I'm feeling excited because this is my first Valentine's day with a boyfriend! Even if we aren't in love, it will still be fun to have someone to spend the day with and go out on a date with. This is what I'm thinking about as I wait in line with Blaine at the Lima Bean. Sebastian isn't working right now, so I figured it was a safe time for us to go. Blaine still gets upset around Sebastian so I try and keep their interactions minimal.

               Even tough we had a rough patch, Blaine and I seem to be doing better. There is only one other thing that is still really bugging me. At Rachel's party, I heard Blaine tell Sebastian something along the lines of him wanting me and that I would be his. I don't know if it was just the alcohol talking or if Blaine meant that he was going to try and win me over, so I have just tried to forget about it. Blaine seems to have done the same thing.

               “So,” he says interrupting my train of thought, “got any Valentine's day plans?”

               “Well, I mean, I'm just spending the day with Sebastian, nothing too exciting. What about you?”

               Blaine suddenly starts grinning and says, “Depending on how things go, we will see what my plans are.”

               I don't have time to ask what he means by this because we are next in line and have to order.

~~~~~

               Later, sitting in an emergency Warblers meeting I find out what Blaine's plans are.

               “My fellow Warblers,” Blaine says, as he stands up and gathers our attention. “I know it's not quite Valentine's day yet, but since it is tomorrow, I was hoping maybe, you would all join me in serenading a certain individual?”

               At this news everyone begins to start voicing their opinions until Wes bangs his gavel. “Settle down!” he yells, then asks “So, Blaine. Where would this event take place?”

               “At the GAP.”

               Hmm, I think. That's strange. Why would he sing to me there? Because I'm the one he's singing to, right? I mean, this will be Blaine's way to win me over, I'm sure of it.

               The Warblers have once again broke out into chaos at this news, until Wes once again calls order. “Enough! Warbler Blaine, a follow up question. If you don't mind me asking, why the gap?” I hold my breath, for some reason anxious to hear his response.

               “Because,” Blaine answers simply, “the guy I like works there.”

               And I feel the disappointment settle in.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

               I've barely made it in my room after school before Nick and Jeff are practically attacking me.

               “The guy you like works at the GAP? Since when?” Jeff nearly screeches.

               “You like Kurt, genius! And he likes you! Except you just about killed every chance you had with him.” Nick also yells, seeming equally as upset.

               “Yeah, did you not see the way he looked when you said that? Pretty much devastated.” Jeff adds.

               “Hey,” I say defensively. “The guy I like does work at the GAP, his name is Jeremiah. And yeah, I did like Kurt, but I'm getting over him. And no, he obviously doesn't like me! He has a boyfriend, if you don't remember. Even if I still liked him, liking Kurt just seems to lead to me being heartbroken, so I have to move on.”

               Both of the boys shake their heads at me, before Jeff says “Yeah, well I don't buy it. You can say you've moved on all you want, but your actions speak otherwise. You still give him heart eyes and act like he is a god. And if Kurt's reaction is any indication, he isn't all that into his boyfriend.”

               “I probably shouldn't be telling you this, but he didn't even go to lunch after the meeting today. I think he was actually upset. Not cool man.”

               “Well great. Now I feel bad.”

               This situation has me second-guessing the whole serenading idea.

               “We will leave you alone for a bit, we just wanted to share our thoughts. Real friends are honest with each other, right?”

               I nod and say goodbye to them as they leave. What a mess.

~~~~

               I find Kurt sitting in the library a little while later and join him at a table. “Hey,” I say as I sit down.

               He looks up at me and gives a small and ungenuine smile. “Hi.”

               “So, um, about tomorrow.”

               “Yeah?” He says, looking up at me expectantly. What does he think I'm going to say? I have no idea how to read this boy right now.

               “Well, I know that tomorrow is Valentines day, and I'm kinda forcing everyone to come be my backup, so I was thinking that if you wanted to invite Sebastian to come hang with the Warblers and join in on the serenading, you are welcome too. Since he is your boyfriend and a singer.”

               Kurt looks surprised at this and thinks it over for a moment, before responding. “Oh uh, yeah, that sounds fun, I'll let him know. Thanks for inviting him.”

               “Of course, I just want you to be happy.”

               He gives me the false smile again, which makes me uncomfortable. “Well, I have to do some homework, but I just wanted to tell you that. So night.”

               With that I leave, ready to get this day over with.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

               I make it into my room before I start crying. Over Blaine.

               Which is stupid, because I have a boyfriend. And Blaine was never even mine to begin with. Yet for some reason, since the announcement of him liking another boy, I can't help but feel like I've lost him.

               I'm sitting on my bed, mulling over my feelings, with a few tears still occasionally spilling when Nick walks in.

               “Hey, did Sebastian break up with you? Or wait, is your dad in the hospital again?” I shake my head, luckily it's not either of those, especially the latter. The Warblers had helped me stay strong through my dad's coma this year, which he had luckily pulled out of. And gotten a new girl friend from, his nurse Carole.

               “No, I'm fine. It's stupid.”

               “Is it about Blaine?”

               I nod, and figure I can share with Nick.   “I didn't realize that Blaine moving on from me would hurt this bad. I know we were never really anything past friends, but now that I know he likes someone else, I feel sad about it. Which is stupid, because I have Sebastian. I don't know, I just feel upset.”

               Nick comes over and hugs me before speaking.

               “To be honest, I really thought you two would end up with each other. But right now it's not meant to be I guess. It's okay to be sad though, Kurt.”

               I nod and Nick gives me a squeeze. “Thanks for being such a good friend,” I tell him.

               Then I pull myself together and call Sebastian, who says he would love to join us tomorrow. I might as well have fun, why else have a boyfriend?

~~~~~~~

                               Kurt:

The next day at the GAP attack, I sit with Sebastian as we wait for it to start, but over hear Blaine and Jeff's conversation. Something about Blaine getting 50% off when he and his new boy get married. I try and tune them out and focus on my boyfriend. “So,” Sebastian says, as I focus back in, “how about after this, you and I go get some lunch? Then I heard some of the other Warblers talking about an after party, so maybe we could crash that? If you'd like.”    

               “Sure, if you want to. Sounds fun to me!” I say, trying to be enthusiastic.

               Instead of responding, Sebastian just leans in for a kiss. A long one. I break away after a bit, because really, we are in public and it's not necessary. He seems to be doing this more and more lately, which isn't really my thing.

               Soon after we get into position and start harmonizing as Blaine takes the lead. His voice is flawless and smooth as he sings to the boy, who I find out, is named Jeremiah. The number goes well and Sebastian, I notice, fits in with the group, which pleases me.

               Afterwards, Sebastian and I quickly head to his car. We drive to the restaurant, making small chat as we go.

               And the whole time we are in the restaurant, we hold hands and play footsie with each other. And he makes playful remarks. It should be everything I've ever wanted in a relationship, yet I'm left feeling undoubtedly empty.

               When we head back to Sebastian's car though, the atmosphere changes. He pulls me into the backseat and we start to make out. His hand is groping my ass, and I can't deny that it feels quite good. Before I know it, my shirt is halfway off, and Sebastian is trying to pull it over my head.

               “St-stop, too far,” I murmur, between breaths.

               He pulls off me, and gives me a somewhat unhappy glance. “Come on Kurt, its Valentines day. Please? Can't we get a little hot and bothered?”

               “You know I'm not comfortable with all… that.” I respond, blushing.

               He sighs, “Fine, but I hope you are soon. You can trust me.” He whispers in my ear, before placing a languid kiss on my lips. The ride to Dalton is a little tense, but Sebastian seems unfazed by what happened earlier so I try and put it behind me as well. Once we get there he says something about needing to use the restroom, so I give him a kiss on the cheek before heading off to find my fellow Warblers.

               ~~~~~~~~~~

          Blaine:

     It all went horribly wrong. I should have known serenading someone was a stupid idea. After the performance, which I thought went well, was over, Jeremiah found me to say otherwise. To make matters worse, all the Warblers saw the humiliating confrontation. And Kurt, who I usually talk to about everything, was gone, so I settled on getting my feelings out with Jeff, who was nice but not nearly as helpful. After a sorrow filled lunch, I started on my way to the Warblers party. I knew that many of the other guys had probably been there for awhile, but I hadn't really wanted to face anyone, so I had been sitting in my room and sulking. As I was on my way, I noticed Sebastian in the halls. I gave him a small wave, and he called over to me.

               “Hey Blaine, just the guy I was looking for.”

               “Who me?”

               “Of course, gorgeous,” he responds with a smirk.

               I frown, because he really shouldn't be calling me gorgeous. He's Kurt's boyfriend. “Shouldn't you be calling Kurt that?”

               He smirks again before stepping closer. “Listen, Blaine. Lady Hummel was fun for awhile but I'm over him. You look like you know a good time, if you know what I mean.” He finishes, winking at me.

               “Excuse me?” I spat back. What the heck? “Did you just call Kurt Lady Hummel?”

               “It's obvious that we are both over Kurt, so I think, with you being sex on a stick, and me being as attractive as hell, we should take advantage of the situation. If you don't want me to break up with Kurt, to spare his feelings or whatever, that's fine. It doesn't bother me if it doesn't bother you.”

               I can't even respond I'm so startled and disturbed. Finally, I say “What gives you the idea that I would ever want to be with you? Or help you cheat on Kurt?”

               Instead of answering, Sebastian just leans in and tries to kiss me. I push him back though, before he can finish the action.

               “Geez, playing hard to get Blaine? You may be like this now, but once I have you-“

               “No.” I cut him off, “you won't ‘have me' at all, under any circumstance. Frankly, I'm disgusted by your behavior and I hope Kurt never finds out. I thought you cared about him. And even though I'm over Kurt, that doesn't mean that I am into you. ”

               He snorts, and I then ask, “You liked Kurt too, didn't you?” Because he seemed to care about the boy.

               “Yeah right. I saw a pretty virgin and thought he'd be fun to mess around with. But he's too uptight. Besides, the whole innocent school boy persona you have going is way hotter. Like I said, Lady Hummel isn't that attractive. If he doesn't have those tight jeans on, he's not good for anything. All he's got is a hard case of the gay face.”

               Before I respond I hear a sniffling and turn to see Kurt, gaping at us. Then he turns and runs down the hall, muffled sobs in his wake.

               Glaring at Sebastian, I turn in Kurt's direction, but not before saying, “If you know what's good for you, you'll leave now. And don't try and talk to Kurt or I again.”

               I don't wait to see if Sebastian leaves though, because I'm already way to Kurt.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

               When I get to Kurt's room, I knock before entering. To my surprise, it's Trent that comes to the door.

               “Hey Trent, is Kurt in there? I came to check on him…” I trail off, not sure how much he knows.

               “Yeah, because of the crying? I caught him on his way in here. Let me go tell him.”

               Trent walks deeper into the room, and I wait, somewhat awkwardly by the door, until he comes back.

               “Uh, sorry Blaine, but he said he doesn't really feel like talking to anyone right now. Maybe come say hi later tonight? And will you tell the other Warblers not to expect us? Just make something up.” I nod and he thanks me, before I head down stairs.

               Is Kurt mad at me? What did I do wrong? I thought I handled the situation well, but maybe not. There is an aching in my chest, for my poor friend. Kurt's face looked so sad when he heard us talking. I wish I could comfort him.

               But instead, I put on a smile and join the Warblers, telling them that Kurt and Trent have a project that they have to finish, and no one seems too worried, except Nick, who gives me a questioning glance. I just brush it off, and I try to enjoy my day. Really, it's been the worst Valentine's ever.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 Kurt:

               “Ok, spill. You can turn Blaine away, but not me. I'm staying whether you like it or not, and we are gunna talk about this.” Trent says to me, sitting down on the bed.

                I nod and clear my throat a bit before I try talking. The tears are still coming, so I can't tell if Trent can understand me. “I-I was looking f-for Seb-Sebastian, because he'd been g-gone awhile, when I heard Blaine say ‘help you cheat on Kurt..' so I followed the noise, and I w-was curious. Then it got quiet for a bit, until I heard Sebastian say something, I-I'm not quite sure what, b-but it was enough n-noise for me to find them in the h-halls.”

               “Ok, I can understand you, keep going.”

               I start again, hating what I'm about to tell. “Th-then, I heard Blaine telling Sebastian he was disgusted with him and he felt bad for me. And even though Blaine's over me,” with that the tears just start coming again. I start sobbing and can't stop. ‘Trent, he's over me. Both of them. What did I do wrong? Why doesn't Blaine like me anymore?” I ask, as I cry into Trent's shoulder.

               “Shh, shh.” He says, patting my back. “You didn't do anything wrong, Kurt.”

               “But I did. My own b-boyfriend said…”

               “What did Sebastian say?” I must look even more upset because Trent says “Kurt, you need to tell me, I'm getting kind of worried.”

               “He-he said that… He only… The only reason he even d-dated me was because he thought I would be ‘fun to mess around with' and because I was a ‘little virgin.' He even t-told Blaine I'm only good in tight jeans. And Blaine didn't even d-defend me. He j-just stood there.”

               “You mean Blaine was agreeing with him?”

               “Well, no. They saw me after Sebastian said that, and then I ran, but Blaine didn't seem like he disagreed. He doesn't think I'm attractive either, Trent.”

               For a moment it's just silent, as I cry and Trent hugs me. I feel so hopeless. My boyfriend turned out to be like a joke, and the boy who I actually love has no feelings for me back.

               “I just, really like him. Love him actually. I think I've been ignoring my feelings, but after today, I know. Because as much as it hurt hearing Sebastian say those things about me, hearing Blaine say he's over me hurt a thousand times more.”

               Trent gives me a sad look before pulling me into a hug again. I cry myself to sleep in his arms, just wanting to end the horrible day.