What the hell am I even doing? I cant write, I dont know anything about writing and this club, let alone about Kurt, and today after school... is my first meeting with them. God, I hope I wont screw up, I really want to get to know him more. Before I even realize it, the bell is ringing and with it ends the last lesson for me today. Its time.

I breath in and out and try to imagine what it might be like – meeting those few kids that are in Kurts club, but dont care about writing. I dont want to be like them. I want to be useful for him, so he wants me in his club and then we can be friends...

But thats the problem. I cant write.

I quickly pack my stuff into my bag and head outside of the classroom. Im the last one to come out. I look at the map of the school that I printed yesterday and look for the... Hell, I dont even know where that meeting is supposed to be. Shit.

I got an idea – I run to the wall where Kurt pinned that paper earlier today and I smile when I see the exact number of the classroom I need to find. Now all I need to do is find it in my map and go there.

Kurt slash Carson, Im coming for you.

xoXOXox

The classroom is empty when I come in. Well, thats until I see Kurts hair behind the desk, it looks like hes looking for something in his bag... wait, does this mean that were alone? No, nope, Im not excited at all, Im perfectly fine, just keep calm...

“Hi,” I say when I come closer. Within a second I hear a loud gasp and Kurts head is suddenly looking at me. 

“Geez!” He says loudly, “You scared me!”

“Im sorry, I didnt mean to,” I quickly apologize. After a few seconds, he returns his attention back on some papers that hes probably put out of his bag.

“Youre early,” he says, still looking at those papers. “No one is ever here on time, they all come late, or not at all.”

“Yeah, thats bad,” I reply, not sure what to say next. “What are those?” I ask, pointing at the papers hes holding.

“My articles that I wrote yesterday. As I said, those shitheads dont do anything but complain that I care too much, I have to write everything on my own.” He then puts them aside and sits on the chair. He lays his torso on the desk and stops talking. I know hes waiting for the other members to arrive and hes probably sad that Im the only one who showed up, but he looks so adorable in this position, seriously.

“Hey, Carson,” Someone says from the door. Kurt and I look up. Its a blonde girl with a really high ponytail on the top of her head. Shes wearing a pink t-shirt and has a bag over her shoulder. Shes also holding a camera.

“Hey, Malerie,” Kurt says and he smiles. This time I can see that his smile is genuine, the girls probably his good friend.

She looks at me and goes closer with the camera. She points it on my head and looks through it. I smile slightly. “Who... is that?” She asks and points the camera lower... and lower.

“Are you shooting my butt?” I ask a bit uncomfortably. I hear Kurt chuckle.

“Maybe,” she smiles. “Im Malerie.”

“Blaine.”

She finally turns to Kurt and says, “I wrote another short story for the chronicle.” Kurt nods and stands up.

“Great, lets hear it,” he says and sits on the desk.

“Its um... this one,” she smiles slightly and points on a journal on the table. “I think youre gonna like it. Its probably my best one.” From Kurts face I can see that he doesnt expect, well... anything. Malerie puts the camera down and starts. “Call me Ishmael. Some years ago-” Kurts expression changes into a bored and a bit annoyed one. Its clear that he doesnt really want her to continue. She does, nevertheless, “- Never mind how long precisely-”

“Malerie,” Kurt stops her and rolls his eyes. Malerie looks up.”Did you really write this?”

“No,” She says and sighs. “You saw right through me. Im a complete disappointment.”

“Im sure youre not,” I say. I kinda feel bad for her. Kurt looks at me, then back at her.

“And dont be so hard on yourself.” He says. “I mean, writing takes time. Your own words would help too.” 

“But I cant think of any ideas myself.” She says sadly. Shes exactly like me, she wants to write, but she just cant. “Like, I have no imagination.” She adds. “All God blessed me with was this flawless complexion and really good table tennis skills. Im like... asian good.” Kurt smirks. “How do you do it?” She asks finally. Great, I have the same question. I really dont want to disappoint him.

I look at Kurt. “I... uh, well,” he hesitates, trying to think of what to tell her, “d-dont try to find the ideas.” He looks at Malerie again. “Let the ideas find you.” He smiles slightly. 

Suddenly the intercom says across the whole building, “Attention student council members. Theres a meeting in the activities office.” Kurt seems annoyed again.

“God,” he utters. “They only have these meetings when they think Ive gone home.” He takes his bag and puts it over his shoulder. “The jokes on them. I never go home.”

“Yeah,” Malerie laughs. “either do I, cause homes overrated. So is m&ms world. Seriously,” she mumbles.

Kurt opens the door and suddenly hes gone. And then it hits me. No one came to the meeting, the meetings over. I quickly grab my stuff, say bye to Malerie and run out of the room. As soon as I catch up with Kurt I say, “Wait, so thats it?” I ask, “The meetings over?”

He doesnt stop walking, he just looks at me. “Yes, that was it. See? No one came, everybody hates this club, because everybody hates me.”

I dont. 

“Okay,” I say sadly. “Um, so when is the next meeting?” He stops and looks at me.

“Well, it should be tomorrow, but you never know wholl come. Or rather who wont come.”

“Thats awful, I mean, you said that writing takes time, that its hard. It cant be easy to see everyone elses disinterest.” I smile at him briefly, sad. Its just not fair, I want him to have at least someone who cares about him apart from Malerie. I care about him. I wont be a disappointment. 

“Yeah, thats just the way it is.” He sighs. “Look, Id rather be tortured than go to that meeting, but I have to go there. And at least I can laugh in their faces when they see me there, so... bye.” He says and quickly walks away.

“Yeah, bye!” I call after him, but in that moment he disappears behind a corner.

Well, that meeting really didnt go the way I thought it would. But, hey, at least I saw Kurts smile for the first time. And Im willing to do anything to see that lovely smile again, so Im going to try harder than ever before and Im going to write him the best story that he has ever read.

With that, I go home.