Nancy's room was very purple. He had told her that a few months ago, but Nancy had shrugged - claiming purple was cool. Kurt couldn't disagree on that - but it was all the same purple, no different shades - he would give his left arm to redecorate her dorm room, but Nancy always started to sing every time he brought it up.

Not that it really mattered now. By all means - he wouldn't care that her room would be green and red clashing each other. He didn't care Nancy didn't take off her make-up before she went to bed, meaning she hadn't moisturized her face. Nothing was worth his worries - he felt completely empty.

Nancy paced when she's on the phone, another thing Kurt noticed. And considering her room was quite small, the paces were quickly made and turned around again.

"He stopped texting before I called you, I think he fell asleep - or passed out," he heard her say, "I've never seen him like this, so sorry for calling you so late - but he kept on saying he needed to call you and then said he shouldn't -"

He shouldn't. He shouldn't have told Nancy to call Blaine, even though he really needed to hear his voice at this point.

"Are you sure?" Nancy stopped pacing and stood still right in front of Kurt, who was lying on her bed. "Okay, just a sec - Kurt?" He looked up, not saying anything. "Blaine says it's okay if you want to talk to him." She held out his phone, Blaine's caller ID flashing a brief second and he took it without really realizing what he was doing.

"Kurt?" He instantly relaxed at the voice, feeling the cold that had been stirring in his blood flood away. "Are you there?"

"Yes." It was nothing more than an airy whisper, but Blaine had heard him.

"What happened?"

"I'm sorry for calling." he sniffed instead of answering. "I shouldn't, it's weird - this is weird right? You're his brother and -"

Blaine shushed him. "You're also my friend. Do you want to talk?"

"Did - did C-Cooper try to call you?" He felt his throat contract at saying the name.

"No, I was sleeping -"

"Sorry! I totally woke you, didn't I?" Panic rose in his body; he disturbed two friends at two in the morning.

"Well, most people sleep at this hour - so why aren't you?" Blaine said it completely calm, no longer trying to get information out of him and Kurt was eternally grateful for that. "Are you staying at Nancy's tonight?"

"I - I don't know." But Nancy answered the question herself by magically finding a big 'I Heart New York' shirt and some sweats which didn't look female. "Yes, I'm staying here." And Nancy nodded at that to confirm again.

"That's good, then try to sleep and turn off your phone, okay? Call me if you need me tomorrow - when you're rested."

Kurt doubted if he would ever be completely rested again.

"O-kay."

"Go to sleep, Kurt." Blaine said soothingly. "Give me back to Nancy and go to sleep."

Kurt whispered a good night before handing the phone back to his friend and accepted the improvised pajamas.

Nancy muttered some things on the phone, ended with a ‘thank you' and switched off his phone completely. Cooper had texted him several times. He had heard the beeping of receiving texts every other minute since he left his apartment, but he had ignored them all.

"Let's go to sleep, pumpkin." Nancy said and waited for him to be changed before they arranged themselves in the small bed. "Everything will be different in the morning."

---

Nothing was different in the morning. The walls were still purple, there was still make-up on Nancy's face and Kurt still felt empty inside.

He took a deep breath without moving too much, swallowing in air and continued to stare at the ceiling. Nancy was still sleeping, but Kurt barely slept at all - he remembered closing his eyes and next moment it was vaguely brighter outside.

It was a few days back when Kurt realized something had changed within his relationship. Cooper had once again intruded the Tisch library and sat across him for a little while before he had placed some folders in front of him.

Kurt had taken them with honest curiosity, but got confused when he realized what they were.

"Are these -"

"Colleges, and internships." Cooper quickly said. "Mostly is acting, but also with singing minors -"

"But, why?" Kurt forced himself to smile. "I go to Tisch. I go here." He made a hand gesture to make his point clear.

"They're summer courses, mostly -"

"In L.A." he suddenly stated, reading in a bit further and realized they were all in Los Angeles. "Cooper, what are you trying to say?"

"Well, if I get the part - I start filming in March and throughout the summer I plan on being in L.A. for the post-production and I was hoping you'd come too -"

"You want me to come to L.A." Kurt echoed. "Cooper, what is this? Did you get the part?"

"I get reply this week and I've been thinking, and I want you to come too -"

"These are very, very expensive, Cooper." Kurt flipped through another folder and something caught his eye. "These ‘summer' courses don't start until September - the new semester starts then, here - in New York, where I go to school -"

"I know that! I'm just trying to make things work."

"No, I can't afford to miss school and this summer I'm going apartment hunting with Nancy, you know that." Kurt sighed annoyed.

"Fine," Cooper stood up but left the folders where they were, "just consider it, okay?" His voice had turned colder, like he was angry and Kurt decided he better just let him be. He didn't want to fight, not now they were days away from the Witchard of Oz casting announcement. The teachers had been mysterious about every aspect - he freaked out when Ms. Shannen had told him to watch his skipping, forgetting it was simply a dance move in the routine they were rehearsing.

Every time he passed the freshmen boards he hoped to see the list hanging. He wanted it to be like a band aid - as quickly over as possible with minimum pain. Or - of course, joy if he'd gotten the part of Dorian.

Nancy had all her savings set on the Cowardly Lion. "I heard if it's a girl they let her wear some kind of furry bra - if that doesn't scream Nancy, then I don't know what does."

In all the stress and expectation Kurt practically forgot about Valentine's Day - not that he wanted to celebrate that. He remembered the horrible slobbering of straight couples at McKinley and promised himself never to do that. Instead they would have an easy night in of chocolate and strawberries - something Kurt supported fully.

But he never expected not to have that quiet night in - ever. The night before the fourteenth Kurt was rudely interrupted during his nightly regime by his phone and picked up with obvious irritation.

"Hello?"

"Uhm, Hi. This is Bart from Red Harbor, the bar -"

"How can I help you?" Kurt softened his voice.

"Does one Cooper Anderson belong to you?"

"Y-yes? Is there something wrong?" He cursed his squeaky voice.

"N'thing, nothing bad - just bar policy, your man took one too many and is trying to teach my guests some kind of acting masterclass and telling us we're not pointing our fingers enough - could you pick him up?"

"Oh my - I am so sorry, of course, can you tell me the address?"

The bar was located close to Cooper's apartment and after a quick change of clothes - because a bathrobe would not do good in the New York night, Kurt found the flashing sign of the Red Harbor.

Outside the bouncer gave him one quick look before brusquely asking: "ID."

"I got a call from Bart, I'm here to -"

"Pick up the actor? Thank God. Because if he tells me to be intense by yelling again, I will show him intense." He let Kurt in before he could respond and the smell of alcohol and sweat welcomed him.

Cooper was bent over the bar, rolling an empty glass in one hand and was hiding his face in his elbow of his other arm.

Kurt crossed his own arms, sighing at the display and was deeply disappointed in his boyfriend.

"Cooper!" he said sharply and the man jumped up at his name. For a moment Cooper stared at him with blurry eyes before he realized who was standing in front of him.

"Kurt!" He got up and wrapped Kurt in a sloppy hug. "How did you get in h're, d'you have a fake ID? That's so hot."

"Okay, Tiger -" Kurt tried to hold him up, but Cooper was practically a dead weight in his arms.

"Here's his wallet and keys," a familiar voice said - it was Bart, the guy who called in the first place, and handed him Cooper's belongings. "I didn't want him to wander around like that."

"Thank you so much." He poked Cooper so he would move - and stop kissing his neck - and guided him to the exit. "Come on, big guy."

"Hey, hey, Kurrrrrrt - " Cooper became even heavier than he already was, maybe he should've called Nancy for help. Outside the bouncer stared them away, but Cooper missed the hint and continued his ‘masterclass' pointers; "Yelling! YELL TO BE INTENSE!"

"Shhh, quiet, honey." Kurt said and it took away Cooper's attention from the bouncer.

The entire trip back to his apartment consisted majorly gropes, kisses and inappropriate compliments that were freaking Kurt out. He's drunk, he thought to himself, but drunk people are also very honest.

"In we go." Kurt unlocked the door and pushed Cooper in. The walk had sobered Cooper up a tad - at least he knew where he was and that Kurt was there, but he remained clingy, taking Kurt back into his arms as soon as he shut the door. Before he could protest, his lips met Cooper's and the stingy alcohol taste was burning his taste buds. A cold hand forced itself underneath the thick layers of his coat and clothing, kneading the firm flesh of his side - it was then when Kurt realized where this was going and a whisk of panic gave him the strength to push him away, but not far enough.

Cooper's hand remained where it was and the other one joined in soon, Kurt felt the chill of air against his back as Cooper tried to reveal as much skin as he could.

"Cooper," Kurt said to his lips and Cooper quickly let his lips trail down to his neck. It was getting warmer, not even Kurt could deny that - with Cooper's body pressed closely to his. "Cooper, stop -"

The hands were gone immediately, as well as the lips and Cooper had stepped back so quickly he looked as if he was dizzy.

"'M sorry." Cooper mumbled, hiding his face in his hands. "M'sorry."

"What is wrong with you?" Kurt snapped, but Cooper kept on shaking his head and didn't seem to hear him. For a minute Kurt let his heart slow down, breathing in steady to control himself.

"Kurt?" Cooper said softly and he looked up, finding Cooper staring at him intensely and with a hint of guilt. Kurt let his head fall back in his neck, holding back tears he didn't even notice welling.

"It's fine." he finally said. "You're just - let's, why don't we -" many words were coming up in head to sooth the entire situation, but they didn't take away the mess that was created - nothing was fine, "Why were you out drinking?" he suddenly asked. "On a Wednesday night?"

Cooper started to roll on the ball of his foot, looking up - down, every direction until he ended up staring straight into Kurt's eyes and he admitted: "I was celebrating." He said it almost sarcastic - as if it was not really celebrating at all.

"Celebrating what?" Kurt's voice went shrill yet demanding and Cooper wasn't answering, but that's because Kurt knew very well what and why - there was no denying it anymore. "You got the part." he stated and Cooper nodded. "When did you hear?"

"This morning."

Kurt swallowed. "When did you know?"

"Kurt, I just told you - this morn-"

"No, Cooper -" Kurt yelled,  "that was when you heard, I am asking when you knew." Cooper stared at him helplessly. "You've known for a long time now, haven't you?" He forced his voice to go softer - yelling would get him nowhere. "Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you just tell me you got through your audition? Why did you keep it hidden, we could have been celebrating together-"

"Really?" Cooper huffed. "You'd really think you would have responded like that?"

"You asked me to be happy for you, remember? Well it would have been a lot more easier to try if you told me!"

"Because that's all you were doing, Kurt! Trying!" Cooper started to yell as well. "I'm constantly happy for you and I want you to be happy for me too!"

"But keeping things from each other doesn't do well, does it?"

"I was scared, Kurt - every time I wanted to bring it up, you seem to have found something in New York that made you happy - either a new show, your classes -" he spat.

"New York is my dream, Cooper - I can't just," Kurt pulled his hair, breathing hard. "I can't just give that up."

"No, you think New York is your dream - because it has everything you want at this moment!"

"You can't tell me what I'm thinking, Cooper!"

"It has your school, it has your best friend - even next year you'll have Blaine here and you have me."

"And you're all I need?" Kurt scowled.

"You're all I need, damn it Kurt! I need you!" Cooper kicked the coffee table with force, but he didn't seem in pain. "I thought New York was everything when I got here; the theatres, the clubs - I thought I could get it all and when I met you I was certain I had found my perfect life and future, but I needed more, Kurt - I don't want to be a failure without work, I need this movie -"

"Then why didn't you just tell me?"

"I've been trying! You have no idea - do you know how long I've been without any work? No parts at all? Almost nine months, Kurt, and the part I had back then was for two weeks before the entire production just flopped because the stupid audience refused to come -"

"But why L.A.? Why all the way to other side of the country? There are plenty of ways to work here in New York and on Broadway-"

"Broadway is dead! IT'S DEAD!" Cooper shouted loudly and Kurt stepped backwards in fear. "There is nothing here that's keeping me except for you and you are delirious with everything what they tell at that stupid school. That four out of five graduates get a job after they graduate - well they don't. It's all a scam and you're not seeing it because you think it's your dream - if you can make it here, you can make it anywhere - right? Well I didn't - college was a waste of time -" Cooper's voice faltered when he realized Kurt wasn't even trying to interrupt him. Instead Kurt was trying to hold his breath steady as his chest was heaving more than usual and the rest of his body seemed completely tensed.

"So -" he spoke when the silence had taken up every inch of the apartment. The apartment they shared their first kiss, where they had many laughs and dates - where Kurt let himself believe he deserved a boyfriend like Cooper. But everything seemed a vague memory, made up late at night right before going to sleep. He took another breath before continuing: "So you think my dream is worthless?"

"I didn't say that -" Cooper quickly said, realizing he had blurted out things he didn't want to share.

"But you think I'm wasting my time? With Tisch -" Kurt started to adjust his clothes, walking around to create space and stopped when there was a couch separating them. "That it's stupid to think I might be in the four of five graduates - that I'm delirious to even consider getting a job on Broadway because, and I quote, it's dead -" He massaged his temples before throwing his hands up. "I just be out of my god damned mind!"

"Kurt, I didn't mean to say that, please -" Cooper begged.

"To even consider I could have it all,"

"Please, don't - please don't -"

"I didn't get the school of my dreams, but Tisch was finally becoming my home. I lost my best friend from High School to said school, but I finally realized I didn't need her because I had great new friends who understood me - and on top of this lovely rebuilt dream was the perfect, handsome boyfriend who now thinks my dreams are silly -"

Cooper was staring at him speechless.

"You think I'm delirious? Blinded by my dream? I've lost dreams, Cooper - just like you. But I refuse to give up again just because of you. Just because you're failing here doesn't mean I will." Kurt shook his head, turning around to find the door - he needed to get out of there.

"Kurt," Cooper's voice had grown immensely small and fragile, "I didn't mean to -"

"But you did, Cooper." Kurt let his shoulders slump. "But you did mean it." He set his first steps toward the door and turned around one last time. "Good luck. In L.A. I hope -" he felt the tears rolling down his cheeks. "- your new dreams are worth it."

"Kurt?" Cooper's eyes were wide in shock and his entire body seemed to be getting ready to run.

"Goodbye, Cooper."

And he walked out the door, ignoring Cooper's pleads and shouts and stepped into the elevator. It started to close just as Cooper ran in the hallway, searching which way Kurt went and the last thing he saw before the solid silver door blocked his vision, was Cooper trying to race toward him - his name still echoing in the building and a loud bang on the now fully shut door, probably Cooper slamming it.

Kurt didn't take his usual way home but hailed a taxi - thank God that the city never sleeps and taxi's still drove at one.

Just as he scooted in the backseat he realized it was the first time he had ever said goodbye to Cooper. And that he'd actually meant it.

"Do you think I made a mistake?" Kurt asked quietly.

Nancy was sitting on her bed and appeared from behind her book with a pitiful look. A look Kurt had quickly became to detest - as it seemed to be on everyone's face as soon as the news spread. Kurt no longer had a boyfriend. He had dumped the handsome, unreachable man from their introduction week. Of course nobody knew exactly how it happened apart from Nancy, but everybody seemed to shun Kurt and it was affecting his confidence.

"Kurt -" Nancy said.

"Am I being selfish?"

"I think both of you are being a bit selfish." she answered truthfully, something Kurt could appreciate. He nodded and returned staring at his own textbook - but the words refused to be taken in.

He had never experienced this. Before he had been rejected by boys he would never have anyway, but he never truly had someone to call his and he had never had to lose them.

Never had he also expected to be the one doing the dumping. He had tried to convince himself they were both at fault: Cooper was leaving and Kurt couldn't come with him. But Cooper had wanted him to come - he had been out there trying to find a resolution for them both, but Kurt had said no.

So who really needed to take the blame?

What he currently absolutely hated was that he couldn't open his phone anymore without being confronted with texts and missed calls. Blaine had told him to call him, but every time he opened his phone this dark pit of emptiness came over him upon seeing the constant memory that Cooper wanted to talk.

Today also turned out to be the worst day to end a relationship, because if he hadn't hated Valentine's Day before - he did now.

In the morning Nancy had raced to his room to get some clothes. After all it was a normal school day and if teachers noticed his absence, it could affect his chances of getting the role of Dorian. Or at least that's what Nancy had said and she was the one to force him to get through it.

All of a sudden his entire college looked like McKinley.

No longer random flirty texts.

No longer the thought of watching a movie with his boyfriend, snuggled up on the couch and more kissing than actually watching.

People were staring at him again in the hallways. He had no idea how the news had spread - he hadn't even changed his Facebook status yet. It was at the end of the day he realized it was himself that told the world he was no longer in a relationship.

He had dragged himself - well, Nancy had dragged him - through the morning while ignoring everything pink and heart-shaped. His phone was still sturdily switched off and every corner he passed, he feared to run into Cooper.

Lunch break turned out the be the worst moment of the day. He usually sat alone with Nancy, gossiping and happily chatting - but today he was playing around with his food, wondering if he could skip the last few classes.

"But it's Ensemble Singing!" Nancy tried to convince him. "It's one of your favorites, come on."

He pursed his lips. Ensemble Singing was indeed one of his favorite courses - mostly because they were usually fooling around and it reminded him of the glory days of glee club. Pity the teacher didn't approve of impromptu performances.

"I wish I was still in glee club." he said out of nowhere and Nancy stared at him questioning. He shrugged, waving his fingers around to find the words. "That way I could sing about my feelings."

"Oh, Kurt." And the pitiful look was born.

"All these years of glee club and all those couples singing about their failed relationships and I usually sat in the corner rolling my eyes at the display, but -" Kurt sighed, "it's making more and more sense -"

"Happy Valentine's Day!" a overly happy voice squealed and two disgusted faces looked up to find Chandler, completely dressed in pink and red.

"What are you - Cupid?" Nancy asked revolted.

"Maybe I am," Chandler said giddily, ignoring her reaction, "and this Cupid has a delivery!" He turned his shoulder-bag to the front and retrieved a small red package, placing it directly in front of Kurt. "A small hint, it's not from your boyfriend!"

Something snapped in Kurt.

"Oh my God, Chandler!" Nancy yelled while Kurt was standing up. He heard her say something along the lines of ‘insensitive' and ‘stupid', but he had already walked away - head high. Without noticing Kurt had turned back into the Ice-Queen he was during his Junior year at McKinley. The year the bullying was the worse and acting on your emotions would get you nowhere. Nobody was there to help him, so he let his feeling clutter up - only to come out late at night. Small things would trigger his coldness, but also small things would break it and he needed someone to talk to.

He entered one of the more quiet hallways and grabbed his phone without thinking.

INBOX (43) flashed in the middle of the screen and Kurt hadn't meant to click it, but his thumb accidently swiped it.

To: Kurt               From: Cooper   (12:01 PM)
Please, don't let it end like this

To: Kurt               From: Cooper   (11:45 AM)
Are you at school? Kurt, please come over tonight

To: Kurt               From: Cooper   (11:28 AM)
I'm sorry, I really am

Kurt closed his eyes before he could read anymore of them. Cooper had practically texted him every fifteen minutes and seemed stubborn as hell.

Blindly he tried to close the text-messages, but when he opened he had only scrolled down and a message from a different number caught his eye.

To: Kurt               From: Blaine     (09:03 AM)
I'm here for you

The four little words made Kurt's frozen façade crack and he quickly hid his face in his hands. Never in his life had he felt this torn or could imagine Blaine's divided feelings, but without another look to all the messages, Kurt tapped Blaine's name - hoping he had a lunch break as well.

"Kurt!" Blaine said instead of normally picking up. "I've been worried sick, all I got was your voicemail and -"

"Sorry, I had my phone switched off."

Blaine was silent for a moment and hearing Kurt had changed something in him, because he continued way softer. "Of course, I should be sorry."

"Don't be silly. You didn't ask for your brother's e-ex-boyfriend to call you when -"

"Kurt, I thought we had established that you're more than just my brother's boyfriend."

He remained silence, thanking whatever needed to be thanked to have Blaine in his life.

"Is it stupid of me to ask how you are?"

"I guess it's the most logical question, but I don't even think I can come up with an answer."

"Can I ask why you called me then?"

Because you asked me to. Because I wanted to. Because I wished you were here.

"Can I - can I ask you something?" he said instead.

"Of course." Blaine replied with a reassuring voice.

"Imagine, hypothetically - that you were in a relationship." He entered a pause to give Blaine opportunity to interrupt, but he waited patiently. "And everything is going great, but - but your partner has dreams and you have dreams. And only one dream can come true if you remain together. What - what would you do?"

"Kurt -"

"All hypothetically."

"I know, I know, but I've never really been in a relationship with anybody, let alone someone with dreams."

"Surely you have imagination?" Kurt couldn't help but to sound a bit teasing. "What if he told you to give up Juilliard?"

"Kurt! Did my brother -" Blaine suddenly sounded fuming, "did he ask you to give up Tisch?"

"He kind of told me Broadway was dead -" He heard Blaine scoff. "But, please - tell me, what would've you done?"

"I - I'm not picking sides, Kurt."

"I'm not asking you to, I'm asking what you would have done in my position -" He was pushing it, and he knew that very well, but he just needed to know.

"I would've depend on the other person." Blaine finally said quietly. "I think - I think there's a person I would give it up for."

Kurt slowly sank down the wall, bending his knees until he was completely seated on the dirty floor of the hall. This answer he had feared - he feared he was the only one who would put up his teenage dream higher than any person.

"Kurt? Kurt, I'm not telling you this is what everyone should do - but if the choice was given to me and the other person was the person I have in mind and there was an absolute guaranty he would love me back - then he would be my dream."

Kurt let out a shaky laugh. "That's one lucky person."

"He has no idea." Blaine then coughed loudly, as if he slipped something he didn't mean to say and quickly recovered. "But know I don't give up easily on anything."

"I understand. It's just, I feel like I've given up so many things because they were taken away from me and I'm doubting I just let them go - like I let them be taken away and I couldn't with this one. With Broadway. New York. I couldn't let go, not again."

"Real dreams don't let them be taken away that easily, Kurt. You fight for them and when a dream isn't worth fighting for - then maybe... it's not a real dream." Blaine whispered. "I'm going to stop talking now, I'm really sorry. I'm kind of torn."

"No, no, that's not what I want. I am such a nitwit, how could I put you into this?"

"Because I told you I was there for you and you could call me. Try to relax, okay?"

"I don't want to hang up yet." Kurt confessed, feeling the conversation coming to an end.

"Well, I have class in like - five minutes."

"Me too."

"And Mr. Schuester is having us sing lovesongs, well - Sugar is making us sing them in return of the payment for the Regionals costumes."

"That sounds like her."

A bell rang through the phone. "Shit," Blaine said, "I need to go, but will you promise me one thing?" Kurt awaited the request. "Don't pile up your emotions, okay? Talk, scream - sing."

"Okay."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

"Text me your e-mail, saves us a dreadful phonebill. And Kurt? I'm sorry I can't be there in person -"

"I couldn't ask that of you -"

"But I wish I was." he said before Kurt could continue. "I really do." And he hung up.

Kurt turned off his phone quickly before he could see any more messages. He hated the fact that the conversation made him more confused than solved.

Blaine would've given up his dream for a person, but he wasn't Blaine.

Dreams that aren't worth fighting for weren't real dreams, but having a loving boyfriend was a real dream.

Was it all about priorities? Were his priorities wrong?

With a lump in his throat he resumed his day, ending it by asking Nancy whether he made a mistake or not and Nancy couldn't answer it. In need of some alone time, he decided to go back to his own room and waved away Nancy's protests.

He was feeling radical and daring - he wanted Cooper to show up. His entire mind was a big pool of contradiction and he had no idea which idea to feed, so he let faith decide. And faith decided he needed alone time, as Cooper wasn't there.

For a moment he hesitated on going inside, looking down the hallway one more time before sighing deeply and turning his key.

Little things could trigger his coldness and little things could make it crack - and his room made the ice crack and freeze at the same time. There were pictures on the wall, a forgotten vest on the chair - everything indicating that he hadn't been prepared for or even expecting a break up.

He forced himself down on the bed, facing the wall of memories. It was like he was drawn to it and unable to look away.

His breath fastened as he held back tears - but why? He was alone now. He could all let it go if he wanted to.

But he didn't want to. He was holding on the last threads, to the cracks of his foundation - and worst of all he was breaking his promise to Blaine, because the piling up had already started before he had spoken to him.

---

Without noticing time slipped into Friday and Kurt had spent his night not moving a muscle. He could barely remember if he had slept in this position or not at all. There was no ache, no stiff neck - he felt nothing.

A small quirk in his lips appeared when he remembered he had no class on Friday, but also that feeling quickly dissolved into nothing. At least he didn't have to worry about running into someone who would unsubtly ask him what happened between him and Cooper.

Today he was going to do absolutely nothing.

He blinked once and changed his focus from the floor to the wall again. If it really was the end of his relationship he should be taking down things, but he was pretty sure he wasn't able to do so. Or even wanted to do it.

He should also call his dad to tell him the ‘news', but he was afraid how he would respond. Would he happy? Or worse - would he say ‘I told you so'? No, his dad wouldn't. He would sigh and give him opportunity to just spill - spill it all.

But Kurt felt no urge to talk. The only idea that was appealing was staying his room, in this very same position and just do nothing. Yeah, doing nothing seemed good.

A small knock on the door tore him away from those thoughts. Don't respond, he thought, don't respond and they'll go away.

"Kurt?" the voice of Nancy said muffled through the door. "Are you there?"

No. Nobody's here. Nothing is here.

But Nancy wasn't someone who gave up that easily and she simply turned the door open as Kurt apparently forgot to lock it. She was standing in the doorway, a white box clenched under her arm and that stupid, awful pitiful look on her face.

"Did you sleep at all?" she asked and Kurt couldn't answer. "Oh, sweetie."

He simply stared at her with a hollow look, suddenly focusing on the box and asked what it was.

"This?" She held up the thing and Kurt nodded. "It's an X-box."

Kurt eyed it incredulously; that didn't look like the gamestation Finn always cursed at. It looked like a normal storage box, straight from IKEA.

"E-X-box." Nancy clarified. ‘We're gonna make this quick and I'll be your wingman."

"I don't understand."

"Oh honey, I know this is your first break-up ever and well, I'm kind of an expert, I'm going to help you get out of this hell hole that reminds you of him." She placed the box on his desk and looked around the room. "Did you got rid of anything yet?"

He shook his head. He had barely moved since he got here.

"Had any kind of horrible, but heavenly calories?" Once again he shook his head. "Sang a sad song? Did you do anything at all?"

He remained quiet and Nancy muttered something underneath her breath.

"You stay there, I'll handle this." she said and swiftly moved to the wall of frames. Kurt gasped when she took one picture down. "You know, Kurt - there are different archetypes of break-ups." The picture was released from the frame and a smiling Cooper and Kurt disappeared in the ex-box. "There's the sobby, cry every five seconds -loud - kind." Another frame from the wall. "The ‘let it all out in one time and move on' kind, I used to be one of those until dickhead." She sounded bitter and continued with various kinds like ‘hoarders', whom pretended everything was just fine and Kurt thought he belonged in that one, the ‘quickly moved on' kind - and he feared Cooper was one of those, the ‘runaways' - the kind that simply packed everything and left as fast as possible, trying to get over it by moving far away.

"And then is one of the worst kinds - you."

Five frames were returned back on the wall empty and Kurt stared at her in shock.

"What kind?"

Nancy put down the frame she was working with, walked to the bed and sat next to him.

"Sort of a hoarder, but worse. You're refusing to let go, Kurt." she said. "And it's even worse because you're the one that broke up the entire thing. Most people who get out of a relationship either celebrate or tear apart things. You on the other hand, you're questioning your decisions." She shook him a bit. "And it's horrible to witness."

"It's only been two days -" he started but Nancy silenced him.

"The longer you put out the getting over part, the more you doubt. You're a doubter, Kurt."

He answered with silence and Nancy returned to her task while shaking her head. Quietly he waited until she was completely sucked into her job, eyeing his nightstand with a pounding heart in his chest. Nancy started to hum a song and Kurt took his only chance, urging forward to the cabin and searched in the drawer. When his hands slipped around the object, he quickly hid it in his palm and jumped back into his old position, leaving no trace.

Without looking too suspicious, he stowed it away underneath his blanket, completely invisible for Nancy to find. His heart remained pounding as Nancy went through his wardrobe - taking out a few shirts that looked like they were Cooper's and dumped them in the box.

Within an hour, Kurt's room felt as empty as his mind.

"We'll need to take some new pictures to put in the frames." Nancy noticed. She took out the label of the box and handed it to Kurt together with a pen. "Now write ‘here lie the memories of Cooper'." He stared at her as if she was crazy. "Or just Cooper."

With a shaky hand he wrote down his now official ex-boyfriend's name. "What are you going to do with the box now?"

"I'm going to storage it in my room where you will never find it and when we have our own apartment -" A smile broke her face - they really couldn't wait until they had their own place. "We will design a morgue with the inscription ‘Hall of Exes - the men who weren't good enough'. Or something like that."

He knew she was trying to cheer him up and it was helping - a little.

"Well, this was step one of ‘How to deal with a break up for doubters', next step is to remind yourself of things you love." Nancy said. "But we'll leave that for another day." she added softer. He understood why; this was already a lot to take in and he was sure he would feign everything.

"I'll see you at dinner."

She leaned forward and pressed a kiss on his forehead. Right before she left with the box under her arm, Kurt called her back. With raised eyebrows she stared at him, waiting for him to say anything.

"Thank you." he whispered.

A small smile appeared. "Anything for my favorite gay sugar daddy."

With a skip she walked out of the room and Kurt waited for approximately five minutes before he was sure she wasn't coming back. The pounding heart returned as he lifted his blankets, reaching out to retrieve his hidden goods and a single tear ran down his cheek while opening his hands, revealing his most beloved treasure - the blackbird pin he got for Christmas.

It was Friday afternoon and Blaine was rearranging his room by putting his keyboard in the middle of it. It was highly necessary as it needed to be completely in the frame of his camera, otherwise it was just plain weird. He and Nancy had changed numbers and he had received several texts with updates from her - and according to the girl, Kurt was having a hard time dealing with it.

He wasn't even sure if this was a smart idea, but Kurt's heart was broken and considering Blaine had already lost his heart to Kurt - he would give his own to mend his.

He checked if the power was working and a few random notes filled his room.

"Perfect." he muttered, perking up at the sudden sound a door downstairs opening. Nobody was supposed to come home until six. "Mom?" he yelled, but there was no response.

It couldn't possibly be his father and with curiosity creeping up his body, he walked out of his room and went downstairs. Halfway the stairs he noticed the front-door being wide-open and a few bags and boxes were stacked right next to the entrance. He was just thinking how odd that was when a silhouette appeared in the doorway, throwing some more boxes on the others and Blaine let out a shocked noise.

"Cooper!" he shouted and his brother backed out at the sudden presence. He searched up to the source, looking at Blaine with a tiny bit of shock before his face melted into one of his usual fake smiles.

"Hey, Blainey!"

"Cooper! What the hell are you doing here?" Blaine stormed down the stairs and Cooper shrugged innocently.

"Just dumping some stuff I can't take to L.A. or keep in New York."

"L.A. - what? Did you -?" He walked to door and saw Cooper's car. "Did you drive here? Why aren't you in New York?"

Cooper stared at him as if he was an idiot. "I'm moving to L.A., you know that."

"Yes, but - I thought later and, what the hell?"

"Well, no time like the present - do you still want to come during Spring Break? I can give mom a smolder so she'll pay your ticket. It'll be fun!" He continued piling up things to carry to his room upstairs. "A little help?"

Blaine stared at him with mouth open in shock.

"Suit yourself." Cooper rolled his eyes and started to head up the stairs. Blaine followed him without carrying anything, still confused and shocked. "Get the door please." he said and Blaine opened it without a question. He blocked the entrance as soon as his brother was inside the room.

"Care to explain?" he demanded.

"Nope."

"Cooper." he tilted his head in despair. "What about Kurt?"

"Kurt is refusing to talk to me and considering you and him are ‘buddies'," Cooper did a vague shimmy to ridicule it, "I bet you already know why -" He shoved Blaine out of the way to get more of his things, but Blaine didn't let go that easily.

"So you just left? Kurt doesn't want to talk to you for a day and you jump into your car and drive to Ohio?!"

"Seems like it." Cooper muttered. "Take this." And forced a bag into Blaine's hands. "If you're interrogating me on behalf of Kurt, you might as well do something for me."

"What? What are you even saying -"

Cooper turned around and his eyes were practically spitting fire. "Then tell me, look me straight in the eye and tell me Kurt hasn't contacted you in the past days." Blaine didn't answer. "That's what I thought." He turned back around with Blaine right on his heels.

"At least he's talking to someone, I texted you too! I was worried sick. I had to hear from my brother's ex-boyfriend -"

"Don't say that word."

"- that they broke up. You would think I would hear it sooner from you, Cooper Anderson!"

"Why bother when I already knew Kurt would steal you. You two seem practically inseparable."

"I told him I was not picking sides. I am not." Blaine was shouting now and closed the door of his brother's room, locking them both in. "Don't you dare." he threatened when he saw his brother calculate how to escape.

It took a full minute before Cooper hands went up to his hair, knotting his fingers between the locks and his eyes were suddenly red rimmed.

Blaine felt his body-language soften almost immediately. He had only seen his brother cry twice. The first time was during his coming out, before he even knew that Cooper was gay as well and he had choked out the confession. The second time was when he woke up in the hospital, band-aids and gauze partially covering his body. Cooper had said all these things that it was his fault and he would come back to Ohio, but Blaine had kicked him back to New York.

And now for the third time Cooper had sunk down onto his bed, hiding his face in his hands again just as he had in New York in January, crying.

"You're running away, aren't you?" Blaine asked. It was obvious as his brother had ran before - away from his troubles: their parents, Ohio - his closeted secret.

"It's easier." Cooper spilled. "Just knowing he's - he's there, somewhere - continuing his life. It hurts so much." Blaine carefully sat down next to him. "He's not responding, Nancy isn't responding. They're completely locking me out and I want to explain so bad. But they're not letting me and I was just going crazy. Before I realized it I was in my car." He was fully sobbing into the crook Blaine's neck now. "I feel like such a failure." he muttered.

"You're not a failure." Blaine comforted. "I think you and Kurt just need some space now. And you got the part!"

"I know." Cooper said a bit relaxed. "But it feels like such a consolation prize."

"But - this is what you've wanted. What you've always wanted."

His brother let go of him, sinking his head into his hands again. "Then why do I feel so empty?"

Blaine stroked his back, feeling the vibrations shake through Cooper's body.

"If it makes you better, I'll come to L.A. with Spring Break." he soothed. "If you'd like."

Cooper peeked sideways to the boy that was trying his best to make him feel better.

"I'd like that."

"It's settled then." Blaine said, realizing he had to postpone his little plan to cheer Kurt up and help his brother first.