Jan. 27, 2013, 5:46 p.m.
Tips Of Roses: Chapter 2
M - Words: 1,367 - Last Updated: Jan 27, 2013 Story: Closed - Chapters: 31/? - Created: May 30, 2012 - Updated: Jan 27, 2013 1,263 0 1 0 0
Three days after Blaine leapt into his life, Kurt stands at his locker before school and thinks.
Things were better.
Things were worse.
Blaine hasn't left Kurt alone since that first day. Kurt's phone goes off every few minutes with a picture message or a text or a phone call. Even during school. And between classes, Blaine latches onto Kurt's side like an overenthusiastic puppy, chattering about a new band or movie Kurt absolutely, positively has to see otherwise it could be a crime.
He doesn't mind that Kurt is silent more often than not. He just winks and brushes their fingers together every few seconds.
Mercedes and Rachel haven't left him alone either. If Blaine wasn't there, they were. And all they could talk about was Blaine Anderson hanging out with Kurt Hummel and does he like Kurt? Does Kurt like him? Is he really gay? Can he sing? Why was he kicked out of his old school? Is he on drugs? Is Kurt taking drugs now too?
Mercedes thinks he's bad news and dangerous and that Kurt should stay away.
Rachel thinks he and Blaine could have a tragically romantic love story and when Blaine breaks Kurt's heart, Kurt can pen a chart topper and make millions.
Sometimes Kurt wants to scream.
But he doesn't know what Blaine wants.
It couldn't be him.
Who would be so desperate to want him?
A flamboyant kid built more like a girl than a bodybuilder? A boy so gay that even the most ignorant idiot's gaydar would go crazy within fifteen feet?
Someone so unsexy?
Someone with no experience?
No, Blaine just wanted a friend. And was probably flirting for practice.
But it still hurt when his friends assumed.
Kurt cries out when a shoulder checks him into the locker. With his breath knocked out of him, Kurt can barely remember to hold himself up. He looks up with a glare, only to see Karofsky's back walking away. Kurt suddenly wishes for a freak meteor to hit that huge, hulking mass of boy. Karofsky turns back and Kurt's blood drains from his face. Karofsky's eyes hold a frightening mix of emotions: anger, hatred, disgust. And in small traces: lust.
Kurt turns away, shaking. He feels his cold mask slip on as he trades out the books he'll need for the morning. He was seeing things. He had to be.
The bullying has escalated. More shoves, more trips, more namecalling. But never in sight of Blaine.
Kurt doesn't understand it.
"Hey!"
Looking up, Kurt sees Blaine practically running his way with a huge smile on his face. One day, he will understand how Blaine Anderson sees the world. Like a child does. For Blaine, every day is an adventure; full of wonder and mystery and beauty.
Kurt wishes he could, too.
"Hey, you," Kurt offers a small smile as Blaine stops next to his locker. David Karofsky is pushed far away to the back of his mind. He shuts his locker and eyes Blaine's outfit. "Do you own anything other than that ratty old jacket?" He wrinkles his nose as if in disgust. Kurt actually loved the jacket. It was very Blaine. But Blaine was rather attached to it and it was fun to tease him.
Sure enough, Blaine's face falls into a pout. "Why you gotta hate, you hater?" He crosses his arms and hugs the jacket to himself. Kurt simply raises an eyebrow and walks away. But he's caught.
Blaine lets out a laugh and runs to catch up. "Ha! I knew it! You totally love the jacket, don't you?"
"I have no idea what you are talking about."
"Bullshit, I can see that smile!" Blaine steps in front of Kurt. He pokes Kurt's face. "Come on, smile!"
Kurt swats Blaine's finger away with a short laugh. It hurts. He hasn't laughed in a long time.
But Blaine is tugging on his sleeve and dragging Kurt to their first class. AP US History. And Kurt follows, giggling and stretching old muscles he's almost forgotten how to use.
He doesn't see David Karofsky's murderous face as they fly by.
The next week, Kurt sits in Glee club after school, pretending to listen to Rachel talk about solos and Santana boast about yet another sexual conquest from the local mall. He thinks about Blaine.
Blaine, who is sitting right next to him.
Blaine, who has an arm around the back of his chair and is chatting with Mike.
He still didn't know why Blaine insisted on coming. Blaine said something about wanting to hear Kurt sing. Kurt warned him it might be a couple weeks, what with the way Finn and Rachel hog the microphone. Blaine just smirked and told Kurt that wasn't an excuse.
Four meetings in, Kurt hadn't sung. Neither had Blaine. They come in, sit down, and then Blaine is pulled into a conversation with Mike, Artie, and Puck, and Mercedes and Tina claim Kurt and Rachel just yells at everyone while Santana alternates between flirting with Brittany and insulting anyone that looks at her. Quinn shoots jealous looks at Finn and Finn just smiles and nods at everything that comes out of Rachel's mouth and Mr. Schue moans about Ms. Pillsbury and Carl.
Kurt turns away from Mercedes and Rachel's verbal sparring and watches Blaine.
Blaine uses his hands when he talks. It's like he can't sit still. And the optimism. He has so much it should be annoying, but no.
Kurt wonders if he could learn to be like that. Less jaded, at least.
He wants to sing.
Kurt almost falls off his chair. He wants to sing. He hadn't for weeks, letting Rachel take over and fading into the background.
But right now?
He is going to sing.
"Shut up, Rachel."
She stops talking, shocked. She should be. Kurt hadn't spoken more than a few words to her for weeks and never in that tone. It sounds like the old Kurt.
"I want to sing."
Everyone stares. Even Mr. Schue, who looks like a piglet had suddenly leapt into the room and started tap dancing. But Blaine just beams. Kurt stands up. His knees are suddenly shaky and walking to the center of the room and facing all of his friends is the most terrifying thing he has ever had to do.
He clears his throat. "Um, Puck, can you come here?" Kurt tries to calm his nerves. He knows what song he's using.
After Puck hears the song, he gives Kurt a long look, but pulls up a stool and takes an acoustic guitar from one of the band guys. He gives a nod when he's ready.
Kurt takes a calming breath.
"Hey." His voice cracks and Kurt swallows hard. "I haven't sung in a while. I haven't felt the need to." Kurt looks into everyone's eyes. Some are worried, some are confused, some are hurt. A few look guilty. Blaine is studying him, a small frown on his face. Kurt continues. "Life's been hard for awhile. But I think I'm going to be okay." Kurt lets his gaze linger on Blaine before nodding to Puck.
He opens his mouth.
"Many is the time I've been mistaken,
And many times confused."
Kurt closes his eyes, feeling all of his tension and fear and hopelessness wash out of him with his voice and the soothing lyrics.
"Yes, and often felt forsaken,
And certainly misused,
But I'm all right, I'm all right,
I'm just weary to my bones."
He thinks he hears Finn come in on the drums, softly. Kurt smiles to himself
"And I dreamed I was flying…"
He sings on, pouring his heart into the words and forgetting the rest of the world for a few minutes. Kurt is tired. He is just so tired of living but he knows he'll make it.
"And I'm trying to get some rest
That's all, I'm trying to get some rest."
Kurt lets the last note trail off into silence, meeting Blaine's pensive hazel eyes. He hardly hears the smattering of applause and Rachel's hushed proclamation that if Kurt sings that song at Regionals, she'll give up a solo. As he sits back down, blushing at all the attention, he prepares to do damage control with Mercedes. She clearly isn't happy with not noticing Kurt's depression.
He feels Blaine slip a hand into his. As he fingers the slightly calloused pads and Blaine strokes the back of his hand, Kurt sucks in a breath. He squeezed Blaine's hand at his revelation.
One day, Kurt thinks, he'll be alright.
He just needs some rest.
Comments
Eeep! I love your story.Please, don't every stop writting it! ;)