(9:55)
Blaine...
(9:56)
What?

(9:57)
You know, like that dog.

(9:59)
What dog? Bradshaw?

(10:00)
No, not Bradshaw. Well, not yet.
(10:00)
That dog who lives in Bruges.

(10:03)
Is this a joke?

(10:03)
You love Google.

(10:04)
...I do?

(10:04)
Yes. Google “dog window Bruges.”

(10:05)
...

(10:05)
Do it.

(10:06)
All right, I'm doing it! Jeez.
(10:11)
I can see that, actually. I bet he'd like it.
(10:12)
What would you do?

(10:13)
I'd just play the piano all day.
(10:13)
And eat.

(10:15)
And who would pay for that?

(10:15)
Please. People would pay *me* for that. Me and my decorative window dog.

(10:16)
Are you sure about that?

(10:16)
Hey!

(10:17)
I'm just being honest.

(10:20)
Like last week?

(10:21)
...Can we talk about last week?

(10:26)
I couldn't sleep for the next two days.

(10:27)
I'm sorry.

(10:33)
I was up all night, because I kept thinking about what you said and what you meant by it and I didn't know what to make of it. What you expected me to do with it.
(10:34)
I'm still not sure that I do.
(10:37)
And I will never know why I'm always this honest with you, damn.

(10:40)
What do you want?

(10:40)
No. That's not fair. You can't just dump all that on me and expect me to direct this mess.

(10:43)
It is a mess, isn't it?

(10:44)
Pretty much.

(10:45)
I don't want it to be a mess.

(10:46)
Then what's the plan?

(10:49)
Can we be friends again?

(10:50)
Kurt...

(10:50)
I miss being your friend.

(10:51)
Kurt.

(10:55)
I miss you.
(10:56)
It's been a week and I just miss you, okay?

(10:57)
Not fair.

(10:57)
I'm sorry that I dragged you into this mess. Because it's my fault, isn't it?

(10:59)
I don't think *sorry* is gonna do it.

~~~

(11:34am)
Weeeees. He misses me.

(11:36)
No, Blaine. No. We talked about this. Remember how we talked about this?
(11:36)
We agreed that you needed time and space after what happened.

(11:38)
I texted him.

(11:38)
Why?

(11:39)
Because it's a reflex, okay?!
(11:39)
And Bruges is really pretty. Sometimes nice things make me text.

(11:40)
What?!

(11:40)
You wouldn't understand.

(11:41)
Maybe. All I know is that you have to be careful.

(11:43)
I'm careful all the time. My whole life is careful. Ever since...
(11:44)
I told him that sorry isn't enough. There, careful. Happy?

(11:45)
But what is enough?

(11:49)
I'm not jumping right into it, if that's what you're worried about. I'm not that stupid. I know where I stand.

(11:50)
Okay, good.

(11:50)
Glad to hear my misery makes you happy.

(11:51)
You know exactly what I meant.

(11:52)
...Yes. Sorry. I should stop projecting my anger onto you.

(11:52)
Does it help?

(11:53)
...For a little while?

(11:54)
Then I'm okay with it.
(11:54)
But maybe he should know how angry you are.

(11:55)
I can't do that.

(11:56)
You're too nice. Always have been.

(11:58)
I like nice. There aren't enough nice people in this world.

(11:59)
And I like you being nice, it's a gift. But not when you're being taken advantage of.

(11:59)
I've got you to watch over me.

(12:00pm)
See! You should always listen to me.

(12:01)
Yes, mom.

(12:02)
Kids these days...

~~~

(6:14pm)
I want to be your friend again. That's what I want.
(6:23)
I know that I don't have any right to say that, or ask that of you.
(6:33)
You can say no. Of course you can, why am I even saying that?
(6:35)
I just really hope that you'll consider it.

(8:01)
What kind of friendship would that even be?
(8:02)
We can't just go back to the start.

(8:03)
I know.
(8:04)
But maybe we could have a fresh start?

(8:05)
A fresh start?

(8:05)
Without secrets; with honesty.

(8:09)
I've always been honest.

(8:10)
But maybe *I* haven't always been honest.

(8:11)
Is that so?

(8:12)
You know what I mean.

(8:17)
Are you busy?

(8:18)
What?
(8:18)
No.

(8:19)
Okay.
(8:20)
Do you love him?

(8:24)
...Blaine?

(8:25)
Come on, I'm starting with an easy one.

(8:26)
Starting...?
(8:28)
Yes. Yes, I love him.

(8:33)
Would you tell him about me, if we were to start anew?

(8:40)
Yes.

(8:42)
Do you or did you ever have feelings for me?

(8:43)
Blaine.

(8:44)
No. I need to know. I need to know, because I'm not getting into this again blind.

(8:44)
Shit, Blaine.

(8:44)
Outgoing call
“Whoa... Hi.”

“Hey. I can't do this over texts.”

“And here I thought that I was in control for once.”

“...What? Is this okay? I mean... I can hang up, that's fine; I'd get it, I just th-”

“Calm down. You really do get all rambly when you're nervous. Maybe I'm the one in control after all.”

“This isn't funny.”

“It kind of is.”

“...”

“Go on. I'm listening.”

“I asked you to meet me because I didn't know what to think anymore. And then I saw you and I still didn't know what to think. I thought it would help me. I thought meeting you would make everything right again, but we both know that didn't work out.

“…Yes. Yes, I thought I could have feelings for you, and walking into that coffee shop would've felt like cheating, in a way. I could never do that. I'm not... That's not... I'm sorry for leaving you like that – it wasn't one of my finest moments. Retreating and clearing my head was the only option I could think of... And I'm sorry if that made you feel like I let you down or used you or...

“Blaine? ...Are you even still with me?”

“You were scared.”

“...I was, yes. And I still am. I'm scared of messing it up all over again and I'm scared of losing you. ...Does that make me the most selfish person on the planet?”

“Maybe.”

“Mhhh.”

“You can't have it all.”

“I know. I'm asking a lot of you.”

“You're asking a lot of everyone here, yourself included.”

“But is that so wrong?”

“So you chose him.”

“What? I didn't catch th-”

“Did you... I said that you chose him.”

“I... Yes, I did. I have to. I'm sor-”

“No. No... I know I've been angry and hurt and confused – but I don't actually have the right to be angry about that. I always knew that you had a boyfriend. You told me, pretty much right from the beginning.”

“But-”

“No but. You said that you had this idea of me, of us, in your head and apparently so did I. And that's nobody's fault but mine.”

“...Do we even know what we're doing at all?”

“No, but at least we agree on that. ...Thank you.”

“...What for?”

“For this. For trying to explain. For being so honest. For calling me. That took a lot of guts. You could've just send me a text and been done with it.”

“I would never do that.”

“So... Friends, huh?”

“Yes... If that's what you want. I don't expect you to... I mean, I know this can't be dealt with in a day and- … Are you laughing?”

“No.”

“You're totally laughing.”

“I'm not laughing. ...Wait, what was that?”

“What was what?”

“That sound.”

“What... Oh. That. That's James.”

“...Who? Don't tell me there's another boyfriend. I'm just getting used to the oth-”

“Oh, no no no. He's the second roommate.”

“Oh, okay. ...Wait. Why does he make sounds like that?!”

“He always makes them when he's happy. And he's almost always happy about a belly rub.”

“...Excuse me?!”

“He's a cat, Blaine.”

“...A cat.”

“Yes.”

“You have a cat.”

“Yes.”

“The roommate you told me about weeks ago is a cat. A cat.”

“Yes.”

“...”

“...You're definitely laughing now.”

“...I can't...”

“Blaine!”

“Oh my god...!”

“Will you just stop? ...You basically said that Bradshaw was your son! ...Blaine!”

“Oh god... Okay, I'm back.”

“Great.”

“Why didn't you ever tell me that you have a cat?”

“I didn't tell you a lot of things. Fresh start, remember?”

“I don't remember agreeing to that.”

“Oh, right... I just hoped... but that's okay, I-”

“Kurt?”

“Yes?”

“I'll think about it.”

“Okay. Thank you.”

“Mhm. That's all I can say for now.”

“Okay. So, I guess...”

“Yeah. I'll be in touch.”

“That sounds really formal.”

“I can be formal. You should see me in a suit. ...Uhm. But yeah, I'll... You'll hear from me.”

“Okay, good.”

“Bye, Kurt.”

“Bye.”

******

Wed 28 Jan (4:01pm)
What's he like?

(4:11)
Is this a test?

(4:12)
And what kind of test would that be?

(4:13)
I don't know. All those questions from before, too... I feel like you're testing me.

(4:15)
I'm just trying to see if the fresh start and honesty thing actually works.

(4:15)
So this *is* a test.

(4:16)
It's just a simple question.

(4:18)
And you want to know... why?

(4:19)
Friends know these things about each other's lives.

(4:21)
Are you saying yes to the friendship?

(4:22)
You're jumping ahead.

(4:23)
Right. Test comes first.

(4:25)
This is not a test.

(4:28)
Okay.
(4:45)
He's... When I first came to New York, it was... It was all I ever wanted, all I'd been working for, hoping for, and it felt fantastic. Still does. But it was overwhelming, too, still is. In Lima, my only goal was to get out. It was all I ever focused on. When I got to New York, all of that changed. I could've done anything, become anything – anyone. That's kind of the best and the scariest feeling in the world.
(4:47)
Ethan is... He knows what he wants. He's calm and focused and the most confident person I've ever met.
(4:48)
He's been my rock.
(4:59)
Was that too much?

(5:01)
No.

(5:02)
So did I pass?

(5:04)
Not a test, Kurt.
(5:23)
Lima?

(5:24)
Yes.
(5:26)
Kurt Hummel, 21, studying fashion design at Parsons, living with his best friend and a cat in Chelsea, born in Lima, Ohio.

(5:28)
Oh god.
(5:30)
Blaine Anderson, 21, studying music education at NYU, new dog owner, living in the Upper West Side, born in Columbus, Ohio.
(5:31)
Nice to meet you, Kurt.

(5:33)
Nice to meet you too, Blaine. :)
(5:35)
...Wait. Waiiiiit a second. 21??

(5:36)
...Yeah. About that...

tbc