Kurt inhaled a long breath, before exhaling, trying to stay calm. He focused solely on the task ahead which was to make it known to Blaine that he wanted him by his side, that he’d need to take it slow, but that he didn’t want to have to go a second without having Blaine there. Being able to have lunch after classes with him, to pretend to study for exams together, to go to bed and wake up in each others arms…He pushed those thoughts aside, he was all ready planning the future; the future that he might not even have. “Hey,” he said softly, meeting Blaine’s eyes as he walked up to the coffee counter. “I um, I need to get some coffee for this guy I know,” Kurt said softly, giving Blaine a playful smile. “He’s practically perfect, and I just want him to know how much I need him. Is there a coffee that gives off that…vibe?” He asked, trying hard not to laugh at how lame he sounded.

Blaine’s eyes didn’t want to stray from Kurt’s but he was busy and had to focus on not spilling drinks everywhere. Finally Kurt was at the counter and placing a very sweet order. “I happen to believe that cinnamon is good for saying you’re needed.” Blaine smiled. “So is coming to my work and making me smile.” He added. Blaine’s stress from earlier that morning ebbed back a good deal. He and Kurt were okay, he wasn’t sure exactly where they were, but he knew now that they were okay. “Let me get someone up here so we can talk.” He said, dropping his voice while he put in an order under his employee account for Kurt.

Kurt smiled at Blaine, thankful that he didn’t ask him to leave. Once they were at a table in the far corner, he let out a long sigh. “I just want to say, that…as hard as this is for me right now, and as hard as it is for Sam, I know that it’s probably actually most difficult for you.” He had been looking down as he spoke, but finally forced himself to look up. “And I want you to know that this isn’t your fault. I…I should have been more careful, and I’m sorry.” He bit his lips, his hands shaking a bit. ” But….if you still want, I really, really want to be with you. But we need to go slow. I love you, Blaine, but I’ve seen what you do in relationships, you completely self destruct and I can’t….I can’t ever be anything negative for you.” He looked away, trying not to cry. “I…I just can’t do that. I need, I need to know that if we do this, we’ll…we’ll be ok. I can’t lose you, B. I can’t. And I know how you are in this and I know how I am. I just….I want to be everything good by you.”

Blaine was so happy all of a sudden that the feeling was simply too big to grasp. Though it was being tempered somehow by the rest of what Kurt was saying. Kurt was his, Kurt was cautious. It was a fine balance, and one that both concerned Blaine and thrilled him. He needed a moment to think, to arrange his response not only in his mind but for Kurt who deserved something epic after his declaration. Blaine reached across the table and took Kurt’s hand in his own. “You are amazing, Kurt Hummel. After all of this you come and say the kindest things to me.” Blaine shook his head slowly in wonder; his eyes big and expressive for a change. “I want to be with you, I have always wanted to be with you, and we will go slow because I want it to be what you deserve, and we will be alright because if for some reason we don’t work out, you are still the my best friend and I will never not want and need you in my life.” Blaine took a deep breath and faced the hardest part of what Kurt had said. “I’ll do right by you Kurt; somehow I will find a way to do right by you.” He emphasized this with a squeeze to Kurt’s hands.

Kurt smiled softly, and squeezed Blaine’s hand in an attempt to calm his clammy hands and to try and reassure Blaine in how much he trusted him, how much he loved him, always. The last few years had been so difficult on both of them. Blaine had gotten more and more self destructive, spending practically every night at the club, it was no wonder he had been broke and unable to pay rent. Their relationship had been so tricky; Blaine had been a mess, manipulative and having such a big influence how Kurt had lived.

Kurt had wanted so many times to kiss him, to be Blaine’s, but he was terrified. He was terrified of what would happen between them. He let out a long sigh and nodded finally, leaning across the table to kiss Blaine. He forced himself to keep the kiss light, for he was terrified about how intense the kiss could get. “I trust you, Blaine. I always have and I always will. I don’t doubt for a second you doing right by me. I don’t doubt it at all,” he spoke softly, pouring his cycling emotions into his words. He needed Blaine to feel loved, he needed Blaine to trust that Kurt could handle it, that together, they were make it through whatever the world threw at them, that together, they would better each other. “We’re going to get through this, B…” he whispered. “I promise.” His words shook a bit, he couldn’t lie that he was scared. Their relationship, whatever it had been before was already so intense. But Kurt knew, he knew that he and Blaine needed each other. They were meant to be. They always had been.

Blaine meant ever word he said, he did want to do right by Kurt, actually doing right, that was going to be another story. Then, when Kurt kissed him softly, just casually, it moved something inside Blaine. It broke away some of the shell he kept around his heart, and Blaine that, ‘this is really happening. This is going to work!’ The kiss left a small slightly dazed smile on Blaine’s face. Blaine nodded as Kurt spoke. It was a lot for both of them, it was a huge step, but they were taking the steps together, they didn’t have to do this alone. “We can help each other, Kurt, we can get through together, and then, we can just see where it takes us. We’ve always been good at taking care of each other.” Now his voice was shaking. Blaine had all the hope in the world, but his emotions were those of a seventeen year old, as if the time that ad passed meant nothing, and he was going to fall in love with Kurt all over again.