Kurt knew.

He knew right then that he wanted Blaine to be his first. And he wanted to be Blaine's first. But Blaine was right too. It was too soon for them to be getting so physical. They needed to get to know each other as boyfriends.

This thought brought Kurt back to the reason he had moved them into the back seat in the first place.

Their hands were intertwined on the seat, Blaine's fingers playing with Kurt's. Light touches that were so sweet Kurt felt like his world was complete. Kurt played the game for several more moments, and then raised his head to look at Blaine. Blaine was smiling and watching Kurt's fingers with that gorgeous face that he pulled when he was thinking about Kurt. It was a shame to have to speak, really.

"Tell me." Kurt whispered.

He didn't have to explain the question. Blaine knew what he was asking, and Kurt watched as he began to tense up and his fingers stilled their journey around Kurt's palm.

Without looking up, Blaine began to speak.

"I don't have a great relationship with my dad. Nothing like you have with Burt. When I told him I was gay I was twelve. I'd been beaten up at school for putting hairspray in my hair. I don't know why it was such a big deal, but to these kids, hair products equalled faggot."

Kurt inhaled sharply at the word. Blaine didn't use those words. Kurt knew some gay guys referred to themselves as fags merely to try to take the power out of the insult, but Kurt never had, and he had never heard Blaine use that word. He didn't use it with a sense of irony either. Kurt could hear the pain in his voice that came with speaking it. Kurt squeezed his hand, and he went on, still looking down.

"My dad told me it was my fault for using hairspray, and didn't I expect people to think I was a fag if I did those things?"

Kurt shook his head angrily, but stayed silent.

"So I said, in all my twelve year old innocence, that even if I was gay, what gave them the right to hit me? I wasn't hurting them." Blaine's voice cracked a little but seemed steady. "My dad just looked at me, Kurt; like he'd never seen me before. And we just sat there, and I felt guilty; like I was the one in trouble; like I'd done the punching."

Kurt felt like his heart was bleeding. He'd never imagined that confident, sure Blaine would have had this kind of coming out.

"My dad finally said something. I'll never forget what he said to me, Kurt. He said, "Blaine, are you a fag, son?""Blaine's voice was gruff as he absentmindedly copied his father's tone from years before.

Kurt made a noise of reproach in his throat.

"I just nodded. I sat there and nodded. Then Dad got up and walked out the front door, got in his car and left. I was in bed by the time he came home. But I wasn't asleep. I heard him come home at midnight and yell at Mum. Had she known? Then breakfast the next morning was fine. He didn't look me in the eye, but he was pleasant. Trouble was that I didn't ever want to tell him about anything. He would constantly ask me if I liked any of the girls in my class, and forever ignore the bruises I came home with."

Kurt couldn't deal with the distance between them anymore, and grabbed Blaine's hands and pulled him across the seat till he could hold him. They sat there hugging for a few moments before Blaine began talking again.

"It only really got bad when I…" He looked guiltily at Kurt. "This is about another guy. I don't want to hurt you…" Blaine's eyes were worried and Kurt couldn't help himself from kissing him, then. Just a chaste reassuring kiss, but Blaine's lips tried to cling to his, needily. Kurt didn't think he had the willpower to push him away when he was like this.

"Blaine," Kurt said gently, breaking away and shifting them so that Blaine's head was against his chest. "I know you have a past. I know that I'm not the first boy you've had feelings for. It's okay. I'm not going to get offended and leave you. I waited long enough for you to come around. I'm not going to throw us away over something that happened years ago."

Blaine nodded sensibly, "I know that. And it's really not a big deal. I just hate what I put you through on Valentine's Day, Kurt." He said softly and raised his head to look Kurt in the eyes.

Oh, Kurt wanted to kiss him right then. He knew that if he did, he wouldn't tell the story, and that was important, but it was all Kurt could do to stop himself from leaning down and claiming Blaine's lips right then.

Kurt settled for placing his palm over Blaine's cheek.

"Okay. When I was fifteen, I met James. He was different than all the other guys. He stood up for me when they called me a fag, and he played guitar too. They left him alone, for some reason, but he flirted with me like mad in private so I knew he was like me."

Blaine looked up at Kurt to make sure he wasn't upset, and then carried on.

"One day, James kissed me in an empty classroom. I kissed him back because I really liked him. But before it got very heated, one of the guys who loved beating me up walked in."

Kurt breathed in sharply, having a horrible premonition about where this was headed.

"And James pushed me away and started screaming about how the faggot had tried to kiss him, and how I'd jumped on him and shoved my tongue down his throat. I know that he was just scared. And he wasn't out to anyone so I can understand how scary that was. But it meant that I got beat up again. The guy who walked in was like Karofsky. He was a big guy and he enjoyed the taunting. But he made James join in on beating me up. He didn't even try to stop it, I was so shocked."

Kurt's eyes filled with tears. He imagined a younger; more na�ve Blaine's first kiss, and wished it had been as perfect as their first kiss had been. Now he knew why Blaine had understood how horrified he was when Karofsky had kissed him. And why he'd tried so hard to protect him. And even why he had tried to reach out to the bully.

"Anyway, after I got out of the hospital…" Blaine started

"What?" Kurt interrupted.

"I only had three broken ribs. It wasn't a big deal," Blaine explained calmly.

Kurt shook his head disbelievingly. Blaine had been beaten up so severely, that he had emerged with three broken ribs and he thought that that wasn't a big deal?

"That definitely wasn't the first time they'd put me in hospital, Kurt. But it was the time that hurt the most because James had betrayed me like that. After I got out of the hospital, his dad came to my house to talk to my dad. I thought Dad would be angry with him, and yell, but instead he made me apologise to James's father for kissing his son, and say that I'd provoked him."

Kurt couldn't believe what he was hearing. What kind of parent could do that to their child? Even if Blaine had initiated the kiss, there was no excuse for Mr Anderson's behaviour. Kurt was horrified by how matter-of-factly this was all coming from Blaine's mouth. Like it was common knowledge, and wasn't this how everyone's family was?

"Anyway, not long after, my mum decided that school was too dangerous for me, and against all Dad's objections about going to an all-boys academy, she enrolled me. Dad won't come to Dalton. He thinks it's a school for gay kids. And he's never heard me sing. He's fine with the everyday stuff, Kurt. Like if I'll sit down and watch football with him, he's just my dad. But if I want to watch America's Next Top Model, he'll make sure to ask me which of the models I think has better boobs, or a nicer ass. Two summers ago he made me help him build a car; anything to get my hands dirty and make me a "man". I don't flaunt the fact that I'm gay in front of him, Kurt. It upsets him, clearly, so I just try to avoid any touchy subjects. Which is why, me coming home with a boyfriend, even one as amazing as you, isn't going to be great news in the Anderson household."

Kurt took a shuddering breath.

"Are you sure you want to tell them about me? What if we break up?" Kurt's chest ached at the thought but he reasoned with himself that it was a valid question. If Blaine went through hell to tell his father about Kurt and then they broke up in two weeks or two months then the whole exercise seemed kind of pointless.

Blaine sat up straight and clutched onto Kurt's sleeves. "You don't think we'll last?" Blaine sounded truly upset for the first time in the whole disturbing conversation.

"No, it's not that, Blaine. I'm not taking bets on our relationship; I just don't want to put your relationship with your dad under unnecessary strain." Kurt took Blaine's face in his hands as he spoke.

"Kurt," Blaine said in a choked voice, "I meant what I said last week. I've been looking for you forever. And now I've finally realised that you've been in front of me all along, I'm not going anywhere without a fight. This is it for me, Kurt. You're it for me, Kurt."

Kurt was stunned. He couldn't believe he was holding this perfect being, who said all these wonderful things, who had been through so much, but was willing to go through even more just to be with him.

"Blaine," Kurt sighed insistently, pulling him towards him, and he suddenly knew he had to say it.

"I love you," Kurt whispered, looking at his knees, too shy and anxious to look Blaine in the eyes.

Kurt felt Blaine's hand on his chin, pulling his face up towards him. Blaine didn't even give him time to breath before he pressed their faces together and covered his lips with his own. Kurt knew Blaine loved him too, but he hadn't been in this relationship as long as Kurt had. Kurt had loved Blaine the minute he had sung about his skin-tight jeans and had smiled flirtatiously at Kurt. Blaine just needed a little longer to realise it.

It was hard to think that this boy had had such a sad time. Not now when he was grinning ridiculously into Kurt's lips and pulling him by the small of his back to sit on his lap. Not now when Kurt could feel his tongue tracing his teeth and feel Blaine's teeth softly biting his lip.

Kurt cried out softly at the nibbles and he felt Blaine getting hard again underneath him.

"Seriously, Kurt," Blaine said, reluctantly pulling away, "Parking at a playground? Worst idea you ever had."