Title: Stormin the Castle

Rating: T

Pairing: Kurtbastian (mentions of past Klaine)

Words: 583

Summary: From the Ridiculous Sentence Prompt “I understand the whole sleep talking thing but what I don't understand is the princess dragon dream and why I'm in it.” I hope you enjoy this crack.

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Kurt rolled over and grunted. He rolled over again and pulled his pillow over his head, wrapping it around his ears as best he could but he still couldnt shut his boyfriends noises out. He cursed, then flopped restlessly onto his side and glanced through his narrowly slitted eyes at the sleeping boy beside him.

Oh, yes. Sebastian was definitely asleep. He just also happened to be talking in his sleep. And not even just talking. He seemed to be in some epic battle given the grunts, groans, and kicking. Speaking of which…

"Ouch! Fuck!" Kurt hissed, curling up into a fetal position and holding his balls. That was Sebastians knee. And it hurt. Badly. He glared at his boyfriend and promised himself that as soon as he could move again hed wake the boy up in the most painful way possible.

In the meantime, the NYU senior kept talking in his sleep. "Ha! Take that you… you stupid hobbit dragon you…" he muttered with a sharp thrust of his arm as if he was stabbing something with a sword. "Teach you to take mmm… my Princess…" He almost sounded drugged, which made Kurt snicker. He should record this and put it on the internet. Hed be famous in no time. Or at least Bas would.

"Dammit, Bas, will you please shut up?" Kurt whined in a high pitched tone that apparently worked like an alarm clock for his boyfriend. Hmm. Good to know. He still had sore balls though, and he was exhausted, so he wasnt likely to store that useful knowledge too well.

Green eyes blinked awake and peered happily at Kurt. "Oh, hey beautiful. Was just dreamin about you…" he said with a yawn, obviously still half asleep and not noticing his boyfriends pained expression.

Kurt righted himself and sat up on the bed, barely wincing at the lingering throbbing between his legs and giving his boyfriend a strange look. "Okay…I understand the whole sleep talking thing, but what I dont understand is the whole princess dragon dream and why Im in it. Also, I think you called the dragon a hobbit and… what the hell, Bas?"

Sebastian looked at him with a raised brow and a smirk that should have been trademarked by now. "Really Princess? You cant figure out your role in this dream?" Kurts growl made him laugh, but he kept explaining anyway. "The dragon is very hobbit-like and seems to think he has a claim on whats mine even though the princess hasnt wanted the dragon for many years now. Hes a very persistent thing…"

It clicked and Kurt laughed, imagining Blaine the dragon keeping him locked in some tower so hed not be Sebastians anymore. "Honey, your brain is warped," he stated simply, leaning in to kiss his boyfriend of over three years now. "Maybe you should reassure it that you have nobody to fight for my affections?"

The smirk on Sebastians face grew as Kurt crawled over his body, straddling his hips and rocking their barely-clothed bodies together. "Mmm, I like the way your warped brain works…" he growled, thrusting up against Kurt.

"Hey, my brain isnt the one making fairytales come to life in my dreams. Nor does it cause me to knee my boyfriends nuts. You owe me, Meerkat." And Sebastian definitely took care of those injured balls… he worshipped his Princess like any good knight would. Needless to say, Kurt finally slept soundly by the time sleep was once again had.