I never wanted to move on from Kurt. I knew he was my future, I knew he was my life but when he ended it I didnt think of what was going to come next. I never thought Id be able to give up on him but he gave up on us and it was all my fault. What was I going to do?
When I found out about Adam, my world stopped, at that moment, I knew I had lost him for good. I knew that he was really done and he was moving on from me. I still loved him, I always would. I just had to stop feeling sorry for myself and maybe move on too.


It was late in October when things had really changed for me. I was standing in line at the Lima Bean, waiting for my coffee when he walked up.

“Blaine Anderson."

I spun around and saw him, “Sebastian. What are you doing here?"

“Just as everyone else, getting coffee. Im assuming you are doing the same."

I nodded and turned back around. What a smart ass.

“Hey," He put his hand on my shoulder. I spun around. “Look, umm I heard about you and Kurt. Im sorry."

I nodded, “Ya. Im sure you are."

“Blaine?" The barista called my name and I grabbed my coffee.

“Well, it was good seeing you Sebastian. I better go."

“Wait, can we talk?"

“Why? Whats there to talk about?"

“I want to formally apologize and maybe I dont know, be your friend?"

“Friend? You want to be friends?" Was he joking?

“Please, I know I dont deserve it but um please."

Why I did it I dont know. “Fine. We can talk."

“Thanks. Can you grab a table while I get my coffee?"

I nodded and walked towards a table. What am I doing? After all hes put me through. I grabbed a table anyway. I waited a few minutes there before he joined me.

“Thanks for staying Blaine." He said as he sat down.

I nodded, “Sure."

“I just want to say again how sorry I am for what I did to you. Im not that kind of person you know. When I transferred to Dalton, no one knew me there and I thought I could be another person. Try something new. It backfired on me."

“Yes you could say that."

“I am really sorry to hear about you and Kurt."

“I'm sure."

“No, I really am. I really liked Kurt."

I gave him a confused expression.

“Seriously. I did like him, I only treated him that way because I was jealous."

“Jealous?"

“Ya."

“What exactly were you jealous of?"

He looked at his coffee then back to me. “He had you. I mean you're like the hottest guy in these parts and nice too."

I looked into my drink. Its not the first time Ive been told I was attractive but I still blush every time.

“See? Even now you're blushing. You know you're hot but you're not cocky about it. Thats awesome."

I looked at him, “So what? You were mean to him cause you wanted to fuck me?"

He shook his head, “No, I mean yes but no. Umm, not just that. It just meant I couldnt get to know you better and it might have led to more."

“We could have just been friends you know."

He shook his head again, “No, I couldnt just be friends with you. Id be thinking of kissing you all the time. And I wouldnt trust myself not to try."

“So you made yourself the villain instead?"

He looked ashamed, “Ya. I guess. I never expected that slushy to do that. And even though it was intended for Kurt. That wasnt supposed to happen. I dont know why I added that rock salt to begin with. I guess I felt pressure to one up myself. I swear I never meant for anything bad to happen. You dont know how many times I sat outside your house, wanting to come apologize and just never having the strength to face you. That and I was deathly afraid of Kurt."

“Oh." I think I believed him. I remember how my mom told me she saw a car outside the house once, just sitting and running. That must have been him.

“Ya. Look Blaine. The only reason Im even able to do this now is because I know you're single."

“So you think Ill just start what? Dating you?"

“No, not at all. At least not right away, theres a whole good side to me that you dont know yet. And who knows, maybe youll learn to like me back."

Wow, this was not a conversation I was expecting. At least not from Sebastian.

“I know that seems forward Blaine but Im hoping youll give me a chance."

“To woo me?"

He laughed, " Sure, or court you whichever you prefer." He smiled.

He did have a nice smile and I laughed at his lame joke. “Right. What makes you think Id even be interested in you? After that slushy and what you pulled with Finn. Im sorry but you're also a bit of a slut."

He laughed again, “I've slept with two people Blaine. I dont think that makes me a slut. And that thing with Finn. I was never going to post that. I was scared. I knew you guys would win. I was just trying to stop that."

“Oh well, thats good to hear I guess and what about Scandals. And those stories."

“Stories, thats what they were. Just another piece to the persona I was trying to put out there."

“Oh, so lies?"

He looked down, “I guess. Ya."

Why was I feeling sorry for him? “Look Sebastian. I have to go, Im meeting a friend. But, “I grabbed a pen from my bag and wrote my number on a napkin.” Why dont you text me sometime."

“I already have your number."

“I changed it."

“Oh," He took the napkin and put it in his pocket. “I'll see you around?"

I nodded, “Sure. Bye Sebastian."

“Bye Blaine."

I walked out of the Lima Bean more confused then Id been in a while. Was I attracted to him? I mean he is good looking and he said he wasnt like that but can I believe him? Should I even bother? What do I have to lose though?