"Wow." Rachel said. "It hasn't changed a bit, has it?" 

Kurt looked around the hallway filled with lockers. Last period had started and they were on their way to the choir room to surprise the New Directions.

He shook his head. "No. Not one bit." He realized this is where Blaine still went to; every school day he walked here.

Rachel's dads had picked them up in Cincinnati and his own father was picking them up to go home, preferably with Blaine so he could still spend an evening with him, catching up, but up first on the schedule was to barge in during rehearsals.

Rachel chattered a bit on and Kurt zoned her out, focusing on their way through McKinley without being caught.

"Here we are." he whispered as they approached the all familiar door, but it sounded surprisingly empty inside. Both of them frowned at the abandoned room, chairs still stacked as they used to and the piano in the corner, but no Brad behind it.

"That's weird." Rachel said confused. "You're sure they still have rehearsals at this time?"

"Positive." he answered, grabbing down to his phone to almost actually call Blaine until a familiar voice stopped him from doing that.

"Kurt?"

They turned around to see Mr. Schue staring at them just as biased as they were.

"Rachel?" he said even more astonished. His eyes went from Rachel to Kurt and Kurt shrugged at the weirdness of it. He couldn't blame Mr. Schue of questioning why the hell they were hanging out together, because truth be told - Kurt didn't know either.

"Mr. Schuester!" Rachel squealed. "Where is everybody? We wanted to surprise -"

"We're in the auditorium today," Mr. Schue said, "why are you -"

"Come on!" Rachel cut him off and tugged at Kurt's sleeve to drag him toward the auditorium. She seemed to get giddier with every step they took and Kurt just let her, numbed by the idea that in the auditorium Blaine was sitting, waiting for one of his fellow glee-clubbers to perform. Maybe he should sneak up behind him and poke him. He would probably jolt up, yell at whomever was behind him and then ‘Surprise!'. Yes, excellent, Kurt thought with a promising smirk on his face.

He followed Rachel into the darkened room where on stage only one spotlight in the middle was shining and no microphone or something for singing was to be found. Even the band was tucked away in the dark.

His attention went to the three rows halfway the first section of chairs, filled with the new and some old members of the New Directions. They were talking and fooling around, waiting for something to begin and probably waiting for Mr. Schue as well.

"Go." Mr. Schue whispered behind him, pushing him toward a row higher than the others were sitting. He looked back questioning, but Mr. Schue shook his head. "They're almost starting," and the first tones of a guitar playing were already filling the auditorium, "sit."

He sat between Rachel and Mr. Schue, but kept his eyes on the three rows in front of him. There was no sign of dark, gelled curls anywhere. He searched around again and stated that also Tina was gone.

He turned to Mr. Schue. "Where's Blaine?" he whispered.

Mr. Schue stared at him surprised, wondering how he would know Blaine, but before he could answer someone was walking into the middle of the stage.

"There." he answered softly and nodded at the person entering the spotlight.

Kurt snapped back to the stage, feeling his breath falter as indeed Blaine was coated with the smoky light from the spotlight. That sneaky bastard, he had said he wasn't going to sing! He wanted to grin, but realized that Blaine wasn't carrying a microphone with him - he was carrying his violin.

The constant intro stopped for a second before resuming and Blaine raised his instrument, tucking it underneath his chin and started to play. His eyes were closed with concentration, letting the notes flow into the audience and Kurt was wondering if he was only going to play, but a female singing voice accompanying Blaine already answered his thought.

"All I know... is that you're so nice." He perked up, trying to locate the voice whom he recognized as Tina's, but it was only Blaine in the middle of stage, playing to the song - no, he was playing the song. "You're the nicest thing I've seen." It wasn't about the voice, it was about Blaine, this was his song.

"I wish that we... could give it a go... See if we could be something." Kurt decided to let go of his thoughts and focused on the song and Blaine instead. "I wish I was, your, favorite girl." If he remembered the weekly lesson correctly it was about showing your feelings through song. "I wish you thought I was the reason you are in the world." Blaine flinched at that sentence, pursing his lips as if he was trying to keep them from quivering. "I wish my smile was your favorite kind of smile. I wish the way that I dressed was your favorite kind of style... I wish you couldn't figure me out, but you always wanna know what I was about."

Blaine's hauls turned faster and harder, soaking in the emotions. "I wish you'd hold my hand. When I was upset." His arm turned slower again, as if he knew very well what the next line was. "I wish you'd never forget... the look on my face when we first met..." Kurt sucked in a breath, suddenly overwhelmed by the meaning of the song and Blaine kept on playing. "I wish you had a favorite beauty spot, that you loved secretly 'cause it was on a hidden bit that nobody else could see..."

Kurt watched Blaine open his eyes at the following sentence and even from his distance he could see that his eyes had watered up with tears.

"Basically... I wished that you loved me."

Next to him he heard Rachel's breath coming out in shudders and Mr. Schue had turned into a complete statue. Kurt couldn't resist leaning forward, closer to Blaine, closer to the song and he kept on trying to figure out why Blaine was playing it.

"I wish that you needed me, I wish that you knew when I said two sugars actually I meant three." Tina's voice grew harsher and so did Blaine's violin playing, going higher in range and shriller in tone. "I wish that without me your heart would break. I wish that without me you'd be spending the rest of your nights awake."

Did that mean Blaine had found the man he would give up Juilliard for? Kurt's mouth slowly fell open at the realization: Blaine was in love. And the man in question was not loving him back.

"I wish that without me you couldn't eat. I wish I was the last thing on your mind before... you went to sleep..."

Kurt had no idea who Blaine was referring to, but he hated him already - how could someone not love Blaine back? How, how dared he.

"Look, all I know is that, you're the nicest thing I've ever seen..." Blaine stopped playing for a second as the song came to an end. "And I wish that we could see if we could be something..." The low sound of his violin returned softly and stretched out. "Yeah, I wish that we could see if we could be something..."

The taps on the violin turned more persistent and a few other violins in the back with the band played along, causing a dissonant collaboration with Blaine, whose body was rigid at screeching out his feelings.

He played out the last tone and separated the bow from his violin with force. His eyes were on the floor, staring down at a small spot where a few tears had been shed. He looked up once at the room and the people, nodding in acknowledgement of the small applause, as everybody was still in shock of the performance.

A small girl stood up in the middle, reaching out to Blaine and Kurt recognized Sugar's voice saying "Blainey?", but Blaine shook his head and started to walk to the wings opposite where Tina was appearing on stage.

"Blaine." she said, trying to call him back but Blaine was already gone. Something had happened, Kurt realized, seeing Tina's face completely worried.

"I need to -" he started to get up and Rachel was protesting.

"Kurt? What are you doing?" she asked, but Kurt was too much in his own mind of go to Blaine.

He shuffled in front of her seat, moving faster once he was free and jogged out of the auditorium the way Blaine went and knew exactly where he would exit.

Blaine was used to performing. Used to the stress, the high of it, but never in his life had he had this kind of aftermath.

His heart was practically beating out of his chest, pounding against his ribs and requesting freedom. Blaine actually stroked over the place where his heart was lying underneath, trying to calm it down and to see if he wasn't having a heart attack.

The song had turned him into ruins.

He was used on getting lost into the music - he was a composer, but never had he felt to be somewhere else while playing a normal popsong. He had envisioned half of the previous months, every time he saw Kurt and every time he had the urge to just tell him his feelings.

Blaine didn't want to settle for just friends anymore. He wanted Kurt, now more than ever.

He was pacing around the hall, thanking God it was empty as only a few classrooms were located there. His violin was discarded in the wings, not even in his case and Blaine almost went back to storage him correctly, but a voice yelled his name.

A voice he hadn't heard in real life in weeks. A voice he hadn't expected to hear these days.

He turned around to see if he wasn't going crazy, that it wasn't the pressure of the song and the emotions that was making him hear things, but when he turned around it was really Kurt that stopped only a few feet in front of him.

"Blaine." he panted, as if he had ran a bit and Blaine was still in complete and utter shock. "Are you alright?"

For the first time since what felt ages, he took a breath. "Kurt." he gasped.

Kurt wanted to grin, he saw that little quirk at the corner of his mouth but apparently decided it wasn't right to give a smile and instead his face turned worried.

"Are you alright?" he repeated and Blaine was sure he wasn't alright at all. Kurt was here. Kurt was actually here and - and oh my God, what if - what if he was there while he was playing? He was having a panic attack, he felt it.

"That - ," Kurt smiled comforting, "that was one hell of a song, wasn't it?"

Blaine felt his body collapse, but managed to stay on his feet. His hands went up to his head, knotting the gelled curls as he wished a hole would appear in the ground to disappear in.

"Jesus," Kurt muttered, trying to reach out but Blaine stepped back quickly, almost too quickly because he stumbled on his feet. "That's a real jerk of a man if he gets to you that bad."

"Oh my God." Blaine breathed worn-out. He had no idea it was about him, he had no idea, he still didn't know -

"Seriously, I can't believe people can be that blind -"

He didn't know, he had absolutely no idea -

"But you played it gorgeously, maybe you should play it for him -"

No idea that - "It was about you!" Blaine blurted out. "The song - the song - it's about you! And you still have no idea, oh my GOD! The song was about you, I'm in love withyou!" He slapped his hand up to cover his mouth but the damage was already done.

Kurt felt his heart beating against his chest and blood was rushing in his head, muffling his hearing.

"What?" he breathed unbelievingly. Blaine was touching his face as if he was checking if this was real, as if this wasn't a dream and it was that Kurt knew he was real, otherwise he would be questioning it too. "You -"

"I can't believe it," Blaine muttered to himself, not even looking at Kurt, "I can't believe I said it. Oh my God." He started to pace around, never looking at Kurt, just touching himself, pulling at his cardigan and muttering over and over that he couldn't believe it.

Kurt was using the moment to sink it all in. Blaine was in love with him. Blaine was in love with him.

"Wha-" he breathed and Blaine finally looked up. Kurt searched out his eyes, locking them with his before continuing. "You're - what, how?"

"I'm in love with you." Blaine said almost breakable, but his posture turned relieved. "I've - so long, Kurt, so long."

"Why -" How? When? "Why didn't you tell me?" Kurt nearly thought his voice was only air and the words were barely hearable.

"I couldn't really tell you with Cooper's tongue down your throat. Fuck!" Blaine threw his arms up and covered his face. "This isn't how it's supposed to go, this isn't how I wanted it -"

"But -" Kurt wanted to ask so many questions, but he was still bewildered with even just the thought of Blaine loving him.

"Forget what I said." Blaine suddenly said. "Forget it, I never said it. Please forget it, please go." he pleaded.

"You can't expect me to -" Kurt said harsher than he meant. "This, this is very -" he searched the word in his head, "Unexpected."

Blaine let out a huff, it was almost a laugh and he saw tears piling up in his eyes again.

"Really?" he said with his voice thick. "You really had no idea?"

Kurt shook his head slowly, causing Blaine to cry and laugh even more.

"Kurt," he said with a soft voice, "I've been in love with you for almost four months now, three months and twenty days if we're being exact and every single day of it I hated myself for being in love, but I couldn't help it. I'm in love with you. Ever since you sang Black Bird - that was - that was a moment for me, about you." He tilted his head, lips trembling and eyes red rimmed. "And every day I, uhm," he looked away for a second before turning back, looking Kurt straight in the eye as he had found his words.

"It's like the song said." He smiled watery. "Basically, I wished that you loved me."

Both of them let out a shuddering sigh and Kurt had no idea how to reply. He was confused, overwhelmed, feeling all kinds of things and Blaine was just staring at him with that hopeful, yet broken and relieved, look.

"I, uhm, i-it's -" Kurt stuttered, unable to properly form sentences and Blaine's shoulders were already slumping in disappointment.

"The concert," Blaine suddenly said, "the concert is on April tenth at the Alice Tully Hall. It starts at eleven in the morning. I'm up first."

Kurt stared at him even more confused - why was he bringing this up now?

"Maybe then you'll understand." he added and turned around to walk away at the same time the bell rang.

"Blaine!" Kurt shouted, but the hall was already overflowing with students from the few classrooms. "Blaine!" he yelled even harder, but Blaine had walked away.

"Kurt?" Rachel called and he twirled around. "Your dad's here."

His father was standing next to Rachel, not looking at him but at the crowd where Blaine had disappeared in. Without saying anything he launched himself onto his dad, clutching into the hug and familiar smell, but only one thought occupied his mind:

Blaine loves me. Blaine loves me.

Blaine. Loves. Me.

[Voicemail]

"Blaine... pick up."

"You can't just say things like that and thinking it never happened, talk to me!"

"Why - why don't you just explain? Blaine?"

"Sir?"

Blaine looked up and lowered his phone, seeing a flight attendant with a kind face. She had a little smile playing on her lips and was definitely trying to comfort him. Not that he could blame her: he was looking like a complete mess and he wouldn't be surprised if she had mistaken it for fear of flying.

"Yes?" he replied.

"I'm going to have to ask you to turn off your phone, take off will be soon." She shrugged at the policy.

"Yes, yes, of course." He fiddled with the phone and didn't look up again until the jingle that indicated it was switched off mused through the plane.

"Thank you." the flight attendant said with a smile. "If you need anything you can call for me." She nodded at the button above his head before heading off.

Blaine rested his head against the rest of his seat, slowly tuning out the people around him and praised there were no small children on his flight. He rolled his head to the side to see Columbus Airport at the crack of dawn and sighed a bit.

There was still a part of his mind that couldn't believe that he had actually told Kurt his feelings and the way Kurt had reacted was even harder to believe. For all these months, Kurt hadn't noticed Blaine once. Not in the way Blaine wanted anyway.

He also couldn't believe that he told Kurt the date of the concert. That one last personal thing he owned and he just blurted it all out just like his feelings. A sigh escaped his mouth and he tightened the seatbelt around his waist even more so the strap was almost cutting his flesh. There was always a chance Kurt wouldn't come to the concert.

What if he didn't want to be friends anymore after this? What if he screwed it all up? He imagined going to Juilliard next year, all of a sudden knowing no one in New York and then one day he would see Kurt walking across the street, probably hand in hand with a man similar to his brother and wouldn't spare a moment looking at Blaine.

"Please come to the concert." he muttered his breath, realizing telling Kurt in music was the only way he could fully tell Kurt how he felt. Same with the song he did yesterday.

"Good morning this is your captain speaking, and welcome to Republic Airlines to LAX, we will have one stop in Charlotte..."

"Let me explain." He started to drift off after a sleepless night.

"We wish you a very nice flight."

"Kurt?" Carole's voice sounded muffled through his door and instead of answering, Kurt just stared at it. He felt like he hadn't slept at all, pondering every second, waiting for his phone to beam up with any kind of response from Blaine.

‘I'm in love with you.'

But why? How?

"Kurt?" Carole asked again and knocked a bit. "Come on, dear, let's have some breakfast."

‘Basically I wished you loved me.'

The door screeched open a tad and the motherly eye of Carole peaked through the crack. Her face was a whirlwind of concern and it wasn't really surprising as Kurt barely said three words to them since he came back home.

All he did was randomly seeking for hugs at both his dad and stepmother.

"Sweetie, what's wrong?" she asked and Kurt couldn't answer. He watched her enter his room without permission, sinking down next to him on the bed and pulled his hand from his stomach to knead it comforting. "Your dad is really worried." Her voice was soft and he was already reaching up to hug her from behind. "Oh honey, is it Cooper?"

He shook his head, but also wanted to nod. He didn't know what was wrong anymore because everything seemed wrong.

"Is school being too rough on you?"

"No." he said softly. School had been great.

"Burt told me you were visiting McKinley with Rachel, did she say something?" Another shake of his head. Nobody could guess what was wrong with him because he was barely understanding what had taken place.

‘The song was about you, I'm in love with you.'

"Did someone in Glee club do something? Were there any bullies because since your father introduced the policy there had been no new incidents."

"It's none of that."

"You know I'm trying to help you, right?" Carole snorted a bit. "And letting me keep on guessing wrong things we'll never reach the point where I help."

"You're already helping." He tightened his grip a bit in the hug. For a moment they stayed quiet and Kurt sighed. "Dad's going crazy with worry downstairs, isn't he?"

"Yes." She hummed. "He's also in stress because the boy that usually works on Saturdays in the shop is gone for the break."

"But -" Kurt looked at his clock which was already nearing eleven. "Shouldn't he be working then?"

"Guess who made him worry that much he didn't dare to go to the shop?"

"Oh my -" Kurt started to untangle himself, slipping into a warm sweater to compensate his thin pajamas and rubbed his eyes. Carole was staring at him with her loving smile, waiting for him to be done so they could go downstairs together.

In the kitchen sat Burt, staring at the paper more than actually reading it and Kurt threw his arms around him.

"H-hey!" his dad grumbled surprised, trying to mask his worry as Kurt knew he always did.

"Toast?" Carole asked and Kurt sat down on his usual spot under the watching eye of his dad.

"Please." Kurt answered, promptly ignoring his dad's look. There was no use of explaining what happened, nobody knew who Blaine was and why this was affecting him so much. What if Blaine was going to avoid him for the rest of his life? What if he was scared to get his heart broken?

He sighed, accepting the plate with bread.

"So," Carole ended the silence and sat down herself, "there's a little market downtown today, why don't we go there? Just the three of us?"

Burt stared at his son insinuatingly, waiting for him to say something and Kurt shrugged.

"Okay." He chewed away his piece of toast. "Will the shop be okay?" he asked his dad and it was Burt's turn to shrug.

"It'll be fine." he grunted, still staring as if he was waiting for Kurt to just spill, but he didn't feel like explaining his all-of-a-sudden complicated lovelife.

"Well good!" Carole squealed. "I need some styling advice from my favorite fashionista." She winked. "We'll leave in an hour, okay?"

Both men replied with silence.

---

An hour later Kurt sat in the backseat of the trusted car of his dad, watching Lima pass by him through the window and sighing every few minutes. He felt the eyes on him in the rear-window and at one point he wanted to tell his dad to watch the road, but he didn't feel like snapping.

Once they arrived at the picturesque market, Burt and Carole slipped their hands together in automatism and Kurt stared at it fondly.

"Oh, scarves!" Carole exclaimed and for the next half an hour Kurt was being spoiled with all kinds of pretty things. Normally he would never buy things on a market, but the fact his parents were making an effort to cheer him up made him cave.

Between stands he would slip his hand into his pocket and see if there was already any kind of sign of life from Blaine, but then remembered he was probably on a plane to visit his family and he had no idea how long he was flying.

Dad and Carole were talking to some acquaintances they ran into and Kurt didn't feel like mingling into their talk. He was staring down the stands that were yet to come and something sparkling caught the corner of his eye - jewelry, he thought with a squeak.

"Dad?" He walked to the small group of people and his dad turned around. "I'll be there, okay?" He pointed at the stall.

After receiving a small nod, Kurt walked across the path to the stand with shiny items. With a small smile he observed all the pretty things on display.

The girl behind the table waved off a different customer before turning to Kurt. "Let me know if you see something, okay?" She had an eyebrow piercing and seemed rather protective of the board with about a dozen brooches pinned on them. He walked to them, curious as he was.

There were several shapes and somehow they seemed familiar in style. He looked up to the girl whom seemed happy he noticed the pins.

"These are very pretty." he said and she smiled even wider.

"Thanks, made them myself!" she said proudly.

His eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Wow. Impressive."

"I -" she started and searched under the table for something, "I have a catalogue, if you're interested?" She seemed so hopeful while holding out the catalogue that Kurt couldn't say no and accepted it. "Some of them are already sold because I made the catalogue like last year, but if you really like them I can remake them, but I like to stick to originals."

Kurt gave a smile and flipped through the catalogue. A page with animal brooches popped up and he gasped, almost shutting the book immediately, but he was petrified to the ground. On the left page was a bird-shaped pin, black with a feather and some rhinestones.

"See something you like?" the girl asked giddy, misinterpreting his reaction.

"This one." He turned around the book and pointed at the bird. The bird pin that look too much like his.

"Oh, I'm sorry I already sold that one in December. Actually it was the first pin I ever sold!" she said apologizing. "But if you like it -"

"You sold this in New York?" he demanded to know and the girl's eyes popped wide.

"Wow, no man, I work in a shop in Westerville Mall. I mean, selling them in New York would be great -"

He ignored her and reached down to his bag, rumbling through the new bought things and eventually he found his wallet. With shaking hands he zipped open a compartment, hoping he was seeing it all wrong and that it was a complete different pin.

But as soon as he revealed the pin, the girl started to hyperventilate and jump up and down. He placed down the pin next to the picture and yes - they were exactly the same.

"Oh my God!" the girl said and was still jumping. "You're the guy! You're the guy!"

"What guy?" he asked shocked. The girl snatched the pin from the catalogue to study it better.

"It's really it, oh wow."

"What. Guy?" he repeated with his teeth clenching together and the girl stopped jumping, staring at him astonished. It was as if he had the last golden ticket or so it felt.

"The guy he was buying it for. I would never forget my very first costumer, he was so adorable and cute -"

Adorable? Cute? Not the first words that would pop into his mind when describing Cooper or - "Wait. You didn't sell this in New York."

"No, silly, I already told you. I sold this baby back in December in Westerville. Gosh, that guy was so sweet - are you two still together?" she asked curiously and her smile faded when he shook his head. "But - he was so nice and cute with his curls and he was so shy it was -" she sighed and Kurt thought he was going crazy. "It was such a romantic story of the pin." she muttered on.

"Curls?" he asked and the girl looked up again.

"Yeah?" She stared at him with a not understanding look and Kurt wasn't connecting the dots either until his heart started to pound the same way it did yesterday. Yesterday when Blaine told him he loved him.

"How tall was he?"

Her eyebrows shot up. "Woah! It's been a long time, all I remember was his adorable face when he said it was for someone special." she said raising her hands in surrender. "It was for someone he loved." Her face grew softer at remembering the moment and Kurt was officially panicking.

Blaine could've bought the pin on Cooper's behalf. It was possible, right? By all means - they were brothers, but if Blaine had chosen it -

"I need to make a phone call." he said suddenly, grabbing down to his phone and automatically checked if there was already a message from Blaine but no such luck. With his hands quivering like a mess, he dialed a number he hadn't dialed in a month.

"Kurt?" Cooper picked up with, his voice shocked and it was throwing Kurt even more down the emotional pit. "Kurt? Is that you?"

"Cooper."

"Oh my God, Kurt! I'm so happy you called -"

"The pin. The Christmas present ." Kurt interrupted. "Did you - did Blaine buy it for you?"

Cooper remained silent. On the background Kurt could hear a voice-over and there were a lot of people, meaning he was in a crowded place.

"Yes." he finally breathed and Kurt almost dropped his phone.

"But -" he swallowed loudly, "but it was your choice right? The pin? You picked it, right? And - and Blaine simply got it for you, right?"

Cooper turned quiet again and Kurt could hear an announcement of an incoming flight. Was he at an airport?

"No." Cooper answered truthfully and Kurt could just feel his heart break, the crack was almost hearable. "Blaine picked it out. I asked him to get something, but he picked it out."

Kurt's breath hitched and in the middle of the path his heart crumbled down.

"Kurt?" Cooper called, but he didn't respond. "Kurt, please talk to me, you can't just call me and -"

"Bye, Cooper." he said coldly and hung up, quieting the protests.

With his legs feeling like they were made of bricks, he returned to the stand, taking the pin back from the girl with the eyebrow piercing, who was looking at him concerned.

"Thank you." he said and returned the pin in the compartment of his wallet.

"Are you okay?" the girl asked.

"I think your romantic story of the pin has turned a bit more complicated." he simply said.

---

Blaine pushed the carriage with his suitcase through the doors of arrivals, immediately searching the crowd for his brother.

"Blainey!" a voice called and he tried to find the source, walking through the mass of people until he finally spotted his brother on the side, and he wasn't looking so good.

Cooper was hugging him even before he could let go of his carriage.

"Woah! Are you okay?"

They pulled back and Blaine noticed the red rims in Cooper's eyes while he was shaking his head.

"No." he said with a broken voice.

"What's wrong? What happened?" he asked concerned, stroking Cooper's arm to comfort him. Cooper stared at him, biting his lip in hesitation.

"Kurt called." he eventually admitted and Blaine felt his heart sink and pound harder at the same time.

"What - what did he say?"

Cooper licked his dry-seeming lips and shuddered.

"I think it's really over." he choked. "I don't think he'll ever want me back."

Kurt rolled the small pin around in his hands, remembering every little detail about it. Blaine bought this, he thought, and brought it to his house - hid it even underneath the tree to help out his brother.

He sighed deeply, sitting on the couch in the living room. It had been three days since he found out Blaine did a little more than just be his friend and Kurt would be lying if he said he had been sleeping well for the past days.

Late at night he stared at his ceiling, imagining the entire Friday night in his head how it could have gone differently. What could have happened if Blaine hadn't walked away. Perhaps they would have talked, gone back to Kurt's house and Blaine would have blushingly told him things - maybe even revealing the story of the pin himself.

But Blaine didn't stay. Blaine wasn't even in Westerville anymore and remembering Cooper was on an airport made him realize Blaine was probably in Los Angeles now.

"Why won't you call?" he muttered at his phone on the table.

Kurt had also gone through memory lane to search for any kind of hint that Blaine really was in love with him that whole time, but that only led to other things.

Like Blaine's eyes, smoldering at any kind of little happy thing like biscotti with his coffee and how beautiful they were after he had gotten into Juilliard.

Or his lips, breaking his entire face to pure cheerfulness when he smiled and how soft they seemed. Kissable, even.

Kurt dropped his head against the rest of the couch. Why was he thinking these things? He had never realized them before. That's because you've always seen him as Cooper's little brother, a friend - nothing more.

It would be wrong, right? Too soon?

"Impossible." he breathed.

"I'm back!" his dad shouted from the hall after doing some groceries. He wanted to shout back he was in the living room, but couldn't get his voice to do so.

His dad entered the living room with a bag, looking down to Kurt on the couch and he sighed. "Right where I left you."

Kurt bit away a smile: he could appreciate his dad's humor if it wasn't so pathetic he hadn't moved in two hours. He watched him disappear in the kitchen, dropping off the bags and returned to the living room.

He plopped down onto his chair, leaning forward instantly toward Kurt and sighed again.

"Does this have to do with a guy?"

Kurt raised an eyebrow  - he said guy, not specifically Cooper as he expected.

"You saw him." he stated and his dad nodded.

"He didn't look that well either."

"He's Cooper's little brother." Kurt told him. "He - he's very dear to me."

"I thought so, can't imagine you sulking here if he wasn't."

"He - he said some things I wasn't expecting." Kurt's breath came out shuddering, reliving the moment once again.

"And how did you respond to that?"

He shrugged, feeling guilty about how it had gone. "I didn't know what to say."

"You're not lingering him on, are you?" Burt stared at him intently and Kurt's jaw dropped.

"Dad! How do you - what are you even saying?"

"I'm saying that you don't know what he's been through."

"And you do?" Kurt snapped, regretting it almost instantly.

"All I'm telling you is to look beyond the surface. Sitting here doing nothing won't get you to the part where everything makes sense."

"He didn't even explain! He walked away!" Kurt felt his face become red hot, angry that his dad was messing with things he didn't even know. He didn't even know who Blaine was and was still picking his side and all of a sudden he was wondering how much his dad had heard of his conversation with Blaine.

His dad was starting to stand up, stretching himself before walking around the couch and stood behind him, resting his hand on Kurt's shoulder.

"You didn't run after him, either." He squeezed his shoulder a bit and walked away.

Blaine watched the sun set from the balcony of Cooper's temporary apartment. He would move out next week to live in his trailer on set and start filming his movie, which turned out to be that secret and coded that not even Cooper could tell him what movie.

The week in L.A. was almost over. Today it had been a week since he told Kurt the truth and the following days he had been Cooper's distraction, visiting every touristy thing possible.

Cooper hadn't said a word about Kurt after Saturday. Instead they went to the beach at Venice and simply relaxed, went to all the restaurants instead of cooking as the movie-production company was financing everything and late at night they were boo-ing at bad romantic comedies.

He sucked in a breath through his noise, sniffing in the smell that had made him awfully relax the last couple of days.

A door shut behind him and when he turned around, Cooper walked in with a smile on his face and a box in his hands.

Blaine chuckled at the foolish grin and the overall giddiness of his brother. "What's that?" He nodded at the box as Cooper walked toward the balcony to join him.

"Haaaaaaaaaaappy birthday!" he drawled and Blaine looked down the box Cooper was handing out with a smile.

"But I - I thought. Cooper, my birthday isn't until next week."

Cooper shrugged it off. "And I'm not there next week, so - take it!"

He shuffled the box a bit, hearing there was nothing loose inside and out of pure curiosity, Blaine took over the box and started to unwrap the paper.

The box underneath was white and Cooper kept on pushing him to open it. After a lot of turning around, the white box ended on the floor with the paper and a beautiful sand-colored notebook with music-notes all over and a band with a button keeping it closed was left in his hands.

"I thought it would be handy! For in New York, I mean." Cooper said with an enthusiastic voice. "Look." He took over the book and Blaine watched him undo the button with practiced ease. The paper inside was thick and had musical staffs already printed on. "That way you don't have to draw the lines yourself, because you're all askew in your old notebook."

Blaine froze. How did Cooper know that?

"And see," he pointed up the page, "here you can write the working title and original title. So you don't have to scribble it on the sideline."

Blaine kept on standing still and Cooper shut the notebook with clap. "Cooper -"

"You've always been better in showing your feelings through music and although I must confess I'm not world's best musical reader, that little piece you called Kurt did say a lot."

He looked at Blaine all knowingly and Blaine swallowed loudly.

"I needed inspiration for your gift so I went through your stuff when you were showering." Cooper sounded a little bit guilty for doing that. "I guess I should've expected it."

"You're - I'm, I just - you're -"

"Not mad?" Cooper finished his sentence, cocking an eyebrow. "Of course I was."

Blaine felt his blood run the marathon through his body and he could hear his heart pounding in his head.

"Can you," Cooper said, "just so I know I didn't interpret it wrong, tell me how you really feel about Kurt?"

He felt like he was in a game show and the next question was a trick question, but Blaine was sick of lying, keeping things secret and after taking a deep breath, he told his brother the truth: "I'm in love with him."

Cooper let his head down, resting his chin on his chest and started to slowly nod.

"Thanks," he muttered, "for not lying."

"Cooper, you must know that I never wanted it to happen - it just... did." Blaine finally found his tongue again and was willing to risk everything to make it right.

"Do you know I miss him?" Cooper ignored what he said. "Every single day since he walked out of my apartment, I miss him." He looked up at Blaine. "And every time I miss him I think of all the things I could have done differently. He knows you bought the Christmas present."

Blaine started to breathe faster. "What? When?"

"He found out Saturday. Right before you landed." Cooper held his head down again. "That's when I realized it would never happen. It would never work again. Because of you."

Blaine was on the verge of breaking down in tears, devastated by the things that were currently happening.

"I am so sorry." he babbled.

"It would never work again," Cooper said, "because I'm not you."

"I never wanted that to happen -"

"Blaine? Shut up for a second." His eyes pierced through Blaine and he snapped his mouth shut. Cooper turned to put the notebook on a small table on his balcony before continuing. "I feel like - no, I know I've done everything wrong. I feel like I didn't respect him. I just wanted it to work so badly, even long-distance, that I forgot he might have had a say in it too."

"But -"

"I don't deserve him."

"What?" Blaine broke his requested silence. "You can't say things like that, of course you deserve him! He's wonderful and you're the best brother I could imagine. I wish it never happened, that - that I fell in love and I got so fed up with the feelings inside that I wrote it down in music. You can never say things like that, you need to know you deserve all kinds of things!"

Cooper stared at him with a watery smile. "So you do." he added softly.

"But I don't care about me if I get see you and Kurt happy together!" he shouted.

A silence fell and the sun was almost below the horizon.

Blaine was panting at the intensity of what he was saying, throwing all his thoughts of him and Kurt together away to do the right thing. "You and Kurt are the most important people in my live, why should I care about me if it means you're happy? I can make my own happiness."

Without a warning Cooper hung himself around Blaine in a hug, rocking him side to side while choking out tiny breaths in the process. "I can make my own happiness too." he mumbled. "And I want someone to make you happy for once." He pulled back, forcing Blaine to stare him in the eye. "You've always been the brave one, sacrificing every little part of you and I wish for you to be selfish, just once."

"But - you and, what about you?"

"I don't think Kurt will ever forgive me. I said stupid things, Blaine. And why would he consider me if there is you?"

"He knows." Blaine whispered. "He knows I love him and he didn't say a thing."

Cooper licked his lips before saying the hardest words he would ever say. "He'll catch up with his true feelings. And when that happens, don't feel guilty because of me." He wrapped Blaine into a hug again. "Just so you know. You're my most important person too." Blaine choked out a sob and Cooper rubbed his back soothingly. "We're more than just brothers. We're friends too. You can't let me stand in your way to happiness."

"But what about you?"

"You've been taking care of me for the most of your life, you know that? You made me do the right things, coming out. You always inspired me to follow my dreams and I couldn't wait for you to find your way out of that hell hole called Westerville and you did. And what did I to make that happen? Nothing. What did you do? You sang every night with me to prepare me for my Tisch audition, you even spell-checked my letters." He pulled back, resting his hands on his shoulders. "But I'm supposed to be the older brother."

Blaine let out a shuddering breath, eyes filled with tears. "You are the older brother."

"Then let me be one." he said seriously.

They stood like that for a few minutes.

"I'm sorry you had to find out like that." Blaine said apologizing.

Cooper shrugged. "It was better than to find out during Thanksgiving. Imagine how awkward that would've be?"

Blaine huffed. "I'm afraid it'll never happen."

"It will." Cooper ruffled Blaine's hair. "Now go change, we need to check out that Indian restaurant."

Blaine nodded and started to walk away when Cooper called him back, holding the notebook in his hands.

"Thanks." he muttered and walked to the bedroom to change his clothing. Cooper remained on the balcony, now leaning forward against the rail, watching over Los Angeles.

Kurt might have been oblivious to Blaine, but Cooper hadn't. He knew his little brother maybe even better than he did himself. He knew every smile, every expression and all his little quirks. Finding the notebook with the pieces of music was only a true confirmation of what he had been fearing.

Not only was Kurt oblivious to Blaine's love, but to his own feelings as well. Cooper had been fighting those thoughts, trying to make it work as best as possible but when he saw Blaine and Kurt together in January, there was no point denying it anymore. He knew Kurt would never love him back as much as he loved Blaine.

He just didn't know it yet.