“What does this note mean Blaine?” Jane asked her son as she paced the length of the living room. Looking down at her fifteen year old with a new born baby in his arms, she couldn’t fathom the situation before her.
“It means what it says, Claire is my daughter” he shrugged softly trying not to wake the baby. He too was trying to wrap his head around the fact that he, Blaine Anderson, 15 years old, was now a father. Screaming on the inside, he was strangely calm on the outside.
“All it says is ‘She’s yours, please look after her’. How do we know this baby really is yours?”
“Her name is Claire and look at her, Mom. She has my eyes and I had slept with her mother. There’s no doubt she’s my daughter” Blaine sighed and looked up from the beautiful little girl in his arms to his father who had been quiet all night. The usually talkative man hadn’t said a word since he opened the front door to find a baby’s bassinet on their porch. “Please say something Dad”
“You know this girl you...slept with?” Michael asked softly
“I’ve known Annabelle since grade school. Her parents used to own the tire shop on Rose Street”
“And you know that she only slept with you in the time frame this baby was conceived?”
“Claire” Blaine insisted with a heavy sigh. Neither of his parents wanted to really acknowledge the baby by name because they had no intention of getting attached. “I don’t know if she was or not but I do know that she wasn’t even the type to sleep with me at that party. We were drunk and we made a mistake, one neither of us would have repeated soon after that night”
“I’m going to over look the fact that you were drinking at fifteen years old” Michael growled “But you cannot take responsibility for this child when you don’t even know if she’s biologically yours”
“She’s mine Dad. You just have to look at her, but clearly you’re just too scared to because you’ll see that she looks just like me”
“Blaine do you remember the conversation you had with your father and I about a year ago?” Jane asked softly as she sat down beside her son, resting her hand on his shoulder.
“I came out to you both, I remember” Blaine nodded remembering the night she was talking about. Always knowing that he was somehow different, Blaine discovered himself and his sexuality when he was more attracted to the new guy in class rather than his gorgeous cheerleader sister. He’d never really found girls appealing like he should have as a teenage boy and it was then that he came out to his parents. They needed to know this about their son and Blaine hoped and prayed for their acceptance. Jane and Michael understood and accepted their son for who he was but they were still coming to terms with it. It was an issue that would take some getting used to.
“Was that whole conversation pointless Blaine? Are you not gay anymore?”
“Trust me when I tell you, I’m still gay” Blaine sighed and stood up still trying not to wake up the snoozing baby in his arms. “I’ve always been gay and I will always be gay so you’re gonna have accept that sooner or later”
“Gay men don’t father children” Michael snapped and felt his wife tense up. The one thing that Jane had never been able to come to terms with when Blaine came out to them was the fact that she’d never get grandchildren. Of course he could adopt later in life but she had to accept that she’d never have a biological grandchild.
“Gay men can do whatever they like but that night I was drunk. All I remember of that night was beer pong, spin the bottle and waking up naked next to Annabelle knowing exactly what we’d done” the teenager snapped loudly unfortunately waking up Claire. The week old baby started crying softly until it grew to an ear piercing wail. Rocking her in his arms gently, Blaine dug through the diaper bag that had been left on their porch beside Claire and pulled out a pacifier. He hoped it would calm her as he held the pacifier to her lips until she took it. Letting out a sigh of relief, he was grateful that she wasn’t crying over anything else.
“With all this aside, why was the baby left on our doorstep? Where is Annabelle?” Michael sighed as he let out a deep breath. This was all so much to take in and they hadn’t even thought of the mother.
“I don’t know but her Dad’s shop is boarded up and there’s a For Sale sign up on their lawn”
“They skipped town...”
“I don’t know” Blaine sighed and continued to rock Claire gently in his arms. Looking down at the beautiful little girl, he couldn’t understand why anyone would give her up but Annabelle must have had a reason “I don’t know where they went or why but Annabelle must have had a reason for leaving Claire here before going wherever she’s gone”
“If she didn’t want the baby then why did she go through with the pregnancy?” his father asked like Blaine had all the answers. He didn’t have any answers and the screaming in his mind was getting much louder.
“I don’t know Dad but I do know that I have to grow up right now. I’m fifteen and I’m going to raise a child by myself. Do you know how terrified I am right now?” he gasped on the verge of tears. Unable to react too much without jostling Claire, the teenager just wanted to scream right there and then.
“You could put her up for adoption...” Jane whispered fearing her son’s reaction.
“That is not an option”
“Blaine...”
“I’m going to go upstairs and put Claire to bed in her bassinet because I don’t have a crib for her yet. I’m then going to watch her all night because I’m too scared to sleep. The last experience I had with a newborn baby was when Andrew was born and he’s 12”
“Blaine...” Jane sighed softly
“Goodnight” he nodded and picked up Claire’s diaper bag. “And if you hear her crying through the night I’m sorry and I will take care of it because I know exactly what I’m doing”
Blaine turned on his heel and ascended the stairs u to his bedroom setting the diaper bag down by his bed. Gently laying Claire down on his pillow, Blaine quickly set up the bassinet and set his daughter into it. It’d have to work until he could find a crib and everything else he needed to look after this little girl.
The fifteen year old sat cross legged on his bed and just watched the sleeping baby. He clenched his hands together pulling at the skin til it was red and sore. Blaine was scared. He was absolutely terrified that he was going to completely screw up this innocent little girl. He was fifteen, what the hell did he know about raising a child? He was still a child himself.
A soft knock at his door brought Blaine out of the black hole of fear he was sinking into. Looking up, he saw his older sister Emily standing at his door with a book in her hand.
“She’s cute” she smiled “She looks like you did when you were born”
“How do you know what I looked like when I was born? You were only 4” Blaine chuckled
“That chubby little face was a bit a hard to forget”
“I’m making the worst mistake of my life aren’t I Em?”
“Maybe” she chuckled and came to sit on his bed. She pulled the blanket up over Claire gently and kissed her forehead softly. “I think it’s noble that you’re doing this but you’re only 15 Blaine. You’re still a baby yourself”
“She’s mine Emily. I can’t just give her up, Claire doesn’t deserve to be dumped by both parents” Blaine sighed softly “I’m petrified...”
“I’m not surprised little bro” she laughed until her brother’s harsh glare silenced that laugh “I will help you do whatever you need to raise this little girl, I promise” Emily smiled “I love you Blaine and I’m going to love and spoil Claire rotten. I know how scared you are which is why I brought this home for you”
Emily handed Blaine the book before setting her hands in her lap. Turning it over he saw that it was ‘Parenting For Dummies’ the perfect book for his situation. Laughing softly he pulled his sister into a tight hug. He couldn’t be any more thankful for this book, it would become his lifeline.
“Andrew texted me as soon as Dad found the baby and I was at the Mall with Casey and I thought this would be the best ‘Congratulations on being a new Dad’ gift”
“Thankyou Emily, really”
“Anytime little bro and like I said, I will help you out when you need me. Andrew will too”
“Thanks, I know I’m going to need all the help I can get... I’ve never looked after a baby before”
”Well get ready then” Emily chuckled “By the time Claire wakes up for a feed you may have learnt how to feed her”
Blaine simply nodded nervously
“You can do this”
“Can I?”
“Well I guess you’ll just have to give it a try. You might surprise yourself”