Dec. 18, 2011, 3:05 p.m.
The Epic Love Affair
Ambassadors Abroad: Chapter 69 - London
E - Words: 4,703 - Last Updated: Dec 18, 2011 Story: Complete - Chapters: 73/73 - Created: Jul 28, 2011 - Updated: Dec 18, 2011 824 0 0 0 1
“Hey.” Kurt smiled lazily back at Blaine. “Sleep well?”
“Always do when I’m with you.” This caused a frown to appear on Kurt’s face. “Hey, why the sadness.”
“When we get home it will be back to being apart and then going to separate schools and only seeing each other a few times after school and on weekends.” Kurt frowned. “I want to be with you Blaine. I want this. I want to be able to wake up with you and see you whenever I want to see you.”
“Kurt, I promise you that we will figure this out.” Blaine was calm and a bit contemplative this morning. This wasn’t the first or second time for Kurt to mention this. Blaine was also concerned with the separation, but knew that they had the rest of the summer to figure it out.
“I’m sorry that I keep bringing it up, but I am really worried about…” Kurt trailed off trying to decide how to say it.
“Out with it Kurt. I know that there is something very specific you are worried about.”
“I’m worried that we won’t make it.” Kurt looked like he was already heartbroken, like it had already played out in his head. He held his breath trying to mask the pain that he was feeling in his heart at the thought of them not being together. “I feel like I am so attached to you right now, but what happens when we get back home and we don’t get this.. this time to be us.. to be alone and talk and share our dreams.” Kurt’s eyes filled with tears that were begging to escape but he swallowed them back with each breath. “What if we grow apart because our lives are so separated by distance, schools, friends?”
Blaine finally understood what was eating at Kurt. This was it. Blaine finally broke through that barrier that Kurt held up. The barrier that had always kept Kurt safe from ever being hurt. The barrier that he always held up until the attack changed it. The attack did so much for Kurt and he didn’t even know it. It gave him strength to speak up and say what he wanted people to hear. Blaine was thankful that Kurt said it, because he never thought about it. Blaine just assumed that things would be perfect forever. No questions. But this was something that Kurt thought about and didn’t take lightly. “Kurt, we have managed to stay together after you transferred. We did it and look at us today.”
Kurt contemplated the rest. “Blaine. There’s more to it.” Kurt couldn’t meet Blaine’s eyes. “We’ve changed. This trip and everything that has happened changed us. I feel so much differently about you than I did before the trip. I loved you before, but now…” Kurt let the tears spill as he tried to take deep breaths to cover up all the pain he was harboring in his body. “Now, I feel like.. like.. “ He couldn’t finish.
Blaine looked at him with question. “I don’t understand Kurt. You need to tell me so that I understand.”
“I can’t breathe without you.” Kurt let out a deep sigh. “I can’t.. I just can’t imagine being without you day after day. I can’t even consider the thought of not being able to smile at you, look at you, see your eyes, kiss you and hold your hand when I want to. It’s not me being needy, Blaine. I know that I can be, it’s more than that.” Kurt turned away from Blaine. “I don’t understand this feeling in my chest. It hurts so much when I think about not being able to be with you every day.” Kurt moved to get out of bed and walked quickly to the bathroom. He couldn’t stand it. He shut the door and locked it.
Blaine tried to run after him, but he was so shocked that the reaction Kurt had was so quick and decisive. “Kurt, please open the door.”
Kurt was vomiting into the toilet. There wasn’t anything to vomit since he hadn’t eaten, yet he gagged and vomited the acrid bile that coated his stomach. Kurt was dry heaving, and choking and panicking. That’s what he had been reduced to. He could hear Blaine pounding on the door begging for entry, but he just couldn’t tear himself away from the toilet to let him in. Kurt was still on his knees full on panic attack now and felt dizzy. “Blaine! I can’t.. I can’t breathe. Blaine! Sorry.. Help…” From outside the door Blaine could hear Kurt fall to the ground.
Blaine was crying. He couldn’t get in the fucking door. What the hell are hotel doors made of. He called the front desk and demanded immediate attention yelling out what had happened. “Kurt! Dammit, please open this door. Kurt! Can you hear me?” Blaine opened the door to find Finn headed this way.
“Blaine. What’s going on?” Finn grabbed Blaine by the shoulders.
“It’s Kurt. He was..Crap, I’ll explain later. Just find a cleaning lady for a key or something. We need to get into the bathroom. Kurt locked himself in there.” All the yelling brought everyone into the hallway. Finn just shushed everyone with the wave of a hand. Finn and Blaine returned to the door.
“Kurt. It’s Finn. Can you hear me? Kurt, open up.”
“Finn. It’s useless, I think he passed out. We need the key to the door. Or just something to poke this.” Blaine was pointing at the doorknob completely flustered. He was pacing back and forth with every second. “Where the hell is Puck when you need him?”
“Is someone speaking my name in vain?”
“Puck, tell me you have something to open this.” Blaine’s look could break someone’s heart. He looked like someone died.
Puck reached for his pocket knife. And popped the lock on the other side. “Got it. And you all wonder why I never leave home without this thing.” Blaine pushed Puck aside and ran into the bathroom. Kurt was laying on the floor eyes shut next to the toilet.
“Kurt. Baby, look at me!” Blaine’s tear stained face was desperate for Kurt to open his eyes. “PLEASE!”
Mr. Shue entered the room. “What the heck is going on here guys? Blaine, what happened?” He saw Kurt passed out on the floor. “ Do we need to get emergency help on the phone?”
“Blaine..” Kurt was weak as he cracked his eyes open and saw Blaine. Blaine picked him up and carried him to the bed.
“Kurt. You scared me.” Blaine pushed that piece of hair off of Kurt’s forehead. The one that he loved so much. “Look at me. Are you okay?”
“Yeah. I’m sorry.” Kurt looked to see Finn, Puck, Mr. Shue, Rachel and Mr. Royce hovering over him. “I’m sorry everyone. Just a mental crisis.”
Mr. Shue was not convinced it would be okay. “Kurt, do you need to go to the hospital?”
“No.. really.. This was just me being Kurt the over reactor again. I just need to talk to Blaine and we will get ready. I’ll be fine.”
Finn urged everyone to leave them alone. “We’ll see you guys in about an hour right?”
“Yes Finn. I promise. Sorry for being such a basket case of a brother.”
Finn shook his head. “No man. I love you.”
“Thanks Finn. I love you too.” The door shut.
Blaine still sat hunched over Kurt and tears spilled over running down his cheeks. “Kurt. You can’t do that stuff. You just… you just can’t. Do you have any idea how scared I get. I felt like I could lose you at any moment. I thought you died. Hit your head, broke you neck and died.”
“I’m fine and I’m sorry for overreacting.” Kurt laughed a little at the reaction Blaine had and tried to brush the tears away only to have his hands pushed away.
“No Kurt. It’s not okay. What happens to me if you die?” Blaine’s question was met with silence. “Kurt. I’m going to say this once and you are going to listen and you have to trust me. Okay?” Kurt nodded. Blaine looked so broken in this moment. “You have to believe me that I will figure this stuff out. I was serious when I proposed to you. You are my everything. I’m nothing without you. What happens to me if you leave me too soon? I can’t even stop to think about it for one second. When I heard you collapse behind that door… I-I thought I was going to die. I’m serious.. I am nothing without you. You make me everything I am Kurt. I am a better person with you. I achieve with you because you make me want to take the whole world on. I want everything to be better and I do all these things because of the support you give me, the drive you give me, and the love you give me.” Blaine paused taking Kurt’s hands. “Maybe it seems weak, but I know, that I would be less of a person if you weren’t with me.” Blaine continued to sit there and make eye contact. Kurt knew that there were no words for what he just heard but he understood that Blaine needed him just as much as Kurt needed Blaine. “So, do we understand each other?”
Kurt felt stupid for the way he reacted. He felt like a child. “I feel so stupid Blaine. I guess I didn’t understand…. Didn’t know..”
“But now?” Blaine urged Kurt to say what he needed to hear from his fianc�e.
“I didn’t know that you need me as much as I need you. I always thought that I needed you more.”
“Just remember. We are a team. I need you just as much as you need me. We are equal parts of a whole. It makes us who we are, Baby.” Kurt smiled because Blaine had finally called him Baby.
He launched himself into Blaine. “I love you so much. I love you. I love you Blaine.” He kissed Blaine hard and long.
They met everyone in the lobby and outside of Finn, no one made a sound about the morning mishap. “Hey Kurt. Are you okay now?”
“Yeah. Fine Finn. Just a panic attack earlier.” Kurt hugged Finn. “I just freaked out a little, but I’m getting better I think.”
“You need to stop overthinking things Bro.”
“Yeah, I know.” Blaine walked up behind Kurt and wrapped his arms around him. Kurt turned to look at Blaine. “Yeah.. I really do need to. Old habits are hard to break.”
“Hey Sweetheart. Miss me?” Blaine was much happier that he and Kurt had the conversation.
“In the last two minutes?” Kurt nodded his head. “I can honestly say yes.”
“You two are disgusting. I can’t stand how cute you guys can be.” Finn walked toward the rest of the group. They knew he didn’t mean it. “Come on you two.”
Ian gathered the group together. “It seems that we have until 4:00 for sightseeing. Your school has paid for a personal tour on one of the double decker busses. Because you have only a few days in London, it was chosen to do a bus tour of everything today and then tomorrow you will have time to explore the city at your leisure. There are a few places that we will stop and tour and a few places that we will be walking to. If I may suggest for tomorrow, since Buckingham Palace very close to the hotel, I think you should try to go to the changing of the guards. Today, we will stop at the Tower of London for a tour after we take a lunchtime river cruise.”
Ian paused to look at his clipboard at some notes. “I’m told that you like to sing during river cruises.” He crinkled his forehead because he thought that was a peculiar note. “So does that happen often?” Everyone looked at Blaine who put his innocent look on.
“I can’t help that I like to sing.”
Wes cut in. “You like to sing love songs to Kurt.” Blaine punched him. “Hey, I’m just trying to keep it real.”
“Okay, so I’m gathering that it is true. Well, you can sing on this one too since everything has been rented private for this group. Tomorrow, I was told, is your last day so I will be available to answer all your touring questions to make this last day worthwhile. I suggest that you jot down what you really want to see and I can let your know how to make it worthwhile. I will be at your concert tonight and dinner if you have questions.” Ian paused as the group got ready to leave. “Mr. Anderson. May I speak with you please?”
Kurt looked to Blaine to see if he wanted him to go with him. Blaine turned to him. “I’ll be right back okay? Trust me. It’s always for you.”
“I got your tickets Blaine. You seem to be a well known guy. Who are you?” Ian looked at Blaine questioning.
“Well, Stephan knows, so I might as well tell you. My Grandfather is half owner of an American Football Team and partner in the world’s largest law firm. Well, if that’s not impressive enough, my dad is also partner in one of the largest litigation firms in the US. I’m just Blaine, son and grandson.”
“Just?” Ian laughed. “What football team?”
“The Patriots.”
“THE New England Patriots?”
“Yeah, you know American Football?”
“Yeah. I went to college in the US.” Blaine looked at Ian questioning.
“Why are you a tour guide?”
“Taking some time off before working. My dad owns the tour company.”
“Oh.. That’s nice then.” Blaine thought. “Where did you go to school?”
“Harvard.”
“I see. Then you should be in good shape to take over the business.”
Ian eyed Blaine. “Why are you with Kurt? What I gather there, is that he comes from a broken family. His brother the tall guy is a stepbrother. I looked up McKinley High School. Not so fantastic. I was learning about Lima and it seems to be a very small town. Hummel Tires and Lube? Really Blaine? Aren’t you destined for better?”
“Ian. Thank you for getting the tickets, but you know absolutely nothing about me.”
“I know you have a completely different lifestyle than that fianc�e of yours. It usually doesn’t work, you know.”
“From your perspective, it would seem strange, but you have no idea how it was for me and for Kurt. I was a different person before him.” Blaine looked for Kurt in the crowd and couldn’t find him. He was standing on his tip toes trying to find him. He just wanted to see his eyes. He wanted the support that he would see in them. “Kurt made me this person. I mean, I was always the front man and charmer, but it was more out of duty or birthright. I am me today and I am comfortable in my skin. I can conquer the world with him at my side because he made me strong.”
“Kind of sappy. If you needed a first lady, there are plenty to choose from.”
“What’s your problem Ian?”
“I just see things. I just don’t get what the son of a mechanic does for you. Maybe he’s great in the sack. Good at blowing?”
“You’ve just overstepped your bounds Ian. You need to lay off immediately. Kurt is my fianc� and I love him. Maybe you are just jealous because you don’t have anyone, but that doesn’t give you the right to knock what we have. It would be more becoming of you to go sulk in a corner somewhere away from me.” Blaine turned and walked away. “You only wish you could find what I have. I would gladly tour London with Kurt alone if it wouldn’t hurt my friends, so for their sake I will stay on this tour. If you say anything to Kurt, I swear you will regret it.” Blaine’s eyes were black with venom. He was angry as he’d ever been.
Ian looked down in embarrassment. Blaine had it right. He was jealous. Ian wondered how powerful Blaine actually was.
Kurt came into view looking a little apprehensive about Blaine coming back to him. “Did you have a nice talk?”
“Not really.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Ian. He got to me.” Blaine shook his head in remorse for the words that came out of his mouth. “I bit back with venom.”
“How so Blaine?” Kurt took his hand and Blaine squeezed it tight. “What can I do for you Blaine? I want to make it better.”
“You can’t really do anything Kurt. He was just being a jerk. He’s jealous of us.”
“Did he? Does he .. Does he want you?”
“I don’t know. Maybe. Probably. Why else would he say the things he said?” Blaine was still angry.
“And what do you want?” Kurt was always terrified to ask that question, but he knew that he would not rest easy without seeing Blaine and hearing his answer.
“I think you know what I want, but I’ll say it anyway. There’s only you Kurt. I love you so much. This is exactly what Ian doesn’t get and never will. You could be here worrying about yourself, yet here you are supporting me even though I know inside, you are hurting.” Blaine was honest. “You are most definitely my better half Kurt.” Blaine kissed Kurt strongly, holding Kurt’s head in his hands through the entire kiss. When their lips parted, Blaine rested his forehead to Kurt’s taking in everything that Kurt gave. Blaine truly belonged to Kurt. He heard Kurt take a deep breath and he knew that he needed to look Kurt in the eyes to ease his pain. “You Kurt. You’re my everything Baby. I love you.” Kurt saw what he needed to see and that was it. Kurt let go of all that was I his head. He knew Blaine loved him and only him.
Kurt, Blaine, Finn and Rachel sat together to try to figure out what they wanted to do the next day. Kurt and Blaine especially wanted to maintain their distance from Ian. “Whatever we do tomorrow, I have plans for tomorrow night.” That’s when it hit him that Kurt would want to take Rachel and Finn to see the musical. He would have to talk to Ian in private again. How many times could he do this and hurt Kurt every time. “Kurt, I need to go talk to Ian one last time. Please stay in viewing distance from me. I need to be able to see you, okay?”
“I will Blaine.” Kurt understood where Ian stood on Blaine’s list and right now it was at the bottom. The only think Kurt could think that would make Blaine that angry with Ian was if he said something negative about him. Blaine was very territorial and very loyal to those he loved and he loved Kurt.
“Ian. I’m sorry to bother you once again. I would like to see if you can get me 2 additional tickets for the same balcony area that mine are in.”
“Why don’t you do it yourself? You know you can.”
“That’s not who I am. I will if I have to, but I choose to go the route of asking nicely and being polite. Something that you obviously missed.” Blaine threw daggers hard and aimed for the heart. “If you knew what manners were, you wouldn’t have insulted me or my fianc�e.”
“I think you took it wrong. I wasn’t trying to be rude to Kurt. I was trying to convey my interest in you. I just went about it the wrong way.”
“I appreciate your honesty, but I really am not interested in the least. Under the current circumstances, I am getting married to a fantastic person. One that I trust and one that trust me and cares about me.”
“I apologize for overstepping. And I will call right now to see what I can get for you.”
“I appreciate it.” Blaine turned quickly and walked to where Kurt stood with his beautiful smile and beautiful eyes.
“All set?” Kurt smiled gently at Blaine and took his hand. Blaine responded by pulling him close and kissing him right there in front of Ian. This ought to tell Ian who he belongs to as Blaine ran his hands over the swells of Kurt’s perfect ass.
The bus drove by Buckingham Palace. A group had now gathered around the power couple of Blaine and Kurt. The group that went last night said it was nice at night, but not much going on. They did rave about the pub they found and vowed to go back tonight after the concert. “That would be fun. We’ll definitely go tonight.” Kurt wanted to have fun with their friends before going home. It was all ending so soon.
“Blaine. Can I talk to you?” Ian again. Kurt was getting frustrated with the number of times Blaine needed to talk to Ian.
“Making plans Sweetie?” There was something implied in the words that escaped Kurt’s mouth.
“Yes. For us and hopefully, Finn and Rachel.” Blaine caressed Kurt’s face because the stress was showing. “You will love it. I think Rachel will too. Trust me.”
Blaine made his way to Ian, who was standing about 10 feet away. “I got them. All 4 will be at the ticket booth under will call.” Ian smirked. “You amaze me. I can’t believe you have to wine and dine him. He’s cute, yeah, but you. You could have anyone.”
“I have who I want. We were meant for each other. I wouldn’t have guessed it when I first met him, but I know better now.” Blaine looked at him with understanding. “Ian, I promise you, when you meet the right guy, you’ll know. With Kurt, something drew me to him, but I thought it was just friendship until it was more.”
Ian looked sad. “I just feel like I’ve met so few guys that I hit it off with and actually were attracted to. I just wanted a chance.”
“I understand. But respect me when I say, I can’t give you one.” Ian nodded and Blaine returned to Kurt.
“Did you get what you were looking for honey?” Kurt tried to not be jealous, but he knew he couldn’t hide it very well.
“I did and I think you are going to love me for it.”
“But I already love you.”
“You’ll love me more.”
Kurt took both of Blaine’s hands in his and kissed them and then wrapped them around his waist running his fingers into Blaine’s curls. “It’s not even possible. Kurt pulled Blaine back to the group.
Rachel looked up and smiled as she often did when it came to Kurt and Blaine. She was always so hopeful that they would be together a long time, like her dads. “You look happy.”
“We are.” Kurt was beaming and his eyes were so bright like ice.
“I have a surprise for Kurt and for you.”
Rachel was shocked but excited. “What is it Blaine. And why me?”
“Because you are Kurt’s best friend and because I need someone to hang out with.” Finn looked up.
“Dude, you got me something too?”
“Well it’s something that we are definitely doing together. Brothers, best friends and boyfriends.” Blaine knew Finn would most likely fall asleep during this and he wasn’t exactly a huge Broadway buff like Rachel and Kurt were, but he liked it well enough. “It’s tomorrow night, so until then, what are we doing?”
“Hyde Park is one of the largest of the Royal Parks of London and has been the location of many events in history. This group would probably find interest that it hosted Live 8 and other rock stars such as Queen and The Rolling Stones. Demonstrations have occurred here throughout history and the Great Exhibition of 1851 was held here. It is famous for Speaker’s Corner where you can speak about just about anything. Hyde Park houses the Serpentine River where Diana, Princess of Wales Memorial fountain is located. You’ll also find the Serpentine Bridge that crosses the expanse of the river and other landmarks from the Memorial for the London Bombing Victims, The Upside Down Tree, The Holocaust Memorial and the Marble Arch. You could spend an entire day walking the grounds of this park and the neighboring Kensington Park that eventually leads to Kensington Palace.” Everyone listened as Ian’s voice carried through the speakers explaining everything.
Next they came upon Madame Tussaud’s Wax Museum. Ian was going through a list of people, whose wax figures were housed there. Blaine turned to Kurt. “That’s sounds like fun too.” Kurt smiled and nodded. “Regent’s park is situated at the rear of the Museum….” Ian kept on.
“Blaine. What did Ian say about me?” Blaine looked like he was hit.
“How did you….”
“Because you wanted to be able to see me. You are the most loyal friend and boyfriend. I know he got you upset and I figured it was because he said something about me.” Kurt knew he figured it out just by Blaine’s reaction. “You don’t have to tell me. Especially if it will hurt my feelings. I don’t have the best track record when it comes to overreacting, hence what happened this morning.”
Blaine was quiet, just listening as the bus neared Bond Street and Oxford Circus. “He thinks you’re not good enough for me.”
Kurt shrugged. “Maybe I’m not, but maybe I got lucky.”
“Luck had nothing to do with it. I loved you first.” Blaine leaned his head over to Kurt’s neck smelling him and savoring the soft skin on Kurt’s neck. Blaine began nuzzling into Kurt’s neck, just enjoying the fact that he was allowed to do that and whenever he felt like it. “Your skin is so soft, Kurt. I just love the feel of it.”
Kurt put his arm around Blaine. “I’m so glad you picked me. Did Ian want you to pick him?”
Blaine could never lie. “First, let’s remember that I fell in love with you. No picking involved. Yes, he asked me to pick him, but I don’t even know him. He said we couldn’t make it because we are from different worlds. Then I set him straight.” Blaine hugged Kurt so tightly. “You will never have anything to worry about. You are so much classier than him.”
“Did you consider it?”
“No Kurt. He was rude and totally wrong about us and about you.” Blaine became irritated that Kurt continued to bring it up. “Please let it go. I hate him and I’m so tired of talking about him.”
Kurt agreed to let it go. The last thing he wanted to do was end the trip with an argument. The bus continued and the longer the ride went on the less the group was listening. There was so much to see and people were starting to make decisions. Blaine and Kurt decided that the changing of the guard would be on their list and Kurt they wanted to hit Trafalgar square. Finn Rachel, Wes, David, Nick, Jeff, Puck and Lauren decided to join them. Soon they were nearing Big Ben and Parliament and they heard Ian talk about going to the dock to get their lunch cruise down the river.