Oct. 27, 2012, 4:55 a.m.
Love in no man's land: It was only a matter of time
M - Words: 2,496 - Last Updated: Oct 27, 2012 Story: Closed - Chapters: 3/? - Created: Jul 01, 2012 - Updated: Oct 27, 2012 272 0 1 0 0
"Get the hell away from me!" I screamed mercilessly at him. He turned to face me, tears streaking down his cheeks making his eyes red and puffy. I'd had enough of this for too long, the constant buzzing of his phone. From him. Peter was for the most parts, the best boyfriend i'd ever had. But it was the sixth sense I've had enough of, telling me something wasn't right. Peter had a friend, or so he told me but I could see past the glances when he was hanging around with us. His name was jamie, he was in the same business as Peter, a chef at one of those big fancy resturants. That gave him more time with Peter, and if that wasn't enough I would be gone for months at a time. Leaving Peter alone with Jamie in the same town.
It was when I came home from training early to find Peter's phone buzzing manicaly in the front room. I couldn't exactly ignore the constant annoyance, so I clicked open the message to find 13 unread messages all from Jamie. hey sexy, How about tonight, isn't Kurt training later? Come round mine at 6, I'll cook Hunny just text me x. They were all the same, they were the kind of texts Kurt sent Peter, the ones you send when you've been going out for ever and the phase of compliments had passed. These texts were Jamie asking Peter out, like he was his boyfriend.
At first I was fuming, raging with anger. The feeling I first felt was pure angst, I felt like taking both of their necks together in my shaking hands and snapping them like twigs. Hearing their screams would have comforted me, I was that angry. Then the violent feeling left and was replaced with only sadness, my insides burnt with grief and hummiliation. My heart ached after a while, from the streams of tears running down my blotchy face. By the time Peter arrived from the shops there was nothing left to let fall, I felt empty and worthless. Seeing his face made my stomach twist. But then again, I saw it coming from the moment I layed eyes on Jamie, he took an interest in Peter, not obvious flirting, but the way he stared at Peter made me shift uncomfortably.
I heard the door open and slam, the keys scrapped on the china key dish in the hall way, I stood waiting for the lounge door to open, my whole body shaking uncontrollably with nerves. I took a deep breath in as the handle twisted, my breath hitched when I saw him. After I knew his dirty little secret, I couldn't stop from seeing him as this evil creature that lied to me, day in and day out.
"Kurt?" He gasped once he saw what sort of state I was in. His eyes filled with concearn and confusion. All I wanted to do was fall tierlessly into his studry arms and let him rock me until I fell asleep, but I couldn't, I had to keep face facts, even after 3 years of living together, he still turned out to be a liar.
He watched me, soundlessly, as I took his phone from my jeans pocket. His eyes darted to the object and straight back into mine. His green eyes turned almost yellow as realisation flashed across his face. I stood still, looking deep into his eyes but all he did was stare back. Probably too ashamed to try and defend himself.
"He wants to see you tonight since I'm training late tonight" I told him, I kept my voice low and confident as much as I could. His gaze still locked on mine.
"Kurt I...I'm sorry" His voice was just as shakey as mine had been, only he looked almost sick. He stared down at his hands, his head low, muttering something under his breath. "I'm so sorry Kurt" His voice sounded sincere, but I'd learnt over the years not to be fooled by such an act as this.
"I can't" I whispered, not making much sense to Peter or myself right now. "I can't trust you anymore. I thought you were someone who loved me and only me" I started, my voice higher and weaker than before. I was about to cry, but I didn't.
"Kurt I do love you, It's just, I get so lonely without you" He replied walking closer to me. I backed away and put his phone gently down on the table.
"Just the thought of me coming home should have been enough Pete. Not sleeping with some cheep whore from pub" I argued, using all the strength I could muster. Peter was unmoved with what I called Jamie, He could tell I was pissed, and to be fair he had no right to tell me to not call him that.
Peter looked sadly at me, knowing that there was nothing he could do or say. "Kurt, I'm sorry. I really am but this relationship was a struggle for me and you knew that. It was about time that I did what I did" Peter knew that what he said was in no way true, feeling ashamed as soon as the words left his mouth.
"ABOUT TIME?" I shreiked unconvinced at his attempt to plead innocence. "you cheated on me Peter, you must have slept with him many I time. and while I was out there fighting for humanity" Peter looked away from me, threading his finger threw his hair "Your just sick!" I spat as I crossed his path to the door. He grabbed for my arm but I yanked it back, feeling a sharp pain in my joints.
"Get the hell away from me!" I screamed. He let me go but not before placing a gold ring in my hand. It was a promise ring I gave him 4 years ago, he gave me one too.
"I broke my promise so you get to keep it. Give it to someone who is stronger than me." Peter instructed looking deep into my eyes. I gave him a weak smile before leaving the apartment. To be honest he was right about a lot of things in there; It's hard to be in a relationship when you spend months at a time without them, especialy if one of them is so weak minded to even wait a few more weeks until they come home. Kurt had always be faithful, since you weren't aloud to be gay in the army in case you get to attached to another soldier. Kurt had lied to join up to fight along side his brother, something Peter would never have the guts to do.
I wandered the streets of Ohio aimlessly, looking into darkened shop windows and small cafe shops with waitresses cleaning tables. I breathed in the smell of the quite night trying to reasemble my thoughts. I could always see Finn, or Puck? In the end I decided to go to Puck's since he doesnt ask a lot of questions. As I got to his front door I heard the loud laughing from a few of Puck's new female friends. A smile spread across my lips as I knew that this was going to be one of the things Puck would get me back for. He would hate him for barging in on him when there was a possibility for sex. But Kurt was desperate and right now this was the only solution.
"Kurt, hi" Puck stared at me, confused to see me on his doorstep. Inside were two very pretty looking blond girls and Finn. Just my luck! Puck noticed the small smile and moved to let me in, Finn stared at me with concearned eyes as I slumped down into a brown sofa chair.
"Hi, I hope you don't mind me coming unannounced It's just..." I started, unable to finish. Puck seemed to understand, seeing the look of desperation and sadness on my face. Finn was as clueless as ever, as he carried on playing the video game he was in the middle of.
"I see you never get out of the old video game habit" I snorted, Finn looking over and offering me a chuckle of amusement.
"Seriously what's wrong dude?" Puck whispered gesturing me to walk with him into the kitchen. I obliged and lent against the cooker as he studied me from on top of the kitchen counter top. His eyes servayed mine, looking for an answer he knew he would eventually get. I breathed in before explaining.
"Peter cheated on me, so I left the apartment" I said bluntly, Puck's face flashed with several emotions. Confusion, anger and then worry. After a while of silence I started again. "Is it okay if I stay here for a bit, I knew you wouldn't ask as many questions as anyone else?" I asked hesitantly. Puck smiled and managed a small nod before handing me a beer from the frigde. I loved that Puck didn't pry when something was troubling you. He didn't ignore you, he just knew that people will tell you in their own good time. It was nice to have a person like that in your life, someone who gives you comfort without actually saying anything.
"stay here as long as you want" he finally said as we made our way back into the lounge. Finn's eyes were still glued to the tv screen and the two girls sat giggling together in the corner.
"Time to go girlies, and Finn" Puck ordered turning of the tv. Finn shot him a death glare but it softened when his eyes met with mine. A smile played at my lips as he saw how happy Finn looked to see me. I looked down at his hands, the small smile on my lips fading. Finn noticed this and walked across the room to my side.
"Kurt what's wrong?" Finn asked once the girls had left laughing out the door. I shrugged nervously, trying to make it seem like there was nothing wrong, but there was. Luckily for me Finn dropped the subject and took to the hallways grabbing his coat from the sofa on his way. Finn said his goodbyes and told me to call me whenever he felt the need. I agreed and sunk into the couch, melting into the feeling. Puck smiled as he saw me relaxed for once. I guess I was always on edge whenever I was with Peter, I probably always knew that this would happen and nervous to know when it would. I had the rest of the week off before going back to Afghanistan with Finn.
"You want anything?" Puck asked me after he fixed himself a strange looking sandwich. I shook my head my eyes fluttering closed. After that Puck had left me to be, I eventually found the strength to make a basic omlet and cried myself to sleep that night. The idea of living from door to door made my cry even harder, I felt embaressed at the situation I found myself in. All I could do was blame someone or something, so I ended up muttering curses about Jamie and his sly ways, getting my boyf-ex boyfriend into bed with him. Peter probably has caught some disease and will get aids and die, that would free me of a lot of stress. I would get the apartment to myself, not that I want Peter to die, no. I want Jamie to die. But for know I'll just let Karma work it's magic and give him what he deserves.
As the days passed me and Puck gradually got a little bit closer than before. He was always home before me and had started cooking dinner, we were like an old married couple. But the fact I had no attraction to him at all and that Puck was gay kind of ruined the whole idea.
"You should try online dating!" Puck exclaimed one day as I sat down at the dining room table. A stared at him, a bemused smile on my lips as I tried to hold back the laughs. "I'm serious, Rachel and Finn tried it and they found someone they actually liked!" Puck tried to argue. After thinking on the idea for a bit I warmed up to the idea. Puck had chosen the site, match as a suitable website.
I smiled into the camera peice as the small camera on Puck's laptop took a photo of him for his profile. I had listed all the things he enjoyed doing, reluctantly not putting that I was in the army. That might get back to the squad leader and get me kicked out.
"alright so, click here to find your ideal boyfriend" Puck said, reading the screen aloud. The site had been made for non homophobic people, just incase things got out of hand. Puck clicked the botton to find 24 matches. I smiled at the screen, a smile squeal of excitement escaping his lips. Puck laughed as he scrolled down the list of men to find someone that I liked the look of.
"him" I said pointing to the screen. There was a tiny dark image of a man said to be 25, my age. He was into music and broadway an ideal guy for me. His profile picture was too fuzzy to make out so he clicked to enlarge. The image was of a dark haired man with small curls, making him look as adorable as a little puppy. My heart melted as the hair reminded him of the dog I had as a kid. His name was barker as I didn't have an amazing creativity level.
The name of the guy was Blaine, you weren't aloud to list your second name. Which I found amusing as In our Squad we were only adressed by our last names, never saying the others first name. It was one of the rules they had enforced, another attempt at not letting people get too attached to others.
I glanced at his profile, Puck watched me as my face lit up with hope and happiness. "I'm going to email him!" I chirped clicking the contact button. I thought for ages to try and think of what to say. After an hour or so I finally clicked send.
To Blaine,
Hi my names Kurt and I'm pretty new to this online dating thing. I saw your profile and noticed that you have 'broadway' listed as one of the things you like. I love broadway! what's your favourite show?
from Kurt :)
I hoped that the email was ok, I had no idea what people normally say when they first introduce themselves to another member. I took a deep breath and smiled at the computer screen. I closed it down and retired to my bedroom. Still smiling as I finally felt myself drift off into sleep, my thoughts only about this 'Blaine' and if he would reply to my email and what it would feel like to run my fingers through his curly hair. I wonder.
Comments
This is such an amazing plot, I can't wait until Kurt get's a reply from Blaine. So from the front cover I get the feeling Blaine is in the army. Am I right!?