June 18, 2012, 2:08 p.m.
I Finally Found You: Chapter 4
E - Words: 1,073 - Last Updated: Jun 18, 2012 Story: Closed - Chapters: 4/? - Created: May 09, 2012 - Updated: Jun 18, 2012 106 0 1 0 0
Kurt walked into the coffee shop down the street from his apartment 25 minutes later (he was having a bad hair day), the smell of coffee and freshly baked scones attacking his nose. His eyes scanned the few tables for that gelled head of hair, and he found Blaine sitting with his back turned to the door in the back of the cafe. Blaine appeared to have his phone to his ear, and the closer Kurt got, the more he could hear from the conversation happening.
"Yeah, Coop, I know. I'm trying to fix things...yes, Cooper, I already know I'm an idiot...well, that's up to him, I can't control things like that...oh, Coop, he's here, I'll let you go....no, I'm not...okay, fine. Bye."
Kurt circled the table and grabbed the seat sitting directly across from Blaine. He glanced at the cup in front of him, and gave Blaine a quizzical look.
"Medium drip for me, and a non-fat grande mocha for you," Blaine said with a small smile. "Sorry about that, Cooper was politely reminding me that I'm an asshole...and he says hi, by the way," he finished, a small chuckle escaping from his lips. Kurt couldn't help but smile. "I've always loved Cooper," he said softly. "You'll have to be sure to tell him I said hello, and I hope he's staying out of trouble."
There was a moment of uncomfortable silence before Blaine spoke. "Kurt, I'm just going to start. You don't owe me an explanation for anything...but I have a lot of explaining to do." Kurt nodded for Blaine to continue. Blaine took a deep breath and continued to speak.
"Kurt...I could say I'm sorry over a million times, and it will never be enough for what I did to you. I don't expect you to forgive me, ever. I was selfish, and cruel, and a complete idiot for what I did. I thought I was doing the right thing at the time, though. Whenever I called you, when you first started school...you seemed so happy. You loved the city, you loved school, you loved your new friends...and I felt that with me stuck in Lima, I was holding you back. You couldn't do this because you had to Skype with me, you couldn't do that because I was coming to visit...I could see that I was holding you back. So... I figured that a clean break was what was best for us. I told everyone not to give you my new phone number, not to tell them where I was living, nothing. I was hoping eventually you'd forget me. I know now that that was probably the dumbest idea I've ever had. It tore me apart, Kurt. I gave up the only person who ever mattered to me because of a silly idea I had in my head." Kurt could see Blaine's eyes shining with unshed tears. He became aware of the tears in his own eyes threatening to spill over, but quickly willed them to stay in his eyes. He couldn't cry now. Kurt took a shaky breath and began to spill his heart out.
"Blaine, you broke me. I missed two full weeks of classes after you stopped talking to me. I almost failed out of my first semester of school because of you. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat, I couldn't stop crying. I was completely and utterly broken. Even when I started going back to school, I would come home and go straight to my room. Rachel and Santana practically had to force feed me in order to get me to eat." Kurt stopped to take a sip of his coffee.
"You must hate me," Blaine said softly, his sad eyes looking into Kurt's.
"That's the shitty thing about this...or maybe the good thing. I don't know, I can't decide yet," he said with a sigh. "I don't hate you. I never have. I was mad at you for a long time...and I still kind of am. But I never hated you. I couldn't do that. I love...loved you too much. I can't hate you," he said. A flicker of hope crossed Blaine's eyes. The two of them were silent for a few moments, focusing on the tops of their coffee mugs, before Kurt spoke again.
"So...what are we going to do? About us," he said softly.
Blaine cleared his throat. "I know I don't deserve your forgiveness," he said, "and I'm not asking you to forgive me right now. I would like a chance, though. A chance to make things right. And I'm not saying that we have to get back together, or anything...but I'd like to be friends. At the very least, civil acquaintances. I can't go any longer with not talking to you, Kurt. And it'll be easy now, because Coop lives in the city...and I'm living with him now. So...if you want to be friends, or at least civil towards each other, I'll be ridiculously happy...but if you don't want to be friends, I'll completely understand."
Kurt was almost mad at himself for how quickly he answered. "Friends....I'd like that, I think."
A broad smile crossed Blaine's face as he covered Kurt's hands with his owns. Kurt quickly flinched away, placing his hands in his lap instead of on the table. The smile on Blaine's face faltered slightly.
"Friends," Blaine clarified.
The two boys talked for a short while longer before saying their goodbyes. As Kurt headed home, he couldn't help but keep the smile on his face. Despite everything Blaine had done, Kurt simply missed Blaine.
"You look happy," Santana pointed out as Kurt entered the apartment. "Things go well?"
"Actually...yeah, 'tana, they did. They really did."
Santana shot Kurt a warm smile. "Well, since I don't have to sit here and comfort your ass, I'm gonna go shopping." She hopped up from the couch, placed a kiss on Kurt's cheek, and left the apartment. Kurt plopped down onto the couch and pulled his phone from his pocket. He saw that he had two unread messages.
From: Blaine
Thank you for meeting with me today. I can tell this is the start of something good. xo
From: Unknown
KUUUUUUUUUUUUURT. This is Coop. I forced Blaine to give me your number using lots of violence...it's cool though, I think his eye should be fine. Anyways, thx for giving my asshole little brother a chance to at least be your friend. Miss you, Kuuuuuurt.
Kurt smiled at the two messages. For the first time in two years, he felt optimistic about something in his life.