I can't … *hiccup*…"
"Kurt, is everything okay?" Blaine asked worriedly.
Wes was looking as though he thought Kurt was being possessed.
"No," he confessed through a sob. "Nothing is ever okay, and here I am crying like a freakin baby about it because I can't handle it. No wonder people hate me."
"Hate you…?" Wes asked, voice sharp and surprised.
"You guys haven't really spent a lot of time in Lima lately have you? " he whispered, finally managing to stop the tears and wiped furiously at this eyes with his jacket sleeve. "I know…that we all know that Blaine and I are gay… but I feel like we lived in some kind of fairytale land when we were growing up. I'm sure things haven't been a walk in the part for you either, Blaine, but in Lima the hate is just… so strong. I've never wanted to just run away and be someone else more than these last few years."
Scrubbing fiercely at his eyes, he waited silently for them to say something. He expected them to be angry with him, because here he was using them for comfort. They probably thought he was here for some sort of emotional validation, and not to renew their friendship.
That was not even including the whole glee thing. He knew he couldn't go there, not now. He needed them too much to do something that might potentially drive them away.
"Kurt, are you being bullied?" Wes asked in a dangerously quiet voice.
He snorted, "Yes."
"Have you told someone?"
"Yes. No one cares. I mean, Dad cares and my friends do, but no one really does anything about it. Especially the teachers and the principal. Its too much work to defend the only out gay kid in the school," he said bitterly.
Kurt," Blaine said suddenly, voice shaky, reaching out to grab his hand and squeeze it tightly. "Never think that this is okay. Never. You are so incredible, beautiful and smart and deserve so much more than a bunch of homophobic bullies hurting you. I haven't… been bullied here at Dalton, but I have run into some of it out in public. And like you, no one really cared. It was like 'okay, you're gay, that's great. Take care of yourself.' I just let it happen and I didn't do anything. I didn't stand up for myself. I will never stop regretting that. There's something you can do Kurt."
He blinked up at him and tilted his head, sniffling.
"Teach them, Kurt. Teach them that what they're doing is wrong before it's too late to learn. Show them that they're being ignorant and how amazing you are."
He flicked his eyes to Wes, who nodded, and reached out for his other hand.
"You can do it Kurt. And now that you're here, we're never letting you get away again. Those assholes don't realize what an amazing friend they're not getting the chance to have. And we'll be here to talk when things aren't going your way."
He bit his lip, and tried to smile. They obviously did not quite understand what bullying meant for him, or how difficult what they were telling him to do would be. But he found that he didn't care. They were friends again, and that was all that mattered. All he needed.
"I'll be here too," he said, voice growing stronger. "I'll do everything I can to make up for abandoning you. I promise you."
"Okay," Blaine said, "I think this calls for a hug."
Kurt rubbed his eyes again and raised an eyebrow at him.
Wes gave a pained sigh.
"Best to do as he says or he'll wine about the lack of hugs for days and days until we just have no other choice but to give in."
Blaine stood up and beckoned to them to join him. Kurt couldn't help the slight giggle that escaped him as he stood and tentatively moved to place himself into an awkward side hug with Blaine. Wes did the same.
"You guuuys," Blaine said in annoyance as he squished them into his embrace. "That is not a hug. Hugs are all about feeling and releasing tension. Do it!"
He was full out giggling now and he couldn't stop, and all awkwardness faded away as he wrapped his arms around them quickly. It lasted for a good 10 seconds until Wes began to squirm and then pushed them away.
"Okay, girly moment over," he said, stepping away from the reach of Blaine's arms. "No more crying, Kurt Hummel. It doesn't suit you. And Blaine, no more hugs for like a whole month, got it?"
"You know you love to hug," Blaine teased back.
Kurt was grinning wildly and for a moment it felt like he'd never been anywhere but here, with the best friends he'd always known.
He left Dalton Academy feeling stronger than he had in months.