I start at myself in my long glass mirror.

Fat.

Gross.

Unwanted.

That's all I see. Well that my stupid baby, gay face, my thighs which are too close together for my liking, and mostly my jiggly disgusting stomach. I hear my it growl, No. The last time I ate was yesterday morning, when Blaine practically force fed me a piece of toast, saying 'Come on Kurt you look like you're about to faint, when was the last time you ate' To avoid answering I shoved the butter covered, carb infested junk into my mouth. So far I've lost about twelve pounds since last week but thats not good enough if I want Blaine to stay I need to speed up the process.

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ONE WEEK EARLIER.

I was preparing dinner for Blaine and I, he was suppose to be home from work any minute. Just as I was taking the lashiney out of the oven I heard the door open and Blaine call out.

"Honey, I'm home!" He said in the cheesy sixties movie way.

"You are so adorable it's almost hot" I replied as I walked over toward the door and pressed my lips to his. "How was work?"

"Oh it was fine, got to see a lot of talent." he said with a smile.

Blaine works at a recording company, after his love for music. With him wanting to have a family he couldn't go after his dream and move to LA, or try to get on Broadway, so he wants to try and make other peoples dreams come true for them.

"Well I spent the last hour and a half making a delicious dinner for you so come sit your booty down and eat" I stated. Then with a flirtatious smirk added, " And maybe you can have some diseart after".

"I think I would like that" he replied with wink.

We started eating and half way through I took another roll Blaine spoke. " Damn, you must be hungry." Completely joking. Ouch. That hurt, and I placed the roll back on the plate.

He could tell that I was upset and commented, "Oh honey, I was just kidding, I didn't mean it" he said.

"I know." I retorted, " I just realized I'm already getting full." I smiled and stood up to clear the table, also ending the conversation before it grew into something more.

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Now, a week later and the thought is still in the back of my brain. I needed to lose more weight. Blaine can't have a fat boyfriend, and if I don't he'll leave me for someone hotter and sexyer, someone with a lower voice, and not as annoying. I just have to change and then I will be perfect. I finally smile as I look at myself, 'skinner' is the last thought in my mind as I swallow two diet pills for the pharmacy down the street.