July 20, 2012, 8:51 a.m.
Did You Miss Me: Chapter 3
M - Words: 2,303 - Last Updated: Jul 20, 2012 Story: Complete - Chapters: 11/11 - Created: Jun 10, 2012 - Updated: Jul 20, 2012 387 0 0 0 0
~Marcus Aurelius~
Kurt was stunning and Blaine was stunned. If he thought this young man was beautiful while he was talking, it was nothing compared to him when he sang.
Yeah I, tell you something
I think you’ll understand
When I, say that something
I wanna hold your hand
Blaine didn’t realize he had started moving forward until he was face to face with Kurt. He let his eyes roam over his face. His skin was pale and perfect. His eyes overflowed with tears and emotion. It was obvious to Blaine that this song had meaning beyond just being an audition piece. No one sings a song like that unless they can feel it to their core. And his lips… his lips were quivering slightly. If this were a scene from a movie this would be when the protagonist would lay a finger on those glistening pink lips. He would whisper a, ‘Shhh everything will be alright. As long as we’re together everything will be fine.’ Then there would be a kiss. But this wasn’t the movies and Blaine certainly didn’t feel like the hero.
Oh please, say to me
You’ll let me be your man
And please, say to me
You’ll let me hold your hand
Blaine’s hand was growing warm. He glanced down and saw that his fingers were loosely entwined with Kurt’s. When the end of the song neared he felt his grip growing tighter and tighter. As the last note echoed in the room, he found he needed a breath and inhaled quickly. He dropped Kurt’s hand and stepped back.
“Kurt that was … gay.” It was only when he saw Kurt’s eyes grow large and slightly pained that Blaine realized what he had said.
“What?”
“No Kurt! Me! I meant me. I’m gay too, I just wanted you to know. There seemed to be a lot of pain and emotion while you sang. I was just thinking that if that were the reason, you know, being gay? If that was the reason then you should know that you’re not alone and it gets better.” Blaine turned around and cringed. ‘Jeez Blaine!’ He admonished himself mentally. ‘Are there anymore PSA‘s you could have thrown at him?’ This guy got to him more than anyone ever had before. He took a deep breath before turning around.
“Kurt that was great. Really great. I think you would make a fantastic addition to the New Directions.” He hoped his smiled looked genuine and not deranged. He placed his hands on Kurt’s shoulder and turned him toward the door. As he continued to speak, he began to gently guide him out of the room. “So, you have a great evening and I’ll see you tomorrow!”
“Oh, well thank you Mr. Anderson but I wanted to tell you…”
With one more gentle push, Kurt was out of the room. Blaine closed the door and leaned against it. He let his head fall back and squeezed his eyes shut. He brought his hands up and pressed them into his forehead. If he were trying to keep his thoughts contained inside the deep recesses of his brain it wasn’t working.
He had to know this guy! Had to. The feeling was overwhelming. Like his entire life up until now had led to today. Had led to a meeting with Kurt Hummel. Blaine just didn’t know whether Kurt would want to know him if he knew the truth. The truth. Blaine let himself slide down until he came to rest on the floor. The truth…
~~~~~~~~~~~~
One day earlier:
“I thought I might find you here.”
Blaine looked up to see his father enter the senior commons. “Hello Principal Anderson, Warbler practice ended about twenty minutes ago. I thought I would catch up on some homework.”
“Blaine it’s just the two of us. You are allowed to call me Dad.”
Blaine just smiled and nodded just as he had done a hundred times before. It was a game they played and Blaine was so sick of it. “Yes sir.”
“Blaine I don’t understand why you spend so much time here. You have not attended Dalton for a year. And yet, I find you here everyday.”
“I just can’t bail on the Warblers! Those guys are my friends.” He regretted it as soon as he’d said it. He winced when his father shook his head and sat down across from him.
“Blaine how many times have we had this conversation? You need to move on! Your high school glory days are over. You’re nineteen and in college, go find a life in that circle. I thought you decided to give up on the musical pipe dream and dedicate yourself to becoming a teacher?”
“You decided.”
“What did you say?”
“You decided that I should become a teacher. You decided that I should follow in your footsteps. You used to ask me what I wanted to do when I grew up. The second Cooper left for Hollywood you stopped asking and started telling me instead.”
“Stop! I told you when you graduated that if you wanted to follow your dreams to New York then you were welcome to pay for it yourself. You made the decision to stay! Now, I need you to stop wallowing and get on with your life.”
“I miss the music.” Blaine pushed away from the table and began pacing. “I miss performing Dad! That’s why I hang out around here. Can’t you just let me have this? I was the lead soloist here for three years. I can help if you let me.”
“Sit down Blaine.”
He sat down across from his father and steeled himself for the yelling. He met his fathers gaze and waited. He stood, pulled a piece of paper from his breast pocket and threw it on the table.
“There, you miss being around performers so badly? Go and watch them perform.”
Blaine reached out and picked up the paper. “The New Directions from McKinley?’
“They are the Warblers biggest competition for regional’s this year.”
“You want me to spy?”
“You want to help so badly then stop whining and help.”
Blaine watched his father walk out of the room and turned his attention back to the paper in his hand.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
He was the worst spy to ever walk the earth. The second he stepped foot inside McKinley High School everything that could go wrong, had. The crazy thing was he didn’t come to spy. He had decided when he woke that morning that he would do the gentlemanly thing. He would go to McKinley and find out when the next public performance would be. He would then take that information back to his father and tell him he could do his spying himself. But the second the words ’glee club’ had left his mouth he was swept up in a whirlwind of misunderstandings. The principal, a man named Figgins had assumed he was the substitute and shoved him out of his office. Blaine was sure there had to be paper work and procedures involved in that kind of thing but he didn’t know what they were. Obviously neither did Principal Figgins. He’d almost made it out the door when he saw him. Kurt. Kurt with blue eyes that could, he was pretty sure, make him do whatever he wanted.
Blaine grinned at the thought. He could just imagine the power Kurt could wield. Standing on the stairs looking up at him, he made the decision to keep the lie going for just a little while. He would spend an hour with Kurt then he would leave and never come back.
Just an hour as someone else. Someone that he used to be and could barely remember. The second those eyes met his all he wanted to do was sing and dance. He felt so good, so strong with those eyes watching his every move today. He felt like he could do anything if he knew he had Kurt to impress. By the time the hour was over Blaine knew it wasn‘t enough time. While watching Kurt sing he realized that there would never be enough time to spend with Kurt Hummel. “Yes Blaine“, he said to the empty choir room, “the same Kurt you just shoved out the door. Crap!” Blaine pushed himself up and off the floor and bolted out the door. He was determined to catch him before he got to far away.
Blaine flew out of the choir room and came face to face with Kurt, literally. He couldn’t come to a stop before he slammed into him and sent them both careening off kilter slamming them both into the lockers. Trying to right themselves to keep from falling to the floor, they became a tangle of limbs. He felt a hand clutch at his shoulder and one gripping at his back. With one hand, he clutched at the front of Kurt’s shirt and the other came around the back of his head clutching at his neck.
When they came to a stop Blaine saw that he basically had Kurt pressed up against a locker. He backed up enough to look into his eyes. The shocked expression he found there, he was sure, matched his own. As they stood and stared Kurt’s widened eyes soon began to narrow and the corners of his mouth lifted upwards. After a beat or two, he threw his head back against the locker and let out wild and high-pitched laugh. It was the most glorious sound Blaine had ever witnessed. He matched Kurt’s laugh with one of his own.
He reluctantly pulled himself away and started to straighten Kurt’s vest. “I am so sorry!”
“Don’t worry about it. Believe me, it’s not the first time I have been thrown into a locker. But that was definitely the first time it was actually fun.” They stood grinning goofily at each other.
Words started to permeate Blaine’s thoughts and every one of them made his smile fade away bit by bit. High. School. Student. Teacher. Liar. However, it was the next two words that came to mind that kept him from running away. The One.
“How old are you Kurt?”
Kurt started a bit as if surprised by the question. “What? Oh! It’s legal. I meant I’m legal. I can even vote.”
Blaine once read a book with the line, ‘A pink flush was painted on their visage by embarrassment’s artist brush’. He giggled for an hour over that one. It also got him wondering about blushing. He would often hear people say things like, ‘now you’re going to make me blush’, but he never really noticed a change. Maybe he just wasn’t observant enough. Now with Kurt standing and sputtering in front of him? He finally witnessed it. From the top of those cheek bones that could cut glass, right down to the jaw line that any model would admire. He went from pale and porcelain to painted pink by ‘embarrassments’ brush’, in a matter of seconds. Kurt wore his feelings right on his face. He so admired him for it. Blaine always felt so guarded. He didn’t want to feel that way around this young man.
“Good. I’m really glad to know that Kurt. Because, ahh, voting is our civic duty.”
Kurt’s giggle was interrupted by a buzz from his pocket. He pulled out his phone and sighed loudly.
“Bad news?” Blaine asked
“No, just an annoyance.” Kurt said with a lopsided grin. “Well Mr. Anderson, this was fun.” He said grinning as he motioned with his hand to indicate the lockers behind him. “But I really need to go.”
“Of course, I’ll walk you out Kurt. And it’s Blaine not Mr. Anderson.”
They walked through the empty hallway in silence. When they were outside and standing by Kurt’s car Blaine started to panic. He knew he couldn’t come back to this school tomorrow. It was only a matter of time before the school officials found him out. Or even worse, his father.
“Kurt, I might not be here tomorrow. As a substitute you never really know from day to day what will happen. So just in case I never see you again I just wanted to tell you that you really will make a wonderful addition to the Glee club here. That voice of yours needs to be shared with the world.” Blaine could feel that embarrassing paint brush going to town on his cheeks. “That sounded really corny I know, but it’s the truth. Promise me that you will keep singing.”
Kurt’s voice was just a whisper when he spoke. “Thank you. You really can’t know how much that means to me. You are a very nice man Mr. Blaine Anderson.”
Blaine held his breath as Kurt’s hand reached out to him. His long slender fingers wrapped around his bow tie and gave a little tug. Then he smiled turned away and got into his car. Blaine felt like crying as the car started to pull away. This would be the last time he ever saw Kurt Hummel. His brain started screaming at him to, ‘Go get him idiot! Don’t let him get away!’ He was running before logic could catch up with him. He threw himself at the car which screeched to a halt. He tapped on the window until Kurt rolled it down.
“Coffee!”
“What?”
“This was your first day so I thought to myself, self, Kurt probably doesn’t know where to get good coffee. So I thought I should tell you that there is a place called the Lima Bean that’s really great. I go there everyday around seven in the morning. That’s all. Have a great night!” Blaine turned and had to hold himself back to keep from running to his car. He got in buckled up turned on the engine and only then did he let himself look in the rearview mirror. The smile on Kurt’s face was almost as big as the one now on Blaine‘s.