Blaine stood there, waiting for Kurt to elaborate. He didn't dare to move, too afraid of the outcomes of any of his moves.

"I broke up with you, Blaine." Kurt repeated like he needed to say it one more time to be sure this bit of flashback was real. "That's… That's the shirt you were wearing when I broke up with… you." He finished he sentence in a whisper and looked up at Blaine. Kurt saw fear, shock and embarrassment on the man's face. He didn't need any other clue to know that it was real. They had broken up. This piece of information and Blaine's silence, the stress of many weeks took control and Kurt broke down.

"So it's true then? I did break up with you? Do you remember how I did this Blaine?" Kurt stepped forward at every question, furious that the man hadn't even told him that before. "Answer me, Blaine! I broke up with you, not face to face but on freaking Skype! Do you remember that? Because now, I do! So tell me, what didn't you tell me before?"

Blaine's head was bowed down, he didn't move and even if he had wanted to he couldn't. The shock of Kurt's flashback and the venom in every word he was saying froze his spine. The fear of the outcome paralysed him, he could feel his heart pounding in his chest, he could see Kurt coming onto him. He had no idea what to say or what to do. Nothing could change things now. He had no other choice than to try and fix what was left to fix, if Kurt even gave him the chance to.

"Do you remember that we fought for weeks? We didn't even talk to each other at the end! How could you hide this from me? Did we even get back together?" Kurt looked frantic, the aftershock of the flashback and the realization of what it could imply was pushing him into a state of despair. He was furious and Blaine, not saying a word, was even more infuriating.

"Answer me, Blaine! For once since I woke up at the hospital, just tell me the truth for fuck's sake! Did we even get back together?" Kurt was now yelling, too far gone to even care if the neighbors would overhear them.

"We didn't." Blaine said, his voice barely above a whisper. Kurt laughed bitterly at that and threw his hand in the air.

"Oh, right. So fucking perfect! So let me sum it up. I broke up with you, we never got back together and you pretend for months to be my boyfriend! Are we even friends?!"

"We… The first time I… I visited you at the hospital, that was the first time we… we saw each other since, since the break up." Blaine tried as hard as he could to make eye contact with Kurt and to steady his voice. But he just couldn't. Everything was running out of his reach, he was losing a battle against himself and Kurt's anger; there were no way Kurt would calm down after this. Blaine just waited for the next fit, not ready to hear whatever Kurt had to say.

"Oh my god! You played my pretend boyfriend for months when we hadn't seen each other for years! This was all just a lie. None of this is real." Kurt motioned everything and anything really, just talking about their life for a few months now and all the little things that were theirs. "You pretended to be my boyfriend for what freaking purpose, Blaine? Was one single thing at least almost the truth in all of that?!"

Blaine tried to interrupt Kurt because, yes. So much had been the truth and almost nothing of this was a lie to Blaine anymore, he wanted to reach for Kurt and to sit him down and to explain everything, he wanted to tell him all the things that were right and true. But Kurt didn't even let him talk, continuing his banter.

"So in the end you never even dreamt about us having children or never even wanted to be here! God, did you also fake all your orgasms? Do you even find me attractive?! Do you even love me or was that also a lie? How can you have stood there all those nights and those days going on and on about how much you loved me when you don't even know who I am! I don't even know who I am, Blaine, so tell me, how can you love me when you have no idea what kind of man I am? What was that for you Blaine? A sick little game to see what you could have had but didn't? Or is it a twisted manipulation to break me beyond repair to finally avenge yourself because I broke up with you?!" Kurt was brutal and crude but he couldn't help himself. This was too much. He couldn't bear to face this situation without anger. He knew he should've stayed calm and just given Blaine the silent treatment and just told him to leave. This is what he did with all those people that had made fun of him in high school and for what he knew even after. But this is not how you can expect someone to react when all he knows about his current life and love is just nothing but a hard cold lie.

So Kurt was yelling and screaming everything he had on his chest, maybe mean but for what he knew, the man in front of him hadn't really spared him anything, so why should he?

"You promised, Blaine. You promised me to tell me if I had to remember something important. Don't you think this was important? Or do you think that our relationship or whatever that was wasn't even important enough to be mentioned?! I can't even say what is the truth or what is a lie. Are you even being your real self? Or is this just all pretend 'til I'm all calmed down?"

With every single word Blaine just curled up on himself, his arms wrapped around him protectively. This was even worse than anything he had imagined.

Because even if you can imagine the words, you can never imagine the pain that runs through your body, the cold tone of the man you love, the pounding in your chest and the way every single little word is just like a dagger cutting you over and over.

Blaine was ashamed, of what he did, of how far he let himself fall for the pretense but most importantly for how he was handling the situation right now. Once again he was just standing there, taking it and didn't even try to make it right.

There is nothing to make right, Blaine. You screwed up like you always do. Blaine told himself over and over while Kurt was pacing in the room.

"Who are you? Really, Blaine, who are you? Because I certainly don't recognize the man I used to love in high school. Get out. Get out of my place. You're not welcome anymore. I don't want to see you, I don't want to hear from you. Whatever this was for you: a joke, a play or a way to get back at me for hurting you; whatever this was, it's over. Get out!"

Blaine quickly gathered some of belonging: his keys, his shoes, a coat and his wallet and stepped out of the bedroom. Kurt was waiting, door open.

"Get out." His voice was no longer hysteric, it was icy and menacing. Blaine walked outside of the apartment, turning around to catch the last chance he had to say something and just do something for them and for himself but Kurt violently shut the door without a last word.

Blaine stood in front of the door for ten minutes, waiting for something, anything. Kurt to open it up and slap him, or jump into his arms, telling him that he wanted to talk or anything. Blaine would've taken anything from Kurt. But the door didn't open and Blaine just stood there, watching it. His heart was still pounding in his chest, his legs would not be able to carry him anywhere. He felt like life had been ripped out of his chest and twisted in front of his eyes for the second time in six years.

And it was all his fault. Once again, he had managed to screw things up so badly that he ended up miserable. He left the building slowly, giving Kurt some time if he had second thoughts. But Kurt never came after him and Blaine took the first cab that stopped for him.

Back in the apartment Kurt had fallen down onto the floor, back to the door and was crying. He was crying for the Blaine he had known in high school, for what he thought was true love and was just a lie; he cried for him, for his older self and his new self who had no one in his life. He cried for whatever version of himself because no matter which one he was at the moment, they were all utterly lost and devastatingly alone.

Blaine stumbled into his old place. Well, his and Cooper's place to be exact. He hadn't been there in month and the place wasn't all that clean. He didn't care; nothing was relevant at the moment. Blaine took his phone and dialled Burt's number. Kurt had thrown him out but Blaine knew that he had to ask someone to go check on Kurt, because no matter how bad Blaine felt Kurt must have been even worse.

He didn't get Burt but left a message on the voice mail and hung up. He turned it off and walked to his room. It looked depressing and lifeless, it looked cold and empty. It felt wrong, mostly. Blaine shut the curtains. He didn't want to see the sun, didn't want to hear people outside. He didn't want to know that life was going on when he felt like nothing would ever be alright again. So he shut the curtain and crawled into bed and did what he knew the best. He closed off and cut off everything. He didn't call anyone, he didn't eat, he didn't sleep, he didn't even take time to get rid of his clothes and he lay there, under the blanket in shock, waiting for the heavy stone to settle on his heart, the coldness to take over his body and the hole to burn his chest like he knew would happen.

Outside people were starting their days in the cold February. They were sipping coffee to warm up, meeting loved ones; they were getting ready for the day and meeting each other for breakfast. The day had started with a beautiful dawn that had turned into a promising sunny morning. Life was going on and Blaine couldn't have cared less.

Someone was martyrizing the door. There were no other words for the way to describe the pounding against it. Kurt had waited and hoped that the person behind the door would just give up but apparently that wasn't even an option. So he reluctantly dragged himself around the apartment and opened it. He saw Sebastian standing there and tried to shut it quickly but the man used his leg and foot to stop him. He pushed the door open and let himself in before closing it.

"What the hell do you want?" Kurt spat, looking angrily at the taller man.

Sebastian took a look at his friend and his place. From what he knew the shit storm had happened the day before and obviously had made some damage because the place was a mess. Tissues were scattered everywhere, some food was spilled on the floor, a large box with random stuff that seemed to belong to Blaine was put in a corner… and Kurt. Kurt looked like hell. He had dark circles under his red swollen eyes, probably from the crying, he was wearing stained sweat pants and didn't look like he had taken a shower at all that day. But he was also wearing that dark expression that Sebastian had seen before, a long time ago. The first time Kurt had broken up with Blaine, actually. He looked like someone had just ripped his chest open, took one of his vital organs and squeezed it painfully; like his heart was missing and nothing could replace it.

"I said: what the hell do you want? Are you here to laugh at me now that it's over and I know the truth? Ha-fucking-ha, stupid gay face that can't see whether a man is lying to him or not. Lady face that can't seem able to get a boyfriend and when he thought he had one was just one big fat lie! Go ahead, laugh all you want at my expense, I won't stop you." Kurt turned to go to the kitchen but stopped before turning back to Sebastian.

"You!" Kurt said pointing accusingly at the taller man that had yet to say a word. "Who claimed to be my friend, what the hell stopped you from saying anything? What were you waiting for? Was it like a bet? How long does Hummel take to finally understand what a joke he is and none of this is real? Are you even my friend?" Kurt was back to his previous state of hysteria where nothing made sense and all he could do was yell at the people in front of him.

"Go ahead Smythe, for once in your life, man up and tell me what the fuck you were waiting for?" Sebastian didn't say a word and slapped Kurt hard and right on the cheek. Kurt stood there, shocked by the act.

"Are you going to calm down?" Sebastian asked, waiting for Kurt to realize the state he had been in. It took Kurt a few seconds to get over the initial shock of the slap and then proceed to glare at the man.

"What do you want, Bas?" Kurt said, this time calmly.

"I came here to check on you. Got a phone call from your father. He'll be here in the evening. He said he had some explaining to do."

Kurt just waved at him dismissively and sat down on the couch. He put the blanket on his lap and laid his head on a pillow. He didn't go to sleep and instead stared in front of him. Sebastian knew better than to try to talk to him and he decided to tidy the place instead. Just because Kurt was a mess didn't mean his place had to be as well.

Burt arrived hours later from DC. His face was the image of pain and anxiousness. Sebastian told the man where Kurt was and how he had found him before letting himself out of the building, this wasn't going to be pretty and the Hummel needed time to fix this in family.

"Kurt? Buddy?" Burt heard a muffled noise from the couch and he made his way there, to find a little ball of Kurt. "Hey, there. I'm sorry it took me so much time to get here." Kurt didn't move so Burt sat himself as well as he could on the little space he had on the couch.

"Talk to me kiddo, what happened? All I had was a voicemail from Blaine yesterday evening saying that you remembered and you needed me." Kurt sighed heavily and moved the blanket a little so he could see his father and speak audibly.

"Who did this? Who had that idea?" Burt closed his eyes and scratched his head, taking a deep breath and answering truthfully.

"It was my idea. I asked Blaine to come to the hospital when I saw that you didn't remember anything. The doctor said that anything could trigger your memory in one way or another. I didn't want to take any risks so I did what I thought was right. I didn't know things would escalate like that. You asked Blaine to move in pretty quickly and I didn't know what to do but keep this thing going. Because like I said, the doctor …"

"Told you that anything could trigger my memory. Yes, alright. I got that. But why did you choose this instead of anything else? This was a high school romance, nothing devastating. You could've hidden anything else. So why that?" Kurt's tone had turned harsh and accusing.

"Kurt, your relationship with Blaine was never just a high school romance, it's always been more. Knowing that you didn't have that special thing in your life could've been trigger-y. I did it because I thought it was the right thing to do." Burt tried to explain himself.

"So you told him to pretend to be my boyfriend, to tell me that he loved me and all that jazz until shit hit the fan just for my well-being?" Kurt sat up quickly, making Burt lose his balance for a second. The man sat down more comfortably on the couch and once again tried to explain his motives to his son.

"No, I didn't tell him to do that. I wanted him to be around and to pretend to be your boyfriend, that much is true. But him saying that he loves you and everything else relative to his feelings and actions are from his initiative. But the boyfriend idea was mine. So don't go blaming this on him. The situation is here because of me."

"Well that makes things so much easier then! It's definitely not his fault and completely yours, things are solved, everyone can go home happy! So this is yours and his fault equally, along with everyone that walked by me, knowing me and the situation and didn't say a word. How am I supposed to trust people when you all lied to me about something that important? Do you know what it feels like to be betrayed by everyone you love in your life? I thought we had each other's backs, Dad. What happened to that, huh?"

"Hey there, kiddo. I'm here for you, and I did this for you. Granted, that was probably not my best idea ever but I am a parent. And that means that sometimes I had to make a decision I don't like for my kid's well-being. I'm nothing but human and sometimes I make mistakes, lying to you was one of them and I'm sorry about that. But try to see things from my perspective for a second: if someone says that telling the truth to your child might hurt him, do you take the chance to cause irreparable damage to him? I couldn't Kurt. You're my son and I'll try to protect you even if it's against your own mind. Maybe this wasn't the right thing to do, but I'm not sure telling would've been either."

Kurt puffed and flopped down on the couch, head under his blanket.

"Leave me alone, Dad. I need time. I'm mad at you like never before and I can't lose you too. I can't lose everyone in two days but if you stay around me I'm going to be really mean to you. So just, give me time and leave me alone. You can take my room for tonight if you want, but you're leaving tomorrow morning."

Burt stood up and made his way to the bedroom. He didn't get much sleep that night and imagined all the other things he could've done and how things would've ended if he had chosen one of them.

Blaine barely made it through the week. He wasn't sleeping nor was he feeding himself. Guilt was eating him alive and his old demons were back. The feeling of not being enough, of being so useless that he couldn't get one thing right no matter how hard he tried. He didn't matter, nothing mattered, his best would never be enough. He was bound to be a disappointment no matter what.

He gave the worst Glee class ever. Not being able to teach the student anything and letting them take over the class like he had done before. He had quickly shut himself down, not answering Santana's texts or Jeff and Nick's calls. He was once again dead to the world. He would go to school and go home nothing more, nothing less.

Cooper went back to his place as happy as a man that had been paid to be shirtless around twenty women for six months could be. He had a big smile on his face and knew his agent had something big for him. He entered the flat only to find all the curtains closed even though it was the middle of the afternoon and the place looked like it had been robbed. Or that some homeless guy had decided to use their place. Dirty clothes and maybe clean clothes were hanging from weird places and the dust was so thick on furniture that Cooper could draw clear penises on them. He looked for someone only to find Blaine's room in the dark.

He knew his brother wasn't completely happy but having his room pitch black wasn't common.

"Blainers? I can't see shit, you in there?" Cooper asked tentatively. A muffled sound came from under what seemed to be the bed and Cooper made his way around the room. He couldn't see anything so he decided to open the curtains, this was ridiculous. It was the middle of the day, what the hell was going on? When he turned back to see his brother the man froze. This room was even messier than the rest of the flat. Bottles of alcohol stood everywhere, clothes, sheets of papers, tissues. The room was a mess.

Cooper got to the bed and tried to pick under the blanket to see if his brother was even alive. Blaine looked up at him and Cooper for the first time in his life understood how unhappy Blaine was. For the first time in his life he knew what desperation and self-loathing looked like. He decided to save those images in his head, for when he'll have to play a part that needed those emotions, and gently tucked Blaine's curls behind an ear.

"Hey baby bro. What happened to you?"

"I messed up, once again. Like always."

"What are you talking about?" Cooper waited for an answer but nothing came. He stayed there, not knowing what to do and awkwardly petted his brother's head for several minutes. Blaine didn't talk to him, didn't make a sound and Cooper found himself completely lost.

A loud crash came from the door and Blaine didn't even flinch. Then Cooper heard a high pitched voice screaming in Spanish and promising to cut someone balls off from what he gathered.

Santana barged into Blaine's room only to meet a scared Cooper Anderson and a Blaine/blanket burrito.

"What the hell, Anderson? I had to learn from Hummel himself half an hour ago that shit got real and that he knew about the break up. What the fuck happened to you during a week?" The only answer she got was an awkward smile from Cooper. She moved to the bed and saw exactly what Cooper had before - Blaine was a mess.

"Are you fucking kidding me? What the fuck do you think you're doing, Anderson?" Cooper pointed at himself and asked bewildered.

"Me?"

"Who else, genius? Yes, you! You call yourself a big brother but the only one big thing you've got is your ego! When the fuck did you last call him? I bet my breast implants you have no idea what is going on here! Just go get ice cream or another chair for your ego and come back when you'll be useful for something else than stealing my oxygen." Cooper didn't move instantly, confused by the situation. His inactions just made the girl angrier; "Just move already!"

Cooper finally got the use of his legs back and got out of the room. The Latina made her way around the bed and went under the blanket like she could; she engulfed Blaine in a tight hug and didn't say a thing. If there was one thing that she learned from the last time Blaine had been dead to the world it was that all he needed was time and someone to hear him when he was ready. It didn't mean that the girl wasn't worried for her favorite Hobbit though.