Walking back to Blaine's apartment that night after dinner was slow going.  It was almost three weeks since the surgery, and Blaine had switched to using a cane as of a few days ago.  Kurt really didn't think he was steady enough for it, but Blaine complained like crazy about how the crutches made his underarms sore, and he clearly wasn't going to use the wheelchair, so Kurt figured he'd just be patient and stick as close to him as he could.

Kurt could tell Blaine was getting tired and struggling to keep his balance.  They were just a block from his apartment, starting to cross the street, when a bike messenger coming around the corner came too close and sideswiped Blaine, knocking him into the road.  A cab followed behind the bike, and Kurt felt the world close in around him as it braked, trying to avoid Blaine.  He couldn't see what was happening over the parked car in front of him, but he heard screaming and a car horn.  “Blaine!” 

Kurt dashed out around the car and saw Blaine sitting in the street with his head in his hands, the side of the cab seemingly inches away from his head.  Kurt crashed to his knees in the road, his arms flying around Blaine and pulling him close.  He's not dead he's not dead he's not dead ran in a loop through his brain, as he babbled uncontrollably, “oh my god, Blaine, are you okay, are you okay, Blaine, say something, are you okay?” 

The cab driver was talking to them, but Kurt couldn't pay him any attention, he couldn't think of anything but what had just happened.  He had been sure the cab was going to hit Blaine.  There was no way he could have avoided him.  He loosened his hold on Blaine to look at his face, Blaine's eyes wide and panicked but there, open, looking back at him.  “Where are you hurt?”  Kurt ran his hands over his shoulders and down his arms, over his legs where one knee was scraped and bleeding.  A teenage girl was saying something to him, holding Blaine's cane and one of his boat shoes.  He looked blankly at her and she put them down and backed away.  Kurt put a hand to Blaine's cheek and Blaine leaned into it, his eyes fluttering and his chest heaving.  Kurt pulled Blaine's head to his shoulder and scrabbled his hands in his hair, shaking, feeling Blaine pant hot against his neck. 

Finally Blaine took a labored breath and spoke.  “Kurt.  I'm, I'm okay.”  Blaine picked up his shoe and put it on, then grasped the cane.  “I want to go home.”  Kurt scrambled to his feet and leaned down to loop his arms under Blaine's and pull him up.  Blaine grunted and squeezed his eyes shut but got his feet under him and stood, leaning heavily against Kurt.  His polo was wet on the back and down his side, and a piece of Kurt's brain that apparently never shut off wondered if the oil from the street was going to ruin the shirt.  At least it's not blood, another part of his brain helpfully contributed.  A tall woman who had been riding in the cab was saying something about an ambulance and insurance and lawyers and was shoving a card in Blaine's face but he just turned to Kurt and said again, “I want to go home,” so Kurt pulled Blaine's arm over his shoulder, planted his arm around his waist, and together they weaved their way through the growing crowd of people in the street, up on to the sidewalk, and continued their path towards Blaine's apartment.  Blaine was trembling and shivering but he kept walking so Kurt kept going too, ignoring the people pushing past them and shooting them dirty looks for walking so slowly. 

Kurt's heart was still pounding when they reached Blaine's building, and he pulled Blaine against him in the elevator, clenching his hand in his hair.  He could hear their breathing loud in the small space, neither one of them apparently able to do anything but stand there.  They stumbled in through the apartment door and before he knew it Sam had Blaine's other arm and was helping them inside.  “I fell, Sam,” Blaine said in a pinched voice, looking up at Sam as he and Kurt lowered him on to the couch.   

“I can tell,” Sam said, sitting down next to him and wrapping his arms loosely around Blaine.  “But you got back up, right?  You got back up.  You're okay.”  Sam rubbed Blaine's back comfortingly.  “You clearly weren't watching where you were going, B.  You have got to be more careful.”

Blaine choked out something that resembled a laugh, and dug his forehead into Sam's shoulder.  Kurt was still standing by the couch, frozen, trying to remember what he was supposed to be doing. 

Sam turned and looked at Kurt, touching him on the arm gently.  “Kurt?  You okay?”

“There was a car.  It almost hit him.”

Sam's face paled.  “Shit.”  He swallowed hard and continued rubbing Blaine's back.  “Um, why don't you get the first aid kit?  It should be under the sink in the bathroom.”  He looked at Blaine's knee, where the blood was starting to dry.  “Maybe a towel and some water, too?”

Kurt made his way to the bathroom, but didn't look under the sink.  Instead he found himself sitting on the closed toilet, trying to catch his breath.  He felt like he was about to pass out, and he lowered his head between his knees, willing his heart to slow down.  Blaine was fine, he just got knocked down, he was fine.  No one was hurt, no one was killed.  He kept feeling Blaine being drawn away from him, seeing him go spinning out into the street. Kurt tried to concentrate on his breathing, forcing himself to relax, feeling the air go in and out, in and out.  After a while it felt less like he was spinning, and he sat up slowly, his vision clearer now.  Kurt found a glass and poured himself some water, drinking it down carefully.  He looked into the mirror at his blank expression, still feeling stunned.  He splashed some water on his face, ran a comb through his hair, and took a deep breath.  He could do this.  He wasn't going to shut down just because he got scared.  Blaine got back up, and he could too.

When he came out into the living room with the first aid kit, Blaine's dirty shirt was off and Sam was wrapping a fleece blanket around him, making him laugh with an impression that seemed to have something to do with mummies, or maybe vampires.  It didn't sound at all familiar to Kurt, but he didn't really care, as long as it was making Blaine smile.

“Florence Nightingale has arrived,” he announced, hoping no one was going to ask him why it took so long for him to walk to the bathroom and back.  Kurt sat down on the ottoman and relaxed a little as Blaine smiled at him. 

“You're the best looking nurse I've ever seen,” Blaine said, reaching out to touch Kurt's face.  “Are you okay?”

“I nearly think I should be asking you that,” Kurt said, searching Blaine's eyes.

Sam looked at Kurt appraisingly, apparently trying to decide whether he had one patient or two.  “Go ahead and wipe up his leg before he gets blood everywhere,” he said lightly.  Blaine winced as Kurt started to clean off the scrape on his leg, and Sam put a steadying arm around him.  “It's okay, B., it's just a scrape.”

“It's not even very deep,” Kurt said, wiping Blaine's knee with some alcohol.  “It just bled a lot.  It's fine now, though.”  He gently spread some ointment over the cuts, and set a large bandaid over it.  “I must say, you guys have a very well stocked first aid kit.”

“Yeah, well, Blaine falls all the time, so we have to be prepared,” Sam said with a smile.  “Plus I have an unfortunate habit of cutting slices into my fingers.”

“What?”

“Sam likes to eat vegetables, but he's terrible at cutting them up,” Blaine explained, picking up Sam's left hand and showing a spot to Kurt.  “See?  He almost took off the side of this finger.” 

Kurt's brain really wasn't able to absorb this right now, so he just nodded and went back to setting the supplies back into the first aid box.  He really couldn't believe Blaine got away with just a scraped knee.  “Blaine?  Are you sure you aren't hurt anywhere else?”

Blaine's face grew more serious, and he glanced at Sam before answering.  “I left a message for my doctor, and I'll go over there in the morning.  In a cab.”   He glanced at Sam again – Kurt guessed there must have been some discussion on this point.  “But I didn't hit my head, and I fell on my left side, not my right.  I'm probably going to have some bruises on my hip, and maybe my elbow, but I think that's it.”  Blaine pushed the blanket off and showed Kurt his left arm, and Kurt peered at it, but didn't see even a scratch.

“You were really lucky,” he said quietly.

Blaine nodded solemnly back.  “Yeah, I was.”

Sam stood up, stretching.  Kurt realized he was in his sweats and tank top, and was probably half asleep when they burst in.  Sam gave Kurt a quick look, then leaned down and kissed Blaine on the head.  “I'm going to bed.  Good night, guys.  Let me know if you need anything, okay?”  He patted Kurt on the shoulder, then headed off towards his room. 

Blaine looked at Kurt and stretched out his hand.  “Sit with me?”

Kurt moved from the ottoman to the couch, sitting sideways to look at Blaine.  “Life is really scary,” he said, not really meaning to say it.

“It is,” Blaine agreed, pulling Kurt up against him.  The blanket fell off Blaine's shoulders and Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine's naked back, Kurt's face pressed into the sweaty skin of his neck.  Kurt  felt tears leaking out of his eyes, but he couldn't stop them, and he had lost track of why he should even try.  He was shaking, and he vaguely heard Blaine murmuring something that he imagined was supposed to be comforting.  Kurt felt Blaine untuck his shirt from his pants and weave his hands in between their bodies to undo the buttons. Kurt just stayed where he was, his head on Blaines shoulder, absently noticing his tears sliding over Blaines collarbone.  Blaine shifted him gently to pull the shirt off his arms, and pushed against his chest until Kurt was flat on his back on the couch, pulling his legs up so that he lay flat.  Blaine slowly lowered himself on top of Kurt, letting his full weight rest on his body, pressing Kurt down into the cushions, his bare skin warm and present against Kurts.  Reaching around, Blaine pulled the blanket on top of them, then framed Kurts face with his hands, a thumb brushing over his cheekbone.  Kurt closed his eyes, letting Blaine ground him, the touch and smell of his boyfriend surrounding him, holding him together.  Kurt didnt realize he had stopped crying until he noticed that Blaine was no longer wiping his face, but had relaxed against Kurt's shoulder, breathing softly against his neck, his arms wrapped around his head and his hands laced into his hair. 

After a while Kurt opened his eyes, and turned to look at Blaine, whose long lashes fluttered as he opened his own eyes in response and tried to focus on Kurt.  "Was that a panic attack?" Kurt asked, his voice sounding strange in his ears.

"I dont know," Blaine replied quietly, rubbing a hand over Kurts arm. 

"Maybe I should talk to Tessa about it?"  Kurt hadnt seen his therapist in a few weeks, but he was thinking that he should probably make sure not to miss their next session. 

Blaine nodded.  "Couldnt hurt."  He leaned up on an elbow, looking at Kurt carefully.  "Want to get into bed?"

"Yeah."  Kurt waited until Blaine eased himself off of him and onto the ottoman, then stood up and blinked fuzzily at him, waiting for his head to clear.  He took Blaines arm and they slowly walked back to his bedroom.  They made it to Blaines bed, and Kurt rummaged in his dresser for sleep pants for both of them, then went to get Blaine some ibuprofen. 

"Thanks," Blaine said, taking the pill dry; Kurt hadnt brought any water.  Probably would have been a good idea, he thought to himself, but Blaine didnt seem to mind. 

Blaine scooted under the blankets and looked up at Kurt, his eyes wide.  "Big spoon or little spoon?"  Blaine asked.  Kurt was still standing by the bed.  He saw the pill bottle in his hand, and set it down on the nightstand.  "Kurt?  Come here now, honey," Blaine said softly but firmly, holding up the edge of the blanket. Kurt slid in, moving close to Blaine until their noses were almost touching.  Blaine had a worried frown on his face, and reached out to run his hand down Kurts arm, wrapping his fingers around his wrist.  "Are you okay?"

"I feel weird," Kurt said.  Entirely accurate.

"What can I do?"  Kurt didnt know. He just wanted Blaine.

"Kiss me?"  Kurt asked tentatively.

Blaine quickly complied, placing a soft, sweet kiss on Kurts mouth, barely brushing his lips.  He did it again, then again, and finally something unwound inside Kurt and he could kiss Blaine back, his hand going up to grasp Blaines shoulder, his mouth opening against Blaines, his tongue tracing his lips.  It was slow, and tender, and exactly what Kurt needed. 

He shifted closer to Blaine, tangling their feet together, and reached around to Blaines back.  Kurt loved to rest his hand in that spot where Blaines back met his waist, just over the curve of his ass.  Blaine was a little sweaty under the blanket, but his warmth felt good.  Alive.

Blaine smiled at the touch, and reached up to thread his fingers through Kurts hair.  "How are you feeling now?"

"Honestly?"

"Well, yes," Blaine said, laughing a little.

"Part of me wants to give you the best orgasm youve ever had in your life, but the rest of me just wants to sleep.  For about a year."  Kurt could feel the heat rise in his face as he said this, but it was the truth.

Blaine laughed for real then, pulling Kurt tight against him and rocking him back and forth.  "Its been quite a night, hasnt it," Blaine said, pressing a hard kiss to Kurts tingling lips and then pulling back to look at him. 

"That it has," Kurt agreed.  "And to think that earlier I thought the big emotional drama of the evening was going to be you getting upset when Marley tried to get you to audition with her."  Kurt regretted his words as soon as they slipped out of his mouth, but Blaine wasnt bothered.

"Kind of puts things in perspective, doesnt it."

"Yeah."  Kurt was about to slide in close for another kiss, when he realized something was different.  "Hey.  Youve been lying on your leg this whole time."  Blaine almost never lay on his right side like this, it put too much pressure on his injured leg.

Blaine looked surprised too.  "I didnt notice.  I guess I wasnt thinking about it." 

Right, you were too busy worried about your boyfriend freaking out.  "How does it feel?"  Kurt asked.  Blaine shifted a little, then rolled back and forth on his leg like he had with Kurt a moment ago, making Kurt laugh.  "Don't do that.  If it didnt hurt before, it probably will now."

Blaine looked at him, his face open and happy.  "It hardly hurts at all."  He pressed a hand down his left side, wincing when he got to his hip.  "I think the bruise on my left side hurts more!"

"You realize youre not supposed to be happy about that," Kurt said, smiling at Blaines glee.  "But if youre really okay lying on your side, can I take you up on your offer?"

"What offer?"

"Big spoon."  Blaine beamed and nodded, holding still while Kurt climbed over him and curled up behind him.  Kurt wedged his right arm up under the pillow and put his left around Blaine.  Blaine took Kurt's hand and pulled it up against his chest as Blaine wiggled backwards, not stopping until he was firmly pressed up against Kurt, his round ass included.  "Mmm," Kurt said appreciatively.  "Youre going to make me regret my decision to go to sleep."

"What can I say, my ass loves you." 

"That's appropriate, I love it too."  Kurt hooked his chin over Blaines shoulder and leaned over for a kiss.  There was definitely an advantage to being taller than your little spoon.  "Would it be okay if I hoped that tomorrow is a little less dramatic than today was?"

"Fine with me.  Although you might lose your musical theater kid cred."

"What if I sang a song about it, would that help?"

"Depends on the song, I guess.  No Les Mis, its too sad."  Blaine giggled.  "I know one.”  He took a breath and made a face.  ”Sleep now little buddy, put your cares away.  Nappy with a happy face, tomorrows a latter day."

Kurt groaned at the silly Book of Mormon song, but picked up the refrain anyway.  "I am here for you."

"I am here for you, too," Blaine chimed in, and they finished together, "we are here for us."  Kurt peppered Blaines face with kisses as Blaine continued to giggle, and  then settled back down tight against Blaines back, breathless for the best of reasons.  He felt like he was about to overflow with emotion. 

"Go to sleep already, you goof," Kurt said softly.  "I love you like crazy, you know?"

"Love you too, baby.  Tomorrows a latter day."  Another giggle escaped from Blaine.

"Shhh.  Sleep."