"Kurt!"

"Oh my god, Kurt!" there was a loud plunking noise.

Kurt opened his eyes wearily, taking in his surroundings. The room he was in had an eerie green glow about it. Light from the few florescent lights loomed over the furniture while it buzzed and flickered. The first thing he saw was Finn standing in the door frame with a look of shock on his face that was staring at Kurt. Next to him was carol with her hand over her heart, tears falling down her face. Only until after he took in their appearance did he notice someone holding his hand. He looked down to find his father looking as if he had suffered a hundred years of misery. Tear tracks stained his face, but he was not crying. He stared at Kurt with such love, and such misery it was quite literally scary for Kurt. His father was holding his hand firmly, and as Kurt looked down to the hand he was holding he noticed the immensely thick bandages that cover his left wrist and could feel the bandages on the other arm. Only then did Kurt remember why he was sitting an unfamiliar room, a hospital room.

A wave of despair flooded Kurt's lungs, pounding through his heart. It hadn't worked. He remembered well sitting in his room by the window, careful not to sit near anything that was stainable. His father didn't need to have to clean up stained cloths and furniture. Kurt remembered thinking about the bullies, about their hateful words. He thought about loneliness, about self hatred. He thought about how much he wanted to be just like everyone else. Kurt remembered putting the blade to his left wrist and feeling pain such he had never experienced. He remembered using the last bit of energy in him to do the same thing to his right arm, sinking into darkness before he even had time to drop the blade. And then he was gone, then he sunk into the blissful oblivion of snowy mist and whispering voices.

Carol gave a loud sniff and the florescent light above him gave a particularly obnoxious buzz and flicker which brought Kurt back to his senses. He looked at her, noticing Finn was still was staring at Kurt with his mouth open in what looked like a mixture of a silent scream and complete shock.

"It's ok Kurt, everything will be ok."

His father's voice washed over him. Those words triggered something inside of him, a feeling of deep loss, and of deep regret. His father's voice was what made Kurt burst into uncontrollable tears. Before he knew it he was curling in on himself, crying harder than he had ever cried in his life, hardly aware of carol and Finn. Kurt knew if he would have succeeded in killing himself it would have ruined his father, but Kurt just couldn't stand living in a world that told him he was a freak, a world that told him he was a pervert who lived a "chosen lifestyle." Kurt had tried his whole life to be himself because other than his father, Kurt himself was the only person he had. Kurt was tired. He was exhausted, and he just wanted it all to go away. He didn't believe in god, so when he put the blades to his wrists he didn't know where he would go, or even if he would just stop existing, but Kurt did not care. At that moment, in that instant, anywhere was better that his own mind that felt like padded walls that only drove him further into insanity. Anywhere was better than the world of ridicule and humiliation, a world where Kurt sat in bed every night desperately asking himself why he had to be this way, why he had to be gay.

Very slowly, Kurt's sobs died away, even more slowly did the tears cease to fall. Kurt lay in his hospital bed with an audience of loved ones, feeling weak and ill, cowardly and useless. Carol hand moved to stand above Burt who sat holding Kurt's hand firmly, fresh tears cascading down his pale cheeks. Fin remained in the doorway, facial expression identical to the one he had worn minutes ago, minutes that felt like hours to Kurt. For a handful of uncountable, long minutes, they all remained where they were, all sucked into the aura of sadness and pain.

Burt used his vacant hand to wipe hair off of his son's face, his precious boy looking like a Broken doll. "We are going to get through this kiddo, you hear me? And we will be alright, you will be okay, Kurt." Kurt didn't respond, but gave a weak sob and seemed to sink further down into the thin mattress.

Carol seemed to wake up out of a daydream at that moment and went down to kiss Burt's cheek and whisper softly into Burt's ear "well be outside." With that she walked towards the door. When she reached fin, he moved for the first time. He finally took his eyes off Kurt without changing his expression of shock and looked at his mother. "Come on." She whispered, and with one final look at Kurt, Finn left the room with stony legs, still with his face frozen in that same expression.

"Why Kurt? God, Kurt why?" Burt whimpered with a breaking voice.

Kurt didn't know what to say, but absentmindedly replied with the first thing he thought of.

"I was tired."

Burt stared at Kurt for a minute, trying to understand what had happened, what had Broken his boy, his son. "Were going to be okay, Kurt." Burt said, seeming to be reassuring himself just as much as Kurt. He squeezed Kurt's warm hand like a life line.

At that moment the door slammed open with startling momentum. Blaine stood in the door way looking like he had just run a thousand miles. His hair was on end, his cloths wrinkled and lopsided. Blaine looked out of breathe and sweaty. The greenish glow was flickering on him giving Blaine the frantic look of a mad man. At the site of Kurt alive and open-eyed, Blaine sunk to the floor, Kurt catching a glimpse of his face scrunching up in sobbing pain.

"God damn it, Kurt!" he yelled. Not loudly, but there was no doubt it was a yell.

Kurt's mouth fell open in shock, the gesture not reaching his eyes, while Burt seemed almost unperturbed by this loud interruption. Kurt had not thought of Blaine while he sat by the window of his bedroom, razor in hand. He had thought of his father, of his mother, of those monstrous bullies, but never did he think once of the boy who sat sobbing on his hospital room floor. Blaine, who helped him through unsuccessful self acceptance. Blaine, who taught him of courage, and of standing up for yourself. Blaine, who he would have never expected to be disturbed for more than a few seconds at the news of Kurt's suicide, or attempted suicide.

It was at that moment that Kurt realized what he had done. Though none of his pain had subsided, none of his troubles lessened, Kurt finally realized that his attempted suicide had sent those that he loved into disarray. Finn had looked like he had just witnessed a murder, while his father had cried the first publicly shed tear since the death of Kurt's mother. Carol had been weeping while the boy Kurt had felt he never had a chance with, the boy who had always seemed well kept and put together, lay still on the floor sobbing.

Kurt spent the next few hours under the greenish hue of the buzzing, flickering lights, wallowing in a dark pit of self hatred for what he had done, and even worse, for still wishing he had succeeded. He watched as Blaine gathered himself enough to get up and sit in a chair by Kurt's right side, staring at the wall opposite as if it was a disgusting thing Blaine had found on the sole of his shoe. Kurt wallowed still as carol came in looking exhausted and care-worn, straightening Kurt's sheets and wiping his forehead with a wet washcloth. He sat in self hatred as he watched Finn, who had obviously been crying, walk in looking remarkably similar to that time he lost "faith" in god, except this time there was much more misery and anger. After countless visits from nurses speaking words Kurt didn't listen to, After a million I love you's and I love you too's, even more everything will be ok's and well get through this's, carol and Finn left to go back to the home they, Burt and Kurt shared. Burt had refused point blank to leave his son alone in a hospital bed.

A few seconds after carol and Finn left, Burt looked up and Blaine who was still staring at the wall angrily.

"Don't you have to get home, kid?" Burt said, not impolitely, but there was no doubt Burt was implying something.

Blaine slowly looked at Burt, and then even more slowly seemed to return to the world outside his head. Kurt was looking at his father, still floating in an icy sea of despair, when Blaine spoke.

"Sir...sir I know- I know I have little right to ask this, bu- but would you mind if I spoke to Kurt alone? I will completely understand if you say no but I really want to talk to him."

Kurt had moved his cloudy gaze to Blaine when the boy had started talking, and by the time he had stopped Kurt's face was wide eyed with shock again. Why would Blaine want to talk to him alone? Only part of him was worrying, the rest of him still remained in his cloud of self hatred for still wanting to be dead, for wanting that even though he knew now the pain it caused.

Burt looked at Blaine with piercing eyes. He seemed to be reading the boy like an extremely fine-printed book. After a minute of intense glaring Burt looked at Kurt.

"Okay, but just a few minutes. I'm just going to go down to the cafeteria and force myself to eat something. Kurt, I love you kiddo, remember that." Burt squeezed Kurt's hand and looked at his son with such love and misery that Kurt fell even deeper into the darkness for putting that look in his father's eyes. Burt, incredibly reluctantly, removed his hand from Kurt's. He got up and walked to the door, giving Kurt one more protective look before leaving the room.

Almost immediately Blaine took Kurt's hand firmly in his. They sat in silence for a few seconds, looking at each other. Blaine's eyes fell to the bandages on the wrist of the hand he held, and his face became one of incredible pain. He looked up at Kurt with teary eyes looking a mixture of protectiveness, anger, and determination.

"Kurt, do you have any idea, any idea what it was like when I got a call from carol telling me you had tried to kill yourself. I thought you were dead! You would have been. Please Kurt, please tell me why you would do this. You are the most amazing person I have ever met, and even the concept of you thinking it would be a good idea to leave this world is completely and utterly incomprehensible to me!" Blaine's voice had gained volume as he went on and Kurt was completely taken aback by his words.

Kurt, unable to think due to the cloudy haze of despair, repeated the words he had muttered to his father.

"I was tired."

"Tired?" Blaine said looking at Kurt with his sad eyes and shaking his head. "I know Kurt; I know that feeling, believe me. But I was there for you Kurt, I still am! And your father loves you and I love you and carol loves you and Finn loves you, and hell! I've become so damn in love with you these past few months I'm almost going out of my head! I have made it my priority to make you happy, and then I get a call making me think for 2 fucking unbearable hours that you were dead! You, Kurt Hummel, the most fantastic person to walk this planet, dead. Please Kurt, life, Burt, I need you, we need you alive, you need you alive!"

It took Kurt a while to process these words. Kurt knew he had hurt Burt far more than he hurt Blaine, but Kurt still couldn't think how he could have sat with a blade to his wrist without thinking of Blaine. He remembered that not only a day ago Blaine's confession of love would have brought him deep happiness. At first Kurt didn't think the current pronouncement of love from Blaine had brought him any emotion at all, until he felt a strange coiling sensation in his stomach. It took Kurt good minute to realize it was happiness, and love. The fact that Kurt could still feel such things sent Kurt right over the edge, and he was crying just as hard as earlier, sobbing into his clammy hands and bandaged wrists.

As Blaine's arms surrounded him and as lips touched Kurt's pale cheek, Kurt seemed to lift out of his pit of darkness and despair. In that moment of sobbing and Blaine's loving arms, Kurt left his small bubble of self hatred, his eerie world of weeping and regret. For the first time in a long time, Kurt saw a small shimmering light of hope. It wasn't much, but it was everything to Kurt. Blaine kissed Kurt's cheek yet again and they lay together intertwined, Broken, but healing.