It's raining outside when Kurt wakes up, and he's always thought that there wasn't a more comforting and calming sound than raindrops against his window. Until he woke up a few weeks ago, in Blaine's arms with Blaine breathing into his ear. And then that sound replaced Kurt's old favorite sound. Everything about Blaine replaced Kurt's precious favorites. His laugh and his breathing when he is sleeping, became Kurt's favorite sound. The smell of his skin on his neck after a long day, became Kurt's favorite scent. And that shimmer of hazel and gold in his eyes, became Kurt's favorite color. The boy sighs as he opens his eyes, peeking at Blaine's face scrunched up against his neck with half of his body on top of Kurt's. Kurt smiles. Because Blaine is lying with half his weight on him, his sweaty chest against Kurt's, and his heavy breathing into Kurt's ear, not to mention how a few curls escaped from his gelled hair after yesterday's events, and Kurt thinks to himself that he have never seen him more beautiful than right now. Of course he looked absolutely stunning that first day on of school with his red bowtie, and obviously he looked adorable when he were confessing his feeling for Kurt, and he sure as hell was absolutely gorgeous and sexy yesterday, but lying like this in Kurt's arms, he is truly beautiful. Kurt pulls one of Blaine's hands up to his face to kiss his fingers and he hears a muffled sound against his neck.

”Good morning.”, Blaine groans, yawning before nuzzling closer to Kurt's half naked body.

”Hey.”, Kurt says with a soft voice and can't help but to follow Blaine's action and stretch his mouth in a yawn. 

”You're really beautiful like this.”, Blaine suddenly says and Kurt turns his head to look at him. Meeting wide, hazel eyes looking up at him while Blaine let's his fingers travel along Kurt's jaw.

Kurt simply giggles. He actually giggles. 

”And that giggle is just absolutely delightful.”, Blaine continues with a huge, loving smile.

”God, don't make me blush.”, Kurt laughs, placing a hand in front of his face.

”Don't do that.”, Blaine says quickly, pulling Kurt's hand off his face to place on his own cheek instead.

”You're such a cheesy little thing sometimes, you know that?”, Kurt says with a smirk.

”And you love it don't you?”

”That I do.”, Kurt places a kiss on Blaine's nose.

And everything is perfectly fine, lying in each others arms, kissing softly. Until Kurt hears the front door opening. He sits up quickly, with Blaine almost falling off the bed.

”Kurt, What-”, he starts but Kurt quickly places a hand over Blaine's mouth, causing the man to raise his dark eyebrows.

”Somebody just got home.”, Kurt hisses and Blaine's eyes widens.

”I thought you said the rest of your family weren't coming home until tonight?”, Blaine whispers back, quickly sitting up too.

”Well, I thought so too!”, Kurt hisses, standing up to grab his shirt and pull it over his head. Tossing Blaine's shirt to him.

”Just stay here, okay, get dressed.”, Kurt says, nervously looking out the window to see his dad's car.

Kurt looks at Blaine's devastated, panicking look on his face before walking out of his room. And a bad feeling hits his stomach because he have never seen the man's facial expression so strained and his eyes so distant. Kurt doesn't know what that look means but he bites his lips and slowly closes the door.

”Kurt?”, his fathers familiar voice shouts from downstairs. 

”Hi! I thought you weren't supposed to come home until tonight?”, Kurt tries to sound casual but obviously fails and Burt shoots him a suspicious look.

”Got on an early flight. Forgot to call you. Everything alright?”, Burt answers, taking two steps up the stairs.

”Yeah, I'm just happy to see you home early!”, Kurt tries, because while he is happy to see his father, he can not forget about the fact that his teacher is in his room, barely dressed, on his bed in this very moment.

”Well, it's good to be back home.”, Burt says, receiving a hug from his son.

”Do you want some coffee?”, Kurt continues trying to distract his father who still looks at him suspiciously.

”Sure, kiddo.”, Burt says after a while and Kurt sighs in relief, pulling his father along with him to the kitchen. 

”I'm just gonna, uhm, check my phone first, I'm waiting for Mercedes to call.”, Kurt lies as his father sits down by the kitchen table.

He shoots a smile towards his father and quickly makes his way towards the stairs just to see Blaine slowly walking down, trying his best to do it as silent as possible. Kurt just shakes his head in panic and runs over to hand Blaine his shoes. The boy opens the front door for him and whispers a quick ”I'm sorry.”, before Blaine leaves with a blank face.

”What are you doing Kurt?”, Burt shouts from the kitchen, obviously hearing the front door opening.

”Just thought I should go get the mail!”, Kurt shouts back, opening the door again.

”Kurt, there's no mail on Sundays.”, Kurt hears his father walking up behind him, ”What's going on? Why are you acting all jumpy and nervous?”

”I'm not! I'm just, I- I didn't get any sleep last night because I was up studying for an upcoming test tomorrow, so I guess i'm just a little tired.”, Kurt tells him and tried to give Burt his best oh-poor-me-I-am-so-tired look.

”Okay.”, his father says, still looking at Kurt with suspicious, confused eyes,”Anything I can help you with?”

”No.”, Kurt answers quickly, ”I, uhm, I'm just gonna go up and study a little more, I think”

He runs up the stairs, closing the door behind him. Crap. What the hell was that? Okay so he just lied to his father, one of the very few people he actually trusts. And Kurt never lies to his father, ever. Plus he basically shoved Blaine out of his house, and he still can't get that look on Blaine's face out of his mind. He looked so devastated, yet his face were completely blank. Kurt doesn't like the bad feeling in his stomach after seeing the look on his face, but he tries to ignore it. Kurt groans into his pillow and quickly realizes that it smells like Blaine. Like Blaine's hair gel. He sighs into it. This little incident better not screw things up, he thinks. They've been working too hard for everything to work out, this can not destroy that. He groans into the pillow again, muffling the sound. 

And things does not get better later that night at dinner with his father, Carole and Finn. They all sit by the table except from Carole who is supposed to be home any second. Burt and Finn are talking about some football game or whatever, Kurt does not care either way because all he can think of is Blaine. And he has this bad feeling in his stomach, and he does not like it. He does not like it that he basically shoved the man he adores out of his house. He still feels bad about it. He wishes he could just call him. But he knows he shouldn't. He gets pulled out from his thoughts when Carole arrives in the kitchen with a very familiar coat in her hands. 

”Whose jacket is this?”, she says casually and Kurt hearts drops.

”It's mine, uhm, or well it's a friends. He must've forgotten here.”, Kurt tries to say with a calm voice, standing up to grab the coat.

”Who?”, Burt asks, suddenly giving Kurt that suspicious look again. Finn just looks confused.

”Just a friend from school.”, Kurt tries, looking away to hide his blush.

”Who? I might know him!”, Finn then asks with a genuine smile and Kurt mentally groans, wanting to slap Finn, even though he didn't really do anything wrong.

”Uhm, B- Benjamin.”, Kurt tries, not daring to look his dad in the eyes just yet.

”Ah, no. I don't know any Benjamin at school.”, Finn shrugs and continues to eat his dinner. Kurt sighs in relief.

”This Benjamin kid, uhm, someone special?”, Burt starts and Kurt finally dares to meet his eyes.

”No! Just a friend, he's not even gay, so.”, Kurt lies and Burt just nods. Kurt holds up the coat a little to fold it.

”That's actually a really cool coat! I think I saw Mr Anderson having one exactly like that in school last week, they're really cool! I sort of want one myself.”, Kurt hears Finn say and then he hears someone dropping their fork. Kurt slowly looks towards the table with his heart in his throat. His father is looking him straight in the eyes.

”Yeah, I mean they're quite popular this fall, coats in general, I mean.”, Kurt starts, shooting a nervous glance towards his father's very suspicious eyes, ”But it's fun to see you that you have some sort of fashion sense, Finn. That's not really common, I mean.”, Kurt quickly continues, watching Finn roll his eyes before hearing Carole laugh. And Kurt finally allows himself to relax and breathe again. Once again, thankful for his wittiness. 

”Well, it really is a nice coat!”, Carole agrees with a smile before asking Finn something about Rachel. But Burt is still looking at Kurt with suspicious eyes. Kurt tries to give him a smile before leaving the kitchen to walk to his room with the coat in his hands. He presses his palms against his face and lets out a shaky breath once he is alone. God, this day did not turn out like what he was hoping for. He returns to the kitchen, relieved to see Burt busy in a conversation with Finn, so he seats himself by the table again, focusing on eating his dinner. 

”What the hell have I done?”, Blaine throws himself on his couch, biting his lip so hard he can taste blood. 

His thoughts are spinning around, making him feel light headed. Everything had been going so great. Him and Kurt managed to keep their relationship to themselves, and they both were perfectly okay and happy with that. And Blaine was probably the happiest he'd ever been and god, why did this had do happen? Why did Kurt's father have to arrive at home early? Or maybe the better question is, what the hell was he thinking when he decided to say yes to Kurt's suggestion that they should hang out at Kurt's house. Because Kurt is just a teenager, he lives with his parents. Parents who would be maybe more confused than furious if they found their kid's teacher hanging around in their house, lying half naked on top of the kid. 

”What am I doing?”, Blaine asks himself with a shaky voice

He can't do this. He can't risk it all. He can't risk hurting Kurt. Because the boy will be hurt if they'd ever get caught. And getting caught is something that they're risking every single second they spend together. Blaine knows he shouldn't have done this from the beginning. And what was he thinking? Letting himself stare at one of his students, feeling his heartbeat speed up in a way it never had before, at the first sight of the boy. At that first day of his new job. His new job that he have already screwed up. 

God, this is a mess, Blaine thinks, groaning loudly into his hands. He was naive for thinking that he could have a relationship with one of his students. But it felt like the most natural thing ever to him, it did. Because Kurt made him feel something he have never experienced before. Kurt made him feel like maybe life isn't so bad after all. Because Kurt is the kindest, funniest, most breathtakingly beautiful human being that Blaine have ever seen. Why, god, why did he have to be his student? Blaine groans again. Why does it have to turn out like this, the very first time he have ever felt such an intense love for someone? Why does it have to get screwed up? And it's all Blaine's fault, the man thinks to himself. Because he put himself in this situation, no one else did. Because he should have been the responsible one here, pushing his feelings and inappropriate thoughts away, pushing Kurt away. That's what he should have done from the beginning. But he didn't. And now he have put himself, and Kurt, into this mess. This one huge mess with risks of getting caught and losing his job every single time he is around the boy outside of school. 

Blaine needs to stay away from him. He can not cause any trouble to Kurt. And not to himself either, because this is is first real job. Why does he have to have these feelings for Kurt? Blaine buries his face in his shaky hands. He knows what he have to do, he just need to stay away from the boy, it's probably the best for both of them.

After a very tense dinner Kurt finally decides to call Blaine.

”Blaine?”, Kurt says into his phone after just hearing someone breathing on the other line.

”What?”, Blaine's voice snaps and Kurt raises his eyebrows a little.

”I just wanted to know if you're okay?”, Kurt tells him.

”No I am not.”, Blaine sighs again and Kurt nods with his phone pressed to his ear.

”It's okay. Nothing happened. We're okay-”, Kurt begins but quickly gets interrupted.

”Why the hell are you still acting like any of this is okay?”, Blaine snaps again.

”What-”

”You know as well as I do that what we've been doing is fucked up and completely wrong.”, Blaine almost shouts into the phone and Kurt is chocked.

”We've been acting like two naive kids, both of us. Thinking that we're living in some sort of fantasy world. But guess what, Kurt? This is the real world and I am your teacher and you are my student, and if you do not get why this is all wrong, than you're the only naive one.”

Kurt does not even know what to say, it feels like his heart stops.

”Blaine-”

”And i do not need to hear you say that we will work this out, and that it is okay and all that bullshit, because we both know damn well that it is not. Nothing about this is okay, it never was.”, Blaine continues and Kurt is still left with his jaw hanging, ”He never should have done this in the first place. It was a big mistake.”

”Blaine, I-”, Kurt tries with tears in his eyes, but once again, gets interrupted.

”No, Kurt. Just, don't. Don't talk to me tomorrow in class, please. We should just, stop talking. I need you to respect that.”, the voice on the other line says and Kurt can barely even recognize it anymore. And then he hears a beep from his phone because Blaine decided to hang up. Kurt is left speechless. His body does not know how to react because he is too chocked. He does not want to believe the man's words. It didn't even sound like him. Kurt bites his lip. Maybe Blaine is just upset because of what could have happened earlier, Kurt thinks, trying to calm himself down. Still though, he cries himself to sleep that night.

The next day, Monday, Kurt does not dare to arrive early to the class. He feels like he needs do what Blaine told him to over the phone, and to give Blaine space, just like he did the day after their first kiss. Kurt arrives to the classroom at the same time as the other student and seats himself by his usual desk in front of the teacher. Kurt slowly looks up, and to his surprise, Blaine is not standing there. Instead, their geography teacher, Miss Doosenbury, is standing in front of the class with a tired look in her eyes. Kurt barely hears the teacher saying that they should keep working on their essays that Mr Anderson had assigned them, because something is not right and he can feel it. That bad feeling in his stomach is just getting worse and he feel like he might throw up. He feels sick. 

He can't focus for the rest of that class, because he can feel his heart speeding up in a nervous way and that heavy feeling in his stomach growing stronger every second. He can't focus on anything right now. And Blaine does not appear during that class, and when school's over for the day, Kurt still haven't seen the man. And somewhere in his mind, he knows that what Blaine said over the phone last night, might have been for real. He wasn't just upset. Maybe he really meant what he said.

Kurt swallows loudly, noticing his hands shaking like crazy.

”Kurt? Glee is about to start, you coming?”, Kurt hears Mercedes behind him in the hallway but he does not care because his body is taking control over him and just walks out of the school, without responding to his friend. 

He seats himself in the car, catching his breath. He starts the car and he can only get himself to drive towards one specific location. He ends up outside a familiar apartment and basically runs out of his car and into the building. He runs up the stairs and does not even have time to catch his breath when he knocks fanatically on the wooden door. He is breathing heavily as the door slowly opens. Kurt is about to open his mouth to say something about how sorry he is and how they will fix this together, but it's not Blaine that greets him at the door. 

”Cooper?”, Kurt asks a little breathless, feeling like he is about to burst into tears any second.

”Uhm, hi?”, Blaine's brother answers, sounding a little confused.

”Oh wait it's you! Blaine's 'friend'.”, Cooper then reminds himself, giving Kurt a wink at that last word and now Kurt really feels like he is about to break down.

”Uhm, is Blaine home?”, Kurt manages to say.

”No actually! I'm just here to pick up some records that I borrowed him.”, Cooper explains casually, holding up two vinyls in his hand.

”Okay, uhm, do you know where he is?”, Kurt tries his very best to keep his voice calm and steady.

”He's at our parents house in Columbus! I don't really know why, he just told me he was going there for the rest of the week or so. He got off work and all!”, Cooper smiles towards Kurt who simply nods. 

Great. So now Blaine is out of town in his parents house for the rest of the week, and the last time they saw each other was when Kurt was shoving him out of his house. And the last time they talked Blaine basically stated they could not keep seeing each other. And Kurt knows that he did nothing wrong and that it is what could have happened that caused Blaine react like he did. But he still feels sick He still feel so bad about it, like it's all his fault.

”So he's coming home at the end of this week?”, Kurt tries.

”I'm not sure actually, he just told me he needed some rest for a while. And our parents are in Europe right now so he just drove to their house to live there alone for a little while.”, Cooper shrugs and Kurt nods, biting his lips.

”Thank you.”, Kurt sighs, turning around to walk out to his car again.

”No problem!”

Kurt just drives. He drives until he barely knows where he is anymore, and eventually he turns the car around, to drive home again. He is clenching his teeth and crying his eyes out, but without any sort of emotion showing on his face. Did Blaine really meant what he told him over the phone? Did yesterday's happening really scare him that much? Was it so bad that Blaine felt the need to leave town? And without even telling Kurt? Like he just wanted to disappear without Kurt knowing? And he surely does not want to see Kurt, because for what else reason would he go to live in his parents house in Columbus, for god knows how long, when he have an apartment of his own. Kurt shakes his head, and suddenly it hits him for real. Those risk they had talked about. They almost got caught yesterday. Because who knows what would happen if his father walked in while Kurt was sleeping, shirtless, in the arms of his teacher? Kurt bites his lip so hard that he can taste blood. But he does not care. That is why Blaine got so upset, because it was so close that one of those risks happened, screwing everything up. And it's why Blaine just left town all of a sudden. Because yesterday was a pretty clear sign of how not normal their relationship is. And how easy it is to cause trouble when they're with each other. Kurt cries even harder. Because Blaine now knows what kinds of trouble their relationship might cause, and maybe he does not think the risks are worth taking. Kurt is crying his sad eyes out and his chest feels heavy when he tries his best to breath calmly. He shakes his head. Because in his mind, he is willing to take every single risk, he will risk it all, just to be with Blaine. Even if it's not forever. He'd still risk everything, because Kurt has never felt more at home than in those damn arms and his body has never ached so much for someones touch. Kurt's tears are still falling endlessly, his breathing ragged. 

And that's how the next few weeks turns out. Kurt crying his eyes out, not being able to focus on anything, because he can not get his damn mind of Blaine. Blaine who is out of town, not wanting to see Kurt. And Kurt feels heartbroken.