Chapter Eight: Original Song

When Blaine burst into the choir room singing “Mercy”, Kurt wasn’t surprised. He was well acquainted with Blaine’s impromptu performances, and he enjoyed them. He enjoyed any chance he could listen to Blaine sing. But the way the Warblers instantly jumped in to sing background bothered Kurt.

When the song ended and Blaine approached him, Kurt tried to hide his feelings. He didn’t want to hurt Blaine’s feelings, but he knew he couldn’t lie to him when he outright asked Kurt what he thought about the song.

“I think you’re amazing, Blaine. It isn’t surprising that everyone else notices it too, but you get every solo. I don’t see why there are even tryouts for them.” Kurt hoped he had spared Blaine’s feelings. He really did think the boy was remarkable. Anyone who looked at Blaine and didn’t see that was blind.

“Kurt, you know the council decides who gets the solos. Do I detect a little jealousy?” Blaine raised an eyebrow, not believing what Kurt was saying.

“No, you detect a lot of jealousy.” Kurt paused to gather his thoughts. “When I was in the New Directions, I was always in the background, backing for Rachel and Finn. I don’t feel like that’s changed since I came here. It feels like the Warblers are more like Blaine and the Pips than a group.”

Kurt spun on the balls of his feet and strode away. He couldn’t believe he had just said that to Blaine. Admitting his jealousy was crazy. Surely Blaine thought he was selfish now. Why couldn’t he just lie to Blaine? But Kurt could never lie to him. And now Blaine knew just how imperfect Kurt was.

Kurt hurried to his dorm room, glad it was close by. He dropped his bag on the ground by the door, locking it behind him. He went into his bathroom and found his razor. Why couldn’t he just be perfect? Why was perfection always so far out of his grasp? It was so easy for Blaine.

He pulled his sleeve up, sliding the blade against the skin there. As the blade sliced into his flesh, blood bubbled out. Kurt sighed in relief. He deepened the cut, making sure that he didn’t go too deep. Then he angled his arm downward, watching as the blood flowed down his arm to his hand, running over the crease in his hand. He stood transfixed, watching his blood flow at his own hands.

A knock came at the door. Kurt jumped, wiping the blood off of his wrist and hand with a towel. He turned the water on so the blood in the sink would wash away.

“Just a minute!” he called. Somehow, he knew it was Blaine. Kurt grabbed his ace bandage and wrapped it tightly around his wrist. He hid the towel carefully before he opened the door to greet Blaine.

“Hey, ready to go down to dinner?” Blaine asked, smiling.

“Sure.” Kurt couldn’t help but smile back at him. He closed and locked the door behind him.� Kurt was glad Blaine didn’t ask why it had taken him so long to open the door. That would only lead to more awkward questions. His secret was safe.

K/B

Blaine was worried when Kurt didn’t show for the Warblers meeting. He sent Kurt a text, but didn’t receive an answer. He shrugged it off. Kurt had been so tired lately; he had probably fallen asleep and forgotten about the meeting. When Wes called the meeting to order, Blaine brought up the topic of the uniforms they would wear for regionals. They always wore their Dalton uniforms; he thought they should spice it up for something as big as regionals.

Not one person seemed to agree with Blaine. He knew Kurt would. He was just about to text him again when the countertenor strode through the door. He was out of uniform, dressed all in black, and his eyes were red from crying.

“Kurt, what’s wrong?” Blaine asked, getting to his feet. He took two steps towards the boy but Kurt raised his hand, stopping him.

“Pavarotti is dead.” Kurt heard the words leave his mouth, but he still couldn’t believe it was true. He couldn’t help but feel responsible as the canary had been put in his care. Kurt couldn’t even take care of a bird without messing it up.

“I’m so sorry.” Blaine wanted to reach out and hug the boy, but he knew by Kurt’s demeanor that he wouldn’t accept it. Instead, Blaine sat back on the couch, letting Kurt have the spotlight.

“I want to sing a song in his memory.” Kurt handed a tape to Trent. The introduction to “Blackbird” began. Kurt took a deep breath before he began to sing.

Blackbird singing in the dead of night,

Take these broken wings and learn to fly.

All your life,

You were only waiting for this moment to arise.

Kurt wasn’t surprised when the Warblers began to sing backup, but he was surprised that Blaine had led them into doing so. He turned to look at his friend with grateful eyes. He was surprised to see how upset his friend looked. Pavarotti had been Kurt’s bird, his friend even. It made sense for Kurt to be upset over his passing, but not Blaine.

Blackbird singing in the dead of night,

Take these sunken eyes and learn to see.

All your life,

You were only waiting for this moment to be free.

Blackbird fly, blackbird fly,

Into the light of the dark black night.

Kurt walked in a slow circle around the room. He could feel Blaine’s eyes on him, so he turned. What he saw in his best friend’s eyes shocked Kurt. There was so much love in his eyes, that Kurt could only think that he had imagined it. He looked away quickly, but couldn’t help looking back. There it was again. That same look, filled with love and compassion. Indeed, it seemed Blaine had ceased singing as the overwhelming emotions poured into his heart.

Blaine was seeing Kurt as he had never seen him before. Of course there had been moments before when Blaine thought he might have feelings for the boy, but never feelings this strong. He felt like he was looking at the missing link of himself, watching Kurt sing a song to mourn the loss of his animal friend. Instantly, Blaine knew he had to do something. He had to show Kurt how he felt.

Blackbird fly, blackbird fly,

Into the light of the dark black night.

You were only waiting for this moment to arise.

You were only waiting for this moment to arise.

“Thank you,” Kurt said as the song ended. He felt alone now more than ever. He had to get away from everyone and back to the safety of his room.

And that was what he did, fleeing the room before anyone could stop him. Kurt practically ran back to his dorm. He locked the door the instant he was in the room, not wanting anyone to interrupt him. Even the smallest death reminded Kurt of his mother’s. He missed her so much. She had been his best friend.

Kurt felt like a knife had been twisted in his heart, slowly pushing in further and further until the pain consumed him. He wished he was at McKinley. There he had friends who would hold him and pat him on the back, telling him it would be okay. He knew if he were to go to Blaine he would do the same for Kurt, but Kurt felt like he was burdening the boy enough as it were. Instead, Kurt turned to the only friend he had left:� his razorblade.

K/B

Kurt couldn’t believe the latest turn of events. Blaine had turned down the chance to sing a solo at regionals, instead opting to sing a duet. A duet with Kurt. He didn’t know why Blaine had chosen him, and the answers that came to mind did nothing to make Kurt feel any better. Surely, Blaine chose him out of pity. Poor motherless Kurt who cries when a bird dies because it reminds him of his mother. He was pathetic. And his jealousy had been pathetic.

Kurt focused his attentions on making Pavarotti’s casket as beautiful as his voice had been. He glued another rhinestone to the top, looking up when Blaine entered the room. He pushed all the negative thoughts out of his mind.

“I wanted to propose a song for our duet,” Blaine told him, sitting down.

“Do tell.” Kurt put the glue gun aside.

“’Candles’ by Hey Monday.” Blaine looked like he wanted to say something else, but didn’t.

“I’m impressed,” Kurt teased. “You normally stick with songs off the Top 40s list.”

“Yes, well, I wanted something a bit more emotional.”

Kurt tried not to read into the way Blaine emphasized emotional. Instead he distracted himself by asking the question he most wanted the answer to, “Why did you pick me to sing the duet with?”

Blaine took a deep breath, drawing on all of his courage, before he answered. “Kurt, there is a moment when you say to yourself ‘Oh! There you are. I’ve been looking for your forever.’”

Kurt began to breathe a little heavily. And when Blaine reached across the table to take his hand, he was pretty sure his heart stopped.

“Watching you do ‘Blackbird’ this week . . . that was a moment for me . . . about you. You move me, Kurt. Singing this duet together would just be an excuse to spend more time with you.”

Before Kurt could comprehend what was happening, Blaine was moving his head towards his. He was so close. Then their lips met, and an electric shock went through Kurt’s entire body. Blaine’s lips were on his, and his hand was on Kurt’s shoulder. Kurt moved his own hand up to cup Blaine’s cheek, pulling him closer. When they finally broke apart for air, Kurt was stunned.

Blaine looked embarrassed. He turned away before saying, “We should practice.”

“I thought we were,” Kurt said with a laugh.

Then Blaine’s lips were on his again, and Kurt never wanted this feeling to end. In that moment, he felt like he could do anything. He felt worthy of love and affection and so many things he had never felt he deserved. Kurt didn’t know how much time passed before they pulled apart again. But he would forever remember Blaine’s next question.

“Will you be my boyfriend?”

Kurt smiled, still not quite believing this was happening. But it was, and Blaine was waiting for his answer.

“Do you even have to ask?” Kurt asked, throwing his arms around Blaine.

Things were finally beginning to look up for Kurt. He finally felt perfect.

K/B

I shouldn’t be doing this, Kurt thought to himself. He stared at the blade in his right hand.

“Why are you making me do this?” he asked, not sure if he was talking to himself or the blade.

It was late, almost three o’clock, and Kurt was still awake. He had been fighting with himself for hours, knowing he shouldn’t even be considering cutting right now. He should be happy, he was with Blaine. He was finally perfect enough for Blaine. But now he had to keep up that perfection. He couldn’t slip, or Blaine would leave him.

Too exhausted to keep up the fight, Kurt gave in. He pressed the blade against his wrist, hissing as it bit into his skin. The pain grounded him, reminding him that he had finally reached perfection. He was strong. He was wanted. For once in his life, someone wanted Kurt Hummel.

Kurt dropped the blade into the sink, exhaustion having caught up to him finally now that he had found release. He knew he should clean up, but he was so tired. He had a single room, so no one would see him. Kurt allowed himself to crawl into bed without taking care of his wounds. He pulled the covers up over his body before falling into a dreamless sleep.

K/B

Having only been asleep for four hours, Kurt didn’t hear the knock on his room door. He slept right through it, even when it grew incessant in nature. He didn’t stir.

On the other side of the door, Blaine sighed. He had agreed to meet his boyfriend at seven o’clock so they could rehearse for their duet before regionals. Blaine fished through his messenger bag until he found his key ring. He picked out the key to Kurt’s room, given to him in case of emergencies, and inserted it into the lock. Turning the key, Blaine twisted the door handle, smiling when it opened.

Kurt didn’t hear the door creak as it was pushed open. If he had, maybe things would have turned out differently. But as it happened, he stayed fast asleep.

“Kurt?” a voice asked softly.

He groaned, burrowing further under the covers. The voice wasn’t giving up though. When he heard it again it was closer.

“Kurt, wake up. You missed rehearsal this morning.” The bed sagged under Blaine’s weight as he sat on the edge of it, shaking Kurt gently.

Kurt gasped in pain as his fresh cuts brushed against the mattress. Still groggy from sleep, he couldn’t think straight. The pain caused him to jump up, pushing the sheets away from his body. When he heard Blaine’s sharp intake of breath, he realized what he had just done.

“Kurt,” Blaine breathed.

He tried to fix it. He tried to pull the sheet back over his body, but Blaine was holding it away from him. Kurt had never felt more exposed than he did in that moment as Blaine’s eyes took in every scar, every fresh cut, and every healing wound.

Kurt began to breathe heavily. He needed to get away. He needed to fix this. His airway closed up. He fought for each breath he took. His eyes grew wide as he became more frantic.

“Kurt, breathe. Calm down, come on, you need to breathe. Just breathe,” Blaine said soothingly. He knew he had to remain calm for Kurt; panicking would only make things so much worse than they already were. So he placed a hand on either side of Kurt’s face, stroking his thumb over his boyfriend’s cheekbones. He brushed his lips against Kurt’s forehead, doing anything he could think of to calm him down so he could breathe.

When Kurt finally felt his airways open up again, he avoided looking at Blaine. He drew into himself, wishing he could disappear. Why hadn’t he cleaned up last night? Why had he been so stupid?

“I’m going to get you a glass of water,” Blaine told him, disappearing into the bathroom.

The second Blaine walked through the door to Kurt’s bathroom, he wished he hadn’t. There was blood on the countertop, clearly left over from the night before. And in the sink, was a bloodied razor. Blaine barely managed to hold himself together, knowing he had to for Kurt. Seeing the dried blood on Kurt’s skin had been bad enough, but seeing the instrument that had cut into his boyfriend’s skin, fresh with his blood, was even worse.

Blaine tore his eyes away from the sight. He grabbed the glass from next to the faucet, filling it with water before exiting the bathroom. Kurt hadn’t moved, except to pull the covers back up over his body. Blaine knew he was trying to act like nothing had happened, but this was one time he couldn’t allow Kurt to pretend. Kurt looked so small, sitting there with the covers pulled up to his shoulders.

“Here,” Blaine spoke softly, handing the glass to Kurt.

Kurt looked up slowly. He didn’t want to reach for the glass, knowing Blaine would see his scars again. But he was left with no choice, so he reached out with his right arm, keeping the sheet wrapped around the rest of his body.

“Why?” Blaine finally managed to choke out.

Kurt hung his head, determined not to meet Blaine’s eyes. He was too afraid of what he would find there if he looked. He was unable to do anything but sit and stare at the glass in his hand.

“Why, Kurt?” Blaine repeated, his voice choked with tears.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” Kurt cried, not sure what he was sorry for. He collapsed inwards as the dam holding his emotions broke and his tears began to fall. Blaine wrapped his arms around Kurt the best he could while the boy was curled into a ball.

“It’s okay. It’ll be all right,” Blaine whispered repeatedly into Kurt’s ear until at last he stopped crying. After several moments of silence, Blaine tried a different approach. “When did this start?”

Kurt swallowed the lump in his throat before answering. “The day Karofsky kissed me.”

Blaine sighed, but he didn’t say anything else. Neither of them moved. Finally, Kurt broke the awkward silence. “I had to be strong.”

“Strong for what? What are you talking about? You’re the strongest person I know, Kurt.” Blaine pulled away from the boy, keeping one arm wrapped loosely around his shoulders.

“Cutting makes me strong. It makes it easier for me to be perfect. When I cut, I don’t hurt anymore.” Kurt’s voice was muffled as he spoke into his knees.

“Look at me.” Blaine put a finger under Kurt’s chin, raising his head so he was looking him in the eyes. “You are the strongest person I know, Kurt Hummel. You’ve been through so much. Losing your mom, bullying.” Blaine paused. “I wish you had told me . . . what you’ve been doing to yourself. I could have helped you. I could have helped you find a solution instead of a temporary fix.”

“This is a solution.” Kurt frowned. Cutting was the only way he had made it through the past few months.

“It’s a solution, yes. But only a temporary one. Cutting gives you something to hide behind so you don’t have to feel. But if you don’t feel, Kurt, you can’t heal. Feeling is part of being human.”

“Then maybe I don’t want to be human!” Kurt exclaimed, getting to his feet. He walked to the window, staring out of it. “The past few months of my life have been a complete and total hell. But I found a way to get through them. I couldn’t be the perfect son that my father wanted but I could make myself strong enough to make him proud. I could at least appear perfect where I was nothing but flawed.

“You don’t know how I’ve been living in fear, in darkness. And I found a way out.” Kurt turned back around to face Blaine. “I found a way to live.”

“This isn’t living, Kurt. Don’t you see that? You’re killing yourself.” Blaine stood up too. He didn’t want this to turn into a shouting match, but it seemed Kurt was determined for it to end that way.

“I’m not suicidal, Blaine. I’m always careful.” Kurt glared at the boy, wishing he had never decided to come apologize.

“That’s why you’re bleeding onto your sheets.” Blaine waved a hand in the direction of Kurt’s wrist.

Kurt looked down. He rarely cussed, but he was already so distressed the word just slipped out. “Shit.”

Blaine followed when Kurt raced to his bathroom. He watched as Kurt pulled out gauze, medical tape, and a butterfly strip. He must have ripped the wound back open when his arm had brushed against the mattress. He should have bandaged the cuts last night but it was too late for that regret now.

“Do you need help?” Blaine asked helplessly from the doorway. He needed to do something. He couldn’t just stand there.

“No, thank you,” Kurt answered briskly. He brought the wound up to examine it. Sure enough, it had been reopened.

Blaine’s heart hurt to see the pain his boyfriend had caused himself. There were marks all over his body, both arms, his stomach and his chest. If he had been able to see Kurt’s thighs, he would have found marks there too.

When Kurt was finished, he walked past Blaine and back to his bed. He was so horrified that Blaine had found out, he kept waiting for the boy to turn tail and run. Yet here he was, sitting next to him on his bed. Kurt tried to fight back his tears, but they came anyway. He lay down on his side, staring out the window. He jumped when he felt Blaine’s body press up against him, holding him close to his body.

“What are you feeling?” Blaine whispered, brushing his lips against the back of Kurt’s neck.

Kurt shivered at his touch. He rolled over to face Blaine before answering. “Alone.”

“You’re not alone,” Blaine said, bringing a hand up to run through Kurt’s hair. “You’re never alone. You have me, someone who cares about you very much.”

Kurt didn’t answer, but he pressed his forehead against Blaine’s. He closed his eyes, drawing comfort from Blaine’s presence. He felt Blaine’s lips brush against his own. He opened his eyes, blue-green eyes looking deeply into hazel ones.

“What else helps when you’re upset?” Blaine asked softly.

Kurt didn’t answer immediately, but when he finally did the answer didn’t surprise Blaine. “Singing. It helps being able to pour all of my emotions into something, giving myself completely to the song.”

“Do you want to try it now?” Blaine hoped Kurt would. He needed to find a better way to deal with his emotions, and if he already knew singing helped then maybe that part wouldn’t be so hard. Anything was better than cutting into his own skin with a blade.

“I guess it couldn’t hurt,” Kurt answered.

“Do you have a song in mind?” Blaine asked, sitting up.

Kurt stood, going to where his iPod was in its dock. He scrolled through the song list until he found the one he was looking for. “Yes.”

The song began, and Blaine recognized it instantly. It wasn’t particularly well-known but he had heard it.

I’m not a stranger.

No, I am yours,

With crippled anger,

And tears that still drip sore.

A fragile frame aged

With misery.

And when our eyes meet,

I know you see.

Blaine took that moment to really look at his boyfriend. Kurt still hadn’t put a shirt on, and he wasn’t trying to hide his shame anymore. Blaine looked over his torso, trying not to let Kurt know he was doing so. If he did, the boy would shy away into himself again. But Blaine needed to access the damage he had done to himself. There were so many cuts, some longer and some wider. One particularly bad one on his wrist had healed completely, but you could tell it had been deep.

Blaine wondered how he had missed this. Some best friend he was, when he couldn’t even see that Kurt was a danger to himself. But Kurt hid it so well. He always wore long-sleeved shirts, and he never allowed anyone to see him when he was at his most vulnerable. Then Blaine realized that he never would have found out about the nightmares if he hadn’t walked in when Kurt was having one.

Looking at him now, Blaine could see just how miserable Kurt was. He had known the boy was struggling, but not to what extent. Blaine hated that he hadn’t been able to see what was happening right before his eyes, even if Kurt had been careful to hide it. Blaine should have known something was up.

I do not want to be afraid.

I do not want to die inside just to breathe in.

I’m tired of feeling so numb.

Relief exists I find it when,

I am cut.

Kurt felt a little of the pain leave him as he poured his emotions into the song. It was true. He felt alone, afraid, numb. The only way he knew how to cope with these feelings was to cut. It seemed impossible to feel so much pain at one time, and he feared that such anguish would kill him. He already felt dead inside.

I may seem crazy,

Or painfully shy.

And these scars wouldn’t be so hidden,

If you would just look me in the eye.

I feel alone here and cold here,

Though I don’t want to die.

But the only anesthetic that makes me feel anything kills inside.

Kurt knew what he did to himself was crazy. That was part of the reason why he didn’t want anyone to find out. But now Blaine knew, and everything was spiraling out of control. Kurt wanted to crawl back inside himself, to forget this had ever happened. He was surprised he had managed to keep his secret this long. He was constantly afraid that someone would find out; he felt like if someone had looked at him close enough they would figure it out. How wrong he had been. He had hid it so well, until Blaine saw him without his shirt. In one moment of stupidity, Kurt ruined everything.

He was surprised when Blaine had said he was killing himself. Kurt had thought about it, yes, but in the end he didn’t want to die. But sometimes, he didn’t want to live. Not wanting to die while not wanting to live was redundant. You couldn’t do both, Kurt knew this. But living hurt so much, while death was so uncertain. So Kurt cut himself, so he wouldn’t have to feel the bad emotions. He cut himself to live.

I do not want to be afraid.

I do not want to die inside just to breathe in.

I’m tired of feeling so numb.

Relief exists I find it when,

I am cut.

Pain.

I am not alone.

I am not alone.

Kurt ignored his tears as they fell. He still felt weak, but he could slowly feel some strength returning to him. Singing had always made him feel better. It just didn’t help as much as cutting, and it wasn’t as instantaneous, but it helped.

I’m not a stranger,

No I am yours,

With crippled anger,

And tears that still drip sore.

But I do not want to be afraid.

I do not want to die inside just to breathe in.

I’m tired of feeling so numb.

Relief exists I found it when,

I was cut.

As the song ended, Kurt fell apart even further. Blaine was there, pulling him into his arms again. He let Kurt cry on his shoulder until his sobs subsided. Blaine took Kurt’s hand, leading him over to the bed. He lay down on his back, opening his arms to his boyfriend. Kurt moved into Blaine’s arms, resting his head on the boy’s chest. He listened to his heartbeat.

That was when the moment really sunk in. Blaine knew. Oh God, he knew. Surely he’d run now that he knew. He’d leave Kurt, and then Kurt would really truly be alone. He didn’t notice he had started crying again until Blaine asked him what was wrong. Kurt cried even harder, the sobs shaking his entire body.

“Kurt, please talk to me. I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me.” Blaine rubbed his hand up and down Kurt’s back, comfortingly.

Kurt sat up so he could look at his boyfriend. “It’s just . . . we just got together and now you know, and I can’t – oh God, don’t leave me!”

Kurt flung himself at Blaine, his fingers clenching into the fabric of Blaine’s t-shirt. Blaine was shocked, holding Kurt to him tightly.

“I’m not going to leave you, Kurt,” he said softly in the boy’s ear.

“You’re not?” Kurt asked tentatively, looking up at Blaine.

“No. You’re not just my boyfriend; you were my best friend long before we became boyfriends. I will never leave you, never.”

“You promise?” Kurt’s voice sounded broken, like he was unsure.

“I promise.” Blaine brushed his lips against Kurt’s briefly. “I will never leave you.”

Kurt relaxed against Blaine, his anxieties soothed for the moment. Neither moved for a while, until Blaine glanced at the clock.

“Crap. You need to get ready or we’ll be late and Wes will kill us.” Blaine reluctantly pulled away from Kurt. “Do you want me to leave so you can get dressed in peace?”

Blaine knew him leaving would be pointless, as Kurt was still not wearing a shirt and his secret had already been found out. But he wanted to give Kurt the option. Truthfully, he didn’t want to leave Kurt. Not when he was so vulnerable like this.

“No, you can stay. I don’t want to be alone right now.” Kurt admitted, averting his eyes shyly.

Blaine noticed the way Kurt avoided his eyes. He put his finger under Kurt’s chin, raising his head so he was looking him in the eyes. “Hey, don’t be ashamed to admit how you feel. Especially not to me. I’m not going anywhere. I promise. Now, go get ready.”

Kurt smiled, leaning in to kiss him chastely. He still couldn’t believe Blaine was his, or that Blaine knew and hadn’t high-tailed it in the opposite direction. He knew things had been changed, but as long as he had Blaine by his side, he wasn’t as alone as he felt.

K/B

The bus ride to regionals had been nerve-wracking. Kurt had never been more nervous in his life. And all too soon, the bus was pulling up into the parking lot. The next few hours flew by in a blur for Kurt. Before he knew it, everything was over and they were climbing back onto the bus. Once the bus pulled up at Dalton, the boys dispersed.

Blaine followed Kurt into one of the courtyards, where they buried Pavarotti under a tree. Blaine watched Kurt carefully as he smoothed soil over the canary’s casket. When he was done, Kurt stepped back.

“This reminds you of your mom’s funeral, doesn’t it?” Blaine asked softly.

“It does, but it’s not just that. I really wanted to win regionals.” Kurt turned to look at Blaine.

“I know, we all did. But just because we won’t be competing doesn’t mean we won’t perform. There are still nursing homes and hospitals.” Blaine took Kurt’s hand in his. “Anyway, what we got out of this is much better than some dumb trophy. We got each other. So really, we did win.”

Kurt smiled, tugging Blaine over to sit on one of the benches. “Well, when you put it that way it’s hard to be disappointed.”

Blaine laughed but the laughter died with a sigh. “Kurt, we need to talk.”

Kurt looked at him quizzically. “About what?”

“You have to tell your dad . . . about the cutting.” Blaine rubbed his thumb over the back of Kurt’s hand. “You need to speak to a therapist, and your dad needs to know what’s going on with you.”

“He’s going to hate me.” Kurt could feel his strength dissolving as he fought back his tears.

“What? No, he won’t. Your dad loves you, Kurt. More than anything. I know this isn’t going to be easy, but you have to do it. If you want, I’ll go with you.” Blaine offered.

“You will?” Kurt asked, surprised.

“Of course. I told you, you’re stuck with me whether you like it or not.” Blaine bumped their shoulders together playfully.

“Good, because I wouldn’t have it any other way.” Kurt brought their lips together to meet in a sweet kiss.

When they pulled apart, Blaine leaned his forehead against Kurt’s. “So, you’ll talk to him?”

“You’ll go with me?”

“Yes.”

“Then yes.”

Kurt closed his eyes, drawing strength from Blaine’s presence. He knew this wasn’t going to be easy, but he was beginning to feel like he could accomplish anything with Blaine by his side.