Jan. 17, 2012, 7:08 p.m.
Fills My Head: Chapter 7
M - Words: 1,779 - Last Updated: Jan 17, 2012 Story: Complete - Chapters: 20/20 - Created: Nov 04, 2011 - Updated: Jan 17, 2012 1,681 0 8 0 1
The smell of coffee filled the air as Blaine and Kurt stepped in to Kurt’s favorite coffee shop, the Lima Bean. Kurt groaned at the loud noises of chatter, blenders, and shouted coffee orders.
“Remind me to never ever drink again, okay? Or at least to do it smartly, like you.” Blaine laughed sympathetically as Kurt’s features scrunched.
“Will do. What’ll it be? My treat,” he said as they approached the register. “I’ll have a medium coffee and…”
“Grande non-fat mocha,” Kurt added. “Thanks, Blaine.” The two got their coffees and headed for a table in the back. Blaine had surprisingly never been in a coffee shop; he’d never seen the point. His parents had coffee and a machine at home—why pay so much for something he could get for free? He looked around the café, surprised at what he saw. There were couples sitting shoulder to shoulder, college students who looked like they’d had a rougher night that Kurt, some elderly people, and some who were engrossed in their laptops or books. This place had all kinds of people—coffee shop culture, or so he’d heard. He took a sip of the coffee and was amazed. It really was so much better than what he had at home. He thought he was going to need to get a job.
“Was last night your first party, Blaine?” Kurt asked and took a sip of his drink.
“Um, yes.” Blaine blushed. He was in high school, for goodness sakes. He should be partying all the time, he should be drinking all the time, and he certainly should have been drunk at least once in his life by now, right? He didn’t want Kurt to think he was a loner. He was a loner, of course, but he didn’t think Kurt realized the full extent of it.
“I’m sorry, Blaine,” Kurt said. “I should have asked. That was probably really uncomfortable for you, huh? It got a little out of control last night…”
“Kurt, no, please don’t worry about it. I actually had fun. It was different, yes, and a little overwhelming at first, but I honestly had a good time.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, Kurt,” Blaine laughed, “I’m sure.”
“You’re not just lying to make me feel better, are you?”
“No, Kurt. Stop worrying. I knew you would watch out for me.” Kurt smiled and looked down at his hands. The two sat in silence as they sipped on their drinks. The coffee seemed to be helping Kurt, who was no longer wincing at every noise. Blaine thought he looked much happier now than he had ten minutes ago. He learned a long time ago that coffee was God’s gift to mankind, so he wasn’t at all surprised at its hangover-healing powers.
“So, you and Santana,” Blaine teased after a few minutes.
“Oh, god. Me and Santana,” Kurt groaned. “I totally forgot about that.” He let his head thump on the table and Blaine could see the blush creeping up his neck. It was attractive, he thought. “Somehow she and I always end up making out at parties. I don’t know why, I mean, I’m gay! I’m not even attracted to her. And every time she asks if we can have sex. The woman is determined, I swear.”
“To have, um, to do… that with you? Why?”
“Oh, I can never remember. Drunken Santana just wants to sleep with a gay or something like that. I don’t know.” Blaine took a sip as he mulled this over in his head. So Santana, the promiscuous cheerleader, wanted to do that with Kurt whenever she was drunk. And making out at parties was a—thing—that they did. And Kurt, he just brushed it off like it wasn’t a big deal. Was it not a big deal? Or was it that she was a girl? Was glee that kind of club? Was Kurt that kind of guy? Because if so, Blaine was in way over his head. Kurt wouldn’t want some fumbling virgin when he could get his, um, fun elsewhere. Oh god, Kurt was so much more experienced than Blaine. Kurt was a 10. He was funny, smart, sassy, gorgeous, and experienced. Blaine was, like, a two. He was smart, but too smart. He was quiet and shy and didn’t know how to talk to people. He wasn’t that good looking, and even if he was it would be hidden behind his glasses and his damned triangle eyebrows. Blaine could tell you the exact angle of his eyebrows, what kind of triangles they were, and how to solve for x if he had two of their measurements. What he couldn’t tell you, though, is what it felt like to kiss somebody, or what the hell you’re supposed to do with your tongue when you did. He felt like he’d spent his whole life learning the wrong things.
“Blaine?” Kurt asked, snapping him out of his reverie. “Have you ever kissed anybody?” Blaine never answered. Instead he blushed to the tips of his ears. If he had looked down at his arms, they probably would have been red, too.
“It’s nothing to be embarrassed about. I’ve never kissed anybody besides Santana. Maybe that’s her deal, she likes the idea of taking peoples’ firsts…” Kurt trailed off.
“Really? Never?” Blaine asked. “I thought you’d have kissed a lot of guys.” Kurt looked at him, and Blaine thought he saw a flash of anger. “It’s just that, I mean, you’re so, so…confident. You walk around McKinley like you own the place, and even when people are mean to you, you just keep on going. And you’re beautiful, Kurt. Your eyes and your…” Blaine’s hand flew to his mouth as he registered the words that were leaking out and he looked at Kurt. Kurt’s eyes were huge, his body frozen, his face blank.
“I, um. S-sorry. I should just…go.” Blaine stood up hastily and ran out of the shop. Embarrassed tears filled his eyes as he crossed the parking lot. Dang it, Blaine. You are so stupid! You should have just kept your mouth shut. Now Kurt is going to think you’re some creepy—
“Blaine! Wait!” He picked up his pace. He didn’t want to talk to Kurt, to face the rejection. If he had never agreed to tutor him none of this would be happening. Oh god, and he knows that I’m gay. He’s going to tell the whole school I’m some…some… predatory gay or something. Hot tears were streaking his face by the time he reached the abandoned pond behind the lot.
“Blaine, please wait! Listen to me!” Blaine felt an arm on his, pulling him, begging him to stop.
“What Kurt?” Blaine spun, the hurt in his eyes evident. “What do you want? An apology? Because I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I agreed to tutor you and I’m sorry that I came to your stupid party and I’m sorry I’m not what you wanted.” His breath shuttered as he tried to hold in his tears. If Kurt was going to do this, to reject him, he didn’t get to see how it made Blaine feel. “Just leave me alone.”
“Blaine, wait. Look, I’m sorry too, okay? You just surprised me back there, is all,” he reached out and grabbed Blaine’s arm. When Blaine finally looked at his face, he saw that Kurt looked just as scared and hurt as he did.
“I just,” Kurt lowered his arm and looked at his shoes, “nobody has ever said those things to me before.”
“Nobody? Why?” Kurt chuckled and let his eyes meet Blaine’s.
“Blaine, I’ve never had a boyfriend. I don’t know the first thing about relationships or sex or any of that stuff. You said I walk through McKinley like I own the place, like the bullies don’t get to me, but that place terrifies me, Blaine. People are cruel and they get me down. They see me as ‘the gay kid’ and that’s all I am. They don’t think I’m beautiful,” he whispered, his head hanging once again.
“I do.”
Blaine watched Kurt blush, and it was even better than last time; this time, he had made it happen.
“You said you’re not what I wanted, but you are, Blaine. You’re exactly who I want. You’re charming and smart and kind. You’re shy and quiet, but I can tell there’s a really cool guy in there if he’d give himself a chance.”
Blaine didn’t know what to say. Kurt wanted him? Kurt thought he was charming? Kurt wanted him—did he mention that? There were so many thoughts swirling in his head, so many emotions. He didn’t know if he wanted to laugh or cry or build Kurt a castle. This was beyond anything he had ever let himself imagine. The boy of his dreams was standing right in front of him, telling him he wanted to be with him. The smile that appeared on his face was bigger than any he could remember. Heck, it was probably bigger than any smile ever.
Unable to come up with any response, Blaine just stared. He watched as Kurt’s arm started to rise, and his heart started pounding when he felt it rest on the back of his neck. Kurt took a step forward. When he looked down at Blaine’s lips, the entire world went quiet. His breath quickened as Kurt moved ever so slowly towards his lips.
Blaine had always found it cheesy when people said kissing was like fireworks, but now he understood. The feeling of Kurt’s lips on his was amazing—the best feeling ever, he thought. This was magical. This was better than Sam and Frodo getting rescued after throwing the ring in the fire. This was better than finishing a quest on World of Warcraft. Blaine vowed then and there to never play the game again if it meant he got to do this more. This was perfect.
When Kurt finally broke the kiss, Blaine stood in a daze, eyes shifting from Kurt’s eyes to his lips. His legs felt wobbly and his breath was uneven. He could only pull himself together enough to grin up at Kurt, who smiled back, took Blaine’s hand, and walked them slowly back to the car.
“Hey, Blaine?” Kurt said, his voice light and happy.
“Yeah?”
“Your eyes are beautiful too.”
Comments
Awww Blainers!
I legitimately cackled at the part about Blaine's eyebrows hahah. I love this! (:
Oh my gosh! You are so sweet, thank you.
I am staring at my screen in complete adoration; for Klaine and you, you beautiful author. aaaaa I've been waiting for them to get together, seemingly forever, though probably not as long as Blaine. This story is amazing!! I can't waiiit for more :D
AWWW THAT WAS SOOO CUTE!
Ahhhhhh! How exciting!
*fangirl squee*
Amazing as always. I hope the projects going well.