The Grasshopper Brigade
Milly
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Milly

Feb. 1, 2013, 3:30 p.m.


The Grasshopper Brigade: December 6th


T - Words: 3,900 - Last Updated: Feb 01, 2013
Story: Complete - Chapters: 49/49 - Created: Nov 04, 2012 - Updated: Apr 12, 2022
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December 6

 

Rachel.

Loverboy.

I am freaking out.

Why are you freaking out?

Because I just realized that Christmas is only 19 days from today.

And I have no idea what I’m going to get for Kurt.

And it’s really important because it’s our first Christmas.

And I don’t want him to be disappointed.

Yeah, so? (unsent)

I can help (unsent)

Yeah, I understand (unsent)

SERIOUSLY!

I’ve told people I’m not the only one

I’ve tried to reply to you like three times already

and you keep sending texts

seriously!

okay

It’s normal to freak out.  Kurt’s a hard person to shop for because he’s so in tune with the world of shopping

Sorry.  And I know.  I mean, I think I should have saved the snowflake thing or something, because I can’t top myself.  I have no idea what to get for him.  Suggestions?

I’m glad you didn’t save the snowflake thing

Because you and Kurt probably wouldn’t be together without it

Umm... clothes are a no go.  He loves clothes.  He picks his own wardrobe

Okay.  Noted.  What about like... tickets for something?

If there’s a good show on Broadway, he’d like that.  Those are expensive, though

Come on, I’m asking for help here... I’m brain dead.

Oh, Blaine.  Poor, naive Blaine.  Gift cards.  Scarf or hat.  There’s that book he mentioned a while back.  But I wanted to get that for him.

Okay... I was hoping for more of a showstopper. (unsent)

Okay.  Thanks for the suggestions.

You’re welcome :D Glad I could help!

 

Kurt, you are so hard to shop for. (unsent)

What’s your favorite show on Broadway right now? (unsent)

How do you feel about cashmere scarves? (unsent)

Hi.

Blainey!  Hi!

How’s your day going?

Pretty good

Can’t wait for us to go carolling this evening :D

I know!  I was thinking we could do some cute ones with the traditional ones too.

That would be awesome

Are Rachel and Brody going to be okay with cutsy songs?

I’m sure they will be.  They’re pretty cutsy themselves

Good!  I think we should steal Baby It’s Cold Outside though.  And Santa Baby.

Oh yes.  They are not stealing our song from us.  Or Santa Baby

Will you let me wear my elf hat?

Ugh, do you really have to wear an elf hat?

It’s green!  And has ears on the side of it.  And a bell.

You just made my decision so much easier

Can I wear it after we go caroling then?

Wanna spend the night at my house tonight?

maybe (unsent)

ohdeargodpleaseyes

I didn’t think you liked the hat.

I hate the hat.  I haven’t even seen it yet and I hate it

So, you like the idea of spending the night then... you’re gonna get the hat too.

[silence]

No hat?

No hat

What about... just... the hat?

[silence]

Just the hat.

[silence]

Just a towel?

[silence]

Mhm.  Just a towel, I think.  Steamy bathroom.  No gel.

[silence]

Kurt.

[silence]

Kuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrttttttttttttt

[silence]

Kurt.  I am standing outside of the Vogue building and I’m going to come up and find your office, which I’ll remind you that I have that office number and everything because of the snowflakes, and I will find you and make this even more fun.

[silence]

I’m serious.  Look outside.  I’m walking in.  I just waved.

[silence]

Several minutes later, Blaine finally arrives at the correct floor, and starts down the hall.  Having never been here before, he starts asking people which way to Kurt’s office.

“Excuse me, I’m looking for Kurt Hummel.”

One of the interns points down the hall, giving Blaine the office number.

“Thank you!”

Blaine’s voice is practically sing-song as he thanks the intern, and heads down the hall toward the office.  He absently sings ‘Everything,’ waving at people in their offices, and through the glass walls of one lady with long blonde hair.  He finds the correct office and peeks in, still singing.

Kurt, having gotten more embarrassed at every text that came in, sits at his desk, looking at his emails on his computer.  He looks up when he hears a familiar voice singing.

“You didn’t...”

“You didn’t tell me not to.”

“I’m at work, Blaine.  I can’t...”

“You can’t what?  Have a visit from your boyfriend that brought you flowers?”

Blaine steps into full view, revealing and presenting a small bouquet of brightly colored daisies.

“Daisies?  Innocence and purity?  Really?  I have a meeting in fifteen.”

“I don’t know.  They were pretty.  And bright.  They reminded me of you.”

Blaine’s expression falls a bit.

“I’m sorry...”

Kurt stands up and quickly walks around his desk, reaching Blaine and hugging him tightly.

“I love them.  I really do.  And I’m glad you came to rescue me from emails and meetings.”

“Yeah?”

“Of course.”

“Good.  So.  Elf hat?”

“No.”

Kurt is unable to keep a straight face.

Blaine lowers his voice and smirks a little.

“Towel?”

Kurt’s eyes glaze over a bit.

“F-fine.”

“Do you want me to leave?”

“Not really, but I mean, this is my workplace.  And I have to prep for my meeting.”

“Booooring.  But.  Caroling.  I’ll meet you at your place at like, 7?”

“Sounds like a plan.  Thank you for the flowers.”

Kurt kisses Blaine gently.

Blaine kisses Kurt in return, then wrapping the other into a hug, and whispering close to his ear.

“Seriously.  Steamy.  Shower.  Towel.  Wet hair.  Elf hat.”

He backs away then.

“Something to think about.”

“... Not... Fair...”

“So fair.”

“I am getting you for this.”

Blaine offers Kurt a pleading look.

“Please.”

“Wear the darned elf hat.  Just not in public.”

“That was easy.”

“You’re evil.”

“Guilty.”

“Bye Blaine.”

“See you tonight, Kurtlet.”

Blaine offers Kurt a wink and a smirk, and he turns to leave.

Kurt shakes his head and goes back to sit behind his desk.

 

Blaine knocks on Kurt and Rachel’s door at exactly seven o’clock.

Rachel answers the door, looking a little flustered.

“Blaine.  Hi.  Come in.  Kurt, Blaine’s here.”

Blaine steps into the apartment and closes the door behind him, trying to judge whether or not to take off his coat and scarf.  He watches Rachel, curious as to why she’s not as bouncy and excited as she usually is.

“Hey.  Should I go find him, or...”

“Hey Blaine.  Wanna come help me with something for a moment?”

“Sure.”

Unbuttoning his coat, Blaine crosses to Kurt, his brain fighting with itself over what expression his face should make.

Kurt glances over at Rachel and huddles as close to Blaine as possible, speaking under his breath.

“Brody cancelled last minute.  Rach was looking forward to the four of us doing this...”

“Oh, that explains her whole... whatever that is thing she has going on.  Also, I dunno if this is a good time, but do you wanna see my hat?”

“Yeah... and... not particularly... yes.”

Blaine beams at Kurt, trying to keep out of Rachel’s line of sight.  He pulls a green velvety hat, trimmed in white, with a white tip, a bell sewn to the very end.  Pointed elf ears are sewn onto the sides as well, and he smirks at it for a second, before sliding it over his perfectly gelled hair and looks up at Kurt.

“I hate it.  It’s tacky.  But it looks hot on you.  Save it for later.”

Blaine lets out something that sounds like a giggle and takes the hat off, shoving it back in his pocket.  His hair is slightly out of place, but he doesn’t notice.

“I need to fix your hair.”

“What?  What are you talking about?”

“It’s all messed up from the hat.”

Blaine’s face contorts to slight panic.

“Kurt, do you have any gel?”

“What do you think?”

“Oh my god, Kurt, we need gel.”

Eyes wide, Blaine hurries to the bathroom, where he looks into the mirror with horror on his face.  He tries a little bit of water, but it’s not working.

Kurt follows Blaine to the bathroom, amused.

“There’s no gel, Blaine.  You might as well face it.  Tonight you’re going out without it.”

“No, no I can’t.  I can fix it.”

Unfortunately, his hair is already starting to curl in the spots where the water had washed the gel out.

“You can do it, Blaine.  It’ll be alright.”

“I’m not prepared for this, Kurt.  I’m not prepared.  I need the gel.  I can’t go out without it.  I didn’t bring an actual hat, and I won’t embarrass you with the elf one.  Are you sure you don’t have any?”

“I’ve told you since day one, I hate hair gel.  So no.  I have hairspray, though.”

Blaine stares at his hair in the mirror, horrified.

“It’s... It won’t work.”

“Are you two ready or am I going to have to go out by myself?”

Rachel sounds irritated.

“Come on, Blaine.  It’s going to be alright.”

Blaine is almost in tears, but he nods and bends down, washing all of the rest of the gel out of his hair.

“I need a towel.”

Looking sympathetic, Kurt grabs a clean towel and hands it to Blaine.

Taking the towel from Kurt, Blaine shuts off the water, and rubs the towel through his hair, dreading what it’s going to look like when he’s done.  He stands upright, lowering the towel and setting it on the edge of the sink as he looks at his reflection.  He sighs, absolutely hating the curls that seem like they’re mocking him.

“I wasn’t ready for this.”

“You look fine, Blainey.  The curls are attractive.  Come on.”

“Promise me... from a fashion sense, as my style consultant, that if they start to look terrible, you’ll tell me.”

“I will.  Promise.  Pinky promise.  Now, we should really go before Rachel has a cow.”

“I’m leaving.”

“We-we’re coming.”

Blaine, complete with an excruciatingly worried look on his face, exits the bathroom and heads for the door, picking up his coat along the way and putting it back on, and not meeting eyes with anyone.

Kurt follows Blaine out of the bathroom and shoots a pointed look at Rachel from behind Blaine.  She gets the hint and doesn’t comment on Blaine’s hair.  Kurt puts his coat on and links arms with Blaine.

“Let’s go sing some carols.”

“Can we bring a flask?”

“I’m sorry?”

“Just... this would be easier... maybe...”

Blaine is just about panicking as he stands there, fidgeting with his coat’s hem, trying to stay calm.

“We are not bringing... that... with us.  Your hair looks fine, Blaine.”

Biting his lip, Blaine nods, hardly breathing.

Kurt lightly kisses Blaine’s cheek to try to get him to relax

Blaine glances up at Kurt and tries to smile.

“Let’s just go, before I change my mind.”

“Alright.  You can do it, sweetie.”
“I’m sure you’re right, but I feel like I’m going to throw up.”

“Please don’t throw up all over my new coat.”

“I can control my gag reflex, thank you.  I’m just nervous.”

“I know you can.”

“Oh god, you guys, I don’t need to hear about your bedroom lives.”

Blaine smirks up at Kurt, momentarily distracted from his hair issues.

“Sorry, Rachel.”

“Yeah.  Sorry Rach.”

Kurt smirks back at Blaine.

His eyes sliding to the side, Blaine continues smirking, his mind wandering a bit.

“We should go.”

“We should.”

“Finally.  I’ve been waiting.”

Blaine squeezes his arm around Kurt’s, and pulls him toward the door, holding his other arm out for Rachel.

“If you take my arm, Miss Berry, I’ll have the two loveliest creatures in this city as my dates tonight.”

“You are such a goof.  The two of you.  Seriously.”

Rachel takes the offered arm and walks with the two men out of the apartment.

Once out on the street, Blaine glances around.

“Alright, lovelies.  Where to, and what are we going to sing first?”

“We-”

“We should go to Madison Square Park.  And you two should do Baby It’s Cold Outside!”

“Rachel, that sounds perfect.  Kurt, what do you think?”

“I love it.  Let’s do it.  I’m surprised you’re letting us sing first, Rach.”

“I actually am too.  You feeling alright?”

Blaine pulls his dates toward the park.

“I’m fine.”

Kurt shoots Blaine a quick warning glance.

Blaine immediately shuts up and tries to change the subject.

“Anyway, Baby It’s Cold Outside is my favorite song.”

“It’s mine too.  It was my favourite song even before we sang it together.”

“It was my second favorite.”

“What was your favourite?”

“Haven’t Met You Yet.”

“Oh, if we’re talking about songs in general, then Baby It’s Cold Outside ranked in at around number three.”

“What were one and two?”

“Not the Boy Next Door and Let’s Have a Kiki.”

“Those fit you perfectly.  And I’d love to hear you sing Not the Boy Next Door.”

“Maybe you will one day.  Gold pants and all.”

Blaine raises his eyebrows and smirks at Kurt.

“You want to borrow my elf hat?”

“Not a chance.”

“Would you two stop it?”

“Sorry, Rach, but my elf hat is amazing.”

“Yeah, right, your elf hat.  We’re here.  Sing together, have fun.”

Blaine glances at Rachel and mutters to Kurt.

“Is she going to be like this all night?”

“I don’t know.  I’m kind of holding out for her to get happy singing.”

“In that case, go.”

Kurt grins and launches into the first line.

“I really can’t stay.”

“But baby, it’s cold outside.”

“I’ve got to go away.”

“But, baby, it’s cold outside.”

“This evening has been so very nice.”

“Was hoping that you’d drop in.  I’ll hold your hands, they’re just like ice.”

Kurt grins and acts flirty with Blaine throughout the rest of the song as they attract a bit of an audience.

The last line is sung in unison, and Blaine looks at Kurt while singing to the few people that have gathered around to listen and watch.

Kurt performs an elaborate stage bow to their audience.

Blaine’s laughter can be heard over the light applause and he smiles at Kurt’s bow.

“We really do make the best duet team.”

“We definitely do.  Rach, want a turn?”

“Rachel, sing Santa Baby with me?”

“Fine.”

Kurt stands to the side while Rachel steps up to stand next to Blaine.

Blaine casts a look in Kurt’s direction, hoping that this works to get Rachel out of her mood.

“Santa baby, slip a sable under the tree for me.

I’ve been an awfully good girl

Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight.”

“Santa baby, an out-of-space convertible too, light blue

I'll wait up for you dear

Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight”

“Think of all the fun I've missed

Think of all the fellas that I haven't kissed

Next year I could be oh-so good

If you check off my Christmas list”

Blaine makes a check mark in the air toward Rachel and smiles wide at her.

Rachel rolls her eyes and fakes a smile for the audience as they finish the song, with less energy than she normally puts into singing.

Blaine offers the audience an equally fake smile, and nods as they clap for the duet.  He then steps over to Kurt.

“I’m not doing this anymore if she’s going to be like this.”

“I know, I’m not really feeling this either.  Rach, can I talk to you for a minute?”

“I’m not having fun.  I’m going back to the apartment.”

Without giving her friends time to speak, Rachel walks off, shoulders hunched over.  As she walks, she pulls out her phone.

“Um... okay...?”

“I... Um...”

Blaine glances out at the people who are looking at them expectantly.

“The show must go on?”

“Yeah.  Um... Let It Snow?”

“Well, the weather outside is frightful.”

“But the fire is so delightful.”

“And since we’ve no place to go,”

Kurt smiles and has fun as they continue the song.  They finish to loud applause.

Blaine’s smile stretches across his face.

“This totally reminds me of being in the Warblers.”

“Really?”

“I was having flashbacks there.  I feel like singing something other than Christmas songs though.”

“Maybe it’s time to head back to your apartment.”

“Maybe.”

“I really want to.”

“Can I sing to you along the way?”

“I’d really like that.  Let’s goooooo.”

Kurt drags Blaine off in the direction of his apartment.

Blaine follows after Kurt, but starts whistling staccato notes, and then starts humming the tune to ‘Whistle.’

Can you blow my whistle baby, whistle baby...”

He’s now in front of Kurt, singing like he’s home alone and in the shower, beckoning Kurt to keep following him with his hands.

Kurt laughs and glances to the side, trying to hide the light blush on his cheeks.

Blaine continues singing, and reaches up, literally carefree, and ruffles his own hair, making sure to make every attempt to maintain eye contact with Kurt.

“Glad to see you’re relaxing about that.”

“Shhh.  Just let it happen.”

“Alright.”

Blaine changes his song abruptly to ‘Teenage Dream.’

“Really?”

“Ima get your heart racing in my skin tight jeans

Be your teenage dream tonight

Let you put your hands on me in my skin tight jeans

Be your teenage dream tonight”

“You really mean that?  I’m excited now!”

Blaine smiles and raises his eyebrows, continuing his song.

“Youuu make me feel like I’m livin’ a teenage dream

the way you turn me on, I can’t sleep.

Let’s run away and don’t ever look back, don’t ever look back, no”

“I would like that.”

“My heart stops when you look at me

Just one touch, now baby I believe

This is real so take a chance and

Don't ever look back, don't ever look back.”

“Okay, I think I get the picture.  Here we are.  You can go put on your stupid hat.  And you promised me a towel.”

Blaine blinks innocently.

“Why, whatever do you mean?  Sir, you expect me to have a shower while you’re in my apartment?”

“What about with me in your shower?”

“I might consider that.  Will it be steamy?”

“Depends on how hot it is.”

“It can get pretty hot.”

Blaine unlocks the door to his apartment.

“I guess we’ll have to wait and see.”

Pushing the door open, Blaine unbuttons his coat and motions for Kurt to go inside.

“Wait.  Yes.  Waiting.”

Kurt smirks and walks in, unbuttoning his coat and laying it carefully to the side.

“Shall we?”

Blaine closes the door behind himself and stares at Kurt, dropping his own coat right on the floor, but not before pulling out the hat from his pocket.

“Oh, we shall.”

He smirks then, walking past Kurt and toward the bathroom.

Kurt smirks and follows Blaine eagerly.

“You know, maybe you should wait for me in my bedroom.”

“But... steamy shower...”

“I have a better idea.”

“Do tell.”

Blaine pulls Kurt close and kisses below his ear.

“Oh, it’s a surprise.  You wait for me, okay?”

Kurt shivers and nods.

“Kay.”

He goes to sit on the couch, staring towards the bathroom.

Blaine disappears into the bathroom, the shower starts, and a quick five minutes later, it turns off.  There’s some rustling, and finally the door opens again, a massive roll of steam billowing out.  Blaine stands there, hand running through his wet hair, and droplets of water rolling down his chest, wearing simply a dark blue towel around his waist.  In his hand is his elf hat.  He looks at Kurt.

Kurt can only stare.

“Ohdeargodpleaseyes.”

Blaine bites his bottom lip on purpose and smirks at Kurt, reaching out with his free hand as he walks toward his bedroom, and motioning with one finger for Kurt to join him.

Kurt gets up and practically runs after Blaine.

As soon as Kurt is through the door, Blaine pulls him close, both of his hands on Kurt’s face, pressing into a kiss.  He pulls away then, turning and looking out the window, hands on his hips.

Kurt presses into the kiss, starting to wrap his arms around Blaine.  When Blaine pulls away, he pouts and steps closer.

“What are you doing?”

“Hmm?  Oh, I’m sorry, did you want something?”

Blaine looks over his shoulder, which is still wet, before turning completely around to face Kurt.

“Just put the damn hat on, I know you want to.  And kiss me.  For real.”

“I like it when you tell me what to do.”

Blaine leans down, glancing up at Kurt before sliding the hat on his head and standing up again.  He raises one eyebrow and stalks over to the other, slipping wet arms around Kurt’s waist and pressing his lips against Kurt’s.

Kurt leans into Blaine, kissing back and letting his hands roam across Blaine’s back.

Blaine pulls at Kurt’s shirt, obviously wanting it out of the way.

Kurt takes off his shirt, immediately going back to kissing Blaine.

Blaine lets his fingertips run across Kurt’s back, leaning down and kissing in a line from his ear down his neck and to his shoulder.  The end of the elf hat falls down and the little bell lets off a jingle.

“Your stupid hat fell.”

“You said I could wear it.  Do you... want me to take it off?”

Raising an eyebrow, Blaine smirks at Kurt.

“Just... yes...”

Blaine reaches up and slides off his elf hat, loose curls, still wet, falling down over his forehead.

“Better?”

“Yes.”

“I liked the hat though.”

“Too bad.  I hate it.”

“How do you feel about the towel?”

“I kinda wish it was gone too.”

“Sorry, that’s not how it works.”

“Seriously?”

Blaine turns away from Kurt, walking across the room with no purpose.

“Seriously.”

Kurt follows Blaine across the room.

“Stop teasing.”

He attempts to use his authoritative voice, but fails.

“I’m sorry, Kurt, but I just can’t do that.”

Kurt pouts behind Blaine’s back.

“Rude.”

Blaine smirks over his shoulder at Kurt.

“Sorry I’m not sorry.”

“Should I just go then?”
Kurt smirks.

“Is that what you want?”

Blaine half-turns around, hands on his hips, his fingers playing with the edge of the towel.

Kurt’s breath hitches.

“Please.”

“Oh, I dunno.  I don’t think you’re trying hard enough.”

“What do I have to do?”

“Let’s see what you can come up with.”

“Pretty please?”

“Begging?”

“Ordering didn’t work.”

“Give me something to work with here.  Put some... oomf... into it.”

Kurt raises an eyebrow at Blaine and walks up to him, holding his shoulders and kissing his collarbone.

“Mhm.”

Blaine tilts his head back and exhales, resisting the urge to let Kurt take control.

Kurt continues kissing and lightly nipping along Blaine’s collarbone.

Biting his lip, Blaine presses into Kurt.

“There you go.”

“More where that came from...”

Kurt’s hands wander around to the small of Blaine’s back.

Blaine’s fingertips trace up Kurt’s arms, and then over his shoulders, finally making swirl patterns around the base of Kurt’s neck.

“I like.”

Kurt shivers.

“Good.”

"Mhm. Keep doing that."

“Kay...”

Kurt keeps his lips and fingers where they are, teasing Blaine.

"OhgodKurt..."

Blaine is on the verge of losing it- his towel. He reaches down to tuck the end back into place.

Kurt smirks.

“Everything okay, Blaine?”

Blaine's breathing is erratic. He pulls himself away from Kurt, hunger in his eyes.

"I wish to ravage you, straightaway."

Kurt raises an eyebrow at Blaine and grins smugly.

“I do not protest.”

Blaine's towel falls to the floor.


Comments

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I liked this chapter it was sweet. What is up with Rachel..it can't just be that she is upset with Brody cancelling last minute. I yet again need answers. Why do you keep doing this to me?? P.S. Is it wierd that I feel bad for Rachel when Blaine and Kurt are being so damn cute??? Is there something wrong with me????? I'm scared!!!

You will get answers, I promise :D And it's not weird! I feel bad for Rachel all the time xD

Thank you!