I see you driving 'round town
With the guy I love and I'm like,
Forget you!

Kurt didn't think he'd ever hated spending the night at his house as much as he did now. Knowing that while he was sulking in front of the tv, behind his laptop or even doing some homework, Rachel was currently on a date with Blaine (his Blaine! – although not really, of course) wasn't doing his mood any good.

How dare she just ask him out like that, knowing fully well how Kurt felt about him. What a friend she turned out to be. He should've seen it coming, though – they were so alike, they even fell for the same guys (though Rachel never seemed to be fazed by Sam, and Kurt had never seen the appeal of the bigheadedness of one Jesse St James). First Finn, now Blaine… and of course, both boys chose Rachel over Kurt. He should've seen that coming too. After all, it was much easier for a guy to date a girl than another guy.

It was moments like these that Kurt seriously considered Rachel's words when she'd told him that the two of them were actually very alike earlier that school year. If that was so true, then why would Blaine want to go out with Rachel, and not with him? The largest difference between the two of them was, of course, their gender – so did this really mean that Blaine could be bi?

And why did it have to be Rachel? The girl who took everything from him anyway, the girl who got everything he wanted as well, the girl who was everything he was except in female form?

They really were alike. A little too much for Kurt's taste, actually.

Only Kurt liked to think that, had the roles been reversed and he had made out with Rachel's potential boyfriend, who then didn't seem to mind turning gay, or bi, or whatever for him – he wouldn't have asked him out as boldly and readily as Rachel had asked out Blaine. He would have respected – or something like that – the fact that Rachel was really, really in love with the guy and backed off.

(Finn totally didn't count there – at first, he had a girlfriend anyway, and then he turned out to be very, very straight, and also rather homophobic, at that. Somewhere deep inside, Kurt had known all along that he didn't stand a chance, and Finn was far from the only guy who could potentially reciprocate any feelings Rachel might've had for him, while Blaine was the only other out gay guy Kurt knew.)

Still, it was an awful thought that, since he and Rachel were so alike, he could've had a chance with Blaine – had he been a girl.

These thoughts kept bugging him the entire evening, and he hated it. If Blaine wanted to date Rachel, then fine. But as far as Kurt was concerned, he wasn't going to wait around. He wasn't going to either wait to pick up the pieces if one of them had enough of the other, and he most certainly wasn't going to be a consolation prize either.

If he could, he would banish all thoughts of the two of them out of his head – he would forget all about them and live happily ever after… or something. He was well aware that this was impossible.

He knew that before long, Blaine would start texting or calling him again, or cornering him in the hallways, wanting to talk about it. He knew that Rachel would pretty much do the same thing, only she might actually stop by his house (never mind that Finn lived there too).

For now, he tried to pretend that they – two of his best friends – didn't exist and he didn't mind at all. He tried to pretend that they weren't out on a date, possibly holding hands (or worse). He tried to forget all about the sickening feeling in his stomach, and he tried to forget about what was happening outside of the house.

(The next morning, he was sure that he didn't forget, because he'd been dreaming about the… date all night. All kinds of possible scenarios had passed by, so there was really only one way to solve his uncertainty – find Rachel and interrogate her. He'd forget her later (though he doubted Rachel would ever let him forget her, because how could he forget about someone as fantastic and special and talented as her?), but now he needed answers.

When he was finally ready to forget, she suddenly showed up at his doorstep one evening, declaring that tomorrow would be the day she was going to kiss Blaine while sober. After that day, he vowed, there would be no doubt whether he should forget about them or not, so he actually went along with her crazy plan.

And when he was simply forcing himself not to think about Rachel anymore (Blaine and he had talked it over, but Rachel had never apologised or anything, as if her behaviour was normal), she turned out to have written a song for Regionals that described his McKinley experiences in a frighteningly accurate way, and he figured that maybe, it wasn't so bad that he hadn't really forgotten about her.)

For now, there was no world outside his house, there was nothing in the world except for him and his DVD collection, and there were no feelings that could possibly get hurt really badly tonight, or a little later. Though he knew that he could never forget those two in the long run, tonight, he would at least try.