"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Tina asked as she threw Blaine the sweater vest from his bag. He had told Kurt that he was off work half an hour later than he actually was so he would have time to change out of his work clothes before meeting with him.

Blaine pulled the vest over his head and made sure it fit properly over his shirt. He fastened his favorite bowtie around his neck and checked his hair in the mirror one more time before turning to face Tina.

"Why wouldn't it be a good idea?" He asked her with his arms crossed over his chest to not let her see how nervous he was. He knew why she didn't think it was a good idea - she had been bugging him about it since Kurt had shown up in he pub.

After he and Tina had got off work the day he and Kurt had agreed to meet, Blaine had told her about their short talk and how they had planned to meet. He had been ecstatic and excited but still confused and baffled by the surprise.

Tina hadn't said much during his story of what had happened, but stayed silent and observed him talk. When he was done rambling on about it he had felt that she wasn't as excited as he was. She had been happy for him, but as he continued his excitement over the week he had felt that she was worried. Now they were in the bathroom of the pub and he was getting ready to meet Kurt again.

"You know why, Blaine. You may just have been kids, but when he moved away you were really hurt. I could feel it in you for over a year," Tina said nervously.

"Yeah, but… like you said; we were just kids. That was 12 years ago. We're just gonna catch up. It's not like I'm expecting us to go back to being best friends again," Blaine defended himself and rolled his eyes at her, unsure whether it was because he really thought it couldn't do any harm, or if he was so uncertain about the situation that he wanted to cover it up.

He made sure his hair was combed finely, and he put on his own shoes instead of the ones he wore for work. There was no way he would wear his own shoes for work when they could so easily be ruined by different kinds of beverages being spilled all the time.

He checked his watch and saw that there was 7 minutes left until he was supposed to meet Kurt at the bar. He headed for the door but Tina stopped him by putting a hand on his arm a little firmer than usual.

"Did you tell Sebastian about this?" She asked him, and Blaine felt his throat tie up.

Why would she ask that now? He thought with freezing blood.

He didn't look at her, but pretended to be extremely interested in something on the door in front of him, but clearly not convincing her.

"You never told him about Kurt, did you? About what he meant to you," she inquired softly.

She wasn't judging, and Blaine knew that she wasn't trying to make him feel guilty - but he did. He felt awfully guilty. He wanted to tell her that he had told Sebastian everything about himself because there wasn't really anything to tell.

That was what he had told himself all of his life. He had grown up in an orphanage in Lima, Ohio, found out he was gay, went through high school like everyone else and moved to New York with his friends so they could chase their dreams. End of story.

Only it wasn't. There was bits and parts of his life that he hadn't told anyone. Parts about how his family had died in flames, how he had been best friends with a boy that became his entire world, how this boy had left him so he could go live with his dad and how Blaine had cried himself to sleep from missing that boy for almost a year.

How he still he remembered the way the boy had kissed him in the rain while they had been looking for a cat in the bushes, or how he sometimes still had nightmares where he was back to being a child and watched the boy leave him while he was locked to his bed in the orphanage dormitory and he couldn't do anything but cry and scream for his friend not to leave him.

"There's nothing to tell. Kurt and I were friends and he moved away, that's all," Blaine shrugged without facing Tina, but he could feel the burning of her eyes on his face.

However, she stroke her thumb over his arm a few times before she released her grip and let him leave the bathroom with his head spinning and his mouth dry.

xXx

When Blaine entered the apartment Tina and Mike were curled up on the couch watching American Idol. He let his bag dump to the dining table and fell down at the end of the couch receiving glances from Tina and Mike.

"So… how did your… thing… with Kurt go?" Tina asked and sat up to get a proper look at him. As soon as she saw the expression on his face her own mood dropped as well.

"He… didn't show. He never came. I waited for an hour, but he didn't come, so I got a few drinks with Martin instead." Blaine shrugged and felt his eyes roll. He probably had a few more drinks than he should have.

"I'm sor -" Tina started but was caught off.

"I'm gonna go to bed," Blaine declared and got to his feet. He grabbed his bag and headed for his room where he closed the door a little more forceful than he intended to and plunked face forward on the bed.

He didn't know why it mattered so much. Like he had told Tina; it wasn't like he was expecting them to go back to being best friends by the end of the night or anything. They were just supposed to catch up.

He's probably changed and leading a great life. It's lame. I'll never see him again so it's no big deal, Blaine thought and groaned into his pillow before he turned to lie on his back.

There was a light knock on the door and Tina stuck in her head. He nodded at her to show her that it was okay and she came in to lie on the bed next to him. She laid down to look at the ceiling the way he did it and sighed heavily.

"You're really upset about this, aren't you?"

"No I'm not, I don't care. He can just go and hide in a -" Blaine started to object snarky but regretted halfway there. Tina knew him better than anyone and she would see right through him - she already had seen right through him.

"Okay, I'm sort of upset. Why didn't he come?" Blaine moaned a bit more whiny than he wanted and turned to face her.

"I don't know. Maybe he's turned into a jerk and forgot all about it, or maybe something happened like last week," Tina suggested.

Blaine was sure that she was debating whether to encourage him to keep on thinking of Kurt as a good person, or if she should encourage him to think that Kurt had turned into an idiot and he was better off without getting to know him like that.

Blaine's phone vibrated but he didn't even bother to reach for it. It was just a text. Tina smiled warmly at him and brushed a hand maternally over his cheek. He liked when she did that; it made him feel safe.

"Maybe you should just go to sleep. One more drink and you'd be pissed drunk," Tina cooed and yawned.

His phone vibrated again. One more text. Someone sure was interested in getting a hold of him considering it was nearly 11 on a Monday night.

"Yeah, I probably should," Blaine yawned and hugged Tina before she got to her feet. She staggered towards the door on sleepy feet, but turned before she opened to leave.

"I'm sorry he didn't come. I think it might be for the best. G'night," she said and left his room.

Blaine groaned loudly into the room again when he heard them turn off the TV and retreat to their own room. He started stripping off his clothes and headed for the bathroom to brush his teeth.

He only got to turn off the lights and fall to his pillow before his phone vibrated again. This time it kept vibrating and he remembered that he had turned off the sound while drinking with Martin because he didn't want to talk to anyone. He sighed and grabbed for it to answer the call.

"Hey gorgeous. Are you asleep already?"Sebastian's voice sounded from the other end.

Ugh, he didn't want to talk to Sebastian right now. He just wanted to be alone and feel his self-pity burn in his brain, and sleep off the drinks.

"Almost," Blaine merely answered, not sure what to say without hurting his boyfriend's feelings.

"Are you drunk, babe?"Sebastian asked.

Dammit. How does he always know?

"No. I'm not drunk. I had a few drinks that's all," Blaine objected. He rubbed his eyes and hoped that Sebastian would take his lazy voice as a hint that he needed to sleep.

"Aww, and you didn't think to invite me? I was just stuck in the office, left to miss you,"Sebastian whined exaggeratedly.

Because this was exactly what Blaine needed. As if he didn't feel guilty enough for having planned to meet with another guy without telling Sebastian about it, now he was also cute and sweet.

"I was actually calling to ask you if you wanted me to sleep over tonight? I miss you a lot and I just wanna sleep next to you."

Blaine's insides started turning, and he couldn't decide if he felt sick because of the too-many-drinks or because of himself. There was no way he could look Sebastian in the eyes right now.

"I… I don't feel so good. Can we do it tomorrow? Or something?" Blaine asked awkwardly, a wish to kick himself spreading from his brain through his body.

"Are you sure? If you're sick I can take care of you, baby. It's alright,"Sebastian said, now sounding cautious and worried.

"I just need some sleep that's all. Thanks, honey," Blaine said thickly. He turned to lie on his front and nearly dropped the phone as he heard the heavy silence spread through the phone.

"Okay. Just call me if you need anything. It's no problem. But… get some sleep. I really miss you, Blaine,"Sebastian crooned through the phone and hummed lightly into the receiver.

"I will. Thanks. I just… goodnight, okay," Blaine said and they both hung up.

And now he was ready to either throw up, cry or jump out of the window.

Sebastian had clearly been hurt that he didn't want to have him come over, and even more hurt that he didn't want him to take care of him if he was sick. Only thing in the world Blaine found worse than hurting Sebastian's feeling over the phone was to hurt his feelings to his face. At least now he hadn't seen his eyes fill with disappointment - only heard it in his voice