Sept. 10, 2013, 4:46 p.m.
Gimme Shelter: Chapter 7
E - Words: 7,148 - Last Updated: Sep 10, 2013 Story: Complete - Chapters: 22/22 - Created: Aug 29, 2013 - Updated: Apr 13, 2022 153 0 0 0 0
Blaine sat strumming his guitar, watching Kurt as he stretched and stapled their painting onto wooden frames. Kurt had cut the canvas into three large sections; each featuring a clear figure. A constant stream of talk flowed between the two as they worked; the atmosphere was happy and carefree. The loft was hot, the summer heat fully filling the space leading both shirtless and glistening with sweat. Blaine loved that they could just be like this, half dressed and sweating, but fully comfortable with themselves and each other. Kurt added the last staple to the final frame before propping it up beside the others. Blaine could resist temptation no longer; he laid his guitar aside and approached his boyfriend. He loved the feel of their skin sliding together and he snaked his arms around Kurt and let his chest brush his back.
"They are beautiful," he mumbled nipping a kiss to Kurt's neck causing him to moan with half a laugh.
"They are inspiring you I see," Kurt teased; turning around in Blaine's hold to better kiss him.
Blaine ran his hands up his muscled back before sliding them down to grip Kurt's waist. "You inspire me," he said against Kurt's lips causing both of them to giggle at the cheesiness of it. Blaine was just latching his lips back on Kurt's long slender neck when the sound of tires crunching on the gravel outside drifted up to them. Kurt pushed lightly on Blaine's chest with an exasperated sigh. Blaine groaned at the loss.
"That's probably Puck, we should at least greet him." Kurt told him, still not completely extracting himself from Blaine's grip.
Blaine shook his head, not wanting to see anyone else, not even Puck. "He knows his way around, I'm sure he will be fine."
"No Blaine, you know as well as I do that if we don't go out there, he will just come in here no matter what we are doing." Kurt told him finally moving out of Blaine's arms.
They joked with each other, laughing at the reaction Puck would likely have if he caught them in the act as they made their way down the ladder and to the barn door. Kurt was laughing a full and bright sound at the image of Puck cheering them like at a football game as he opened the door. Blaine was too busy trying to grab Kurt's waist as he yelled, "touchdown" to notice Kurt freeze and his laughter abruptly end. It wasn't until after he grabbed him, with no response that he looked up and noticed Puck was not their visitor.
In the driveway, a blue station wagon sat as an older woman extracted herself from behind the wheel. She was short and chubby with her hair perfectly styled in a flip. Her blue dress was worn but pressed to look neat. Her face was kind but worry-lines on her forehead that could not be ignored. Her eyes were locked on Kurt clearly taking in his appearance. "Kurt" she whispered the sound almost lost on the wind.
Blaine quickly released Kurt's waist and took in the ridged line of his back. "Carole?" Kurt questioned taking one tentative step forward. "How? What are you doing here?"
She worried with her black purse clutched in her hands. "I didn't know what to do... you said that if I needed to get a hold of you, I could write Quinn here, but it seemed so important so I... I didn't know what else to do..."
Blaine stood in the doorway as he watched Kurt slowly approach the woman. "What are you talking about?" Kurt asked.
"This came for you," she said taking a crisp white envelope from her purse. "I didn't know what to do; I thought it might be important."
She held the envelope out to Kurt who took it with shaking fingers. His eyes had barely flitted to the writing on the front before he was shoving it back into her surprised hands. "Take it back, if anyone asks you don't know where I am and you haven't seen me." Kurt choked out as he backed away from her.
"Kurt, this is the government you can't just ignore it, you don't even know what it says. Maybe they reconsidered." She said still holding the letter out to him pleadingly.
"Changed their minds?" Kurt almost yelled. "This is the draft board Carole, I doubt it says, 'alright we believe you now, you don't want to be a murderer so go enjoy your life.' It doesn't work that way. We both know what that is; it is my death sentence. I can't do it Carole! So you have to tell anyone who comes and asked that you don't know where I am."
Tears were pooling in the woman's eyes now. "I can't lie Kurt."
"Carole, if they find me it's either the army or prison, neither of which I think I can survive. Please if you love me, just say I ran off after graduation and you don't know where I am. I won't be here, so it won't be a lie." Kurt begged the woman.
Tears now fell down her face, "Kurt please, I can't lose you again not with Finn..."
Kurt closed the distance again taking her hands in his. "What about Finn?" he asked quickly.
"He got his papers, he leaves for Vietnam in two weeks," she whispers as if speaking softly would make it less real.
"I'm sorry Carole, I really am, but that," he said nodding to the envelope still clutched in one of her hands, "will not help. All it will do is put me there right along with him. At least he can fight back."
She nodded almost numbly as if the movement held little meaning before looking directly into Kurt's eyes. "You're right, of course your right. I'm sorry; I shouldn't have come. I won't say anything just...please don't disappear again, I can't lose you both, I can't worry about both of you all the time. It was okay when he was stationed in Virginia, but... I just can't Kurt."
"I'll write, but you can't come here again Carole. I won't be here." Kurt told her firmly.
She hugged him tightly; Blaine wanted to be there, wanted to be the one holding Kurt. He knew that his calm resolve had to be mostly a show; knew it was affecting him more than he was letting on. Plus, talk of Kurt not being here at the farm sent panic through his mind. He needed to talk to Kurt but felt cemented to the doorway of the barn, not able to move closer to comfort either of them. He missed the mumbled words that passed between the two before Carole slid back into the car. They both stood frozen as she finally drove away. Not until the dust was finally settling for her departure, did Kurt turn around tears now trickling down his cheeks.
"Blaine?" He whined a pleading look in his eyes. Blaine quickly unstuck himself and rushed to Kurt capturing him in his arms. They stood in the driveway, Kurt crying onto Blaine's bare shoulder, trembling, and clutching at his back as if he wanted to climb into him and hide. Blaine for his part gripped him so tightly his muscles ached with it, mumbling nonsense into his hair as he swayed them gently from side to side. He noticed the curtain in the window part for a moment before fluttering back into place. Blaine half-expected Quinn to come out and check on her clearly distraught friend, but she never emerged from the house.
An hour must have passed before Kurt's grip lessened and he began to push away from Blaine's body. "I just... I can't, you know I can't," he mumbled his bloodshot eyes finally meeting Blaine's.
"I know, but let's go inside to your room and we can talk about what you want to do." Blaine said, smoothing his hands down Kurt's back. With a nod, they made their way into the house and up to Kurt room, without meeting Quinn on the way. Once safely closed in Kurt's room and sitting together Indian style on his bed facing each other, Blaine asked the question he was dreading, "So... what are you going to do?"
Kurt played with his fingers speaking to them rather than Blaine, "I don't know, I don't think I can stay here, I don't think it is safe."
"Who was that woman?" Blaine said instead of what he really wanted to know, now afraid of what Kurt may say. He knew that he could not avoid the topic forever, knew he couldn't avoid it for long, but he couldn't bring himself to focus on it again... not yet.
"That was Carole Hudson; I think I told you about her... she was dad's girlfriend before... I stayed with her and her son Finn." Kurt said, still not meeting Blaine's eyes. He gave a deep sigh before lifting his head. "I have to leave Blaine and I don't know when or if it will ever be safe to come back. Anywhere I go... it won't be like this, no place else is truly safe for us. You know hippies may talk a lot about peace and love, but that still doesn't mean they are all okay with us, with what we have. I could find a commune or go to Canada, but I don't think we will find the kind of freedom we have here."
To Blaine this was starting to sound like a goodbye and he just couldn't have that, he couldn't let Kurt go, not like this. "We will find a way; we will find someplace where we can be ourselves. Let's just stop and think for a minute."
Kurt looked at Blaine with large sad eyes, "I don't know. I don't want to have to leave you, but I can't fathom a place where it will be like this, not in Ohio. You have school in the fall... you can just go following me across the country or out of it, no matter what I want."
Blaine could feel his heart breaking and couldn't stop the tears from welling in his eyes. "Do you... do you not want me to come with you?" he asked, his voice breaking.
"No honey, no it's not that. I can't let them ruin your life too, not like this. I want you to be safe and without your student exemption that won't happen." Kurt told him grabbing his hands in a fierce squeeze.
"I don't have to get a student exemption, they don't want me anyway. I can tell them I'm gay and..."
Kurt cut him off before he could finish. "No! Don't you understand, once people find out you can't take it back! Please promise me that you won't tell the draft board. It was a last resort for me and they didn't even believe me. Employers want to see your draft card, they will find out and you will never be hired. I wish it wasn't this way but it is, people find out you are gay and you are an instant pariah."
"I don't care about that Kurt!" Blaine yelled cutting him off. "I don't care if the entire world hates me, not anymore. But not everyone is like that, I would rather a few people like the real me than to live a lie. I would rather be with you, happy, than have to say goodbye to you."
Kurt looked at him at him despair emanating from his eyes. "I just, I don't want you to end up hating me for taking you away from everything you have ever loved or worked for. I couldn't stand that."
"I could never hate you Kurt," Blaine told him, hoping to convey all his feelings with that simple phrase. Now was not the time for expressions of love, it would seem desperate and not heartfelt.
"Let's just think about what we are going to do and worry about me later."
"I could ask Puck if he knows any places that will be safe to hide." Kurt said.
Blaine shook his head, "We don't know when he will be back. Shouldn't we leave sooner rather than later?"
"I can't leave Quinn here alone." Kurt looked at him as if he had lost his mind.
"Why not? Surely she can take care of herself." Blaine said incredulously.
Kurt shook his head this time, "It's not her that I am worried about, it's the farm. Yes, technically, she owns it, but this is my home, those are my animals, I can't just leave them untended. Do you know the pain the cows and goats will go through if they are not milked at least once a day; if they are not gradually weaned from milking? Do you honestly think that she will suddenly take an interest in how this farm runs? All those crops I have worked so hard tending will just be left to rot and the animals. I can't..." Kurt's voice broke as his tears began again in earnest. "I can't just let the last year I have spent back here go to waste. It has to have meant something."
"Oh Kurt," Blaine sighed as he took him into his arms. "I didn't even think... I just want you safe and happy. Alright, so we will wait for Puck, see if he knows of any friendly communes close, or anywhere we can go." Blaine took a deep breath before continuing having to force the words out of himself. "If I have to I will come back here when school starts... I just don't want to lose you. You are the first great thing that has ever happened to me."
"You won't lose me... I... I feel the same." Kurt told him kissing him gently, but doing little to ease Blaine's fears. "I just... It will be different out there; I need you to understand that... just because I won't be able to show you as freely, that doesn't mean anything has change... Not how I feel."
How do you feel? Blaine wondered, but gave the thought no voice. Instead, he kissed Kurt, trying to convey everything he felt in that single intense brush of lips.
Supper passed in each other's arms, Blaine having no appetite after the events of the afternoon. Kurt let the time pass without mentioning it, so Blaine assumed he felt the same way. They lay entwined together, silently letting their minds race. Blaine wished he had thought to ask Puck more about the places he went when not at the farm. He couldn't have imagined a time when this farm would not be a safe haven for them though. He wondered if he could be accepted as a late admission in a college close to where Kurt ended up. Would his parents pay for a college if it was across the country, would they pay if it was in Canada? Would they even notice if he disappeared, defied Kurt's wish for his assured safety and just stay wherever he was, would they notice? Would they care?
As they light faded from the room, Kurt pulled Blaine from his increasingly depressing and desperate thoughts. "Blaine?" he asked looking up from where his head rested on Blaine chest. "I... I need..."
"What? What do you need?" Blaine prompted his voice hoarse from disuse.
"I don't know how long we have here... And I don't know when it will be safe for us again. I mean we have to be ready to leave tomorrow if that is when Pick gets here." Kurt rambled while Blaine nodded along, feeling Kurt's desperation, but still not understanding what he was asking for. "I just, I need... I want you to take care of me."
Blaine stroked his cheek gently, "Of course I will take care of you; just tell me what you need me to do."
A blush colored and warmed his cheek in Blaine's hand. "So much is out of my control right now and I am having a hard time trusting the world, but I trust you, Blaine. I always trust you. I need... I need you to be in control tonight. I need to not feel like the weight of the world is falling on top of me." Blaine was still unsure what Kurt was asking of him. He wanted to be whatever Kurt needed in this moment. His confusing must have shown because Kurt sat up and looked him square in the eye before saying, "Make love to me. I need you to make love to me."
Blaine's breathe caught at the request. All they times they had had sex; it was always Kurt inside him. He liked it; it was amazing in fact. He had never even thought... but now that he did, now that the idea was there; he longed to know what it felt like, he wanted to show Kurt just how amazing he made him feel. He slowly nodded, trying desperately to swallow with his throat suddenly dry. He wanted to so much, but he was nervous. His hand shook as he reached for Kurt's face wanting to pull him down into a kiss; but just as his hand landed on that smooth cheek, Kurt's hand enclosed it, holding it steady.
"Hey, don't be nervous, it's just me." He said softly holding Blaine's gaze.
Blaine nodded, a wetted his lips before he spoke, "I just don't want to screw this up."
"You won't, I trust you." Kurt voice was so steady and firm Blaine couldn't help but believe him. However, he didn't have much time to think before Kurt's lips were on his hungry and desperate, crying out to be consumed by Blaine; it was all the encouragement Blaine needed. With only the thought of taking care of Kurt in his mind, Blaine let himself take control of the kiss. A small gasp from Kurt filled the small space between their tongues as Blaine rolled them over pinning Kurt to the bed under his weight. Blaine allowed himself the indulgence of exploring every inch of Kurt's torso with licks and nips on the pale expanse of skin. He sucked marks down the column of his neck, on his collarbone, his ribs, and his stomach; before allowing himself a moment to admire his work. The contrast between Kurt's milky skin and the purpling of the hickeys sent a new flood of desire through him.
Blaine then looked up into Kurt's face; he was looking up at him, breath labored and in even, his face flushed with desire, and his eyes wide and dark but glistening with want. He kept his eyes trained on Kurt as he slid his hand down to the rough fabric of his jeans palming the obvious bulge there. Kurt's head was thrown back at the touch as a low wanton moan fell from his now parted lips which Blaine quickly lowered his head to lick into. Kurt took a moment to respond to the kiss but when he did it was with such enthusiasm it spurred Blaine on. Sucking on Kurt's bottom lip, Blaine unbuttoned his jeans with one hand only to be greeted immediately with the coarse tickle of what he knew was almost auburn pubic hair. He curled his fingers in them enjoying the texture for a moment before grabbing Kurt's length in his hand.
Kurt threw his head back with a gasp at the contact breaking the kiss. Blaine took the opportunity to sit up, take in Kurt's body before beginning to remove his pants. Once Kurt was fully naked, laid out on the bed one knee up its foot placed firmly on the bed, the other leg splayed to the side, on full display for Blaine's eyes only. Blaine stood next to the bed, fully aware of Kurt's eyes on him as the chucked his jeans off exposing himself and finally releasing his aching cock. His breath caught in a chuckle as Kurt made grabby hands at him, clearly not happy with the new distance between them.
Blaine thought back to the first time and wanted to explore Kurt just as fully as he had, but Kurt beautiful dick was calling to him. He laid between Kurt's legs before sinking his mouth over the tip tasting the intense flavor of him. Kurt's hands flailed above him before finding purchase in Blaine's curls pulling at them causing Blaine to moan deeply. Kurt's hips shot up at the sensation and Blaine's mouth was now unexpectedly full of Kurt. He heard mumbled apologies overhead but ignored them as he pulled back before sinking down as far as he could. The almost burn of Kurt hitting the back of his throat, of having to suppress his gag reflex was thrilling and Blaine worked to press his limits. He was getting Kurt deeper and deeper before he felt something weakly batting the hand on Kurt's hips. Blaine pulled up so only the tip still breeched his lips and looked over to see the tub of Vaseline know lying beside his hand. A high "please" resolved any doubt that this was what Kurt wanted, what he yearned for. With one final suck, Blaine released Kurt's cock and opened the tub.
As Blaine slicked his fingers, Kurt made to turn over. "No," Blaine stilled him with his one clean hand, "I want to do it like this."
Kurt nodded, his face flush clearly trying to catch his breath. Blaine grabbed a pillow and urged it one handed under Kurt's hips. Blaine sunk his mouth back over Kurt; a move that was clearly unexpected if the gasp from above was any indication. He wanted to look, but he the hunger for Kurt's taste on his tongue was still too much, so as he sucked gently on Kurt's dick, he circled his finger lightly over his Puckered hole. He could feel Kurt tense a moment before he breathed out another "please". Pushing his index finger slowly inside Kurt was unlike anything he had ever imagined. The tight heat and easy give of the muscles was almost overwhelming even around his finger. A new wave of desire coursed through Blaine at the almost too easy give of Kurt's ass to Blaine. Kurt wanted this, wanted him like this and his body's response was the last indicator Blaine needed. He knew that the more he wanted it the easier it was for Kurt to open him up, to prepare him. Blaine's finger soon was sliding in and out with little resistance.
Blaine pulled back no longer able to resist the pull to see what he was doing to Kurt. He watched as he slid a second finger into Kurt alongside the first. The way his body gripped them, while almost pulling them inside was almost too much to watch and Blaine had to close his eyes to center himself. Repeating what he had felt Kurt do to him so many times, he began to stretch and scissor his fingers opening him more and more. As he pulled his fingers out ready to add a third, Blaine's fingers brushed up against a spongy mass deep within Kurt. Almost immediately Kurt's back arched, his head threw back and a moan rent the air around them. Blaine sat mesmerized at Kurt's response, knowing exactly what he had felt. His third finger had barely breeched the hole when Kurt began panting, "Now... please... now."
Blaine looked up to Kurt's face; his mouth was hanging open on a silent moan, his chest heaving with want and his eyes steady on Blaine. "Blaine please..." he said sounding almost sure that Blaine could even think of denying him.
Blaine hovered over him looking in his eyes, not blinking as he said, "I would do anything in this world for you," before kissing him long and deep. Kurt wrapped his legs around Blaine's waist bringing his cock closer to his ready hole. Blaine needed no more encouragement though and gripped himself in one Vaseline covered hand slicking it and guiding himself to where the tip was just against Kurt. Kurt pulled back from the kiss and with their eyes locked; Blaine slowly began to push in.
The heat surrounding him was almost too much combined with the tight hold Kurt's muscles clenched around him. Blaine resisted the urge to close his eyes though not wanting to break their gaze. He slowly worked his shaft inch by inched deeper into Kurt, until his balls brushed lightly at his ass. He froze there panting taking in Kurt's face his eyes now closed as his breath rose his chest in an uneven rhythm. "You okay?" he asked trying to keep his voice steady while denying his body the ability to just move.
Kurt's eyes flew open at his voice, tears sparkling in the corners. He gulped in a breath before saying, "it's so much... you're so big and... I have never felt so full. It's amazing; we just fit. I love it the other way but... Why didn't you tell me?"
Blaine chuckled; sending vibrations through his body making his dick vibrate with it, both men moaned at the movement. "I... I tried to tell you. It's perfect... We're perfect."
Kurt nodded, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed, "god, move, please move."
It was as if something snapped with in him at the words. He no longer had to hold himself back, his instincts took over, and he pulled back only to allow himself to surge forward once more. He could feel himself chasing his release from the first movement, hips snapping back and forward reveling in the sensations surrounding him. He could not let himself lose himself in the feel though, not without ensuring Kurt was feeling half as much as he was. He kept his eyes on Kurt's face, now contorted in ecstasy. Kurt's movements soon joined his, meeting each thrust. Soon his legs released themselves from their vice hold on his waist. Blaine took advantage and threw one leg over his shoulder so he could thrust even deeper. A keening wail filled the room at the change from Kurt as he hands flailed trying to find something to grip, finally finding purchase in his own hair.
Blaine didn't know how much longer he could hold his orgasm back everything was just so much and the sight of Kurt beneath him writhing in pleasure was enough to almost send him over the edge. He could hear Kurt moaning low, snippets of words reaching him but none identifiable. He was just about to reach between them to pump Kurt's cock with his movement when Kurt clamped down hard on his dick sending him over the edge. As he filled Kurt, he was faintly aware of the sensation of something warm and wet hitting his stomach. As he rocked through the aftershocks he looked down to see Kurt's cum painting their bodies in streaks of white. Kurt lay spent, sprawled loose on the bed, save for the one leg Blaine still had gripped around the ankle, trying to catch his breath with his eyes gently closed.
Blaine's body finally stilled and he slowly lowered Kurt's leg, but still didn't pull out. Kurt eyes slowly opened, and a tired smile filled his lips. "I won't give you up," he mumbled sleepily trying to caress Blaine's thigh but his hand falling short only making vague swatting motions towards it.
Blaine pulled out, both hissing at the movement in their sated over sensitivity. "Never." Blaine promised before taking Kurt in his arms and allowing them to drift to sleep.
Puck didn't return the next day, though that afternoon they packed up most of Kurt's art supplies into crates and some clothes in a bag each, ready to throw into Blaine's car at a moment's notice. Quinn had seemed put out at Kurt's concerns at lunch when they had told her about waiting for Puck before leaving.
Puck didn't show up the day after, or the day after that either. Blaine was getting antsy; feeling the world closing in on their sanctuary with each passing day. He couldn't help but feel they were pushing their luck the longer they waited. Kurt and Blaine clung to each other more each day, not sure when would be their last they would be assured this freedom with each other. More time was spent naked one inside the other, than ever before. They never knew when could be their last time. Never knew once they left, when they could find the privacy to be together, so they fucked until their bodies ached, but ignored the ache and fucked some more while they still could.
A week passed as Puck was still not there. Blaine tried to plead with Quinn at least to learn to take care of the animals and crops so they could get Kurt somewhere safe. She excused herself saying she had an infant to care for trying to urge them to sell the livestock. Kurt left the room soon followed by Blaine when he saw the tears in his eyes.
Nine days after Carole Hudson appeared at the farm, the familiar sound of a vehicle making its way up the gravel driveway met their sex-sated ears in the loft. They quickly threw clothes on; jeans for Blaine, the bright red sarong for Kurt, before making their way down the ladder hoping to meet Puck. Blaine pushed the door open to the barn, but the old work truck was not there. The old station wagon was back. He was just reaching out to stay Kurt where he was when a large man exited the car spotting both of them.
Blaine turned to see Kurt, face sickly pale, freeze behind him staring at the man stalking towards them. "Finn, what are you doing here?" He said voice high and breathless with fear.
The man remained silent as he strode towards them. Blaine took in his appearance; he was extremely tall, his hair closely cropped to his head, fitting with the uniform on his body. He was clearly a Marine and he did not look happy. His face was scrunched up in a scowl as he continued to close the space. Blaine's mind finally put it together. This was Finn, Kurt's almost stepbrother.
As Finn stopped in front of Kurt, ignoring Blaine's presence completely he pulled a now opened envelope out of his pocket. "What is this?" he practically growled at Kurt.
"I have no idea, why don't you tell me?" Kurt replied in a high voice though his face wore a mask of cool indifference.
"Says here that you are to report for induction tomorrow. But you are planning to run away like a pansy ass coward aren't you?" Finn roared thrusting the paper in Kurt's hand, a look of disgust on his face.
Kurt's whole demeanor changed at the words; no longer was he cowering back from the imposing figure before him, his spine straightened and he held himself determined at his full height. "Not wanting to be a murderer does not make me a coward. The world is not all black and white; it is not just us against them. I don't know when you are going to see that." His voice was full of cool resolve again.
"Your idealism was fine in high school Kurt, but you are a man now and your country needs you. I won't allow you to shirk your responsibility." Finn yelled back.
"This is not your concern Finn, what I do is no concern of yours." Blaine watched as Kurt made to turn around and walk back into the barn. Finn's words froze him in his spot.
"It is when you bring my mother into it. Do you know she didn't even tell me? I found that in her bills. If they come looking for you they will go to her first. I don't need you messing with my family because you can't man up and do what is right!"
"I'm trying to do what is right," Kurt turned to him, "and there was a time when you considered me family too. Do you have any idea what your enlisting has done to your mother? Do you think the police coming to question my whereabouts is anything compared to worrying if you are going to come back home alive does to her? Maybe you should have thought of her before you put that damned uniform on."
"I was thinking of her, I was thinking of her and my country, trying to protect it. All you are thinking of is yourself." Finn shot back, a nerve clearly hit by Kurt's remark.
Kurt sighed, a deep weary sound. "We will just have to agree to disagree. There is nothing you can do, you can't force me..."
"I can and I will," Finn said, voice calm once more. "I know who to call, I can bring them right here to this farm, if you leave I can have them trail that car," he said pointing to Blaine's Mustang that sat in the driveway. "I have the license plate number written down. I won't hesitate to do it."
Kurt's face lost what little color it had regained, he glanced over at Blaine worry clear on his face. Blaine knew in that moment that even faced with prison and the draft, Kurt was worrying about him first. He wanted to snatch him away from this foe that now stood in the middle of their safe haven and whisk Kurt to safety. A minute shake of Kurt's head stilled any motion though. So Blaine stood there to watch how this would play out, for the moment anyway.
"What do you want me to do?" Kurt asked defeated.
"You are to report for induction in Columbus, and I am not letting you out of my sight until then." Finn said, folding his arms in front of his chest. Kurt stood there for a moment, Blaine wanted to scream out that he couldn't go, but knew it would do no good. If Kurt made his mind up about something, there was no changing it. He watched as Kurt's shoulders sagged in defeat.
He started towards the house. "Where do you think you are going?" Finn yelled anger clear in his voice.
Kurt turned calmly to him, "To put some clothes on and grab my wallet. I would be safe to assume, that I don't need to pack, am I correct." He didn't wait for an answer just turned and stalked towards the house. Blaine followed feeling like a lost puppy. This couldn't be happening; Kurt couldn't be just giving in like this. He followed Kurt into his room, both still silent.
As Kurt's hand reached for the knot of his sarong, the lump in Blaine's throat broke enough to allow him to speak. "You can't go," he said quietly.
Kurt turned to him, and Blaine closed the space between them when he saw tears in his eyes. "I don't have a choice; I can't risk them getting you too. I don't know what they would do if they found out you helped me runaway. I can't risk you, I won't risk you."
"Kurt, you can't worry about me, you need to worry about yourself for once. Let me worry about you; let me take care of you. We will think of something." Blaine spoke feeling more desperate than he thought possible.
Kurt pushed himself away, turning his back on Blaine. "No matter what happens, I am going to be away for a long time. Either I will be in prison or waiting for my death in the jungle. I can't expect you to wait for me, not like this."
"What are you saying?" Blaine's heart was pounding in his chest. He didn't like the broken way Kurt sounded or the words he was saying. Blaine wished desperately that this were a misunderstanding.
"I'm saying, you are free of me. It may be hard, but I am sure you will find someone else." Kurt's voice held little emotion as he grabbed a pair of jeans from a drawer.
"I don't want anyone else. God Kurt! I love you damn it; I only want you! We don't know what will happen but I would wait forever for you." Blaine's said grabbing at Kurt's shoulders trying to make him turn around, to look at him.
"Please Blaine don't make this harder than it is." Kurt pleaded, still not turning to face Blaine. Having enough, Blaine moved in front of him, holding Kurt in place as he ducked his head to catch Kurt's eyes. Tears trickled down his face, matching those fighting to fall from Blaine's own eyes.
"I love you; nothing is going to make you breaking up with me easier. I will fight for you Kurt; I won't let you toss away what we have that easily." Blaine said, lifting Kurt's chin so they were looking at each other properly.
"I can't fight Blaine, they expect to put a gun in my hand and... I can't. They are going to put me in a barrack with a group of guys, training to fight, to kill and if they find out I'm a fag... I'm dead. If they put me in prison and any one finds out... I'm dead. I don't see this ending well no matter what. I just... I can't know you are here waiting for someone to come tell you that I'm never coming home. I can't..." Kurt tried once more to turn away as his tears fell with renewed vigor.
Blaine refused to let him turn away. He stole a kiss, happy when Kurt returned it immediately. "We just have to have hope. Isn't that all that we really have in the world sometimes. We have to hope; hope that one day the world we will better, hope that we can make it through, hope that the things, the people we love won't be taken away from us, hope that tomorrow will be better. You give me the strength to hope Kurt; I want to be that strength for you too. I love you so much, I'm not just saying it because you are about to walk out that door; I should have been saying it for a long time, but I was scared. I was scared of losing you, of scaring you off with feelings you don't share. But right now I don't have time to be scared about that, you're already trying to lose me and I can't let that happen without you knowing how I feel. Please don't give up on us."
Blaine's heart beat out an erratic rhythm as he waited for Kurt to answer. Fear and dread were mingling in his stomach, almost tramping out the flicker of hope that usually resided there. Slowly, Kurt nodded a small joyless smile on his face. "You know just because I was trying to set you free doesn't mean I was giving up. I wanted freedom for you, not myself. There will be no one else for me."
"Kurt?" Blaine squeaked out, not knowing what to say, not daring to think what he could possibly mean.
"I love you too, Blaine. I never said before... I guess because I was scared, afraid that it wasn't the same for you." Kurt's body suddenly began trembling and Blaine caught him in his arms.
"Blaine, I am so scared. It wasn't supposed to happen this way; it wasn't supposed to end like this."
Blaine lowered them to sit on the bed. "Hey, who said this is the end. It's not the end of us; I don't care what happens this can't be the end of us. I will be waiting for you, whether you want me to or not. Your only job is to come back home to me." Kurt sobbed against Blaine's chest where he collapsed against him. Blaine ran his hands through Kurt's long hair, letting the soft brush sooth them both. After Kurt's sobs died down Blaine asked, "what do you want to do?"
"I don't think I have much choice, I can't fight Finn,"
"I can." Blaine interrupted.
"I still don't think violence is the answer," Kurt laughed. "I guess I just go, and hope for the best. I will do what I can to come home to you, the quicker the better." Blaine nodded before sneaking another kiss. "I'll write as soon as I know something. Can you stay here at least until Puck comes back?"
"I will stay here as long as I can, hopefully until you get back and this is all behind us." Blaine said squeezing his hand.
Blaine helped Kurt dress, it was the most solemn time they had ever spent together. Once fully dressed, his wallet in his pocket, Kurt turned towards Blaine once again. "I love you, I love you, and I love you. I would love to say it for all the times I should have, but there's not the time." Kurt leaned in and kissed Blaine and he knew it was a goodbye. It was a goodbye neither wanted, but it was out of his control. Blaine just had to hope there would be a hello soon to make up for the ache in his heart.
Finn looked ready to storm into the house when they finally made it outside a good hour after entering. The only thing that stopped him was Quinn sitting stone-faced on the porch, holding baby Beth. "I don't think I have ever hated you more Finn Hudson," she said before taking Kurt into her arms. Blaine couldn't hear what she whispered to Kurt, but saw the tears in both their eyes. Blaine had to suppress his again as soon as Kurt took Beth gingerly in his arms, placing kisses on her face and hair, whispering words of love softly to her. He could see the reluctance on his face as he handed her back to her mother.
Blaine saw Kurt shoot Finn a defiant look before moving to hug Blaine one last time. "I love you." Kurt whispered in his ear. Blaine squeezed back tightly, adding his own "I love you" before reluctantly releasing him. He longed to reach out and take Kurt in his arms again and never let go, but knew it would do no good. He watched as Kurt climbed in the station wagon, hand held to the window as if longing for one final touch.
As the car turned away, he saw Kurt turned in his seat, tears making their way down his cheek. One final wave of his hand and he was disappearing from sight. Blaine collapsed in the dirty farmyard, no longer having the strength to hold himself together. Huge body aching sobs wracked his body, feeling his heart ache as it tried to reach out for Kurt. His head swam and his stomach turned, he felt disoriented in this new world without Kurt beside him. Just when he felt like he might just fly away without Kurt anchoring him to this world, he felt an arm wrap gently around his shoulder as two bodies, one large the other tiny pressed against him. He vaguely registered a small hand batting at his face, squeezing his nose as he let himself cry. He didn't even notice himself chanting, "I love him," over and over again. Nor did he hear Quinn respond, "I know," with the same assuredness.