Chapter 3: Visits

Blaine was fidgeting in the huge armchair in Dr. Peterson office. The topic of their conversation had been getting on his nerves since he told her three weeks before he wanted new meds. Weaker ones. Even though the drugs he had been taking usually kept the alters at bay, Blaine felt they were driving him crazier than he already was. He was constantly sleepy, irritable, and his mood swings kept people at an even greater distance.

‘How long did Liam stay around this time?,’ Dr. Peterson asked. She was a middle-aged woman with rim-horned glasses perched on the tip of her nose, frizzy auburn hair and she had a thing for green and brown clothes. Blaine always had a feeling she had been a ninja somewhere in the jungle and she kept dressing in those colours out of habit to easily blend in with the trees.

‘Several hours, nothing out of the ordinary,’ he answered with a sigh. ‘It’s happened before, when I was medicated, Doc.’

She only answered with a nod and jotted something down in her notepad.

‘Was he behaving the same way?’

‘No,’ Blaine said firmly.

‘Did you experience co-consciousness with him?’ Dr. Peterson’s voice sounded a bit too excited for Blaine’s taste.

‘No. You know I never do with him.’

Blaine rolled his eyes, feeling this whole thing was getting really old. There hadn’t been any progress in years. Almost from the moment he was finally properly diagnosed in high school. The medication did help a little, at least in terms of controlling the alters, but the therapy wasn’t exactly successful. Maybe if the problem was discovering the reason behind Blaine’s disorder, they would have made a few steps forward. Only they’d always known what the reason was.

‘What was he doing, then?,’ Dr. Peterson asked, never losing her curiosity. Her eagerness in asking questions was really annoying sometimes.

‘He went out to the clubs, that was normal- I don’t know exactly what happened there,’ he said. ‘But he gave this one guy his cell number- I mean, my cell number.’

‘Did that guy call Liam?,’ Dr. Peterson raised her eyebrows.

‘He did.’ The therapist stayed silent, so he went on. ‘I met up with him and explained everything.’

Dr. Peterson spent a minute scribbling quietly, before raising her gaze back at Blaine.

‘How was it?’

Blaine shrugged. ‘Fine, I guess. He took it better than they normally do. I think he even took it better than Wes did the first time I told him.’

‘Did you like him?’

The out of the blue question made him frown.

‘What does it have to do with anything?’

‘I thought you wanted to be off meds, because you felt lonely and wanted to get out and maybe find someone,’ she replied calmly.

‘I do, but do I really have to fling myself at some guy that Liam seemed to like?’

She sent him a sad smile.

‘Of course, you don’t have to. But you did like him, too, didn’t you?’

‘Okay, maybe I did,’ Blaine sighed. ‘It doesn’t matter, anyway.’

***

It had been over a week since Kurt met Blaine, and he was beginning to forget the whole affair whatsoever. A random thought of the night at the club or the lunch would pop into his head from time to time, usually accompanied by a sigh of regret. Why couldn’t he just meet a regular guy that would be interested in him? If only he met Blaine under different circumstances and the guy didn’t have that freaky disorder… He really could picture himself with Blaine. For some weird reason, he even found himself imagining the two of them as a couple once, but pushed the thought away in haste.

There was really no way Blaine would ever want to see Kurt again, like he probably never wanted to see any of Liam’s hook-ups. And even if he did, why would anybody choose to be with someone living with a disease like this?

By next Monday, Kurt was over this kind of thoughts. He was coming to terms with the possibility of having to get old alone, and started considering getting a cat. Or a dozen of them.

Late on Tuesday afternoon, just as he was getting on the train back home, however, he received the strangest text in his life. At first, he frowned, seeing Liam’s name on his cell phone screen. He’d forgotten to change it to Blaine’s, and didn’t even think of deleting it. His frown only deepened, when he opened the message.

It held nothing more than an address. He didn’t know the street name, so he ran a quick Google search on his phone to find out it was a residential building (he’d figured as much by the apartment number), only several streets away from his own apartment in Bushwick. It was confusing. Why would Blaine text him this address? Presumably his address? Or was it Liam? Or Kathryn? Or… whatever the others’ names were?

The only explanation that sprang to his mind that sort of made sense, was that something was wrong and Blaine simply didn’t have anyone else to turn to. Kurt couldn’t remember him mention anybody close, so there was a chance that was the case. With people’s attitudes being the way they are, even in New York City, it had to be hard to keep people around. It was impossible not to feel bad for Blaine.

Kurt took another glance at the map of Brooklyn and checked the subway stations. Getting to the address would take switching the train a couple of times, but he didn’t mind. The decision was made.

It wouldn’t hurt him – hopefully – to check up on Blaine, and at least his conscience would let him sleep at night. Otherwise, he wouldn’t even know if he hadn’t ignored a cry for help.

***

Kurt soon realized he should’ve gotten off at the previous station. He walked the six blocks briskly, paying close attention to the numbers on the buildings. Finding the right one was easy.

It was a nice three-storey house in a apparently pleasant neighbourhood. It suited Blaine, but Kurt expected to Liam to feel a little out of place here. He opened the front door hesitantly, taking a peek inside before walking in. The hallway was quiet and completely empty. A quick scan of the doors leading to the first floor apartments let him know he’d guessed right that he’d have to go a storey up. He jogged up a flight of stairs, and stopped, before proceeding to where he thought he’d find apartment 2B.

Once he made it to the door, he paused with his hand half-raised. The door was remarkably unremarkable. Behind it could leave a middle-aged accountant, or an exclusive call-girl, or a single mother with a toddler. Or a twenty-something guy with a mental illness. Kurt shivered at the thought of what he might find inside. Would anyone even answer? Should he be worried? God, of course he should. If Blaine wanted to see him, plain and simple, he’d call or send a regular text. Or would he? A million thoughts came crashing on Kurt with the speed of lightning, and he shook his head to clear it.

He wouldn’t turn away now. His mind was made up. He’d made it up long ago. Whatever was waiting for him on the other side, he was going to face it. Now he wasn’t even sure he ever really had a choice.

His hand trembled as he rang the bell, its shrill sound perfectly audible from the inside. It took a couple of seconds for some shuffling and footsteps to follow, and for the door to open.

‘Yes?,’ the young man who opened the door asked. It wasn’t Blaine or any of his alters. He looked curiously, but politely at Kurt.

‘I- I’m Kurt- I’m looking for Blaine,’ he stammered in response.

The guy raised his eyebrows, a hint of realization in his eyes.

‘Come on in,’ he said, stepping out of the way to let him pass. ‘I’m Wes, Blaine’s roommate. The nicer one.’

Kurt frowned, but crossed the threshold. So there were roommates? Blaine didn’t say anything about roommates. Apparently, there was someone to take care of him. Why the text, then? The constant unknowing and confusion were unnerving.

‘Sorry, he didn’t say he had roommates,’ he mumbled finally, as Wes led him into the kitchen space which was divided from a cramped living room by a high counter.

Another guy, tall and a little lanky was sitting at the counter with a mug of coffee and some papers. He raised his eyes at the other two.

‘Sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude, it’s just I got this text from Blaine- or one of his- um- alters?,’ Kurt hesitated at the word. Obviously, Blaine’s roommates had to be aware of his disorder, but he didn’t want to come off as insensitive.

‘Oooh, so you’re Liam’s boy candy from last weekend,’ the guy at the counter said.

Kurt’s cheeks turned flaming red, making the author of the remark smirk. Wes rolled his eyes, and then glared at his roommate.

‘That’s Sebastian, the not-so-nice roommate,’ he introduced him. ‘Seb, this is Kurt, be nice, please.’

‘So- um- is Blaine home?,’ Kurt asked hurriedly. He didn’t want to stay if everything was alright and this whole trip was just a huge overreaction on his part.

Wes and Sebastian exchanged a look. The latter lost a little of his good humour.

‘Kinda,’ he said.

Kurt was just about to ask what Sebastian meant, but the message clicked in his brain before he managed a word out.

‘Oh. Who is home then?’

Wes gestured Kurt to walk into the living room and sit on the couch. He obeyed silently, his gaze never leaving the other man, who sat opposite him in an armchair.

‘Actually, we don’t really know,’ Wes said. ‘I mean, he’s asleep now, so it’s hard to tell, who it’s gonna be when he wakes up.’

Kurt nodded understandingly. ‘But someone else turned up before, right?,’ he ventured a guess.

‘How much exactly did he tell you?,’ Wes asked.

‘Not much,’ he replied carefully. ‘Well, I’ve met Liam, obviously. Blaine said there were others… He mentioned Kathryn?’ Both roommates acknowledged it with nods. ‘Was it her? Or Liam?’

Sebastian glanced at Wes with worry, before leaving the room quickly. A door somewhere down the corridor creaked.

‘There’s a lot he didn’t tell you, you know that?’

‘I do,’ Kurt said, his throat suddenly clenching.

‘He didn’t tell you how many of them there were?’ Kurt shook his head no. ‘So I’m not going to tell you either. This has to be something he tells you, if he so sees fit. I’ll just tell you that today’s been pretty bad.’

Kurt’s heart was pounding, nauseating. His instinct was right and he really hated that. ‘How bad?,’ he asked weakly.

‘All of them showed up.’

There was no way for Kurt to suppress the expression of shock that came onto his face, just as Sebastian returned to the room.

‘He’s still sleeping,’ he said.

‘Good, he should rest,’ Wes sighed.

For a second they seemed to have forgotten Kurt was still there.

‘Did something- like- um- trigger that?,’ he asked warily, aware that he was probably crossing some line or other.

Wes pursed his lips, but Sebastian wasn’t as unwilling to share.

‘His dad called, and that’s never pretty.’ He shrugged his shoulders.

Kurt decided not to ask any more questions, but Wes seemed to remember he had one of his own.

‘Hey, Kurt, you were saying something about a text?’

Deciding it was better to give them something more than empty words, Kurt pulled out his phone and opened the text from earlier.

‘I got this from him today,’ he said, handing Wes his iPhone. ‘Or from Liam, I don’t know who that was.’

‘I think it was Liam,’ Wes said, frowning and analyzing the time stamp. ‘It’s weird, though. This really isn’t good.’ That last sentence was directed to Sebastian, who only shrugged one more time.

‘You know you won’t convince him,’ Seb replied. ‘And if his doc agreed to try it this way, he has to bear with it. We all do.’

Kurt had no idea, what to make of their exchange. Apart from the piece of information that was glaringly clear: Blaine was in a very bad shape. If he ever regretted coming, he stopped in this particular moment.

Wes turned back to face him. Kurt hadn’t noticed earlier, but he looked exhausted.

‘Do you want to wait until he wakes up?,’ he asked.

Without taking a second to consider it, Kurt nodded.