Blaine thought for a moment, considering each before answering with confidence.  “Just let me talk.  I think I need to work this out in my head.”

“Okay.”  Scott’s voice was even and unimposing, his expression when Blaine looked up kind and inviting.  

He could do this.

And he did.

Blaine talked and talked and talked, until their hour had come and gone but Scott took his lunch break after Blaine, so Blaine just kept talking, until the rush of words slowed to a trickle before finally stopping.  Scott passed him a water bottle, giving Blaine time to take a few small sips, the water cooling his heated face.  “How do you feel now?”

“Um. Lighter. Better.  I am still not... But I feel better that at least I am not being... smothered anymore.”

“That’s really good.  Do you want to return to anything in specific?  Or a few other questions?  We have time for one or two more before my next appointment.”

Blaine refused to let himself feel bad for taking up Scott’s lunch hour.  Except that he did.  “Maybe a few different questions?  I don’t think we will make any more progress on...that front today.”

“How do you like Boston?”

“I...really like it.  I like that it is quieter than New York.  It still has a good music scene and things to keep me busy all the time.  I miss New York a lot.  But I feel like I could grow to love it here.”

“How did the music auditions pan out?  You had mentioned going to a few auditions last time.”

“I was hired for two nights a week at one place, the other did not choose to pick up my contract.”  The bitterness bled into his voice, but that was okay here, he was finally realizing.

“Do you have any plans for filling the rest of your time?”

“I was thinking about checking out a gym, see what classes they have.  I used to box, and I may pick it up again.  I was also thinking about maybe going back to school for my music education degree.  I don’t know who would hire me with my background, but I like kids and I like music.”

“Maybe you could check out one of the local music stores to see if they need a piano teacher?”

“I..” That was a good idea.  That sounded really good, actually.  “I may do that.”

“It is worth a shot, anyway.”

“I was also thinking about maybe getting a dog. I have to check with my landlord of course. But I think we are allowed to have pets.”  Blaine had always wanted a dog, but he had never been allowed one.

“A dog would be very good for you.  I own two myself and there is nothing quite so calming as petting a dog.  And the exercise they need will get you up and out.  I know you run, but you can go socialize at a dog park.”

Blaine nodded.  A dog sounded even better than teaching music.  They loved you unconditionally, right?  And unconditional love would be good...

“Blaine?  Care to share your thoughts?”

“I...think a dog is a really good idea.  Aren’t they supposed to love you unconditionally?  I think I could really use that right now.”

“Is this about Kurt or your brother?”

Because he could, because he felt safe doing so here, Blaine answered after a deep breath.  “Both, I think.  I am pretty sure they loved me in their own ways.  But...I don’t want to be second to anyone for a while, and their loyalties lay elsewhere.”

“Would you be open to talking to them again?  On a more frequent basis, that is.  You mentioned emailing occasionally to give them updates, but have you thought about reopening those lines of communication?”

“I don’t know that I am ready to trust them again.”

“I am not suggesting you trust them if you do not feel safe doing so.  But even if it is a means of closure, take this week to think about it.”

“I can do that much.”

“Good.  So same time next week?”

“Yeah.  Sorry for taking so much of your time today.”

“It is no trouble.  My best days are ones like these.”

“Have a good week, Scott.”

Blaine was calling his landlord before he left the building Scott’s office was in and then googling to find the nearest pet shelter.

There was a no-kill shelter no very far from Scott’s office, so Blaine went straight there.  He was met at the door by a college-age girl with a nametag that proudly proclaimed “Laura: Volunteer” on it.

“Hello, sir.  How can I help you today?”

“Blaine, please.  I need a running buddy who doesn’t mind a small family.”

Laura smiled and led him to sign in and then through the door labeled ‘Dogs.’  “I think I can help you, Blaine.  Do you want to just walk through, or do you have a particular dog in mind?”

“I was hoping it would be love at first sight, so I guess just walking through?”

“Would you like company? I know all of the dogs here and I can help you find the one that you will fit with best.”

“That sounds good.”

“Have you been here before and has someone explained the process to you?”  They had paused just inside the entrance to the hall, which smelled of dog and was lined with decently spacious kennels.

“No...”

“Don’t worry.  We just want the best for our dogs.  So if you have another animal we would like to supervise a visit.  We also will need to come and do a quick home visit, which can be as early as later today or tomorrow to ensure that your new friend will be going to a safe home.”

Those all sounded reasonable, so Blaine nodded.  “Seems fair.”

“Good. So, do you have a size preference in mind?”

“Nothing too big, since I’m not a big guy, but nothing very small.”

“And a good running partner, you said?”

“That would be ideal.”

“If you would follow me, I have a few that may work for you.”

And she did.  There were five dogs, all mixes of some sort that he could see himself very happy with.  At the end of the hall, near where he was hand-sanitizing his hands, a labrador caught his eye.  “Doug” the name tag on his kennel read, had come from a home that didn’t love him enough.  He was seven years old, loved playing fetch and running around, didn’t like loud noises or men.

But there was something about that dog.  

“Doug is a sweetheart, but he doesn’t do well with men.  Maybe...?

“No.  Please.  I know he may not like me, and that’s fine. But I’d like to try.”

Laura nodded and Blaine stepped forward, doing all the things he had been told to do, eyes on Doug’s feet, predictable movements, and hand held out to the bars of the kennel.  Cautiously, with Laura encouraging him with soft cooing sounds, Doug moved forward and sniffed Blaine’s hand thoroughly.  Blaine sighed with relief, smiling widely when Doug’s tail wagged and he gave Blaine’s hand a small lick.  “Good boy, good Doug.” Blaine repeated it over and over as he slowly crouched down. Doug backed away a bit, but came back when Blaine changed nothing else.

Blaine was able to scratch Doug’s chin and he wanted to cry with relief.  He had never been so happy for a dog to accept him.

“Would you like to meet him in the yard?”  Laura laughed when she saw his smile.  “I’ll take that as a yes.  I’ll paige someone to bring him out as we walk there, sound good?”

“Yes.  That sounds wonderful.”

The five minutes it took for all four of them, Blaine, Laura, Doug, and Doug’s new handler, to get into the yard were far longer than they should have been.

Eventually, though, Blaine was given a few treats for his pockets, a ball to throw, and Doug was off his leash.  It took Doug another few minutes for him to approach Blaine, obviously searching for the food, which Blaine gave him a piece of.

After the treat, Doug stayed by Blaine, eying the ball.  

“Want me to throw this, Doug?”  He picked the ball up and Doug’s tail wagged, faster and faster, more alert and concentrating on the ball as Blaine moved it.  Blaine threw it and Doug ran, racing after it, catching it on the second bounce and bringing it back, tail up and wagging proudly.  He started walking towards Laura, but she shook her head and he headed to Blaine again, dropping the ball at Blaine’s feet, obviously waiting for Blaine to throw it.

“Okay, okay.  I’ll throw it again.”  He did, and Doug brought it back straight to him that time.

It repeated several more times, until Doug wanted a break, drinking from the water bowl before flopping onto the ground at Blaine’s feet, belly up.  “Demanding a belly rub?  I thought only cats demanded things.”  Doug wiggled on the ground and Blaine bent over and scratched him, kneeling when it began to strain.

“It seems I was wrong.  He doesn’t generally like men.  Just you.”  Laura had moved next to him, kneeling and petting Doug too.

“I live alone and will be living alone for the near future, so we can work on socializing slowly.  Isn’t that right, boy?”

“Am I right in thinking you want to adopt him?”

“Yes.  Please.”

“Let’s put his leash back on and we’ll take care of paperwork and schedule the visit, although I can’t imagine there being a problem.  You don’t have a meth lab, do you?”

“I do not.  I live in a decent neighborhood.  Quiet and perfect.”

“It sounds wonderful for Doug.  If you two would follow me?”  She handed Blaine Doug’s leash and held the gate to the yard open for them.

Twenty minutes later, registration papers in hand, Blaine was shown where the little pet store was so he could get the basics.  Laura had offered to take him and Doug in her car and she would do the home visit then, since it was such a slow day.  “Of course, everyone will come in right after I leave.  That’s how it always works.”

Blaine nodded and paid for the dog bed, kennel, food, and pack of tennis balls.  Her car was small, and they packed themselves in carefully, Doug quite content to look out the window at everyone they passed.  The drive didn’t take long and parking was not as terrible as it could have been.  It was only the matter of getting everything up the narrow flight of stairs (which Doug seemed distrustful of) and into Blaine’s apartment.  He was thankful that he was generally a neat person, so there was only a mug out on the counter, sheet music scattered around, and clothes thrown haphazardly on his bed.

“I will just need a quick look around, and then he is all yours.”  Laura looked at Blaine and he gestured for her to start.  

A few quick questions and the very short grand tour later, Laura was handing Doug’s leash over the Blaine and wishing them a good day, the door shutting quietly behind her.

“I guess it’s just you and me, Doug.  I’m going to set everything up while you explore, okay?”  Doug huffed at him, wandered around sniffing, ignoring Blaine as he struggled with putting the kennel together.  This was supposed to be easy to assemble.  The box even said so.  They must have meant easy for a small army.  Or an octopus.  

Thirty minutes and a lot of swearing later, the kennel had been conquered just in time for Doug to scratch at the door.  “Bathroom break?”  Blaine thought he could hear his knees creak as he stood up and gathered the leash.  Doug danced around Blaine, settling only long enough for Blaine to hook the leash to his collar before starting again.  “Am I taking too long?”  

Doug stared and Blaine before scratching at the door again.  “Okay.  Okay.  Let me grab my keys...and we’re off.”

The next two days were easier than Blaine could have hoped for.  Doug was easy going and they figured out their routine without much problem.  After the first night (with Doug miserable in the kennel), it sat forsaken in the corner.  Blaine figured that it could be useful at some point, so he didn’t disassemble it (and he didn’t want to have to deal with that).  By the second day, Blaine had learned that a scratch at the door was his first warning and that Doug’s huffed breath and soft whine at him was his second.  Thankfully, Blaine had forced himself off his piano bench to take Doug out after the second warning.

Doug made for the perfect running partner.  They went early to avoid the growing heat and other dogs, since Blaine was not yet quite awake enough to deal with socializing with anyone when they were running.  

The third day their run was slightly shorter, so Blaine wouldn’t tire himself out too much.  

As a means of keeping himself entertained and not holed up in his apartment (which was lovely but he was going stir crazy), Blaine had decided to try a yoga class.  The gym had gotten good reviews online and wasn’t too far away, and they had had a spot open in their beginning class.  Before...everything he had fit in an intermediate class, but he was still feeling his injuries, so the beginning class would be better.

After their run, Doug curled up on his bed in the corner as Blaine rinsed off in the shower and dressed in yoga-appropriate attire.  A glance at the clock told him he had an hour to kill before he had to leave, so he settled on the couch with a peanut butter and banana sandwich and flipped channels, leaving it on some home shopping network and grabbing a book when the special on floral-patterned skirts was the most interesting thing on.

All gyms, Blaine thought, smelled the same.  Something that was related to popcorn...but not nearly so clean.  And more feet.  This one had that same smell, but to a lesser extent.  It was bright and clean, the entry room opening up into a larger space with doors leading off to the locker rooms on the side, a wall of mirrors reflecting Blaine back at him.  

“Um.  Hi.  I signed up for the beginning yoga class?”  

The young guy sitting at the desk glanced up, still typing.  “Name?”

“Blaine Anderson.”

The guy popped his gum twice as he looked.  “We offer one trial class for free.  After that you pay by the month.  Would you like to use that trial class now?”

“Yes, please.”

Another pop of the gum and a few clicks of a keyboard.  “You’re all set.  If you need a locker, they are through those,” he nodded to the side, “doors.  Your class will be starting in ten minutes in Room 2.”

“Thank you.”  Blaine got the pop of gum in response and went to the locker room, eyes wandering as he went.  It seemed...friendly, except for the gum-popping guy at the front desk..  There was a top-40 station playing in the background of the main gym, which had a good array of equipment, about half of which was in use.  Figuring out how to work the locker was not difficult, and soon his wallet and keys were stowed, his water bottle and towel in his hand as he made his way to Room 2.

Most of the mats were already claimed by water bottles, and Blaine took one in the back corner (mostly because it was a really pretty blue).  A tall, blond man was circulating the room, chatting with different groups of people for a few moments before moving on.  Blaine watched his progression as he stretched a bit, his back cracking satisfactorily as he twisted.

“Make sure you don’t over-stretch cold muscles.  That would be painful.”  Blaine jumped slightly, the voice startling him out of his momentary distraction.  

“Oh.  I’ve already gone for a run.  All limbered up.”  He was taller than Blaine, blond hair a bit on the floppy side, with bright blue eyes and a wide, easy smile.

“That’s good to hear.  Too many people stretch too much and end up causing more harm than good.  I’m Sam, by the way.”  He held out his hand and Blaine grasped it, returning the firm handshake.  

“Blaine.”

“Awesome, our new student.  Have you done yoga before?”

“A bit, but I had to stop for a while, so I am trying to ease myself back into it.”  Blaine tried to keep the grimace off of his face.  Something must have shown, because Sam’s brow creased before it smoothed back over.  “I should start class, I suppose.  I hope you enjoy it.”

They exchanged smiles and Sam wove his way through the mats, calling to the people he had missed greeting.  He closed the door to the main studio, clicked on the sound system, greeted everyone, and started into his routine.

The class was refreshing.  Part of Blaine was annoyed that he was struggling with things that he knew how to do but was no longer able to.  But it felt good to stretch out until it was just shy of pain and he felt loose and happy.  It wasn’t the same as a runner’s high, but he felt relaxed.  

Sam came over and gave him a high-five as everyone was packing up.  “Great job, man.  Your form is awesome.”

“Thanks.  I’m not as good as I used to be, but I’m getting there.”

“You just decide to take a break?”

“Um.  I got...hurt and was in the hospital for a bit.  Now I’m just trying to get back to where I was.”

“I’m sure you’ll get there in no time.”  Sam’s smile was contagious and Blaine had to duck his head to hide his own.  Sam pushed at his shoulder and Blaine started.  “Whoah.  Sorry, dude.”

“No.  You’re fine.  I just am easily startled.”

“Sorry for startling you.”  He smiled again before moving away, spraying the mats down with a spray bottle and wiping them off, working around Blaine as he gathered himself.  “You’re welcome to stick around for a bit.  I have to put all this stuff away, but I can talk at the same time.”

“I, should, uh...I should go home.  I just got a dog and he probably would like to go out.”  

“Cool. Dogs awesome.  What breed?”

“Yellow lab.”

“I love labs.  Boxers are my favorite though.  All that energy?  Trying to keep them calm keeps me running all the time.”

After a slightly awkward pause, Blaine cleared his throat.  “Uh, you lead an awesome class.”

“Thanks!  Am I gonna see you next week?”

“I think so, yeah.”

“Awesome.  Have a good week, Blaine.”

“You too, Sam.”

Riding on the high of talking to someone who was neither one of his neighbors nor his therapist, Blaine took Doug out and then sat down in front of his computer.  He made a list of all of the music stores and schools that might need a piano teacher.  One in particular looked promising--they had a “we are looking for assistance in the shop, please call for information” banner on their website.   Blaine picked up the phone and an appointment was set for the next day for him to come in.  

List finished, Blaine called each one, making one other appointment to come in and have an interview for the beginning of the following week.  

Satisfied with his day, Blaine put on his dancing playlist, made dinner, and finished his book as he ate.

And if he invited Doug onto the sofa with him after the kitchen was clean, well, it was his apartment and he could do what he wanted.