What about Kurt?

That’s what his mind latched onto when Mr. 21 asked him out.

Yeah, what about him?

Blaine’s lying on his couch with a bag of chips. It’s not the most nutritious meal, but he hasn’t gone grocery shopping and his mind is too preoccupied to do so. When Mr. 21 started talking, Blaine immediately thought about Kurt. When Mr. 21 asked him out, he felt like he needed to talk to Kurt about it first.

And not because he needs Kurt’s permission or anything, but what if Mr. 21 and Blaine go out on that date? That means he’ll have no chance with Kurt.

Holy shit.

Blaine’s eyes go wide and he thinks back to all the weird and uncomfortable feelings that arose when Kurt started talking about The Guy. Blaine’s lack of enthusiasm, Blaine’s disinterest, Blaine’s forced politeness… was all of that jealousy?

But I don’t even know him! Blaine thinks desperately, while he shoves another hand of chips in his mouth.

That’s the thing, though. Is that true? Blaine does know Kurt. Blaine probably knows Kurt like no other, and the same can be said for Kurt knowing Blaine. Their friendship is more solid than all of Blaine’s other friendships. Yes, if Blaine has to be honest, Kurt’s even a better friend than Wes.

He tells Kurt everything.

He trusts Kurt.

He talks to Kurt every day.

And sure, the same can be said about Wes, but Kurt always hears first. Blaine’s always itching to talk to Kurt. He never gets tired of him. Even now, he wants to reach for his phone to see if Kurt’s left messages or if he’s online. The only dislike that came with that was talking about The Guy, but if it’s jealousy, then that makes sense.

Fuck.

Now, Blaine needs to tell Kurt.

He doesn’t have to, but he wants to.

He likes Kurt. Blaine likes Kurt.

Blaine jumps off his couch. He practically runs towards his office. Sure, he can use a phone, but typing is still easier with an actual keyboard, so he turns on his computer and he impatiently waits for it to start.

He’s… well, he’s weirdly exhilarated. He’s ecstatic.

Blaine laughs to himself. It was so obvious. How did he not realise this before? How could he not see this? Now that he understands, he feels like the biggest idiot ever. He could’ve told Kurt earlier.

And then the pessimistic side of him adds: But who says he’ll like you back?

Blaine slumps in his seat. All the elated feelings disappear like snow in the sun.

That is of course a possibility. After all, Kurt is completely into The Guy. Not only that, but they still don’t know what they look like and Blaine’s been hesitant to ask for more, because Kurt seems to like this anonymity.

He opens Discord and he sees that he has some DMs from Kurt.

All the courage leaves Blaine’s body.

Should he tell Kurt? What if he ends up ruining it? But on the other hand, if Blaine doesn’t tell Kurt, then this jealousy will always hang over them and he’ll always wonder what could’ve happened. Blaine wants to laugh when he realises that the advice that he gave to Kurt also applies here.

He opens the DMs.

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
Okay, I’m in a train now so my messages might be abit wonky
but uhm like I said I asked The Guy out for a date

And here it is. Blaine can feel the jealousy. Kurt’s gotten under his skin, and now Blaine knows why. He lets out a sigh and he forces himself to read more.

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
But uhm he sort of rejected me?
Or not really
he said he needed time to think about it???
Like what does that even mean Blaine
Tbf I did ask him at a very unlucky moment
At least I did’t ask him at work because that would make things even more awkward
OH FUCK. WORK. WE WORK TOGETHER.
suppose I’m glad we don’t work in the same departments

Blaine reads it all. Kurt likes The Guy, and The Guy couldn’t give him a clear answer. What a bullshit. Can’t The Guy see what’s right in front of him?

If he were The Guy, he’d say yes in a heartbeat.

Because that’s the thing. Blaine really likes Kurt.

And he think he’s liked Kurt for a while now.

His hands hover over the keyboard. What will Blaine say? He can once again act as if nothing’s wrong and tell Kurt to try again, because hey, ‘needing time’ isn’t an outright no. He can encourage this. But he really doesn’t want to.

It’s weirdly funny, though. Mr. 21 asks Blaine out and Blaine gives the same answer as The Guy. Maybe Blaine can start there.

forabeatofadrum
Oh shit Kurt that sucks
Well if it makes you feel slightly better I also sort of rejected someone today

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
You did?

Crap. He didn’t expect Kurt to be online. His profile is set as offline, but that’s probably what it is: a setting. Well, it’s all or nothing now and all Blaine can do is hope it won’t ruin what they have. Because he has to tell Kurt.

forabeatofadrum
Yeah.
I told you I have this guy at my work, right? The ass who is no longer an ass.
Turns out he likes me and he asked me out
I came home and he happened to run into me and that’s when he asked me out on a date
Not the best timing, but alas

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
oh.

forabeatofadrum
And tbh I said yes, but then I said no

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
????

forabeatofadrum
I admit I wanted to say yes
tbh when he asked me out, it’s as if some things just fell into place
I’ve always thought he was attractive but now that he’s actually nice to me I started to realise that I quite like spending time with him
but a date is a next step, isn’t it???
Going from friendship to relationship isn’t a small thing

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
It isn’t

It isn’t. Kurt’s right there. Blaine types several things before backspacing again and again.

forabeatofadrum
Kurt, I then rejected him, and not because he isn’t cool or because I don’t know him well enough (I mean, people have apps and do blind dating these days), but because when he asked me out, I was thinking of you. In a weird way, he reminded me of you. And at that moment I realised I can’t go out with him, because if I do, then I will always wonder if the two of us could’ve been more than friends. I realised at that moment that I was jealous of you and The Guy, and that I had feelings for you. By going out with him, I’d be missing a possible chance with you, and I realised I can’t risk that. I don’t want to risk that, because I would pick you over him in a heartbeat. I really like you, Kurt.

There. It’s out there.

Blaine drags a hand over his face and he lets out a long sigh. He can of course delete the message, but since Kurt’s online, he knows that Kurt’s seen it. Blaine looks at the lower part of the screen. Kurt is typing. And then not. And then he’s typing again. Blaine watches the couple of dots move with a tense feeling. There’s no going back.

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
oh. Wow.
Blaine, wow.
I am a bit lost for words.

forabeatofadrum
I shouldn’t have dropped that on you
Sorry
Especially since you were talking about asking out this other person
And it’s FINE if you don’t feel the same, I just felt like I needed to tell you this because ever since I realised I like you, it’s something I cannot ignore and we’ve always been honest
Although I really, really, REALLY hope this hasn’t ruined our friendship
We don’t even know what the other looks lik and I know you like the anonymity and what not cause it makes the grief easier so I definitely do not want to jeopardise that in any way
I also just want to know if I should try and move on from you, maybe with this other guy, but if I’d always been wondering what could’ve happened between us, then that wouldn’t be fair to him
Sorry really for all of this

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
No no no don’t apologise
I think I need some time to process this
Because I now feel so fucking stupiud
As in, I had no idea what was right in front of me all this time

forabeatofadrum
What?

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
You said you didn’t realise your feelings until that other guy from your work asked you out, right?
I think I am going through a similar thing

forabeatofadrum
What????

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
When you just mentioned that someone asked you out, I got sad.
like really sad. And angry and annoyed.
healous.
I hot jealous
AH FUCKING TYPOS NOT NOW THIS IS IMPORTANT
JEALOUS I GOT JEALOUS.
I got jealous, Blaine

Blaine lets out an actual gasp. Is Kurt saying what he thinks he’s saying. He asks just to be sure.

forabeatofadrum
Kurt, does that mean what I think it means? You have feelings for me too?
Or am I finally losing it???

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
You’re not losing it

forabeatofadrum
holy shit

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
I think I just realised I like you too
As in more than friends
Blaine, I like you a lot

Blaine might have to jump around his room. He gets out of his chair and he feels like a hormonal teenager, but who cares? He dances for a little while, but then he composes himself and he rushes back to the keyboard.

forabeatofadrum
So… what now?
Because holy shit Kurt
I want to give this a shot, but how

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
We could… meet?

Blaine’s positive that he’s dreaming. All of this is happening so fast, but he isn’t mad about it. He was so afraid he’d ruin a friendship, but apparently Kurt realises the feelings are mutual, and now he wants to meet? Blaine was so certain that Kurt wouldn’t want to breach the anonymity.

forabeatofadrum
Really??

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
Yes. If yo u want to.
I don’t want to rush you or anything
into anything
I just want to get to know you better
If you want that too
So would you consider going o na date with me?

forabeatofadrum
Yes
YES
I DON’T EVEN NEED TO CONSIDER I KNOW MY ANSWER
I want that too!!

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
oh my god this is happening
OKAY

forabeatofadrum
OKAY

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
I know we’re in the same time zone.
New York is the biggest city I can get to
Since, uh… I live there.

forabeatofadrum
SHUT THE FUCK UP ME TOO

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
Wait holy FUCK. You’re telling me we’ve been in the same city all this time???
okay as you know I work most evenings, but so do you.
I can do Friday the 15^th at noon

forabeatofadrum
Yes that works for me
Wait, Kurt… do we exchange photos??
Cause yeah I have no clue what you look like

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
Uh.
UHHH
I hope you don’t mind me saying this, but can’t we see each other for the first time then?
Idk im… a bit nervous about what you’ll see

forabeatofadrum
Kurt, I realised I’ve had feeling for you based on your personality for weeks
months even, maybe
I don’t think your looks are going to change how I feel
But its fine. I’ve waited weeks to see you, I can wait two more days

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
thanks for saying that.
I appreciate it.
Im slowly getting back my confidence after walking around in sweatpants for too long, but sometimes it just comes back
my job in fashion definitely got me motivated again

forabeatofadrum
No rush!!
I can’t wait to see you, no matter what you look like

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
😊
Where will we meet?

forabeatofadrum
Uhh there’s this coffee shop called Think Coffee
otherwise my friend’s aunt has a Chinese restaurant, but it uses too much garlic in my opinion

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
Blaine, there’s no such thing as too much garlic

forabeatofadrum
God you sound like Wes
my friend

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
But yeah, maybe a garlic-y place isn’t the ideal spot for a first date
Think Coffee sounds fine. Does 1pm work???

forabeatofadrum
Yes, it does.

someonetocrowdyouwithlove
See you soon then
In person

forabeatofadrum
See you soon!!
❤❤❤