Feb. 12, 2012, 7:52 p.m.
It Just Wasn't Meant To Happen: Chapter 8
E - Words: 1,353 - Last Updated: Feb 12, 2012 Story: Complete - Chapters: 18/18 - Created: Jan 25, 2012 - Updated: Feb 12, 2012 2,026 0 6 0 0
When his eyes fluttered open for the first time in a week, Kurt was confused. The room was bright and white and seemed to scream at him – the bedsheets were too clean and it took him a while to realise one vital thing – this wasn't his room.
Slowly – slowly – other things began to come into focus – the way his stomach and head throbbed in perfect unison, the way his skin tingled, and finally, his memory started to float back.
Baby.
His hands flew to his stomach – the muscles already screaming after not being used for so long, and he encountered his almost flat stomach. Flat… Kurt couldn't….why was it flat? He…didn't he have a…
The truth dawned on him slowly – he began to piece together the vital information. Hospital, the pain, the flat stomach…
He'd lost him.
His mouth parted slowly, and tears built in his eyes as he stared at his stomach. He was gone. This…part of him, one he'd rejected and hated and had come to love and was so attached to was gone and he didn't even get to meet him. Didn't even get to say goodbye.
He tore his eyes away as the tears overflowed and he let out a sob, his eyes falling on the only other inhabitant in the room.
"Blaine." He choked out, unable to move.
His boyfriend was asleep – his head on his knees as he curled on the chair, which was far too small to be comfortable.
"Blaine." He managed louder, followed by another sob and suddenly Blaine was awake, his eyes snapping open and widening.
"Kurt. Oh my god…Kurt!" Blaine launched at him, stopping short and carefully climbing onto the bed to carefully wrap him into a hug.
Kurt could only cry, gently scrabbling at Blaine's back and sobbing into his shirt. Blaine held him close, pressing insistent little kisses all over his face, until Kurt realised that Blaine was crying too. It only made Kurt cry more – knowing that everything was true and they'd lost their baby.
Finally, after what seemed like hours of crying and hugging, Blaine pulled back, and Kurt was surprised to see the wide grin on his face, accepting another kiss from Blaine.
"I'm…I'm so glad you're awake." Blaine whispered, taking his hand and stroking it – needing the physical contact to remind him that Kurt was really awake and there and not unconscious anymore.
Kurt closed his eyes and more tears fell, making Blaine frown.
"Babe, are you okay?"
Kurt moved to sit up properly, but Blaine's firm hand on his shoulder stopped him completely, and he allowed himself to be pushed back down.
"I'm sorry." Kurt whispered.
Blaine raised an eyebrow, kissing the pad of Kurt's thumb gently. "What for?"
"Everything." His voice was almost inaudible, scratchy and pained from crying. "For not looking after him properly. For…for losing him."
Blaine blinked once – twice – before the news registered, and his face lit up.
"Oh Kurt. C'mere." Blaine pulled him gently into his arms, and Kurt burst into a fresh round of tears. "You didn't lose him."
Kurt shook his head. "I was the one carrying him. I should've-"
"Kurt." Blaine said firmly. "You didn't lose him."
Kurt frowned, and Blaine kissed him gently, wiping the stray tears from his cheeks. "What was the last thing you remember?"
Kurt swallowed hard. "I was at home…and then…" he shook his head. "Nothing. I don't remember anything…just…going for a nap…"
Blaine bit his lip – Kurt was missing a week and a half – almost two - from his life. It had been the worst week of Blaine's life – he had barely left the hospital – he'd been living off the canteen food and his neck and back ached from his sleeping positions, but there was no way he could leave Kurt's side. Not now. Not ever.
Burt and Carole had insisted he go home, but he always managed to sneak back in after they left. Every time he even thought about leaving Kurt and Hepsibah, tears sprang to his eyes. What if something happened to Kurt – what if he risked not being around for his final moments?
Kurt's life had been a ticking time-bomb for the past week – but the fact that he was awake…it ignited hope in Blaine's chest.
"Kurt…can you stay here for a little while…on your own…?"
Kurt's eyes filled with tears and he shook his head. "Please…please stay with me."
Blaine's heart broke a little – he could only imagine Kurt was feeling the same way Blaine had felt, watching Kurt die on the operating table.
But Kurt needed to see Hepsibah – he needed to see her or he wouldn't be okay.
Blaine made his decision and crawled into the bed next to Kurt, being extra careful not to jar him or jolt him or move him. He carefully wrapped his arms around Kurt and rested his lips against his temple.
"Try and get some sleep." Blaine said softly, and Kurt nodded, shifting only slightly as he snuggled into Blaine.
^.^
It took close to an hour – a lot of the time Kurt would burst into tears and cry – not convinced that his baby was okay. Blaine couldn't reassure him – he needed to see to believe, but Blaine soothed him, reminding him that he hadn't lost 'him'. Finally, Kurt was sleeping, and Blaine managed to sneak away.
He hurriedly made his way to paediatrics, where he found Hepsibah sleeping in her cot.
Scooping her up gently, he smiled as she settled herself easily into his arms. Waving at the nurse, he hurried back out of the room - Kurt probably wouldn't stay asleep for long.
"Come on Baby." Blaine whispered, still grinning. "It's time you met your other daddy properly."
Kurt was awake when Blaine walked through the door, hands anxiously fisted in his sheets. When he saw Blaine, he relaxed - then he spotted the baby.
"Blaine? Did you kidnap a baby?"
"No." Blaine laughed, walking back across the room to his chair.
"Then... who's she? She can't be our baby... Our baby was a boy... wasn't he?" Kurt asked in confusion, playing with the material of the sheets to distract himself from his urge to reach out and take her.
"Kurt, she's ours." Kurt shook his head slightly, not quite able to believe it. "Look at that Hepsibah, Daddy doesn't believe us." Blaine cooed softly, gently stroking the baby's face.
"...you named her without me?"
"No, Kurt, I - "
"You named her Hepsibah? I don't know which is worse!"
Blaine laughed again, leaning forward to kiss Kurt's cheek.
"Well, technically you named her..."
"No I didn't." Kurt denied. "I don't remember that at all." he added softly, frowning. Blaine saw his confusion, pulling out his phone and opening the picture he'd taken, handing it to Kurt.
Kurt's eyes softened.
"She's really mine?"
Blaine smiled gently.
"Why don't you see for yourself?"
Kurt bit his lip shyly, before holding his arms out. Blaine carefully placed her in his arms, and he sucked in a deep breath, swallowing hard.
"She's…she came from me?" He whispered, and Blaine nodded, watching them both fondly. "I didn't lose her."
Blaine smiled and perched himself on the end of the bed.
"Blaine…" Kurt asked softly, touching her face gently. "What happened?"
Blaine swallowed hard, his throat suddenly dry. "What?"
"I was out for a week…."
Blaine closed his eyes. "Please Kurt…not yet."
"What?"
"Just…ask later, okay. When you're out of the hospital…and better."
Kurt swallowed hard and nodded, fearing the worst. He busied himself with his little girl, trying to forget the stricken look on Blaine's face.
"She needs a name." Kurt said softly, playing with her little fingers. "Because Hepsibah is not suitable. Never listen to me when I'm dopey, okay?"
Blaine laughed, blinking back the tears that were threatening to overflow.
"I did try to change your mind." Blaine said softly, crawling up the bed to nestle at Kurt's side. "I suggested Rose."
"Rose is nice." Kurt agreed absently, lifting Baby up to kiss her forehead. "For a middle name." Blaine smiled, kissing at Kurt's temple, wrapping an arm around Kurt's shoulder.
Kurt leant into him absently, gently stroking the fine hair on Baby's head.
"I like Madeline. Madeline Rose."
"Madeline Rose Hummel-Anderson." Blaine repeated with a fond grin. "I like it."
Madeline gave a tiny gurgle, and Blaine and Kurt grinned at each other.
"I think she likes it too."
Comments
:) Lol ... Yaaaay!!Update soon!
awesome!
Cute chapter. I like the new name much better.
Oh gosh, I thought her name was going to be Hepsibah. Glad you changed it hahah.
I just really love this story! Hepsibah :')
Oh my goodness! How did you manage to write this? I can barely red it through the tears. What an emotional, heart-wrenching story!!!