June 1, 2012, 10:40 p.m.
Remember Me, Remember Us: Chapter 10
E - Words: 4,322 - Last Updated: Jun 01, 2012 Story: Complete - Chapters: 22/22 - Created: Jun 01, 2012 - Updated: Jun 01, 2012 234 0 0 0 0
Blaine looked at both Tina and Mike with a combination of shock and awe at what they've just confirmed for him. They knew. They knew all along and never said anything. Why? Was it Blaine who always had feelings for Kurt? Or Kurt who always had feelings for Blaine? Or Both? He had so many questions.
"Blaine! Oh dear, what happened?" Beth came rushing into the choir room and up to the three teens.
"It's nothing. I'm fine, Mom," Blaine explained. He wasn't at all fine, but he was much calmer now that he had something else to focus on.
"What happened? I thought you were going to the bathroom."
"I was," he lied, "but the secretary said she saw Kurt and I wanted to show him that I was out of the house again. Surprise him, kind of. Then people started cornering me all at once, and I couldn't remember how to get back to the office, and I just got really overwhelmed. I'm sorry, Mom."
"Don't throw it away like that," Tina scolded. She looked at Beth. "He was having a panic attack or something when we got to him. And don't believe him when he says that it was nothing. There were a lot of people surrounding and cornering him. Anyone would have reacted the same way with the amount of people clawing at them."
There was a moment of silence in the room because no one knew what to say. "Blaine, come on. Let's go home, Sweetie." Beth gestured to Blaine to come with her.
He looked at all the faces in the room and got up from his chair. Blaine turned around when he got to the door. He wasn't concerned with privacy. Both his mother and Mr. Sheuster were right there beside him "Did you mean what you said? It makes sense?" He asked his two friends.
This time they didn't look at each other. "Yes," they said in unison.
"Where are we going?" Blaine asked after five minutes in the car.
"Home."
"But you said we had errands to run."
"It's fine, Blaine. I can go tomorrow. I'll order take out tonight for dinner and we'll just go home. Besides, you're still going to Kurt's today, right?"
Kurt, Blaine thought. Kurt's arms around him, Photo Kurt's lips on his, naked Dream Kurt with his mouth around him, Kurt in an embrace with the tall blonde; those images ran through his head. "No. I can handle it. Please don't stop your plans because of me." Blaine didn't want to sit alone in his room with the knowledge and temptation of the journal in the drawer. He still wasn't ready to read it.
"Blaine, you had an anxiety attack in a group of people. Don't you think one large group is enough for one day?"
"Mom, please," he begged. He fiddled with his fingers and chewed on his lower lip. He came up with an idea. "You can always drop me off at this little coffee shop in town and come get me when you're finished. It's called the Lima Bean. It's mid-day on a Monday, so it probably won't be crowded and if I can handle the public for a couple hours on my own, then I can be proud of something, right?"
"The Lima Bean?" Beth asked.
"Yeah, it's across the street from a bookstore and next door to that, um, shoe store that I can't remember the name of."
"I know where it is. You and Kurt used to go there almost every day." She smiled then brought her eyebrows together. "How do you know about it?"
Blaine could hear the hint of hope in her voice. He felt bad that he was about to squash it. "Kurt and I went there yesterday. Didn't Dad tell you?"
"No. I guess not." Beth tried hard to hide her slight disappointment. She didn't want Blaine to think she was disappointed in him because she wasn't.
"Please, Mom? I don't want to go home. Not yet." There was a desperation in his voice, though it was quiet.
Beth made a clicking sound as she thought. She clenched her jaw for a moment and finally agreed. She turned the car around and headed back towards town.
When they got to the coffee shop, Beth handed Blaine a twenty dollar bill because that was the only increment she had in money. She also scribbled down her cell number and told him to call her on a pay phone if he needed her or wanted to go home. He thanked her and went inside.
Midday, just past the lunch rush, he was right. Not many people were there. One elderly couple sat by the window doing nothing but looking at each other.
Blaine didn't know how long he would be there so he went over to the magazine rack and picked out two magazines. He thought he heard Kurt mention something about Vogue once and selected that one along with a People magazine. He saw his mother reading it from time to time. He brought the magazines up to the counter and thought for a second when the barista asked if he wanted anything to drink. "What was it Kurt ordered?" he whispered to himself. "Oh! Um, a medium drip and a biscotti, please."
The barista smiled. "Do you go to Dalton?"
"No. Why?"
"Oh. Sorry. They don't have school today. There were a bunch of them in here earlier. I thought maybe you were here for round two."
"Nope. McKinley." Blaine thought it best to just say that's where he went. Technically he did.
"You can sit if you want. No one's here so I can bring you your coffee. Blaine noticed the girl had a goofy grin and sparkly eyes. It made him uncomfortable, but also slightly flattered.
"Thanks." He walked away and sat in the corner of the caf� with his magazines. A few minutes passed and the barista came by with his coffee and biscotti. She also handed him a folded napkin with her number on it. Blaine didn't know what to do, so he just smiled and looked back down to his magazines. About half way through his coffee he was getting more and more annoyed with his Vogue magazine because it seemed that every third page had a tall blonde model and it didn't matter if it were a male or female because all Blaine saw was a tall blonde with his arms around Kurt. His Kurt. But was he? Blaine sighed and flipped the magazine shut. He had just touched the tip of the coffee cup to his lips when he noticed a boy staring at him. I didn't see anyone come in, he thought.
Blaine didn't really know what to do. He felt awkward looking down now because he'd already made eye contact. The boy smiled and showed off a pair of perfect, pearly white teeth. His eyes shimmered and the corners of his eyes squinted a little when he smiled. It was nice. The boy got up and Blaine was able to see how tall he was; and how very thin. He was a brunette with a stylish comb-over. "Hi," he said when he came over.
"H-hello," Blaine greeted tentatively.
"You're not, by any chance, Blaine Anderson, are you?"
"Oh. I, um. Yeah. I am." Blaine wasn't sure why he was stammering to get through a sentence with this boy. "I'm s-sorry I-I don't-"
The tall brunette was able to read something on Blaine's face and interrupted him. "Oh, we don't know each other. I just recognize your face. I know the feeling though. You're talking to someone who you're not sure if you know them or not. That happens to me all the time."
"Um, okay." He laughed. "You have no idea how relieved I am."
"Is this seat taken?"
Blaine smiled and moved his magazines. "No." He gestured to the seat in front of him and the boy sat.
The boy covered his chest with his hand. "Sorry, I'm Sebastian Smyth. I go to Dalton. I'm a Warbler. I saw pictures from last year. That's how I recognized you. It's hard to forget the face of someone who was their fearless leader last year."
"Oh! Okay. I was really starting to wonder how you knew me if we've never met."
Sebastian smiled bigger. "Sorry for pulling the creeper card. You just looked so adorable sitting here and getting madder with each flip of the page that I wanted to cheer you up."
"You saw that?"
"Yeah. Again, sorry."
"No it's okay. Most of the time it's me apologizing anyway, so this is a nice change."
"Now what would you need to apologize for? I thought guys as good looking at you could do no wrong?"
Blaine blushed and grabbed his coffee, pulling it closer to his chest. "Um… I… I don't have the best memory."
"Oh I'm sure whoever it is you're apologizing to doesn't mind, so long as it's you saying it because that means you're in their presence."
Blaine blushed again. "P-please s-stop."
"Why?" Sebastian licked his lips. He wasn't appraising Blaine, or really even hitting on him. Sebastian was doing exactly what he said he came over there to do, make Blaine feel better.
"Because there's only so many things I can do before my face turns completely red and I can't hide that." He looked down into his coffee cup. Blaine wasn't sure why, but he liked Sebastian's attention. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that he wasn't re-meeting Sebastian. He was meeting him for the first time and didn't have any parameters or faults to work around. It was a fresh start. Clearly Sebastian wasn't expecting anything, but a conversation. This is nice, Blaine thought and almost all thoughts of the tall blonde and Kurt in his arms were wiped from Blaine's thoughts for the moment.
Over an hour went by and Blaine barely noticed the time fly. He found it really easy to talk to this Sebastian guy and even opened up about his amnesia a little.
"So, you don't remember anything? Nothing at all?"
Blaine sighed. "No. Not before the accident."
"Is that why you haven't seen your friends at Dalton?"
"Yeah. Actually I'm not even sure they know."
"Do you want to find out?"
"Huh?"
"I mean, like, today. I can bring you to Dalton and we can hang out and you can re-meet the guys. They love you. I'm sure they'd be really happy to see you. I can't imagine how much your friends missed you and might not know why you haven't talked to them."
Blaine started to clam up again. "I-I dunno. I was already at a school of people today and it didn't turn out so well."
"Well, the good news is that you won't be roaming hallways. There's no school, so the guys are all in their dorms. We can hang out in mine and invite a few people over. Very small. I promise."
"Why are you doing this?"
Sebastian made a tick noise with his tongue and teeth. "Because… I don't really want to see you off yet."
Both boys blinked and stared at each other in silence. If Blaine was honest with himself, he didn't really want to go home or be away from Sebastian yet, either. Suddenly Kurt flashed into his mind again. "Um. I kind of already have plans. I'm supposed to have dinner over a friend's house."
"We don't have to stay too long. I can drop you off in time if you want."
Blaine thought for a second. He saw Kurt every day without fail. He wasn't ever given the chance to spend time with other people. He didn't want to go home. The journal was home. Kurt would he there alone with him. He wasn't sure he was ready for that. "I'll have to ask my mom, but sure. I can have dinner at his house some other time."
"Yeah?" Sebastian's face lit up. "Awesome."
It took some convincing, but Beth finally let Blaine go to Dalton with Sebastian on the condition that he was home by eight o'clock.
When Blaine got to Dalton with Sebastian, he put his hood up over his head to burry his face and walked silently. He carefully looked around at his surroundings when people weren't in eye-line. Dalton really was a site to see. It was beautiful in an old architecture kind of way.
Sebastian kept stealing glances back at Blaine and smiling at the look of childlike wonder he held. "Come on, my dorm is this way."
Something about this place made Blaine want to hold someone's hand and run down the hallways or walkways because he just felt happy and free. He pushed the thought from his head because he thought it would be inappropriate to hold Sebastian's hand. He just met him. He felt something similar to when he saw Kurt for the first time, standing in his door way. Like the feeling he gets from being at Dalton, he saw Kurt and felt happy. He did, however, feel it was ironic that on the very day he figures out that he has feelings for a guy, another guy flirts with him with no regard as to what other people might think. Blaine liked Sebastian's confidence and comfortability with himself. He felt that maybe he could learn that from Sebastian. It was already because of Sebastian that he was doing things he hadn't. He normally wanted Kurt by his side because Kurt knew how to handle him, but this was different. It was new and… exciting?
Sebastian lead him into a building named Crathern. He explained that all the Warblers lived here. When they got to a second floor room, Blaine looked around as he took his jacket off. "You live here alone?"
"Yeah," Sebastian answered. "Perk of having rich parents that don't want to listen to me whine about having a room mate. So what do you want to do?" He took Blaine's jacket from him and slung it over his chair.
"I don't know. What do you usually do?"
"Listen to music. Hang out with the guys. Sneak out and go to a bar."
"A bar?"
Sebastian laughed. "Yeah." he scratched his head. "But don't tell anyone. No one knows."
"What kind of bar?"
"The kind where men dance with men and women dance with women." There it was again, his comfortable smile.
"Oh… Can I ask you something?"
"Sure."
"Are you gay?"
Sebastian chuckled again. "Aren't you?"
Blaine just looked back at Sebastian in awe. He'd never thought about it like that. He had feelings for Kurt, he was attracted to Kurt, hell, he found this guy attractive. Did that make him gay? "I-I don't know."
"Oh. I'm sorry. I was flirting with you earlier. Does that bother you? I'll stop." Sebastian really did look concerned.
Blaine thought about it for a second. "N-no." He paused as Sebastian looked at him warily. "No it doesn't bother me. I kind of liked it actually." He was blushing and he tucked his chin into his chest, not being able to look Sebastian in the eyes as he said it. "It was nice. I was flattered."
"Okay then." He continued to smile and went over to his bookshelf. He pulled out a yearbook from the previous year and started flipping the pages. He stopped at the picture of last year's Warblers and turned the book around toward Blaine. "Do you know any of these guys?"
Blaine took the book and recognized the picture. He had the same one in the album Kurt, Mike, and Tina made him. "Kurt must have cut this picture out of his own album. That's him." He put his finger just under Kurt's face and Sebastian looked over his shoulder.
"He's cute. Not my type, but cute."
Blaine wanted to chuckle a little, but didn't. "He's really selfless and sweet. I yell at him too much, but he just let's me do it." There was a few moments of silence and Blaine looked over at Sebastian who was eying him curiously. "What?"
"Nothing. Just the way you talk about him. I would guess you have feelings for him."
Blaine pursed his lips and bit them into a flat line. "We're close," he said dismissively. "He's been a great help through all of this. I think he might be with somebody though."
"Is he gay?"
"I don't know. I mean, I think so, but the topic has never come up. Although, today I saw him talking to this other guy and he was standing uncomfortably close to Kurt, then pulled him into a hug. More than that. I wouldn't say it was a hug. Um, embrace, maybe?"
Sebastian waltzed over to his bed and sat down on it. "I'm gonna go out on a limb and say he's capital G, but my apologies if he isn't." He patted the bed next to him and gestured for Blaine to sit.
"Capital G?" Blaine asked as he sat down next to Sebastian.
Sebastian let out the tiniest of laughs. "Sorry. New lingo. Capital G-gay. Like, sort of a stereotype. You know, kind of feminine, artsy, emotional, stuff like that."
Blaine turned back to the picture. He pointed to an Asian boy. "Wes. I know his name by face."
"Wes graduated last year. He's not here."
"Oh. Um…" He looked back to the book and started trying to rack his brain for other names.
Sebastian got up and grabbed two magazines from his desk. He opened each to a random page and sat back down with Blaine. "Can I ask you a question? I kind of want to help you with your confusion."
"Confusion?"
"You're glossing over the questions on whether you're gay or if you have feelings for this Kurt person. I don't know if that's you're way of telling me you don't want to talk about it, or if you're insecure and really are confused."
"Well, it's still a new thought to me, but my mother said that if I were, it would be okay with the whole family."
"Okay, well that right there tells me that she already knows."
"I thought so too."
"Is it okay that I'm talking to you like this? I know we just met and all."
"No, it's fine. It's refreshing actually. You're easy to talk to."
Sebastian flashed him another smile. "Good. I like talking to you. Here." He showed him the two pictures of the magazines. One was of a gorgeous model in a bikini. The other was of a male model in board shorts on a surfboard. "Which one are you attracted to?"
Blaine looked at the glossy magazine paper and answered, "They're both attractive. They're models, Sebastian."
"Okay, yeah, but which one would you sleep with?"
"Neither. I don't know them."
Sebastian laughed out loud. "Blaine, you're funny." He closed the magazines and put them on the other side of the bed. "Okay, how about me? If I wanted to, would you let me kiss you?"
Blaine tensed up immediately. His eyes went wide and he blushed again. "I-I…"
Sebastian saw Blaine's demeanor and laughed again, this time clutching his stomach, "Relax, I'm not going to kiss you. It was just to make a point."
"Oh!" Blaine let out a long breath. "Thank god. I mean- not that you're not handsome. I mean, you are handsome- I just- I'm not- I don't-" Blaine mumbled quickly.
"You don't have to let me down gently, Blaine." He laughed some more. "I wasn't propositioning you. What if I didn't want to kiss you anyway?"
"You don't?" Blaine was asking merely for clarity, but Sebastian read it as something else.
"Well, I will if you want me to. Your whole bashful schoolboy thing is super hot."
Blaine blushed again. Something about Sebastian was having an insane effect on him blushing. He felt he'd done that nearly a hundred times in the past couple hours. "I've never told another guy that he was handsome."
Sebastian gave Blaine a look that sent butterflies in Blaine's stomach. He felt he could get used to Sebastian's attention. There was a knock on the door. "Come in!" Sebastian yelled.
The door opened and a boy with a distinguished voice and skin the color of chocolate was standing in the doorway. His smile was just as sweet as the color of his skin. "Hey Sebastian, we're going to be playing Halo in my room if you want to join- Blaine?"
Blaine looked at the boy and a name popped into his head. He remembered him from the photo. He stood to the left of Wes. "David?"
"Wow. James said that he saw you, but I almost didn't believe it." Blaine shifted his eyes back and forth, not really knowing what he was supposed to do or say. "Sorry, dude. Hey," he walked up to him and held his hand out, "David," he introduced himself even though Blaine already stated his name. Blaine shook it. "Man, it is so good to see you again. Wes is going to be so happy to hear you're doin' all right."
"Wes…?" Blaine thought as he spoke. "You and Wes were the head council members and my best friends."
"Yeah." Blaine recognized the hope in David's voice. He had the familiar wishful thinking that his parents had. He was hoping Blaine knew that because he remembered.
"I don't remember. I was just told that."
"It's cool. No worries, man."
"Sorry."
"No. No apology necessary. It's no worries, Blaine. I don't care if you remember me or not. I'm just happy that you're here. Me and the guys miss you like mad crazy. This guy's a good singer and all," David gestured to Sebastian, "but no one's got a voice like you."
Blaine was taken aback. He can see why Wes was a good friend of his. Wes was the first person who was overly enthused to see him and Blaine actually believed him when Wes said he didn't care if he remembered him or not. This was a first. These Dalton guys are something else, Blaine thought. They were so comfortable to be around.
"You guys wanna come play Halo? We've got snacks and stuff and we're just going to set up and play and eat junk."
"We?" Sebastian asked for Blaine.
"Mark, Nick, Jeff, Brad, and Matt."
Nick and Jeff rang a bell to Blaine, but he also remembered always getting to two confused. One was a tall, skinny, blonde and the other was a short, muscular, brunette. Kurt referred to them as Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum because they were always attached at the hip. Sebastian looked to Blaine to see what he wanted and Blaine didn't know of any reason not to go with David.
Three o'clock on the dot came and Kurt was ringing the doorbell at the Anderson house. Kurt was startled to see Beth answer the door because Blaine was the one to greet him every day. "Hi," he said. "Is he ready to go?"
"Oh. Sweetie, you didn't get my voicemail."
Kurt took out his phone and sure enough he saw the little icon that told he him he had a message. "No. Sorry. Is everything okay?"
"Honey, Blaine's not here."
Kurt cocked his head to the side. "He's not? Where is he? Tina said he had an incident at McKinley today."
"He did. He's fine now, I guess. He met a boy at the Lima Bean and wanted to hang out with him instead of going to your house today. I'm sorry."
"Who was it? Do you know?"
"No, but he went to Dalton. That's where he is now. Some boy named Sebastian took him. He was going to show him around the school and introduce him to some of his old friends."
"Sebastian? I don't know him." Kurt couldn't help, but think that if Henry were the one with Blaine today, he would never have let Blaine go alone.
"Yes, he said that he was new this year, but knew all about Blaine through the Warblers. He was sweet."
Kurt looked both concerned and disappointed. He was looking forward to bringing Kurt around to his house. "Okay. Um, I'll just come by tomorrow then." The more it set in, the more saddened he was that Blaine chose strangers over him. Maybe we didn't leave things as comfortable as I thought yesterday. I was supposed to be the one to take him to Dalton when he was ready. He also wondered who Sebastian was and what made him want to be around him more. "Here's his homework." He handed Beth Blaine's small stack of work.
"Kurt, why don't you call one of your friends at Dalton and go hang out there? I'd feel more comfortable if you were there with him anyway."
Kurt sighed. He didn't really want to go to Dalton, but he really wanted to make sure Blaine was okay. He could call David because he still had his number and he did tell him a while back about Blaine. Not the whole story, but enough. Maybe David would be cool with him tagging along. "Sure. I'll call David."
"Okay. I'm sorry, Sweetie."
"It's okay. It's what he wanted, right?"
Kurt called David while he was on his way back to his car. "Hey, David."
"Kurt! Hey, man! What's up?"
"Uh, Blaine's at Dalton. Have you seen him?"
"Yeah actually. He's right here. He's playing Halo with a group of us." Kurt thought he heard Blaine's voice in the background saying something to the effect of 'and owning all of you at this game." There was laughter and some other voices saying things he couldn't decipher.
"Oh good. Um, listen, this is going to sound weird, but can I come over and hang too? His mother wants me to be there for him if he gets too overwhelmed or whatever." He was trying to make it sound like it was all Blaine's mother's doing and his over-protectiveness wasn't his, it was Beth's.
Kurt heard a soft whisper, like David took the phone away from his ear and asked the rest of the room if no one cared whether or not Kurt was there. When he heard Blaine's voice he understood that David was really asking only Blaine. "My mom probably asked him to come. If it's okay with you, it's okay with me." He smiled a little when he heard two other voices saying "Dude, I miss that kid. Kurt come over!"
Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum, Kurt laughed in his head.
"Yeah, sure, man. Come on over. We're all in my room. You remember where it is, right?"
"Yes. Cool. All right, I'll be there in a bit."