Oct. 21, 2012, 4:52 p.m.
Perfect
Perfect: Epilogue
M - Words: 3,813 - Last Updated: Oct 21, 2012 Story: Complete - Chapters: 40/40 - Created: Jun 06, 2012 - Updated: Oct 21, 2012 380 0 0 0 1
Epilogue
Kurt lay on his back on a navy blanket under his favorite tree in Schoonover Park. One arm was curled under his head as he stared up into the branches of the tall oak. He heard movement beside him, but didn’t turn to look or otherwise acknowledge that he had heard anything besides the rustling of leaves over his head.
“What’re you thinking about?”
Kurt smiled, not answering immediately. He was content to lay here for as long as possible, knowing soon everything was going to change. Finally, when he knew he could not ignore the question any longer, he turned his head towards the asker and answered, “You.”
Blaine couldn’t help but smile. He pulled on Kurt’s free hand until he was sitting up. Blaine entwined their fingers, staring at the contrast in skin tones before he raised his eyes to his boyfriend’s.
“I know I’m supposed to wait until tonight, but I can’t any longer.”
“It wasn’t so much that you were supposed to wait but that you weren’t supposed to buy me anything to begin with.”
“You only turn eighteen once, Kurt.” Blaine reached into the pocket of his blazer, withdrawing a rectangular jewelry box. He pressed the box into Kurt’s hands as he said, “Open it.”
Kurt sighed, trying hard to act disapproving, but they both knew the truth. He slid his hand free of Blaine’s, slowly pulling the lid off of the box. Kurt gasped; his eyes grew wide and snapped to Blaine’s face.
“You don’t like it.” Blaine’s face fell. “I knew it was a stupid idea.”
“No, no, honey, no!” Kurt scrambled to his knees, clutching one of Blaine’s hands to his chest. “It’s beautiful. I love it. I love you. Here, put it on me?”
Blaine took the box from Kurt. Inside was a sterling silver puzzle piece pendant with a cursive letter ‘B’ engraved in the middle. Blaine lifted the necklace from the box and slid his arms around Kurt’s neck. He fumbled with the clasp, but finally it caught. The necklace fell to rest over Kurt’s sternum. Kurt brought one hand up, brushing his finger across the pendant.
“I love it,” he repeated.
“I’m glad,” Blaine said with a soft smile. He pulled Kurt closer. “Come here; let me show you something else.”
Before Kurt could ask any questions, Blaine had reached into his shirt and was pulling out his own necklace. This one was identical to Kurt’s, except it had an engraving of a cursive letter ‘K.’ Kurt was surprised he hadn’t noticed the chain earlier, but Blaine had hidden it well. Blaine brought his pendant next to Kurt’s. Kurt gasped when the puzzle pieces clicked together. Two broken pieces formed a whole.
“They’re magnets,” Blaine explained, “because no matter where I am or what I’m doing, I can feel something pulling me towards you, wherever you may be.”
A single teardrop rolled down Kurt’s cheek, but he didn’t raise a finger to wipe it away. Blaine smiled lovingly, kissing the tear away. His lips moved closer to Kurt’s.
“Happy birthday, Kurt,” Blaine whispered before closing the distance between them.
K/B
“What do you boys have planned for today?” Carole asked as she set a plate of whole wheat pancakes down on the table.
A week had passed since Kurt’s eighteenth birthday, and the boys had not gone an entire twenty-four hours without seeing each other. In fact, since their graduation day, most mornings had been spent in a similar fashion. Kurt would text Blaine as soon as he woke and Blaine would drive to Kurt’s house to eat breakfast with the Hudmels.
“Some of the Warblers are going to be at Dalton today. I thought we could go see them one last time before we leave,” Blaine suggested.
“It’s summertime. Why would they be at Dalton over the summer?” Kurt asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Every summer, the Warblers have a party for the members who graduated that year. Nick and Jeff invited us,” Blaine explained as he poured syrup over his pancakes.
“Why didn’t you go last summer?” Kurt asked. Something wasn’t quite making sense to him.
“Carole, would you like a cup of coffee?” Blaine asked suddenly, springing to his feet and heading towards the coffeemaker. Kurt knew he was purposefully avoiding the question, but knew if it was something important, Blaine would tell him. So he let it go, for now.
K/B
“I thought you said the Warblers would be here,” Kurt said as Blaine pulled into the parking lot at Dalton Academy. No other cars were in sight.
“They’re supposed to be,” Blaine said in apparent confusion. “Let’s go see if they’re hiding somewhere.”
Kurt followed Blaine into the school, which was surprisingly unlocked despite the fact that no one else seemed to be around. Blaine led the way down the hall to a spiral staircase. They were almost to the bottom of the stairs when Blaine turned around, standing two steps in front of Kurt.
“This is where we first met,” Blaine said softly, a smile on his face.
Kurt grinned, his mind rushing back to that day. The day that changed everything. Kurt was unhappy, suicidal even. But the second he met Blaine all thoughts of ending his life ceased to exist. Blaine had saved him so many times, in so many ways, over the past year alone. And to think he had only come to Dalton on a secret spy mission for one Noah Puckerman.
“Excuse me, can I ask you a question?” Kurt asked with an innocent smile. “I’m new here.”
“My name’s Blaine,” he answered immediately, offering Kurt his hand.
“Kurt,” Kurt replied as he shook Blaine’s hand.
They tried to hold it in but laughter bubbled out from them. When Kurt moved to release his hand, Blaine tightened his grip as he brought Kurt’s hand up to his lips. He took Kurt’s other hand and brought it up as well.
“I love you,” Blaine said simply.
“I love you too,” Kurt replied. “I did the second I saw you. And when you sang ‘Teenage Dream,’ it was like you were singing right at me.”
“Because I was,” Blaine told him.
“And that ‘short cut’ was so not short,” Kurt said with a laugh.
“Can you blame me for wanting to spend more time with you?” Blaine asked.
“No,” Kurt replied. He turned to look around the stairway. “This place hasn’t changed at all, not that I expected it to.”
“Kurt,” Blaine said softly.
Kurt turned back around, gasping when he saw Blaine down on one knee. Kurt’s right hand flew up to his mouth and Blaine took his left one in his own.
“Kurt, I was enthralled by you the second I saw you. You held yourself with such grace that I could only ever wish for, but I knew instantly that there was something deeper. Your eyes were haunted, and I instantly wanted to take away whatever pain caused that. I tried so hard not to think about you as anything other than a friend, even going so far as to pursue another. But in the end I knew it was you. I was too afraid to risk it at first, but when you sang ‘Blackbird’ that day . . . there was so much compassion in your voice and I knew I had to risk it or I’d die never knowing what it was like to love you and be loved by you in return.
"This year has been filled with uncertainties. But there’s one thing that has always been certain, and that’s you. Whether you went to NYADA or OSU, I knew that I would be here, on my knee, today. We’ve been through so much and it’s only strengthened our relationship. No matter what happens, I know I will be with you for the rest of my life. I will spend every day loving you, adoring you, cherishing you.” Blaine paused, reaching into his pocket and withdrawing a small jewelry box. He opened the box to reveal a platinum Tiffany Circlet ring, Elizabeth Hummel’s ring. “Kurt Elizabeth Hummel, would you do me the honor of becoming my husband?”
“Yes, a thousand times yes!” Kurt gasped through his tears.
Blaine’s face lit up. He gently pulled the ring out from its box, and looking deeply into Kurt’s eyes, he slipped it onto the third finger of Kurt’s left hand. Kurt pulled Blaine to his feet, wrapping his arms around his neck as he kissed him passionately. They were both crying, clinging to each other and never wanting to let go. When their lungs were burning in their chests from lack of oxygen, they forced themselves to pull apart. Kurt brought his left hand up to his face, examining the ring. A center diamond was surrounded by a circle of diamonds which was nestled into a diamond band.
“How did you get my mother’s ring?” Kurt asked through his tears.
“Remember prom night? You stayed at my house and the next morning we went to yours. While you were upstairs doing your moisturizing routine, I talked to your dad. And after assuring him that we would not jump into things like Finn and Rachel, he gave us his blessing and asked me to propose with your mother’s ring,” Blaine explained in a soft voice.
“I’m glad you did.” Kurt tore his eyes away from his mother’s ring to look deep into Blaine’s eyes. “We have to go tell our parents.”
“Not right now,” Blaine said with a coy smile. “Right now, we are going back to your house to celebrate.”
“But my dad-”
“- is at work.”
“Carole-”
“Also at work.”
“And Finn-”
“- is at Rachel’s. We have plenty of time to celebrate with them later. Right now, I want to celebrate with my fiancé.” Kurt’s face lit up the second the word left Blaine’s mouth. He kissed him deeply and when they pulled apart, he allowed Blaine to lead him out of the building.
K/B
“Is it weird that I’m already used to seeing her ring on my finger?” Kurt asked several hours later, his head pillowed against Blaine’s chest.
They had left Dalton and driven directly to Kurt’s house. The drive had taken two hours, but neither were bothered with the time. They were engaged. They were together. That was all that they needed. Once in the privacy of Kurt’s bedroom, they had made love slowly, reveling in the sensation of loving one another with their whole beings.
“No, it’s not,” Blaine answered. They lapsed back into a comfortable silence until Blaine felt a hot tear splash onto his collarbone. He immediately pushed Kurt back so he could look him in the eyes. “Hey, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?”
“I just wish my mom could be here to see her only child’s engagement,” Kurt cried.
“Oh, baby, she is here. She’s watching over you every day of your life. And she wouldn’t want you to cry. She would want you to be happy,” Blaine paused. “I know you don’t believe in God or Heaven, and I’m not sure what I believe, but I do believe that you will see her again one day.”
Kurt wanted nothing more than to believe what Blaine said was true, but he couldn’t. Because God wasn’t real and neither was Heaven. Kurt would never see his mother again. This thought made him cry harder than before. Blaine pulled Kurt back into his arms, holding him close as he began to sing.
Lay down,
Your sweet and weary head.
Night is falling.
You’ve come to journey's end.
Sleep now,
And dream of the ones who came before.
They are calling
From across the distant shore.
Blaine knew Kurt missed his mother each and every day, and not having her here to join in their happiness made him miss her even more. Blaine knew Kurt didn’t believe in a higher being or an afterlife, but Blaine knew Elizabeth Hummel was watching over her son. And she would be there in spirit on their wedding day, at the birth of their children, and at their college graduations. She would be there, always.
Why do you weep?
What are these tears upon your face?
Soon you will see,
All of your fears will pass away.
Safe in my arms,
You're only sleeping.
Kurt remembered the day his mother died like it was yesterday. The sight of her immobile body lying in the mahogany casket haunted him to this day. She had looked like she was sleeping, and he wanted her to wake up more than anything.
What can you see
On the horizon?
Why do the white gulls call?
Across the sea,
A pale moon rises.
The ships have come to carry you home.
His father had tried to stay strong for his son, but Kurt could hear him crying at night. His mother had been sick for a long time. The cancer had spread rapidly. Chemotherapy destroyed her immune system. And when she caught pneumonia, the doctors had all but given up.
And all will turn
To silver glass.
A light on the water
All souls pass.
Blaine had been lucky. He had never lost a loved one. He couldn’t even imagine losing his mother. Especially not at a young age. Kurt had been forced to grow up without his mother. His childhood had been ripped away while he was still in elementary school.
Hope fades
Into the world of night;
Through shadows falling
Out of memory and time.
Don't say: “We have come now to the end.”
White shores are calling.
You and I will meet again.
More than anything, Kurt wanted his mother back. He wanted her here to share in this happy moment with them. Kurt was thankful he had his father and Carole. Carole could never replace his mother, no one ever could, but she was the best stepmother he could have ever asked for.
And you'll be here in my arms,
Just sleeping.
What can you see
On the horizon?
Why do the white gulls call?
Across the sea,
A pale moon rises.
The ships have come to carry you home.
And all will turn
To silver glass
A light on the water
Grey ships pass
Into the west.
Kurt’s tears had subsided as he listened to Blaine sing. Blaine brushed his lips across Kurt’s forehead. Kurt snuggled deeper into his arms.
“I want you to meet her . . . before we leave,” Kurt said after a while.
“Really?” Blaine asked, surprised. While they had certainly spoken about Kurt’s mother before, they had never discussed visiting her gravesite. “You want me to?”
“I do,” Kurt answered. “You’re my world, Blaine, my everything. I know if my mom were here, she’d love you just as much as I do. And just because she’s passed doesn’t mean that still can’t happen.”
“Of course, it doesn’t. I’m so proud of you. You’ve come so far, Kurt,” Blaine said with a fond smile.
“I have you to thank for that. I wouldn’t have gone into recovery if not for you,” Kurt said modestly.
“You would have gotten there eventually. I have faith in you.”
“You always do.”
“And I always will.”
K/B
“Are you okay?” Blaine asked, watching Kurt carefully. It was the day after Blaine had proposed and they were sitting in Blaine’s car in the parking lot of the Lima Cemetery.
Kurt drew in a deep breath, biting his lip. He nodded slowly before answering, “Yeah, just give me a minute. It’s still hard coming here.”
“Take your time,” Blaine said, reaching over to squeeze his hand.
Kurt concentrated on his breathing, fighting back his tears. He wasn’t even at her grave yet and he was already tearing up. Several minutes passed before he said, “Okay,” and pushed open the car door. The second the door closed behind him, his tears began to fall. Blaine hurried to his side, wrapping an arm around his waist. Kurt leaned his head against Blaine’s shoulder, drawing in a shuddering breath as he began to sing.
You were once my one companion.
You were all that mattered.
You were once a friend and father.
Then my world was shattered.
Elizabeth had been everything to Kurt. She was his best friend. While Burt worked at the shop, Elizabeth stayed home with Kurt. Once he was old enough to attend school, Elizabeth spent the day taking care of the house but made sure she was always on the bus stop on time to walk Kurt home. Kurt remembered when she first got sick and wasn’t able to walk with him anymore. He had been devastated.
Wishing you were somehow here again;
Wishing you were somehow near.
Sometimes it seemed if I just dreamed,
Somehow you would be here.
More than anything, Kurt wanted his mother back again. Even though it had been ten long years, Kurt knew that would always be his greatest wish. How he longed for her comforting scent to wash over him as she held him in a loving embrace. Kurt still had dreams where she came back, where she had never died. It was the hardest to wake from those dreams and remember she wasn’t there, that she would never be there.
Wishing I could hear your voice again,
Knowing that I never would.
Dreaming of you won't help me to do
All that you dreamed I could.
Kurt missed her smile, her laugh, the sound of her voice as she sang him to sleep each night. He would never experience those things again. They had been taken from him. Kurt only hoped he was somehow making her proud, even with all the mistakes he had made. Elizabeth had always encouraged him to follow his dreams and often told him no dream was too big. If you could dream it, you could make it happen. Kurt hoped by following his dreams he was making her proud. She had always said he could do whatever he set his mind to.
Passing bells and sculpted angels,
Cold and monumental,
Seem for you the wrong companions.
You were warm and gentle.
Kurt led Blaine through the headstones and statues. The stony stares of the angels had always made him uneasy. This place was cold and hard, not the right place for his mother who was the most loving person he had ever known.
Too many years fighting back tears.
Why can't the past just die?
Wishing you were somehow here again.
Knowing we must say goodbye.
Try to forgive, teach me to live.
Give me the strength to try.
The past ten years of his life had been spent running from his emotions. He forced back his tears and hid away his pain. But no matter how far he tried to run, the past would always catch up to him. Kurt knew his mother would never return to him. For a long time he had been mad at her for abandoning him. But he wasn’t anymore. He knew she had not chosen to leave. Now he tried to live as she had, spreading love and joy. It wasn’t always easy, but Kurt was never one to give up. So he kept trying, just as his mother had taught him.
No more memories, no more silent tears.
No more gazing across the wasted years.
Help me say goodbye.
Help me say goodbye!
Kurt stopped in front of his mother’s grave, dropping Blaine’s hand. He slowly fell to his knees in front of the headstone, lifting one hand to trace over the letters that spelt “Elizabeth Marie Hummel.” Kurt didn’t bother trying to fight his tears, but let them fall freely.
“Hi, Mama,” Kurt whispered. He knew in his heart that his mother couldn’t hear him, but talking to her resting place somehow made him feel better. “A lot has happened since I was here on Mother’s Day. We won nationals. I graduated high school. I wish you could have been there, for that and . . .” Kurt took a deep breath, looking up at Blaine who was still standing. He grabbed his hand and tugged him down beside him. “Mama, this is Blaine. He’s the love of my life, my soul mate, my everything. Mama, he asked me to marry him. I wish you could be here to see us. He makes me so h-happy, Mama.”
Kurt’s voice broke off as his tears came stronger than before. Blaine squeezed his hand, reminding him that he was there.
“Hi, Mrs. Hummel,” Blaine said softly.
“Elizabeth,” Kurt interrupted, speaking through his tears. “She’d want you to call her Elizabeth.”
“Elizabeth,” Blaine repeated. “I want you to know that I love your son more than anything or anyone in this world. I don’t know what I would do without him. He’s the most amazing person I’ve ever met, and I would like to thank you for that.”
Kurt smiled, leaning his head on Blaine’s shoulder. He drew in a deep breath before he spoke, “I don’t know when I’ll be able to visit you again, Mama. We’re moving to New York in a week. I got into NYADA, Mama, and Blaine’s going to NYU. I’m following my dreams, just like you always told me to. I promise I’ll come back whenever we’re back in Lima. I love you, Mama,” Kurt said as he got to his feet.
“It was nice to meet you, Elizabeth. I promise I’ll take good care of your son,” Blaine said, looking at Kurt with a smile.
“You already are,” Kurt assured him with a chaste kiss.
K/B
“Are you sure that’s everything?” Burt asked as he helped Kurt, Blaine, and Finn carry the last of their boxes to Kurt’s Navigator. They had spent the past week packing for the move to New York. Now the furniture they were taking with them was in a U-Haul that Burt and Carole would be driving while Kurt and Blaine were taking the Navigator and Finn would follow in his truck with Rachel.
“I’m positive, Dad,” Kurt said as he closed the tailgate to the Navigator.
“This is it,” Blaine said, coming up behind him. He wrapped an arm around Kurt’s waist, pulling him close.
“We’ll see you in Manhattan,” Burt said.
After hugs had been exchanged all around, everyone climbed into their respective vehicles. Blaine leaned over the center console to press a loving kiss to Kurt’s lips. When he pulled back there was a mischievous glint in his eye. His lips curled into a smile as he began to sing.
Roads go ever, ever on,
Over rock and under tree,
By caves where never sun has shone,
By streams that never find the sea;
Over snow by winter sown,
And through the merry flowers of June,
Over grass and over stone,
And under mountains in the moon.
Kurt couldn’t help but laugh at Blaine’s geekiness. Only he would remember the words to J.R.R. Tolkien’s song from The Hobbit. Some people may think it embarrassing, but Kurt found it endearing. He loved that Blaine shared his love of literature. He knew between the two of them their condo in New York would be filled with books. And it would be filled with love.
Roads go ever, ever on,
Under cloud and under star,
Yet feet that wandering have gone
Turn at last to home afar.
Eyes that fire and sword have seen
And horror in the halls of stone
Look at last on meadows green
And trees and hills they long have known.
“Are you nervous?” Blaine asked when he had finished singing.
“For the beginning of the rest of our lives? Not at all,” Kurt answered.
And it was true. Most people would be nervous to move to a new city and live with their fiancé. But not Kurt. There was not a doubt in his mind that he had made the right decision. He had his fiancé, his stepbrother, and his best friend. Everything was perfect.