When all is said and done
Chapter 27
7 days until New York…
Kurt struggled desperately trying to pull away from the grasping hands and lips and the tongue that was now pushing at his own lips; begging for entry. Kurt stamped his foot down on his attackers own foot and gave him a sharp kick in the shins.
“Argh!” Marco cried as he recoiled back slightly. “What was that for?” he asked innocently.
Kurt just stared at him, his eyes filling up with tears and his mouth hanging open in shock. That’s when it hit Marco; shame and guilt interwoven. He suddenly realised that this was a bad idea; he had just forced a kiss on someone. He didn’t know what he had expected to happen after he kissed Kurt but not this. Kurt just stood there. He was so still with his eyes still wide but not filled with tears which were starting to spill over. Though he didn’t frown or yell it was just so accusing the way his eyes stared into Marco’s. Marco ducked his head, he couldn’t meet Kurt’s gaze any longer. He had dreamed about kissing Kurt for a year but now that it had actually happened the feelings og elation he thought he’d have weren’t there. Marco felt sick.
Kurt suddenly turned and ran, as bad as Marco felt he couldn’t let all of this go to nothing. He had to give Trixie and Jayden enough time to carry out their phase of the plan! So Marco ran after Kurt. Kurt didn’t leave the building like Marco had expected; instead he dashed into the men’s bathroom. Marco chased after the countertenor only to stop when he heard the sounds of Kurt throwing up in one of the stalls. Marco knew he couldn’t do this anymore. He had to stop. “I’m sorry, Kurt,” Marco murmured outside Kurt’s stall before exiting the bathroom. To hell with the rest of the plan, there shouldn’t have even been one in the first place.
Kurt wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. His mind was still racing as he flushed the toilet and exited the stall. He headed over to the sink and stared at his reflection. He looked terrible. His hair was a mess and he still had traces of vomit left on his chin. He looked bad but he felt so much worse. Kurt felt used and disgusting. How could he even look Blaine in the eye after this?! Kurt sank into the ground and brought his knees to his chest.
“We have the pictures, let’s move,” Trixie almost dragged Jayden over to the photocopying room.
Jayden wasn’t sure why he was feeling like this. He hated Kurt, so why was he feeling so angry when he saw Marco kiss him. He wanted to spring in between the two of them and not let either of their lips touch each other. It wasn’t Kurt he felt protective of, however, it was Marco. He didn’t want to see Marco kiss anyone.
Jayden was in a trance while he watched Trixie fiddle with the equipment. She made a couple of comments about his lack of input but Jayden barely registered them.
When Trixie finished getting the photos off the computer she selected the best ones herself before printing them off.
“Here, it seems I’ve had to do all this myself so the least you can do is make sure Blaine gets them! You didn’t even take any pictures. We are going to talk about this when you get back. Now, move!” Trixie gave him a push in the direction of the exit. Jayden didn’t really any option but to follow her instructions.
Jayden walked through the town to Blaine’s apartment still slightly out of it. He tried not to think about what he was doing and instead just concentrated on putting one foot in front of the other repeatedly. Jayden clutched the pictures to his chest as if his life depended on it yet he never once glanced over them, even if it was just to check he was even holding the right pictures!
Jayden arrived at Blaine’s apartment just fifteen minutes later. He dreaded telling Blaine. Blaine was pretty angry when Jayden had tried to get information out of him so he hated the idea of being the one to show him these pictures. Jayden just hoped this would work because they had nothing if it didn’t. They had no back-up plan and both Kurt and Blaine would definitely hate all three of them!
Jayden nearly bumped into Blaine just outside the apartment. “Hey Jayden,” Blaine said stiffly, “I don’t suppose you know where Kurt is. He said he’d be here as soon as you guys finished.”
“Blaine,” Jayden improvised, “I think Kurt’s with Marco at the moment. In fact I think he will be spending the evening with Marco.”
“What are you talking about?” Blaine asked suspicion beginning to show on his face.
Jayden, thinking that he was doing well continued, “Look, I hate to break it to you Blaine but I think Kurt like Marco. In fact, I’m pretty sure they are dating.”
Blaine’s eyebrows furrowed, “I don’t believe you.”
Jayden handed over the photographs, “I didn’t think you’d believe me so I took these when they weren’t looking. I know we haven’t been the best of friends recently but I’m happy to help you through this. I think you need to break-up with Kurt.” Jayden tried to look reassuring.
Blaine’s face went from angry to thunderous. He grabbed Jayden by his shirt collar, “now I know Kurt wouldn’t do this. I will never make the same mistake twice. Kurt is an honest and good person who would never cheat, so you’d better get explained how these photos came about or I’ll have to go explain to your girlfriend how your nose got broken. Do you understand me?”
Jayden nodded furiously and was immediately released, “tell me what happened and don’t even think about bull-shitting me.”
“I’m sorry, Blaine,” Jayden said, “I’m so sorry.”
“Just tell me where Kurt is,” Blaine was nearly begging now. He knew how badly this would affect Kurt; he needed to get to his boyfriend quickly to re-assure him. He needed to be the person he wasn’t five years ago.
“I don’t know, honestly me and Trixie had to go off to print the photos! Marco was going to stay with him,” Jayden explained.
“How could you leave Kurt alone with the guy who just forced him into a kiss?! What if something worse happened!? I’m going to go and find him but we will talk about this,” with that Blaine ran off to the theatre. He was pretty sure that there wasn’t anything wore going on but he had to be sure and he had to be there for Kurt. If this was anything like last time Kurt was going to be pretty broken over it and Blaine needed to help him get better.
A walk that nearly took twenty minutes to complete took Blaine ten. He was completely out of breath by the time he arrived at the theatre but he knew he had to push forward. So Blaine ignored the pains in his chest and the screams of his muscles as he dashed through the corridors of the building. He called out Kurt’s name at every interval but there was never a response. Blaine was just about to head back to the apartment and see if Kurt had one there when he heard a small whimper coming from the men’s bathroom. Tentatively Blaine walked over to the source of the sound.
“Kurt?” he called softly as he walked into the large tiled room, “are you in here?”
Blaine looked around the room before he finally located his boyfriend. The sight of Kurt broke his heart. The countertenor had his back against the wall and his knees drawn into his chest. He was omitting broken sobs at regular intervals. Kurt’s hair was a mess, usually he had not a single hair out of place but this time it was the opposite. Blaine slowly approached Kurt; he didn’t want to startle him and sat down next to him.
After a few moments Blaine carefully placed an arm around Kurt’s small shoulders, he jumped at first, wary of contact, before melting into Blaine’s touch. Blaine drew Kurt into his chest and Kurt sobbed into the soft material of Blaine’s jumper.
“I’m… so… s-sorry,” Kurt whispered in between sobs and his words made Blaine want to punch Marco in the face. Instead Blaine held Kurt closer and kissed the top of his head.
“Hey, shhh, it’s ok. It wasn’t your fault you didn’t want it,” Blaine murmured into Kurt’s hair, which was still just as soft as ever despite all the drama.
“So… you’re not... mad?” Kurt asked, looking up to meet Blaine’s eyes. Blaine wanted to hold Kurt forever and never let him go at the sight.
“I’m very mad indeed,” Blaine whispered and he felt Kurt stiffen, “but I’m not mad at you, you silly goose. I’m mad at Marco for making you so sad. I love you just as much Kurt, nothing is going to change that.”
“So you don’t think I’m… dirty or… disgusting?” Kurt asked leaning his head, once again, against Blaine’s chest.
Blaine felt terrible for Kurt. How could someone make him feel like that? Kurt was perfect to Blaine. “I think you are the most amazing, beautiful and strongest person I ever met, Kurt. I love you and I always will. You are incredible and not amount of unwanted kisses is going to change that. You’re still Kurt and you’re still the love of my life,” Blaine said firmly, not allowing any arguments from the man, who now felt like a small boy again, in his arms.
“But… don’t you want to break-up with me?” Kurt asked, shyly. He was dreading the answer though he needn’t have.
“Never, Kurt, I will never break-up with you,” Blaine said.
They stayed like that for a while. Kurt was wrapped in Blaine’s soft, yet strong, arms. Sometimes Kurt would let out a cry and Blaine would rub soothing circles into his back.
“I’m sorry I spoiled our date,” Kurt whispered.
“You haven’t spoiled anything. Anyway, the date was really just watching Disney films. You’ve seemed really tried recently so I figured a Disney marathon might be more appreciated than any amazing date on a helicopter or something equally romantic. Though, if that’s what you want there’s still time?” Blaine sighed.
“No, I like the idea of a bit of Disney. Can we go back to your place?” Kurt asked meekly.
“Sure thing, Kurt, let me help you up,” Blaine smiled a carefully stood up while still holding Kurt, bringing Kurt to his feet at the same time.
The two walked in silence back to Blaine’s apartment. Though Blaine had to let Kurt go mostly he still held on o Kurt’s hand and would give it a gentle squeeze every now and then to remind Kurt that he would still be here for him.
When they got back Blaine carefully directed Kurt to the sofa with a hand on the small of Kurt’s back. “You sit here and I will go and get us some coffee, then we can watch The Little Mermaid. Ok?” Blaine asked, gently stroking Kurt’s hair away from his face. Kurt gave him a small smile and nodded, Blaine smiled back before exiting the room.
Their evening was a quiet one. Usually while watching a film they would discuss the character’s actions or how well the actor or actress was playing the part. Only this time they just huddled up together and about half-way through Kurt rested his head on Blaine’s lap; Blaine spent the rest of the evening stroking his boyfriend’s perfect hair and every now and then placing a kiss of Kurt’s forehead or cheek. He never tried to kiss Kurt on the lips because he didn’t want to remind Kurt of the kiss from earlier.
When the film ended neither of them made a move to change the DVD. They stayed together on the sofa watching the company logo moving round the screen.
“Blaine?” Kurt whispered.
“Yes, Kurt?”
“I don’t know what I’m going to do. We have to perform tomorrow. I don’t know how to act on stage… we have to sing As Long As You’re Mine together. I can’t do it Blaine,” Kurt whispered and Blaine noticed his eyes filling up once more.
“If you want you can always think of it as me you’re singing it with,” Blaine whispered.
“But I’ve never sung it with you before,” Kurt murmured back.
“Then sing it with me now,” Blain whispered right into Kurt’s ear, before getting up. He quickly walked over to his laptop and soon the introduction to As Long As You’re Mine was playing.
Kiss me too fiercely
Hold me too tight
I need help believing
You're with me tonight
My wildest dreamings
Could not foresee
Lying beside you
With you wanting me
Kurt started tentatively at first, but he had sung this song so many times before that he knew it inside out. When he sang it, though, this time he wasn’t pretending to be a witch in the land of Oz, this time he was Kurt Hummel singing to his amazing boyfriend who loved him despite everything.
And just for this moment
As long as you're mine
I've lost all resistance
And crossed some borderline
And if it turns out
It's over too fast
I'll make ev'ry last moment last
As long as you're mine
Kurt finished his solo delicately pressing a loving kiss on to Blaine’s cheek.
Maybe I'm brainless
Maybe I'm wise
But you've got me seeing
Through different eyes
Somehow I've fallen
Under your spell
And somehow I'm feeling
It's "up" that I fell
Blaine sang strongly, he looked into Kurt’s eyes at every opportunity because he wanted Kurt to believe that he wasn’t just doing this as a vocal exercise; he was telling Kurt something.
Every moment
As long as you're mine
I'll wake up my body
And make up for lost time
Their voices joined together in perfect harmony.
Say there's no future
For us as a pair
Blaine held Kurt’s face gently between his hands while he sung his final solo. This song fit a lot better than he’d originally thought. In fact, it was perfect.
And though I may know
I don't care!
Just for this moment
As long as you're mine
Come be how you want to
And see how bright we shine
Borrow the moonlight
Until it is through
And know I'll be here holding you
As long as you're mine
Blaine held Kurt in his arms at the end of the song. Kurt pressed a very chaste kiss onto his lips. Though it was nowhere near as passionate as many of their other kisses it seemed to convey so much more.