Blaine shot straight up from the bed gasping for air with sweat dripping down the side of his face.  Not even a second later he felt Kurt's soft cool hand cover his own.

"Shhh, Blaine, babe, it's okay.  You were having another nightmare."  Kurt sat up against his headboard and pulled Blaine back between his legs so his head was resting on Kurt's shoulder.  Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine's waist resting his chin on Blaine's shoulder.  "Hey, sweetie, calm down."

Blaine began to take deep breathes and he relaxed back into Kurt.  Ever since the day in the park Blaine had frequently woken up to nightmares.  At first he would wake up screaming at the top of his lungs and Kurt would have to run down the couch to be with him.  After the first two nights of this Burt lifted the ban on Blaine sleeping in Kurt's room hoping it would help with the nightmares.  It did, to an extent.  He didn't scream anymore but for the last three nights he had jolted awake in a cold sweat.

After Blaine had completely calmed down Kurt began to relax too.

"Kurt, I don't want to go back to sleep."  Blaine grabbed Kurt's hand and began to trace the veins up his forearm.  He hesitated with his words now, "I'm... scared.  Whenever I close my eyes I start to feel like the walls are slowly closing in on me." 

Kurt listened to his boyfriend's words closely because Blaine had yet to open up about his nightmares.

"It's sort of unnoticeable at first.  But then the walls get closer and closer and everything begins to disappear and I can hear Riley's voice.  Although, she doesn't ever say anything, she is always screaming.  And I try to call out for her but the walls are getting so close now and there is no more air left in the room and then I wake up."

Kurt could feel Blaine tense in his arms so he grabbed his hand that was tracing shapes on his arm.

"I'll protect you.  I don't know how to make the nightmares go away, but I will always be here when you wake up.  And I will hold you and I will kiss you until you're not scared anymore."

"You promise?"

"I promise."

The boys fell asleep soon with Blaine still wrapped in Kurt's arms. 

Kurt and Blaine decided not to exchange gifts for Christmas.  Blaine got a guitar from Burt and Carole though and a journal from the Berry's (identical to the one they had gotten Riley for her birthday).  Blaine spent the next week in Kurt's room learning and playing the guitar while Kurt flipped through his fashion magazines.

"I'm going to write a song for you."  Blaine said with a huge grin on his face.

Blaine was getting better.  Kurt could tell that he still hurt all the time, which was something he knew wasn't' going to go away for a long time, but today Blaine was smiling which rarely happened.  Kurt took note of his as he looked up from his page.

"Is that so?"

"Ya.  And it's going to be horrible, just so you know."

"I disagree."

"You haven't ever heard it, silly."

"Well, I know that anything that comes from your heart is going to be amazing."

"Wow, someone had a side of cheese with their cereal this morning."  Blaine jokingly winked at Kurt before he got up to go join him on his bed.

Blaine laid down onto the pillows and Kurt flipped around so that their foreheads were pressed together.

"Are you excited for Rachel's party tonight?"  Kurt asked while wrapping his arms around Blaine's back.

"Riley always hated New Year's."  Kurt expected this to be Blaine's turning point back down to his usual quiet self but instead Blaine scooted his body a little closer to Kurt's.  "I believe her exact words were, ‘It's just a night for you to see that you've done nothing with your life and reflect upon all the times that you've messed up.'"  Blaine closed his eyes for a moment while he nudged Kurt's nose with his own.  "Despite everything that has happened this year I am actually looking forward to tonight though."

Kurt furrowed his eyebrows for a moment, "And why is that?"

"Because, it will be our first New Year's together."  Blaine opened his eyes now and looked deep into Kurt's, "It will be the first of hopefully many New Year's kisses that I get to share with you."

The next morning Blaine found himself and Kurt in practically the same position.  He had woken up with the same nightmare sometime late into the night and Kurt and helped him back to sleep.  Careful not to wake Kurt Blaine rolled over to look at the clock; it was about eight-thirty. 

Rolling back to facing Kurt Blaine took a few moments to just watch Kurt sleep.  He wondered what Kurt dreamt about at night.  Blaine hadn't really taken to time to think about how everything that was happening could have affected Kurt but now that Kurt lay unconscious in front of him he could see the physical changes that he had never seen before. 

Kurt had circles under his eyes, even while he was sleeping, and he was a bit thinner than usual.  Thinking back over the last week and a half Blaine could barely remember when Kurt had taken some time to himself.  He was always running around doing something for Blaine or getting something for Burt. 

Blaine leaned down and kissed Kurt's forehead and Kurt stirred before slowly opening his eyes.

"Hey, there."  Kurt's voice sounded tired.

"Hey, go back to sleep.  It's still pretty early."  That was a lie, Blaine usually got up at this time which meant Kurt usually did too but today Blaine wanted to let Kurt rest.

"No, I'm not very tired anymore."  Blaine knew how stubborn Kurt would be so he wasn't even going to try to argue.  "Besides, I want to play you something."

"Play me something?"

"Ya, on your guitar if you don't mind."

"I didn't know you played."

Kurt lay silently for a moment playing with the comforter on his bed and then slowly picking up Blaine's hand to play with that.

"My mom used to play for me when I was little and she even taught me a few things.  But after she died I didn't play anymore because I thought it would upset my dad."  Kurt sat up now so he mirrored Blaine on the bed.  "Freshman year I was walking by the band room at school and I saw a guitar sitting in there.  I spent every day during lunch in there relearning everything my mom had taught me and then teaching myself even more.  And then after everything happened with you and Riley I took the time that you were with her to learn a song for you."

A small smile set on Kurt's mouth and Blaine leaned over and kissed him gently.

"I would love to hear it."

Blaine watched as Kurt got off the bed and crossed the room to grab the guitar.  He quickly fixed his hair in the mirror before coming back over and sitting down on the bed again.

He carefully placed his fingers over the proper strings and gave it a quick strum just to double check that his chord was right.

Blaine sat full of anticipation as Kurt closed his eyes and began to play.

He immediately recognized the tune from The Script cd he had given Kurt.

You touch these tired eyes of mine

And map my face out line by line

And somehow growing old feels fine

I listen close for I'm not smart

You wrap your thoughts in works of art

And they're hanging on the walls of my heart

Kurt opened his eyes to look at Blaine and realized that his eyes were filling with tears.  He wore a small smile and looked at him as if he were his world.

                I may not have the softest touch

I may not say the words as such

And though I may not look like much

I'm yours

And though my edges may be rough

And never feel I'm quite enough

It may not seem like very much

But I'm yours

Blaine took over the song now as Kurt sat back listening while he strummed out the notes.

                You heeled these scars over time

Embraced my soul

You loved my mind

You're the only angel in my life

The day news came my best friend died

My knees went week and you saw me cry

Say I'm still the soldier in your eyes

I may not have the softest touch

I may not say the words as such

And though I may not look like much

I'm yours

And though my edges may be rough

And never feel I'm quite enough

It may not seem like very much

But I'm yours

Kurt joined Blaine now with perfect harmony for the last part of the song.

                I may not have the softest touch

I may not say the words as such

I know I don't fit in that much

But I'm yours

When the song was finished Blaine and Kurt just looked into each other's eyes for a long moment before Kurt put the guitar down.

"You know, I know you think that the note Riley left her was referring to the other song that you guys always talked about, but I like to think that she meant this song."

Blaine didn't say anything for a while; he just thought about Kurt's words.   It was going to take a lifetime of convincing to get Blaine to believe that.  But that's the thing; Blaine had his entire life ahead of him.

"I love you, Kurt.  I love you so much that just saying ‘I love you' feels like it doesn't even begin to cover how I feel about you.  I want to spend the rest of my life with you.  Without you I wouldn't have the rest of my life ahead of me."

"And I cannot even begin to imagine what my life would be like without you, Blaine.  I love you.  I will be here for forever; you and me against the world."

"You promise?"

"I promise."