April 14, 2016, 7 p.m.
Goodnight (Sequel): Chapter 22
M - Words: 2,535 - Last Updated: Apr 14, 2016 Story: Closed - Chapters: 4/? - Created: Feb 13, 2016 - Updated: Feb 13, 2016 268 0 0 0 0
The wedding was to take place in early February, on Valentine's Day to be exact. Burt and Carole decided to get married that year, because why wait? They weren't getting any younger, and everyone was so into the idea, it just seemed pointless to have a 2 year engagement like most couples would do. Christmas had been a joyful experience for everyone, and everyone seemed to be really happy for once. No stress of social workers, no stress of school, and even better no sign of any family wanting to claim Kurt.
The social workers had come back telling Burt early January that they couldn't get in contact with anyone because the mother had been really strict about not wanting her family to know about her and Kurt, she had changed her last name and Kurt's last name so they couldn't be found, and when they did trace back a grandmother Kurt apparently had, it was too late to ask her because she passed away 2 months ago, so they said he was in luck.
When Burt explained this to Kurt well he kept it shorter – more about the social workers not finding anyone, because he believed the kid had the right to know what was going on, Kurt appeared somewhat distress. Burt smoothed a hair out of his sad eyes and frowned “What's wrong kiddo?”
“I…I'm confused, I don't know, I think I'm ok daddy,”
“Kurt, I know that look. It's like the look you gave me when I said you had to wait till another week before you and Blaine could have a sleepover,”
“Does this mean you don't want to be my daddy anymore?” Kurt whispered brokenly. What the- He obviously hadn't said what he needed to say the right way.
Burt pulled the little boy closer and shook his head almost furiously. “What!? No! God Kurt, what made you think that? You're the best kid, anyone could ask for,”
“But…” Kurt seemed to hesitate but Burt nudged him to continue and nodded encouragingly. They were on the living room couch, watching TV since School didn't start for a bit after Christmas. Carole had taken Finn to the grocery stores, and insisted that it was okay for them too to stay behind.
“Spill it out son, I'm not going nowhere, and neither are you,” Burt said firmly and couldn't help but stare at Kurt's outfit. Kurt was wearing a white collared t-shirt, a rainbow tie under a black vest and grey jeans. He wore shiny black shoes that Kurt had asked Carole if she could clean with soap, and she chuckled saying she had something better. She got the shoe polish out and shown him how to polish his shoes. His hair was also perfect. He looked like the model kids like the ones you saw in the Gap advertisements on television.
They had a year supply of kids stuff now, they could afford a little splurge and Kurt's wardrobe was expanding..
The kid had an eye for fashion, and he planned on mentioning it but didn't want to ruin Kurt's confession. If he mentioned his clothes now, Kurt might not open up about this issue later. He knew the kid well enough to know when he's troubled by something and doesn't think he can tell an adult about it.
“I…I thought because you're trying to find my mom you don't want me anymore. I don't want to go back. Please don't make me go, please Mr Burt, please. I'll be good. I won't see Blaine anymore if you want, I know you don't li..like him. I'll do help with the chores…and I'll be good, I promise I'll be good,”
Burt's heart broke. Kurt still struggled in the idea that he was worthy of being loved. His mother had really messed up in that department and Burt would do whatever it took to show Kurt he was a special little kid. Because he was. He brought Burt so much love and happiness, Burt vowed to do the same. He still sometimes had bad dreams, but he rarely wet the bed, which is a good sign, and also a reason he had wanted Blaine to come over. He felt more confident with himself.
Burt held Kurt tighter “I'm your dad, and I'm not letting you go again you hear?” He ignored the point about Blaine, he'd talk to Kurt about that later.
“But…but why are you looking for her?” He sobbed as Burt wiped away his tears with his sleeve and kissed his forehead.
“Kiddo, sometimes we don't have control over our lives as much as we'd like. Your mother left you in a bad situation Kurt. She left you to die baby boy,” He stroked his cheek to show his affection and that, he was loved.
“But…she's still your mum, I'm not your biological father, so I can't immediately just take you from someone whose not related to me do you get what I'm trying to say?”
He wasn't sure how much 8 year olds understood but Kurt nodded. “I think…I think so. You're saying like…you can't just steal someone else's kid, but didn't she give me away to you? She didn't want me anyway, I really want you to keep me, I- I - like being your son. I wanna be a part of this family Mr Burt, I don't wanna go, not ever,” Burt clutched him tighter and embarrassingly tears fell out of his own eyes “You're not going no where. Listen to me, I love you, and you are a good kid,”
Burt nodded “and yes your mum gave you to me, that was only meant to be for a while, until she got better, but nobody knew this would happen, so that's why they have to see if anyone else wants to keep you before they can give you to me, but Kurt, I'll fight till my death to have you stay here, I will okay? Nobody has said you can't be mine though because the only person they found out who was close to your mother was your grandmother, but she passed away Kurt,”
“So…I can stay?” Kurt gripped on tighter to his shirt while he sat in his lap. He never was too old to sit in Burt's lap.
Burt grinned through his tears and hugged Kurt tighter who had leapt in his arms “You're staying kid,” Kurt's still thin pale arms wrapped around him while he buried his head in his neck and sobbed openly. “Thank you for saving me,”
Burt was too choked up to answer so he kissed his forehead and held on.
If Burt thought THAT was hard, he had no way been prepared for what was coming. That was only the first hurdle.
It took him another week to get Kurt to tell him why he had appeared to be over thinking a situation. He always looked like he wanted to talk but hesitated. Carole had suggested she take Finn for a walk to the park, Kurt was still eating breakfast, and Carole knew Kurt needed some time alone with Burt to get out what he needed to say.
Burt finally had it after Kurt's third attempt of bringing up the subject of what was bothering him over breakfast and put his newspaper down.
“What is it kid? I know something's bothering you,” Kurt wasn't sure if Burt was upset or angry or just confused but he had to ask.
“Why do you hate Blaine?”
Burt's mouth hang open in shock and then he closed it and pulled his chair closer “What makes you think I hate Blaine?”
“You look at him like my mummy used to look at me when I did something wrong,”
Kurt said quietly staring at Burt carefully waiting for his expression like he'd be real mad.
“I see you sometimes look at him that way and Blaine doesn't notice but I do, he….why don't you like him?”
“I do like Blaine,”
Kurt didn't look convinced and Burt sighed.
“I definitely don't hate Blaine,”
“He loves me daddy,” Kurt smiled as he remembered the way Blaine told him. He looked up shyly “And I think he loves me like you love Carole, and Blaine's mummy loves Blaine's daddy –but I can't” He noticed Kurt's hand starting to shake. “I can't understand why you hate him? He told me he loves me though and I don't want you to hate him daddy,”
At first Burt had stared at Kurt “He said what?” At his shocked tone, Kurt flinched a little knowing when adults were about to get angry. Burt tried to calm himself down for Kurt's sake. “I'm not angry Kurt,”
Burt wasn't sure how to feel about that, they're just kids! What does one do in this situation? Which is also a reason why he postponed the sleepover.
“You sound kinda angry,” Kurt was brave enough to admit. Burt sighed and rubbed a hand over his head.
“Again, I don't hate Blaine. I'm more surprised. Normally, people don't talk about this kind of stuff until they're older buddy that's all,”
“So mummy was right? I can't love Blaine?” His tears welling up struggling to hold them in he whispered “I can't love a boy?”
Kurt looked crushed and Burt hated himself for putting that expression on his face. Tears started to well up in his eyes and Burt shook his head immediately “That's not what I meant Kurt,”
God Kurt was only 8, and already he was having the talk?
“When two people love each other very much…they use that in way to connect to each other, like me and Carole, we make ourselves two better people because of it, I'll explain it better when you're older,”
Kurt still looked confused as he blinked at Burt “So why can't that be me and Blaine?” He threw down his spoon for his cereal that he had been holding and put his arms on his hips defensively “I'm not a baby daddy,” The way he looked made Burt laughed and then he caught Kurt looking somewhat angrier at that dismal so he stopped and then put his hand up “I know Kurt. You're much more mature than most kids your age,”
“I don't understand what you're trying to say, is it wrong or not?”
Burt thought about it. It didn't make sense even to him what he was saying.
“It's not wrong but it isn't exactly ..ideal for you and Blaine right now. Blaine is a good kid, and he's a good friend, and I think you and him get along real well, but just let me think okay kid? I'm not used to doing this kind of talk,”
Kurt looked down in a glum kind of way as though he had disappointed Burt “Okay Mr Burt,” He focused his eyes on the television then and Burt felt his heart tear a little.
Kurt hadn't called him Mr Burt in a long time. He knew he had upset the kid then.
Burt still wasn't over the moon about Blaine, but he knew the kid made Kurt happy, and would catch a star for him if he could so he talked to Carole about it when she came back home she let him talk her ears off. Burt began to panic because Kurt was ignoring him; he said he really didn't know what he did when Carole asked what happened. “Blaine's a nice kid, but he's overly happy, and overly spoilt, and he just seems too- different to Kurt, but yet Kurt thinks he's the bees knees,”
“Well you know what they say about opposites attract, he looks to you like you're handing him the moon,” Carole rejected and gave him a knowing smile “I think- you're jealous of Blaine,”
Burt gaped at her. WHAT? Jealous of Blaine? How absurd.
He told her so.
“That's nonsense. I have no reason to be jealous of Blaine, he's a kid,”
“Whose got Kurt's attention when you used to have ALL his attention, a kid who happens to love Kurt as much as you love him,” Carole pointed out and he grumbled something unintelligent and something along the lines of ‘too young'. She laughed.
“Don't be so miserable Mr Grumpy Gills. There will be times when Kurt gets hurt, or scrapes his knee, or has his first heartbreak, or fails his homework or breaks up with his first relationship. You don't need to be angry or jealous or whatever it is you have against Blaine- ”
Burt went to object and say he had nothing against Blaine, he knew how happy he made Kurt but Carole held up a hand to stop “Don't say you have nothing against him because I see the way your eyes narrow in an almost scowl just like Kurt noticed and I see the way you watch them to make sure he isn't doing anything wrong to Kurt, we all need to take risk sometimes, even children especially at young ages so when they're older they can be resilient and know how to get back up again- we all have our hearts broken once or twice before were done. Just look at you and me, were a classic example of that, he's a strong kid Burt, he's a fighter. If his mother didn't kill him, having a very close friendship with another boy certainly won't, and so what if they love each other? We just gotta watch them. Whatever happens with him and Blaine will not break him, and you need to stop shielding Kurt from that young boy who adores your son because they both deserve all the happiness life can give them,”
“But Carole, they're so young, how can they already know about love? I didn't even know about how attractive girls were until I was 13” Burt pointed out staring at the little red heart Kurt was clutching in his sleep. He couldn't help but feel the need to protect Kurt from all he's been through.
Carole looked to Kurt and bent down to kiss his cheek and then went to do the same to Finn who was sleeping next to Kurt again. Because Kurt was so quiet, Burt let Finn keep him company.
“Yes, he is young, and so is Blaine, but were the adults here Burt, that's why there are ground rules and that's why we're there so if they do fall we can still lend a hand to help them back to ground level, they don't have to do it alone, but they can make their choices alone,”
It did start to make a lot more sense. “Now I think, you need to have another chat with Kurt,”
Burt sighed.
Being a parent was challenging but for Kurt, he'd do anything, even as uncomfortable as having a topic like this. He grunted as he walked up the stairs to Kurt's bedroom to do just that.