Author's Notes: The next week or so held every emotion Kurt could put a name to, plus a few he couldn't. It seemed to roll over him at the most unexpected times, like waves crashing to shore. One minute he would be fine, the next tears would be streaming down his face as he realised once again that no - he couldn't just call his Dad up and recount his day.


Blaine had his moments too. At first, he'd tried to hide his grief; not wanting to detract from Kurt's pain. However, this lasted all of a couple of days until Kurt found him curled up in a ball in the bathroom, tear tracks winding a damp trail down his cheeks. Kurt had pulled him up and into a strong hug.


"If we're going to do this, we do it together. Okay?" His tone had been fierce and commanding and Blaine had nodded into his shoulder.

After that, they had taken to working more as a team, handling everyday life together. They kept in regular contact with Carol and Finn. Blaine encouraged Kurt to continue with his outings; if nothing else it stopped them both from going stir crazy stuck in the house all the time.

Nearly two weeks after they arrived back in New York Kurt decided he wanted to try going back to work, Caryn had done a great job holding down the fort while Kurt had been away, but she couldn't go much longer without Kurt as the chief designer.

So it was that Kurt found himself sat in his office come work- room surrounded by reams of fabric and an almost complete dress that Caryn had put together. They had both hit a road block. The original design was beautiful, drawn almost a month ago and they had been making great headway when Caryn had stopped, cocked her head and declared that 'something was missing'. They were both stood staring at the pearlescent cream; knee length gown trying to figure out what needed changing. The tailoring was perfect to Kurt's well- trained eye, the draping had been executed well, but Caryn was right. While the dress was beautiful, something was just off. They sat like that for a good twenty minutes before Caryn stood, un-pinned the black lace detailing and repositioned it over the bodice rather than the skirt. Kurt looked it over, snipping at a few pieces to make the fit better and declare it ready to be sewn on.

They worked happily together, only stopping to greet new clients until the door opened around half twelve. Caryn smiled at Blaine and waved him through into Kurt's office. Kurt didn't even look up when Blaine entered, instead began firing off orders, obviously meant for Caryn. Blaine just smiled and perched himself on the edge of one of the work surfaces that Kurt had scattered an array of scissors, thread and off cuts. Kurt seemed to realise he wasn't Caryn and turned to look at Blaine, a broad grin lighting up his face.

"Hey, I didn't know you were stopping by today." He pressed a small kiss to Blaine's lips and accepted the brown paper bag Blaine offered.

"Ooh, Betsy's! You spoil me."

"Well I don't start back at work until tomorrow so I thought I'd come see how you're getting on... and sneak you lunch of course!" He moved to join Kurt at the desk and unwrapped his own sandwich; Kurt had already decimated half of his.

"It's been good, busy. Caryn's been a big help, I think with a little more training and once she finished college I'd like to offer her a job." He glanced up at Blaine, awaiting his response, it was a fairly new idea, but considering she'd kept the boutique running smoothly, kept the books and designed a couple of the clients commissions herself, he thought it was about time she was rewarded.

"That sounds good - obviously you know her far better than I do, but she seems more than capable to me. I get the feeling it's more than just what she's capable of that's convinced you though..." He observed Kurt's mannerisms, searching for any sense of obligation or uncertainty; finding none, he returned his attention to his food, while staying tuned into Kurt, knowing this was a big decision for him.

"Yeah I mean she's proven she knows what she's doing, her technical skills are practically perfect. She knows how to interact with clients and her instincts are amazing. We're on the same page, I trust her, and for my first permanent member of staff I can't imagine anyone better." Kurt was quiet, but thoughtful. Blaine smiled and agreed, turning the conversation onto more trivial subjects, secretly proud of all Kurt had achieved, of his willingness to take this new step.


**

Time progressed more quickly for the boys once they were back at work, the days were easier to get through; the nights still held difficulties. Kurt had started having nightmares and woke covered in sweat, a scream dying in his throat more than once, but was always comforted by a pair of strong arms and murmured nothings right by his ear. Soon enough it had been nearly three months since Burt's death and Carol was coming to visit, Blaine having insisted on flying her out, knowing Kurt could really use her gentle motherly ways. While he did everything he could to help Kurt through this, sometimes you just need family, and Carol was exceptional. He suspected the house in Lima could get rather lonely for her too.

They were on the way to the airport to pick her up, Kurt was somewhat quiet the whole ride. Once inside he seemed nervous, Blaine tried to keep him calm, running his hands up Kurt's arms and pecking him sweetly, but nothing
seemed to help.

Eventually Blaine got them both seats near the gate and waited for Kurt to talk to him.

"I just don't want to break down in the airport." His words were muted and he avoided Blaine's eyes.

"Why - "

"Because Dad won't come through that gate." And suddenly Blaine understood completely. "Because when Carol comes through she's not going to look tiny compared to the big lug next to her. I'm scared it's going to hurt too much."

"Baby, even if it is too much, there's nothing wrong with that. I'm right here, Carol's going to be here and you can be sure as hell that you won't be crying for long once she gets her hands on you!" This earned him a watery chuckle and Kurt finally raised his eyes to look at his boyfriend.

"True, small but mighty that woman." He pressed a kiss to Blaine's shoulder and rested his head in the crook of his neck.

"I was expecting some kind of affection but I'd kinda hoped it would be directed at me!" Carol's soft voice embraced the boys. Their heads shot up and Kurt instantly jumped to his feet and enveloped his step - mother in a warm hug.

"You have better ninja skills than I suspected, am I going to have to watch you this entire trip?!" Carol
laughed and turned to hug Blaine.

"I think it's less my ninja skills than the fact that you two were so absorbed in each other, now what's a girl got to do to get a coffee round here?" Carol's good-natured jibing carried them right out the airport, to a coffee shop and home, keeping Kurt distracted enough that his fears seemed unfounded. A small twinge of jealousy shot through Blaine as he watched the two interact, wishing he had a relationship with his own mother, but his brain kicked in when he realised Carol would always treat him as much her son as Finn and Kurt - and she always had.

Once back at the apartment Carol dumped her luggage in Kurt's spare room and shooed Kurt from the kitchen so she could make lunch. They settled into an easy conversation as they ate, Carol quizzing them on what they'd been up to since their return to New York. They didn't avoid talking of Burt, and Kurt was surprised how easily Carol seemed to be able to talk about it. He watched her interact with Blaine for a while, marveling at the strength of the woman before him. She had the ability to just cope with whatever life threw at her; she just carried on and got on with life. Kurt knew she must be worried, with Burt's death came a whole new set of difficulties for her, between less money coming in, a large house to consider and being on her own for the first time in over ten years, Kurt wasn't sure how she did it. He knew Burt had been her anchor, now she had to find a new one.

Later that night they discussed how Carol would keep herself busy while Kurt and Blaine were at work, she revealed she already had plans for some days and told them not to worry about her. She withdrew to the bedroom not long after to unpack and relax, leaving Kurt and Blaine cuddled up on the sofa alone with their thoughts.

**

On Wednesday, both Kurt and Blaine had the day off, they were planning on surprising Carol with their plans, having already made sure she didn't plan anything of her own for that day.

"Carol we need to be leaving, like now!" Blaine called through the apartment.

"Oh hush, I have at least five more minutes, I bet Kurt's not even ready yet." Her voice filtered through the closed door of the spare bedroom.

"I am too... almost."

Blaine chuckled and sat himself on the arm of the sofa. True to form Carol was the first to surface, Kurt not too far behind her and Blaine only had to hurry them a little to get to Central park on time. Kurt's excitement grew with every step, the closer they got the more bouncy he became until Carol demanded to know where they were going. Kurt pulled them to one side to avoid them all getting trampled by over -zealous New Yorkers.

"Okay, so it's Alana Brigiite's twentieth anniversary of the release of her first line, and to celebrate she gathered a few choice people and organised a fun fair. But not just any funfair... oh no, this is a vintage funfair, complete with an embedded circus and everyone in one of a kind vintage themed Brigiite designs." He spoke quickly with far too many hand gestures than were strictly necessary. Carol traded a grin with Blaine.

"And as you know it was Alana who gave Kurt his start, he's remained good friends with her and was one of the 'choice people' she called in to help plan and design the whole event. Naturally he was given tickets, which I don't mind telling you ought to have cost more than his entire outfit, and here we are." Blaine concluded, grabbing Kurt's hand in an attempt to calm him a little.

"Well we'd better get moving then." Carol linked arms with Kurt and they marched the last couple of blocks to central park. The sun beat down on the lines of beautifully dressed people waiting for admission to the party of the year. Kurt bypassed the queues completely, presenting his ticket to the attendant and led Carol and Blaine determinedly towards an ornate tent to the left of the fountains. A small group of what were obviously 'industry' people crowded around the woman Blaine knew as Alana from the time Kurt had attended work parties with Blaine as his plus one. She spotted Kurt and instantly abandoned her groupies and engulfed him in a heavily perfumed hug.

"Darling, it's so good to see you... dear God save me!" The last part was whispered and followed up by a large boisterous laugh. She was a tiny woman of 5' 2" with uncontrollably curly blonde hair, today pulled up into what was probably an elegant chignon, now it resembled a bird's nest. She wore a heavily customized prom style dress in a deep Claret red with black polka dots and the most outrageously high heels Blaine had seen. None of this fazed Kurt of course who just giggled and kissed her on the cheek pulling her a little further away from the fashion mob.

"Alana, everything looks gorgeous, of course. This is my Step-Mom, Carol,..." He paused while Alana air-kissed Carol. "And this is Blaine."

"Of course I remember Blaine, how are you gorgeous?" Alana had always had a soft spot for Blaine. She'd even tried to get him to model for her once. She'd been quite disappointed when he'd left, sticking firmly with Kurt, but never quite giving up hope.

"I'm well thank you, this is quite an event you've got going on, it looks beautiful, as do you, by the way." He flashed her his most charming smile which she returned, amping up the wattage somewhat.

"Well, thank your beau here. He suggested the theme months ago, and helped me pull together some of the finer details." She extended freshly manicured hands to Kurt, who ducked his head in recognition. They all chatted for a while until Blaine spotted a hook-a-duck booth and pestered Kurt into submission, dragging both him and Carol away while Alana waved them off telling them to enjoy. The vendor handed Blaine a long pole with a hook on the end and moved to the side as Blaine tried to hook one of the plastic yellow ducks. It took three attempts but he eventually succeeded in hooking one of the biggest ducks, which entitled him to either a fish or a medium sized teddy bear which he held close to his chest while they roamed. The park was almost unrecognisable, pop up booths, rides and stalls were everywhere, everything from whack - a - mole to the waltzes. It seemed that even though the fair was vintage themed Alana couldn't resist some of the newer aspects of a funfair. Carol seemed to be having the time of her life, she bought cotton candy and giggled and the boys' attempts on various booths.

They came across a Man of Steel booth. Basically, the contestant had to hit a giant red button as hard as you could and if you ranked above a certain number you won a prize. Blaine instantly demanded he have a go. They got in line and when it was Blaine's turn, he put on a bit of a show rolling up his sleeves and stretching for the crowds’ amusement before picking up the out-sized hammer and lofting it above his head waggling his eyebrows at Kurt before putting all his strength behind it and swinging it down to hit the button. Lights instantly started shooting up and down and a red meter shot up the length of the attraction. Three bells rang signaling Blaine had won a prize, the attendant looked suitably impressed and gave Blaine the option of two positively ginormous stuffed toys. Blaine picked a crocodile that sported a pair of black sunglasses and presented it to Kurt.

"For the most dashing man in attendance today." Kurt could feel his cheeks heat up, but smiled happily and took the crocodile from Blaine.

"Thank you, however I've heard Chris Pine is here, so you may want to rethink that." Blaine hit him lightly on the arm and pulled him in the direction of a jewellery stall that Carol had been eyeing up for the past hour or so. They laughed the afternoon away, spending copious amounts on various attractions, Kurt and Blaine went on a few rides while Carol watched and giggled. Carol tried her hand at shooting cans and won a small meerkat toy, which she pressed into her Gucci handbag (purchased by Kurt for Christmas) and declared it Finn's present from the big apple. They met up with Alana and an entire tent full of people for a bite to eat before making their way back to Kurt's apartment around seven pm. Once back, they all collapsed; exhausted, in the living room. All in all it had been a long, eventful, laughter filled day, one of the first where Kurt found he didn't think of his Dad in terms of sadness or mourning, but in terms of happiness and memories. He looked forward to many more just like that.