Aug. 5, 2012, 8:01 p.m.
The Fallacy of Trust: Chapter 23
T - Words: 1,544 - Last Updated: Aug 05, 2012 Story: Complete - Chapters: 32/32 - Created: Mar 15, 2012 - Updated: Aug 05, 2012 1,676 0 4 0 1
“What do you think of this?” Maia asked, holding up a kitchen utensil set.
“I don’t know,” Blaine said for what felt like the thousandth time that day. His eyes skipped over various objects in the cooking store. It was hard not to be distracted. “She’s your mom.”
Maia sighed, tossing the package back down and moving on to look at pot holders. Blaine trailed slowly and reluctantly after her.
They’d gotten to the mall in the morning-not until eleven, though, due to an accident on the highway en route. Maia had spent the whole time they were sitting in traffic tapping her fingernails on her door, an endless tap-tap-tap-tap, which only added to the charged atmosphere between the two of them.
They’d arrived at the mall and looked through at least three stores before taking a break for food. Now they were slowly making their way through the inventory of a cooking store. Maia seemed determined that nothing was right for her mother’s birthday present.
Blaine listlessly observed a waffle iron demonstration while Maia looked at merchandise. He didn’t mind the mall so much usually, but today it was draining his energy.
Well, maybe Maia was guiltier of that than the mall was.
Maia eventually decided that nothing in the cooking store was right, either, so they left. Blaine reached for Maia’s hand as they walked along the stores in the mall, but she shook him off. “You’re walking too slow,” she complained.
Blaine was tired. He’d had trouble falling asleep the previous night after their date. He’d sat on his bed late at night, staring at his phone and debating whether he should call someone. The only two people he wanted to call were Maia and Kurt, and for some reason every time he considered talking to one of them he found reasons not to. It was late. He’d just seen Maia. He didn’t want to bother Kurt. Eventually he’d resorted to studying, which made him sleepy rather quickly. He wasn’t in the mood to be at the mall- not for hours on end, anyway.
Maia paused in front of a clothing store, looking at a coat displayed in the window. “What do you think of that?” she asked Blaine.
Blaine glanced at the coat on the manikin, hardly even noticing it. “It’s a nice coat.”
Maia rolled her eyes. “No, but for my mom.”
Blaine sighed. “Maia, I don’t know, okay? I’m sorry, but I don’t know what your mother wants or likes. You’re her daughter. Can’t you just choose something?”
Maia looked away from the window and faced him, crossing her arms. “Blaine, I thought you wanted to help. That’s why I brought you. You’re not being very helpful.”
Blaine took a step towards her. He didn’t feel well. He felt like he was about to make a mistake, but he carried on anyway. “Maia, I can’t help you with this, okay? I’m doing my best! I drove you here and I bought you lunch and I’ve gone with you into practically every store in the whole goddamned mall, what else do you want from me?!”
Maia looked at him in angered disbelief. “Oh, I don’t know, maybe I just want you to be supportive and caring! Isn’t that in the job description of a boyfriend?!”
Blaine scoffed. “Don’t tell me how to be a good boyfriend, Maia. I haven’t done anything wrong.”
“Shut up, Blaine.” Maia responded flippantly. “You’ve been ditching me constantly for the past two weeks. Don’t think I haven’t noticed.”
Blaine looked at her, confused. “What are you talking about? We hang out all the time!”
Maia rolled her eyes. “Yeah, when you’re not off having drunken sleepovers with your best friend Kurt.” She spit out Kurt’s name like it was a curse word.
“Maia, it wasn’t-“ Blaine stopped suddenly, staring at her. He narrowed his eyes, thinking. “How did you know I slept at Kurt’s?” Blaine asked slowly.
Maia crossed her arms, suddenly looking uncomfortable. “You told me,” she said simply.
Blaine shook his head slowly. “No, I didn’t.”
Maia met his gaze head-on. “Well you should have! Why are you keeping things from me, Blaine? What else haven’t you told me?”
Blaine could hear the hurt in her voice, but he was too preoccupied to acknowledge it. “Maia, how did you find out that I spent the night at Kurt’s?”
Maia looked down, her arms still crossed. She didn’t say anything at first, but Blaine refused to give in. Finally she began to speak. “After I called you on Thursday, I went over to your dorm to bring you coffee. Since you were hungover. I thought you’d like it.” She sighed, looking up again to face him. “But you weren’t there. So then…when you went to the bathroom in Breadstix, you left your phone on the table, so I just…checked it, okay? And you were talking to Kurt, thanking him again for letting you crash there…”
Blaine stared at his girlfriend incredulously. “You went through my phone?”
“I was worried about you,” she said quietly.
Blaine stepped back from her, running his hand over his face. “I can’t believe you,” he muttered. “That’s a complete violation of my privacy.”
“Blaine, you were lying to me!” Maia said angrily. “Why do you feel the need to lie to me?”
“Because you don’t understand!” he almost yelled back. He glanced around, remembering that they were in a mall and people were around. He quieted his voice before continuing. “I can tell you don’t like it when I hang out with Kurt. But Kurt’s my friend, Maia. He’s the closest friend I’ve had in a long time.”
Maia looked at him, her expression confused. “Blaine, you just met him.”
“That doesn’t matter. He just- he understands me, okay?”
“Whatever. It’s still not okay to lie to me.”
“It’s not okay to go through my phone!”
“I don’t want to lose you, Blaine!” Maia’s voice was raised and several nearby shoppers paused to look over her with alarm.
Blaine took a deep breath. “Come on,” he said. “Let’s go talk outside.”
He closed the space between himself and Maia, resting his hand on the small of her back to guide her. She resisted for a moment, but then gave in.
They walked outside and Blaine led them around the building to a more secluded spot, looking out over the parking lot. Blaine pulled away from her and sighed, taking a moment to look out over all the cars, the freeway in the distance, all those people driving and going somewhere and having lives of their own.
Finally, he faced Maia. “What do you mean, you don’t want to lose me?”
Maia crossed her arms over her chest. She looked suddenly very young, with a few strands of her dark hair falling loose from where she’d clipped it back and framing her face. Blaine resisted the urge to brush it behind her ear. “I feel like I’m losing you,” Maia said quietly. “Like you’re more distant, and you don’t want to spend time with me.” She swallowed, staring at the ground. “Our relationship isn’t like it used to be. It’s not as good, or easy. It’s like…your feelings have changed, or something.”
“Maia,” Blaine practically whispered. “No, Maia, I don’t- that’s not true.” Blaine swallowed hard. Was it true? He was so used to comforting and complying and just doing what made his life easiest- like telling Maia he still felt the same way- that he wasn’t sure if it was what he really wanted.
Maia looked up at him then. Her eyes were watery, and she bit her lip like she was trying to hold back tears. When she spoke her voice was shaky, but her tone was resolute. It reminded Blaine of how sure of herself Maia was, something he’d always admired in her. “Blaine, I think we need some time to think. Reevaluate what we have. Because clearly neither of us is sure.”
Blaine could feel a pain in his chest as he realized what she was saying. “No, no,” he pleaded. “Maia, that’s not what we need. We’re fine, okay? I’ll spend more time with you. I know I haven't been the best boyfriend lately, but I can be-“
“Blaine,” she said quietly, shaking her head. She’d made up her mind. “Just, a day, all right? Don’t talk to me tomorrow. Let’s think about whether this…we, are going to work out.” A tear slipped from her eye, and she wiped her eyes with her hand, then brushing back her out-of-place hair. Blaine watched her do these things, observing them, wanting to speak but unable to find air. It seemed as though his lungs were damaged along with his heart. Maia continued. “Look, I’ll take a bus home, okay? Thank you for driving me, but I think we should be apart, for now.” She took a deep breath and began to walk away.
Blaine finally found air, forcing words out of his mouth. “Maia, stop! Don’t go, okay, don’t leave.”
Maia paused, but didn’t turn around. She continued to walk.
“Maia!” Blaine called out, his voice breaking. “Maia, stay with me! Please! I- I love you!”
The world seemed to be still for a second, devoid of any sound or movement. Then Maia slowly turned around. She looked at Blaine, her eyes red and her jaw set, her expression unreadable. She opened her mouth to speak. “Blaine, don’t lie to me.”
She walked away, rounding the corner of the building and leaving Blaine all alone.
Comments
Good chapter. Not a downer for me...
Ohhh damn. Way to be a bitch, Blaine! Throwing out I love you during a fight, whatever. Love it, as always!
DRAMA! thanks for the bday update!
You're welcome! Happy birthday!