Feb. 24, 2012, 4:45 p.m.
Something Ordinary: Chapter 11
E - Words: 3,158 - Last Updated: Feb 24, 2012 Story: Complete - Chapters: 22/22 - Created: Oct 23, 2011 - Updated: Apr 13, 2022 993 0 8 0 0
"You're telling me – why?" asked Blaine, disbelief obvious in his voice. It still sounded a bit rough, since he had barely spoken a word since his outburst on Kurt's living room.
"To be honest, I don't know." Kurt whispered, frowning. He seemed genuinely confused.
Blaine's eyes darted everywhere as he tried to wrap his head around what was happening. He felt like in a bizarre, but wanted, dream. And yet, it was real. Kurt was finally opening up to him. He was finally uncovering the mystery. He didn't know what had inspired Kurt to do so, but he wasn't complaining. He had been given the opportunity to understand the man lying next to him.
He looked up and found those incredible glasz eyes staring right back at him. They stayed like that for a while, eyeing each other as Blaine waited patiently for Kurt to begin his story. After what seemed like a long time had passed, Kurt started speaking.
"I used to be like you, Blaine. A hopeless romantic, yearning for the day when I'd find my prince charming and we'd ride into the horizon towards our happily-ever-after. I had every detail of my wedding planned out since I was about 5."
Kurt admired the boy's face as his mind took a trip down memory lane. The beautiful hazel orbs seemed to be chained to his baby blues. Blaine was paying attention to every word.
"When I entered high school, I fell in love... with Finn." Blaine's eyes widened and Kurt laughed at the adorable expression. "Yes, I used to have a major crush on my stepbrother. But I grew out of it eventually and Finn found Rachel. There were some other guys that caught my eye but nothing big."
"And then, during my junior year, I began noticing this one guy. He was part of the football team and really popular. His name was David Karofsky."
Blaine noticed the way Kurt's eyes turned ice cold as the name escaped his mouth. His voice even sounded vicious for the briefest moment.
"I swooned over him but I knew he'd never even give me a second glance. I had been glaringly obvious about my crush with Finn and learned from that, so I tried to keep this new crush to myself. I ended up only telling Rachel. It was, after all, a silly, pointless crush. But then we began our senior year and one day, he unexpectedly came to talk to me."
The halls were completely empty. Kurt had run late for his next class but he really needed to get something out of his locker. He was searching through it when he heard footsteps drawing near him.
"Hi."
He froze as he recognized the voice that had just addressed him. It sounded so familiar, after fantasizing with it for such a long time. Slowly, he turned to face none other than Dave Karofsky, who was leaning against the lockers and giving him a sly smile.
"Hi," Kurt answered back weakly, breathlessly.
"Kurt, right?" said boy nodded quickly. "So, Kurt… wanna hang out sometime?"
"Of course, I said yes right away. I couldn't believe that the very guy I had been crushing on for so long wanted to hang out with me. He told me to wait for him in the parking lot once classes were over. He led me to his car and we just drove around town, talking about anything and everything. He said he had wanted to get to know me better for a long time. I got home that day and I remember feeling like I had landed among the stars."
Kurt was looking behind Blaine, seemingly lost in his remembrances. Blaine kept examining his face, noticing how his face would soften at some parts of his tale, just to harden moments later.
"We started hanging out after that. It was a bit hard, but we managed. He'd take me to the movies or to grab a bite somewhere but under the excuse that we were "lab partners" or that I was tutoring him. He had told me from the very beginning that he wasn't ready for the world to know and I accepted that. So, even if we did go out from time to time, mainly we just hanged out at his house."
"At school, of course, we kept out of each other's path. But sometimes, he'd manage to brush his arm next to mine on the hallways or give me a little wink in the classroom. Sometimes he'd trot near the bleachers where I was sitting during his football matches. It wasn't much, but it meant the world to me."
Kurt laughed bitterly and looked away from Blaine. He fixed his eyes on the ceiling as he continued talking.
"And he was just so sweet to me when we were together in the safety of his room. He was the very first boy I kissed. He took almost all of my firsts slowly, sweetly – my first kiss, my first date, my first 'boyfriend', my first…love. And at the time, I thought it was perfect. I still kept secretly waiting for the day he'd come out and we could finally be all lovey-dovey together publicly. But I didn't push."
Blaine was at a loss. Even when he felt jealousy consuming him, he couldn't deny the fact that this guy sounded great. Okay, so he wanted them to date secretly but that wasn't bad enough to make Kurt give up on love, right?
"He sounds… nice," Blaine found himself saying before he could stop himself.
Kurt tensed up immediately. His eyes went cold and he locked them with Blaine's. He flinched slightly at the intensity of Kurt's gaze and regretted opening his mouth in the first place. The older boy noticed Blaine's uneasiness and his eyes softened a little. He lowered his gaze and attempted – and failed– to smile.
"I guess I have been talking like he was a fucking Disney prince, huh? Yeah, I also thought he shot rainbows out of his ass back then. But I'd soon learn it wasn't like that. At all."
Blaine frowned at that comment. Kurt sighed heavily and unconsciously grabbed Blaine's hand.
"When the end of the school year drew near, someone threw a party. He and I agreed to go but, naturally, not together. So I arrived there with Finn and Rachel. I spotted him right away, chatting with his friends from the football team. I knew he wouldn't come close to me that night so I decided to just have a fun night with my friends."
"But then, I was talking to a girl when I got tapped on the shoulder. I turn around to find him standing behind me."
"Come with me."
Kurt's eyes widened. He opened his mouth to answer something but nothing came out. He nodded and turned to apologize to the girl that was talking to him. He followed David, who led him upstairs.
"Dave? Where are we going? And you know people are seeing us."
"Shhh, it's okay. Come on."
He opened a door and turned to Kurt. "After you," he said as he gestured inside the bedroom.
It was completely dark and just when Kurt was about to turn around to ask what they were doing there, a voice was heard.
"You really went through with it, Dave."
"Hey, a deal's a deal, right?" Kurt heard David say from behind.
He frowned in confusion and whirled around to face him.
"A deal? What are you talking about? And who's in there?"
But David didn't answer back. Suddenly, Kurt heard a click and the room lit up by a lamp on the night table. He could finally see David's face, which had an unreadable expression on it. Slowly, fearfully, he turned around to find two other jocks. One of them was tall and blond. The other one was dark-skinned and burly. They were giving him weird smiles that made him feel extremely uncomfortable.
"What's up, fag?" The burly one said, the last word pronounced viciously. Kurt flinched and tried to back away, only to be stopped by David's arms.
"What-? David! What is this? I-I…"
"I want my money first," David said, addressing the boys standing in front of them.
"Your money? A deal?" Kurt's eyes widened and he twisted his neck to try and get a look at David's face. Realization came to him as he whispered, eyes wide. "It was all a lie?"
A painful expression shot across David's face, so quickly that Kurt thought he had imagined it. He smirked and answered cruelly.
"Can't believe you bought it, you disgusting fag."
The other two boys laughed and Kurt turned to look at them.
"Man, you really did an awesome job. Just look at that shocked face," the blond one commented as he and his friend started approaching Kurt, who tried to get away from David's tight grip.
"We made a bet, you see, little queer? We wanted to know just how big of a cockslut you were. So we agreed he'd pretend to be interested in you and offer to date you. And you bought it so easily! But you know what the worst part of it was? You actually took up the damn offer!"
The burly boy laughed loudly. "You truly are a cockslut!"
Tears were threatening to appear but Kurt fought them with all he had. He knew that if he started crying now, it would only make things worse. He felt so heartbroken, so terribly deluded. Yes, he had been stupid enough to think David Karoksky actually loved him.
"My money. Now," he heard David say and the blond guy took out his wallet, pulling several dollar bills out of it and handing them over to him.
He took them with one hand and eyed them briefly before putting them on his pocket. Kurt watched the exchange, not believing his eyes. He felt like he was in a nightmare and he'd wake up at any moment. Only he didn't
All of a sudden, he was roughly pushed to the bed by David's strong arms. Kurt shifted rapidly in the bed until his back was pressed against the headboard. He was panicking and thought about screaming but the blasting music playing downstairs would not let anyone hear him.
David leaned against the door with his arms crossed as he watched his friends come near the bed, forcefully pulling Kurt out of it. Their eyes were so filled with hate that Kurt started trembling uncontrollably.
"Please…" he said in a tight voice. The burly one laughed but the blond one's face twisted in anger and disgust.
"Queer!" he yelled as he punched Kurt on his stomach. He bent down in pain and groaned.
The tears he had fought before could not stop now and just as he had predicted, they made the situation worse
"Man up, you fucking fag!" The blond said as he launched a direct blow on Kurt's face that had him hit the floor.
They took the opportunity and continued to punch and kick him with David witnessing it all from his spot near the door. Kurt kept asking frantically for them to stop but to no avail, the blows just kept coming. He could feel the taste of blood in his lips and his vision was getting blurry. He covered his face as the two boys continued to kick him mercilessly.
Just as he thought he was about to lose consciousness, he heard the unmistakable sound of someone's belt being unbuckled.
"God, no…" was the last thing he said before blackness took him in.
"You can guess what happened after I passed out," said Kurt quietly. "I lost and regained consciousness through it all. They took turns, except Karofsky. He just stood there, enjoying the show."
Blaine felt sick. His head was spinning as he tried to process Kurt's horrid tale. He was breathing heavily, bordering hyperventilation.
"When they were done, they were kind enough to put my clothes back on," Kurt added sarcastically. "I was left lying there for I don't know how long. Finn was the one that found me. He came looking for me since he and Rachel wanted to go. They rushed me to the hospital. I was in pretty bad shape, broken ribs, broken arm and a black eye, all of it. My parents arrived soon after and demanded for me to have every test, medicine, procedure needed to fix me."
Blaine squeezed Kurt's hand and closed his eyes tightly as the image of a bloody, bruised Kurt filled his thoughts. He felt a lump on his throat beginning to form.
"The doctors obviously found out I'd been raped but since I was already eighteen I begged them not to tell my parents. They weren't taking it so I had to make up some shit about how I'd sue them for breaking the doctor-patient confidentiality code or whatever."
"But, why?" Blaine interrupted, "Why wouldn't you want them to know? They should've paid for what they did to you!"
Kurt smiled at the younger boy and shook his head.
"I was embarrassed, Blaine. I felt dirty and broken. No way in hell I was letting them know. But of course, the doctors didn't listen to me. They told my parents and they lost it. My dad looked like he could kill someone. Carole was completely devastated. Finn blamed himself for not keeping an eye on me during the party. The family was a mess. Those were some pretty nasty days. The story made headlines, the police took the case and I was left in the hospital for quite the amount of time."
"And, what happened with – with them?" Blaine asked.
"They arrested the boys that essentially attacked me but Karofsky walked free since he didn't actually touch me. They couldn't even prove he had been in the same room at the time of… well, it."
Blaine's mouth fell open in disbelief. He cursed himself for getting ahead of the facts and actually commenting that this Karofksy was a nice guy.
"I returned to school shortly after they had prosecuted them. And soon enough, things went back to normal. But it wasn't the same for me. I wasn't the same, I would never be the same. I couldn't even pretend or try to be the person I was before the incident. I just didn't give a damn anymore. After all, what good was to love someone, anyone, when all you got from it was getting tricked, raped and beaten the hell out of you?"
"But – "
"Love always ends in heartbreak, Blaine." Kurt said forcefully, "And some people get the worse of it. I did and know the word doesn't mean anything to me anymore. Love turned me into the asshole I am now. I loved someone once and it was the worst thing that ever happened to me. So, no, I don't believe in love and fairytales and all that shit I used to believe in anymore."
Blaine couldn't help but feel bad for Kurt. It angered him and made him wish they had been the same age and attended high school together. Maybe things could have gone differently. Maybe they could have fallen in love. Maybe they'd be lying in bed like they were right now, but blissfully married or engaged or something. But they weren't.
He could now understand him and for some reason – even if he knew it was pointless – it made him fall even more in love with Kurt. He sighed and turned to look at Kurt. But the moment their eyes met, Kurt looked away and said harshly.
"Don't give me that look."
He got up and turned his back on Blaine.
"What look?" Blaine asked confused as he propped on his elbows.
"The pity look. I didn't tell you all of this so you could feel sorry for me. I don't need this crap."
Blaine shifted closer to him. "I-I didn't mean to, I'm sorry. I just… I hate that you had to go through that." His voice broke at that last part, making Kurt turn to get a look of his face.
He whirled back around and scoffed. "Yeah, well whatever. Now you know the truth."
Blaine's eyes softened and he wrapped his arms around Kurt.
"Thank you. Thank you for trusting me." He said his voice thick with emotion.
Kurt placed his hand above Blaine's and smiled. They stayed like that for a while until Kurt spoke again.
"I don't think I ever talked about this before," he said absentmindedly.
Blaine's eyes widened at the confession. He suddenly felt so special upon hearing those words. He had been the first person Kurt had opened up to. Even if he kept telling himself not to get his hopes up, this should mean something.
"I'm glad I told you," Kurt breathed and Blaine felt like his heart would burst in his chest.
He smiled and sighed, tightening his grip on Kurt and resting his head on his shoulder. "Me too."
Kurt slowly turned his head and met the younger boy's eyes. They stared at each other before Kurt closed the gap between them, kissing him sweetly.
Blaine sighed into the kiss and when they broke apart he giggled. Kurt turned around so that they were face to face, their knees touching. He kissed Blaine again and rested their foreheads together.
Blaine closed his eyes and whispered.
"Weren't we supposed to be 'just friends'?"
Kurt, whose eyes were also closed, smiled widely.
"Fuck it. I like kissing you way too much for that."
Both opened their eyes simultaneously and smiled at each other. Kurt backed his head a little and took Blaine's hand.
"Listen, I really like being with you. And it's not because you are surprisingly good in bed, you know, for a newbie."
Blaine laughed and rolled his eyes.
"Way to ruin the moment, Kurt."
Kurt smiled at him and carried on. "I can't promise anything, not even monogamy but – I want to be with you."
Blaine's breath got caught up in his throat. He stared at the boy in front of him with his eyebrows raised and his lips slightly parted.
"But when I say I can't make any promises I really mean it. If you take the offer you need to keep that in mind. I will probably still want to go out and fool around. But I also want to give this," he gestured between them, "a try, somehow. So what do you say?"
Blaine thought about it. It was risky and he knew that. Kurt had said it; he couldn't even promise he'd be faithful. He could end up terribly hurt and heartbroken. But on the other hand, he could – miraculously – get Kurt to believe in love again. And he loved Kurt enough to take that risk.
"I'm in," he simply said.
Kurt gave him a crooked smile and closed the gap between them, kissing him deeply. Blaine tangled his hands on Kurt's hair and sighed contently. Kurt slowly pushed him back into the bed, their lips never parting.
Once air became necessary, they broke apart and stared into each other's eyes. Blaine felt like he was losing himself in the vastness of Kurt's beautiful eyes. He reached up, cupped Kurt's face in his hands and brought their mouths together again.
'He is definitely worth the risk.'
Comments
You are doing such a good job with this. I don't know what to say...
Thank you!!! I'm glad you're liking it!! <3
So many feelings during this chapter! I feel so bad for Kurt, and happy that they are somewhat closer. Gosh, update soon, please.
I will, I promise! And thank you so much for reviewing constantly <3
Oh, I totally missed that! Thank you so much for pointing it out for me :) I'll make the correction asap. Thank you for reviewing! <3
This story is intriguing and I'm looking forward to how Kurt learns to love again. Nitpick grammar lesson: The past tense of hang is almost always hung, as in I hung up the phone. The only instance hanged is the past tense of the verb involves a noose around someone's neck. He hung the rope, he hanged the man.
Ahhhh!!! So good! Omg! Blaine should use Karosfsky's face as a punching bag! Grrr! It's so beautiful!!
(btw. I read your entire story in one sitting yesterday, but I wanted to review them now since it was kind of hard to review them on my phone lol...but anyhow...) this chapter broke my heart. :'( like really, it's scattered all over the place. --and I know Kurt comes from a good place wanting to have something with Blaine, but his inability to promise monogamy worries me :s