Chapter 2: Reunion

"Kurt…" Blaine stared shocked.

But Kurt was happy. Blaine's brain refused to merge the two Kurts together. First there was happy Kurt; he played his favourite role in his favourite musical and had a smile that looked like sunshine was emitting from his face (even though said face was green at the time). The second Kurt's face was also green; though the green was smudging through what looked like a waterfall of tears; the second Kurt looked so fragile, so sad; it was almost unbearable to watch.

Kurt stared right back at Blaine for a few moments before shuffling slightly as if about to move away back inside.

"Don't go." Blaine's word gushed out before he could stop them. Kurt paused and looked up at him questioningly. Blaine couldn't take it any longer, he just wanted to see Kurt happy again; he quickly bridged the gap between himself and Kurt until he was sitting on the wall right next to him.

Blaine put his arm around Kurt. At first Kurt stiffened, but then one tiny sob escaped his stiff upper lip and he fell against Blaine's warm chest. Kurt cried into Blaine's shoulder. Blaine gasped internally unsure what to do. He thought back to the times when they were a couple, Kurt had often been under stress then, he would often cry just like this; Blaine remembered what had always made Kurt feel better and he extended his free arm to the small of Kurt's back and he gently held him.

It was a good five minutes before the tears seemed to subside slightly. Then the reality of the situation seemed to dawn on Kurt. Blaine felt him suddenly stiffen in his arms before pulling away from Blaine.

"W-what are you doing here?" Kurt hissed. Though he stuttered slightly Blaine could easily here the bitterness in his voice. Immediately Blaine felt stupid. What was he doing here? He knew he shouldn't have come he was only causing more pain. But it was too late now. He couldn't change the past.

"I came here with a… err… friend. Honestly I just came to here to see the show I didn't know…. Well I did but that's not why I came… It was even my idea honestly Kurt."

Kurt raised an eyebrow at the word "friend". He made no attempt to say anything on the subject, however. So Blaine began to speak again.

"Kurt, I don't get it. You were so happy what happened to you?"

"You happened Blaine. Granted this particular episode can't be put down entirely to you but you set me up to fail. Do you know what you put me through? What you still put me through every day. I will never be as confident as I once was, and that is your fault."

Through the whole speech Kurt never raised his voice once. It sounded almost rehearsed as though Kurt had known this would always be what he would say to Blaine if he chose to try to come back into Kurt's life. Blaine just stared open mouthed.

"I… I never thought… I never thought we were that close. I'd thought you'd have found someone else by now."

"You think I'm upset because I want you back?" Kurt's voice went up in pitch, "Blaine, I suffered because of what you accused me of… because of the names you called me. Do you know how long I spent trying to work out what I could possibly have done that was so wrong. To have deserved the treatment you gave me? It took me years, Blaine, to realise that the reason I couldn't work it out was because I had done nothing wrong. I had nothing to hide. And you wanna know the worst part Blaine?"

Blaine didn't want to know the answer he had tears streaming down his face. He wished he'd never come to Paris he wanted run and forget everything. He wanted to erase Kurt from his memories permanently. He wanted to run, right now, and not give Kurt a backward glance, and maybe that made him sound horrible, a monster, but Blaine couldn't help it. He didn't have a clue what kept him sitting on that wall next to Kurt. Was it shock? Horror? Or something else? Blaine didn't have a clue; all he knew was that he would be sitting here until Kurt had said everything he wanted to say.

After a pause Kurt continued, his voice a little less heated now, he sounded sad, scared even. "The worst part is, Blaine, not just that I blamed myself; but I'm still not over it and I'm not sure if I ever will be. You were my first true love and you crushed me. You were worse than the bullies and haters; I expected it from them… but you… you always promised never to hurt me… and I believed you. You know how hard it is for me to trust anyone now after the way you left me."

Blaine just stared at Kurt. He'd felt regret before. He'd felt regret often; he just never thought the emotion could be felt so strongly. All he could think about was how much he wanted to go back and change everything that happened. He wanted to put things right… he just didn't know how.

"Kurt… I… I'm so sorry… I never knew."

"No, you didn't, but you should have done." With that Kurt started to move. He wiped away the last of his tears and got up off the wall.

"Kurt please wait! Please let's talk. I've missed you! I want to help!"

"Just leave it Blaine. As you can probably tell I have enough problems in my life right now without you adding to them."

"Kurt… please!"

"Bye Blaine."

And with that Kurt turned on his heel and walked off. Blaine stared after him. He wanted desperately to follow, but he couldn't remember how to move his legs. He spent a while just staring at the empty air which had been previously filled by Kurt's warm body.

Blaine cried. He couldn't help it the tears would not stop falling.

Blaine had no idea how long he had been there all he knew was that the sky was lot lighter than it had been when he had left Jayden… Jayden!

Oh Shit!

Blaine whipped out is phone and almost broke the keys in an attempt to switch it on as quickly as possible. Not that a few seconds would make much difference when he hadn't contacted Jayden in what must be well over an hour.

56 missed calls from the above caller

Blaine stabbed the "return call" button. The call was answered on this first ring.

"Blaine! Ohmygod! Where have you been? I've been worried sick I thought you'd been mugged or something! Oh thank God you're alright! I was just about to call the police… hang on… where have you been, Blaine? How could you do that to me?"

"I'm so sorry Jayden! I just went for a walk and I got totally lost then I was trying to find my way back. I forgot my phone was off. Where are you now I'll come find you?"

"I'm just outside the theatre… where you said you'd wait for me? You weren't speaking to Kurt were you? See I heard one of the actors complaining that they couldn't find him either."

"N…no of course not!" Blaine knew the lie was weak but he also knew Jayden wouldn't understand; he'd only assume the worst.

The two met up in a matter of minutes. They went off to get the early train together to get back to London.

The two didn't talk on the way to the station. They didn't hold hands like they normally would. Blaine got that Jayden was angry but he never thought he would be like this… Jayden didn't know about his rendezvous with Kurt. At least Blaine thought he hadn't seen anyone else there.

"So, Blaine, how did your walk go?" Jayden's voice was icy and heavily sarcastic. Blaine didn't know what to say in response to Jayden, so he answered the literal question.

"Fine thanks! I mean it was great until I realised I'd gotten lost!" Blaine smiled; a heavy strained smile.

"So you definitely didn't go to see Kurt then?"

"What do you mean? Like I said of course not!"

"You see Blaine I may be a very trusting person, but I'm not stupid. You have green stage make-up all over you shirt. Now I wonder where that came from."

Blaine sighed. He didn't know what to say.

"Yeah, ok, I admit it. I was outside and I heard crying. It was Kurt. I went over and comforted him a bit and held him. We didn't talk much and we have no plans to see each other again. I just didn't want you to think I was seeing anyone behind your back. It was honestly nothing."

Jayden sighed, "I'd rather know Blaine. I would have believed you. Please don't lie to me again."

"Ok, I'm sorry. I should have told you. I will always tell you things in the future. I promise."

Jayden held Blaine's hand. The argument was over. Blaine would probably never see Kurt again. That was the end of the matter.

Only it wasn't. Ever since Blaine had had to see Kurt devastated face he couldn't get it out of his head. The guilt he felt was huge. When he was alone he would spend hours crying. How could he have just left Kurt in Paris? Kurt was so unhappy and maybe right now Blaine wasn't the person he wanted but Kurt needed a friend. He just seemed so lonely.

Blaine watched videos of Kurt performing on YouTube, but the more he saw the smiling face at the end of the performance the more he could pick out which showed the smile to be false. Kurt's cheeks weren't bending in the right way and his eyes, though glittering, seemed deep and sad.

How could I have possibly been fooled by this show smile?

When Blaine was in public he didn't talk much. He was irritable and nothing was ever quite right. A lot of people commented that he was mopey. This just annoyed Blaine even more. Some even gave him pitying glances or described him as sad. This upset Blaine. How can they pity him and call him sad when Kurt was in the depths of misery? And it was all his fault!

The whole experience was like losing Kurt all over again. He just like nothing would ever make him smile again.

Jayden tried to be understanding at first. He would bring Blaine tubs of Ben and Jerry's to eat in bed, he wouldn't pass comments on Blaine's behaviour and he would not demand a reason for the sudden change of mood.

Blaine would get through his performances ok. He would imitate Kurt's perfect fake show smile which only upset him more, thinking how sad Kurt must feel too when Kurt would be making the same face.

After a couple of weeks things got better, and worse. They got better because Blaine would venture out of the house more; he would talk a little more and would start to take a slight interest in his appearance. But all these things started to get lost on Jayden who was still very much aware of how different Blaine was acting. Jayden started to get fed up. He would be a little harsher on Blaine and in return Blaine would only be even more moody back. Things went round in a vicious circle and it became clear that things were coming to a head.

It all came out one night just after a performance. Since it was their day off the next day Jayden was asking Blaine if he would want to come out with Jayden. To go see a movie and have dinner in a restaurant.

"I know your upset Blaine but I think if we go back to doing things like this it will help you," Jayden pointed out.

"I know you want to help but right now I just don't feel like going out. Please be patient with me," Blaine sighed.

"I have been extremely patient and understanding of what you're going through, Blaine. I haven't asked any questions, I haven't made comments and I have stuck with you even though I know why you're upset and it's not an easy thing to deal with. So all I'm asking is that you try to get better even half as hard as I have been trying to help you."

"I have been trying Jayden. Do you have any idea of just how hard this is for me? I have been better recently and I want to start going out with you again but right now it just doesn't feel right."

"Why, because the boy who broke your heart came back into your life for a couple of hours? You don't need him. I can be enough for you Blaine, I'm good to you. You don't need someone who seems clearly more focussed on destroying you than anything else."

"Don't say things like that! None of this is Kurt's fault, it's mine! Just leave him out of this!"

"I would leave him out of this if it weren't for the fact it has everything to do with him! And maybe I would understand a little more if you would actually tell me what's going on."

"Just drop it Jayden! I'm sorry alright! I do like you it's just that Kurt was really upset when I saw him and I feel like it's my fault. I really don't want to say any more because now I just want to move on, honestly."

Jayden sighed and closed his eyes for a few seconds. When he got together with Blaine he had always been a little jumpy. If anything at all didn't go quite as planned Blaine would be overly apologetic. Jayden he just thought that was the way he was. Now, however, he realised there might be something more to it than that. He wanted desperately to think that whatever happened had been Kurt's fault but somehow the way Blaine talked about it seemed to show otherwise.

"Yeah, ok Blaine. I'll give you a little longer. I just want things to go back to the way they were before."

"I do too," Blaine said but he didn't know to whom he was referring to. He wanted to be with Jayden, he liked Jayden. But somehow he just couldn't shake off the feeling that he was making a terrible mistake by staying away from Kurt. Their relationship had been so loving and wholesome, and then he put his foot in it and ruined the whole thing. Only it wasn't just the relationship he had killed. He had killed a part of Kurt. He had killed Kurt's trusting nature and open heart. He had caused so much pain.

Blaine walked off at that point. He needed some air. What was he going to do? There was only one person he wanted to see right now and that person was in Paris. Blaine walked dejectedly along the streets, not really paying much attention to those who walked passed him or to the shops he passed.

He had a full day off tomorrow and he had no idea what he was going to fill it with. If he did go somewhere he was sure to be wasting his time as he probably wouldn't enjoy it, but if he didn't then he would only be stuck in his apartment thinking about Kurt. That would do him no good.

Then for the first time Blaine took metal not of his surroundings. He was by travel agents which had a large poster of the Eiffel Tower in the window: "Day Return to Paris for only �59!" Blaine had never believed in fate before now. He didn't like the idea that your life was already mapped out before you were even born. But this, this was different. There had to be some reasoning, someone up there wanted Blaine to make things ok with Kurt. And he was not about to let this opportunity pass him by. Blaine marched into the travel agents, credit card already out, and went to buy his train tickets.

The next day Blaine had told Jayden he was off to visit family and soon found himself speeding along the tracks on a high speed train. This was it; he would see Kurt, he would make it better and then Kurt would be able to smile again.

Blaine couldn't stop himself from smiling. He knew he shouldn't be like this. After all Kurt was still going to be pretty mad at him. If anything more so since Blaine was refusing to let him go.

However for the first time in what felt like many weeks, though in reality it can't have been more than two, Blaine felt truly happy. He was going to see Kurt again.

Upon arrival in Paris Blaine didn't want to do anything stupid like sightseeing or going up the Eiffel Tower again. He'd done those things with Jayden; today all he wanted was to find Kurt's smiling face.

However, after about half an hour's walk it became apparent to Blaine that finding Kurt was easier said than done. On the train Blaine had thought that he would find them at the theatre rehearsing, but the theatre was locked up and there were no shows scheduled for tonight.

Blaine went around the town looking for Kurt. He went into every hotel he came across asking if Kurt was staying there but each time he was either told no, Kurt was not staying there or that the hotel staff were not at liberty to inform him on guests in the hotel without an appointment or confirmation from the said guest. In most cases he got the latter from the receptionists.

Blaine was at a dead end. He really wanted to see Kurt but it was getting ridiculous. Kurt could be anywhere, there was even a chance he was also taking an impromptu trip abroad as well. Blaine went looking around the streets desperately searching but always drawing a blank. Soon he noticed his empty stomach and decided to stop off at a small restaurant. Blaine chose the first thing he saw on the menu and ate his lunch without tasting it. All the time he was thinking of places Kurt might be. But each time Blaine drew a blank. It wasn't that there was a shortage of places, there were loads, it was just that Blaine only had one day to find him.

When Blaine left the restaurant he began looking round the museums. He ignored the art that hung on the walls and the sculptures and statues. He only had eyes for Kurt. And Kurt was nowhere to be seen.

After the museums he began searching all the clothes shops and fashion outlets. He would wait by the changing rooms to see who would come out, getting strange looks from the customers in the shops. He would ask at the till, giving them Kurt's description in the hope that they had seen him. Blaine even got chucked out of a couple of shops.

Blaine refused to give up as he darted in and out of cafes all over Paris. He checked everyone sitting in or outside of any caf� or restaurant. He even looked in Bakeries and grocery shops. He couldn't find Kurt anywhere.

As it drew up to his final hour in Paris Blaine became desperate. He would run up to people in the street asking them if they had seen Kurt. Some knew who Blaine was talking about and others Blaine would describe Kurt to them, trying and failing, to keep his description as unbiased as possible and not linger too much on his full lips and shining eyes as details.

Finally Blaine had to give up to the fact that he just needed more details to be able to find Kurt. He had always been able to accurately predict where Kurt was when they both lived in Lima but now the town was a lot bigger and after five years apart things were a lot harder.

Blaine caught the last possible train back. He cried on the train, silent tears rolled down his cheeks untouched. He couldn't face the fact that the Kurt's sobbing face would be the last expression he would ever see on Kurt. He would never see Kurt smile, or laugh or be a peace in a way that it only was when he was asleep.

When Blaine got back to London he bought an evening paper, he needed a distraction from all the upset he felt. He wanted closure today and all he had done was make it worse for himself.

Blaine got changed into his pyjamas, took out his paper and began to read in bed.

Blaine nearly had a heart attack when he read the headline in the entertainment section: "Revolutionary "Wicked" production comes to London". Blaine smiled.