May 10, 2013, 12:02 a.m.
Sugar Baby: Thirty-Two
E - Words: 2,126 - Last Updated: May 10, 2013 Story: Complete - Chapters: 32/32 - Created: Dec 11, 2012 - Updated: May 10, 2013 169 0 0 0 1
Ohio welcomed Kurt back with open arms. He told people that his relationship with Blaine Anderson was over, but now he was happy with his son and the woman his parents had intended to be his legal guardian had they died before he was eighteen. He tried to date for almost two years, found sweet, smart boys his own age who loved him from his head to his toes and everything in between. Yet he imagined dark curls loosened from their gel and callused fingertips in their place, soft lips caressing pleasure into every inch of him, gliding up his neck to whisper I love you like a prayer against his lips.
He found solace in his friends, who were there for him and only too happy to offer their babysitting services while he was looking for work, earning the money to move to New York when he graduated. Mercedes and Tina could not have been happier to have him back and meet Alex, though they both expressed a profound sympathetic sadness that Blaine had broke up with him. To Kurt's surprise, Finn Hudson came to stand at his side, telling him his mother was a doctor and would be only too happy to treat him and Alex for a while, becoming something of an uncle to Alex.
Kurt ached for Blaine every day. He missed him, desperately, but he was determined to try and get over him, just as he had wanted. But the day Alex first tentatively said, "Daddy," Kurt had to lock himself in his bedroom and cry, because he wanted Blaine there with him, proud of their boy. When Alex took his first uncertain step, his little hands wiped the tears from Kurt's face, his high, clear voice asking, "Why you sad, Daddy?" while his little brow creased with worry. Every relationship Kurt tried to have ended with an inevitable, "It's not you, it's me. I'm still in love with someone else."
When his nineteenth birthday came, the last in Ohio before he began a paid internship at Vogue that he had been lucky enough to be given the honour of successfully applying for, Quinn tearfully threw him a birthday party and invited their friends from New York, including Blaine. For the week between her tentatively telling him and the night of the party, Kurt thought of everything, of the promises and the plans they'd made, for forever and to commit and to love each other and to be a family. And Blaine had blown everything away like ash in the wind, with his concern for Kurt's future and happiness, when all Kurt could see in his future was Blaine, making him happy.
The buzzer drilled obnoxiously through the apartment, and Kurt heard Quinn cheerfully chirp, "Come on up," and peered through at her, hanging up her apron and smoothing her hair back neatly, ever the perfect hostess. He checked his hair again, adjusted the jumper to fall artfully over one shoulder and picked Alex up, balancing him on his hip and pressing a kiss into his soft, dark curls.
He went outside to find Santana and Brittany already there, glasses in their hands and talking and laughing with Quinn, until Brittany caught sight of Alex and clapped her hands, skipping over to ruffle his hair and kiss his cheek as Alex hid his face in Kurt's shoulder, shying away from the stranger. "Come on, tiger, say hi," Kurt whispered. "She's not scary at all, and she knows all about the fairies at the end of the rainbow."
"I even saw one once," Brittany whispered conspiratorially to the boy, whose eyes widened as he stretched out his arms for Brittany, and she spirited him away to weave stories about fairies and gold as Kurt smiled on them and leaned against the table, grabbing at the wine and swallowing a glass in one mouthful. He ignored Quinn's raised eyebrow and turned to a conversation with Santana as more guests arrived, including an utterly starstruck Mercedes and Tina and a nervous Finn, who handed him a present with a shaky grin.
When the buzzer sounded again as Kurt chattered with Tina about her looming entrance to NYADA, bouncing Alex on his knee as the boy giggled and sang some unintelligible song to himself, Quinn let the new arrival up with a wink to Kurt. The door opened and Kurt felt the breath catch in his throat at the sight of Blaine, as beautiful as ever and there, waiting for him, just like he'd promised to be. Blaine's eyes ran across the room, and widened as they met Kurt's, drifting down to Alex in his lap, gazing at the little boy who had obviously inherited Blaine's distinctive golden eyes.
"The sexual tension is killing me, please go make out in the hallway and let us enjoy this party without feeling like we are being burned," Santana drawled to an irate glance from Tina. Kurt stood up, holding Alex close, and tugged Blaine into the bedroom by the hand, shutting the door firmly behind the three of them.
"Is this him?" Blaine asked softly, and Kurt nodded with a smile, beckoning Blaine closer and pressing a kiss against the top of Alex's head. "He looks just like you. Can I...can I hold him?"
"Oh, well, he doesn't really like strangers, but you can try," Kurt answered, carefully manoeuvring Alex from his position, clinging to his side, to Blaine's open arms, smiling as he watched this man, the man he was still so irrevocably in love with, adjusting his arms carefully to hold Alex better, loving that he didn't shy away from Blaine, that maybe he still remembered him in some way, even though he'd been barely two months old when Blaine had forced him to leave New York to find his dreams. "I think he likes you," he observed fondly. "Alex, baby, can you say 'Papa'? This is your papa, tiger."
Alex blinked up at Blaine, long eyelashes brushing his flushed cheeks, gold eyes gazing into gold eyes. Finally, he snuggled up against Blaine, curling his fingers into the fabric of Blaine's shirt and murmuring, "Pappy."
Blaine laughed, his eyes wet with tears, and cuddled Alex closer, smiling up at Kurt with his eyes shining and a single tear sliding down his unshaven cheek. "God, he's amazing," he whispered, and Kurt shifted closer on the bed, squeezing Blaine's shoulder gently and stroking Alex's down of dark hair. "He's so beautiful. I can't believe we made him."
"Well, you got to do the fun part," Kurt teased, eyes positively glittering with happiness as Blaine turned to look at him. "I had to do the painful bit. But he's so worth it. I've never loved anything as much as I love him, and I don't think I ever will."
Alex looked up at them both with his round, curious eyes, and Kurt smiled at Blaine, his heart swelling with all the familiar old feelings that he hadn't tried to quash for almost two years, falling in love all over again with Blaine at his side and Alex in Blaine's arms, and his lips were on Blaine's before he made a conscious decision to kiss him, mouths moving perfectly together, prevented by their son between them from wrapping their arms around each other and moving as close as they wanted to, but it was still so perfect that tears prickled behind Kurt's eyes and it seemed as if his heart would burst with the sheer amount of love in him.
A hand smacked Kurt in the chest, and he broke away from Blaine to Alex glaring at him, arms folded. "You're squishing me," he complained, and Kurt huffed out a laugh, wiping his damp eyes with the back of his hand and smiling at Blaine.
"Baby, would you like it if I asked Mercedes and Tina to take you out for a milkshake and to the swings?" he asked, Alex's eyes lighting up at the prospect. "Daddy and Papa need some time alone to talk about things. Is that okay?"
"Can Grana come too?" Alex asked with a tilt of his head, and Kurt suppressed a snort at the nickname Alex had for Quinn, knowing how much she hated it.
"Yes honey, I'll ask Grana to go too," Kurt said, kissing Blaine's cheek and standing up to crack the door open and ask, "Mercy, Tina, Quinn, can you take Alex out, just for a while? I'll text one of you when the coast is clear. Blaine and I just need some privacy to talk about some things."
Quinn nodded and called Alex out, glaring at her nickname and the snort Santana let out, and the door shut behind the three women with Alex holding Mercedes and Tina's hands, letting Kurt slip back inside and lock the door, turning to Blaine with a soft smile playing at the corners of his mouth. "What do you want to talk about?" he asked quietly.
"I'm quitting the label," Blaine confessed quietly, giving Kurt's wide eyes a small smile. "Sam's taking over from me. I've decided that my time in the spotlight should come to an end. I'm going back to school for a while, to get a teaching degree. It was time to let go."
"I have an internship at ," Kurt blurted out. "I'm going to work in fashion, and try auditioning for a few plays. But if it doesn't work out, I'll be fine. I love designing." Looking up at Blaine, he murmured, "I've dated three people in the last two years. One told me he loved me, I broke up with him because I couldn't say it back. One asked if I was ready to have sex, I wasn't and knew I never would be, so we parted ways. The last one kept asking me about you, whether I was over you, and eventually I told him I wasn't, so he dumped me. Not a single one of those break-ups hurt me the way ours did."
"Love shouldn't hurt, Kurt," Blaine said softly, refusing to meet his eyes even as Kurt laid his hand over Blaine's. "I broke your heart, you shouldn't have to settle for me."
"I'm not settling," Kurt reassured him, raising his chin to look into his eyes and smile brightly. "I've tested the waters, and I don't want to swim in them anymore. I want to be exclusive, with you. I'll be yours, if you'll be mine. I love you, Blaine."
"I love you too," Blaine replied sweetly, and Kurt was the first to close the gap between them and lean over to kiss Blaine, wrapping his arms around him and shifting into his lap, their faces hot and wet with tears.
In that moment, they knew that this was their fate. They would spend their lives together, for better or for worse, growing and making each other better for what they had. As their mouths moved together and gentle hands explored curves and angles, relearning bodies, their future together lay out like a city of lights before them, waiting for them to step into it, hand-in-hand.
There would be telling telling Alex their love story, holding hands and smiling at their captivated son. Endless photographs taken, ingraining Blaine into their family album. Their first apartment together, decorated to Kurt's tastes, Alex with his own room and Kurt working, happier than he'd ever been. Learning to match their routines, making mistakes and learning together, waking up to each other every morning, Blaine buying the ring and contemplating each day when the right moment would be.
A screaming fight eight months after they got back together, Kurt storming out of the building only to turn up on the doorstep six days later and drop to one knee in front of Blaine's wide eyes and slack jaw, stuttering out promises of forever and apologies and fervent hopes, for Blaine to haul him to his feet and acquiesce in a hungry kiss.
A wedding in winter, the lights shimmering above them as they swayed on the dance floor, Kurt smiling as he pressed his mouth to Blaine's ear and confided that he was pregnant again, laughing at Blaine spun him around the floor, giddy with delight.
That fantasy they both had, Blaine chasing Alex around the sunlit garden of their own house, Alex shrieking with laughter when Blaine caught him and tickled him until he begged for mercy, Kurt watching from the shade of the porch, blowing a kiss to his boys as their daughter kicked at him, wanting the be a part of their perfect family moment.
While they talked all through the night, tearful and stripped down and holding each other, life carried on beyond the windows. Alex slept in his room, their friends talked quietly in the kitchen and Kurt kissed away the tears clinging to Blaine's cheeks.
Together, they stepped off the cliff and let themselves fall.